


Of Whiskey and Tequila

by Jewelgirl04



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2018-02-25 07:52:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 96,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2614103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jewelgirl04/pseuds/Jewelgirl04
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Lust tastes like tequila, love tastes like whiskey. Love burns for longer, warms you up on the inside and sometimes makes you do stupid things. Tequila just makes you wasted. You get wasted on lust and warmed on love.” - Anonymous</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lonlygnome](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonlygnome/gifts).



> Written for Rine, inspired by our muses. Also dedicated to Shannon and De, without whom I could never have found my inner Bones.

_**"Lust tastes like tequila, love tastes like whiskey. Love burns for longer, warms you up on the inside and sometimes makes you do stupid things. Tequila just makes you wasted. You get wasted on lust and warmed on love.”** _

For the longest time, Danielle Blake was convinced that Leonard McCoy was tequila.

Her addiction to the substance began in the most unconventional way, born of red satin and set to simmer on a desk as its contents clattered to the floor, the plinks and thuds echoing off the walls. Growls and gasps cut through the air in the moments thereafter, breathless moans taking up residence in the darkest, most lustful parts of her brain.

She’d sampled the spirit before. It was bitter and sour most of the time, filled with lingering loneliness when the shot glass was empty. Every time she tried the amber liquid, she was convinced it would taste better on the tongue. Yet, the aftertaste was still acrid, caused her stomach to churn for days, if not weeks.

So shortly after she packed up her possessions into two suitcases and asked her neighbor to keep an eye on the place while she was gone, Danielle Blake had sworn that she’d never consume the vile substance again. Her fledgling career in Starfleet was too fragile and not even the near-incineration at the hands of a particularly psychotic Romulan could change her mind, despite the inclination of many other cadets to jump in as many foreign beds as possible because the world could conceivably end at any time.

No, nothing could tempt Danielle Blake again.

At least, not until a year into her commission.

The McCoy label of tequila was particularly alluring. The bottle was tall and dark, with a sharp lip that dared connoisseurs to take a shot, to see if they could come away unscathed. Yet, its contents were syrupy and honey-smooth.

She’d resisted for a long time, used to being the pursued and never the pursuer, like a purveyor of the finest vintages of wine with the want to turn a profit, but never sampled the holy liquid herself. But somehow, under the painful haze of first-degree burns and the cooling touch of steady hands, she’d given into the urge to sate her thirst.

And damn it if it wasn’t the best tequila she’d ever tasted. The buzz lingered longer than anything she’d ever consumed, carried her through the ship-wide festivities later that evening and ushered her back to his quarters on a cloud of desire. And just when her hangover started to take root, pricking at her temples with the first strands of morning curling around her limbs, the gentle caress of his digits over her bare skin warded it away.

Danielle had lain there for hours, letting him map out paths between her sparse freckles with the pads of his fingers until his lips and tongue took over and they’d rolled across the rumpled sheets into a rhythm that was startlingly familiar and foreign all at once.

The doctors had parted to get ready for their respective Alpha shifts, but the moment wasn’t nearly as awkward as she’d have thought it would be. Even as a one night stand, Leonard McCoy was a generous, affectionate lover, chockfull of long, soft kisses that persisted right up until the moment you crossed the threshold and hurried down the hall to sneak into your quarters in nothing more than a wrinkled Playboy bunny costume. At least, that’s how it was for her.

She spent most of her shift pointedly _not_ thinking about how much concealer she’d needed to use on her neck and shoulders, how she could still feel the grip he’d had on her wrists as his chiseled body pinned her to the mattress and rocked against hers until she swore her vision curled white at the edges.

But just as Danielle had finally managed to shake their proclivities from her brain long enough to close her eyes and catch up on the sleep she’d been enthusiastically, and repeatedly, deprived of in the last twenty-four hours, her PADD beeped and ripped her brain from its idle state.

[PADD Message] Hope you had a good shift. I most certainly did. Don’t remember the last time I was this sore… - L

[PADD Message: Leonard McCoy] Me either. Definitely made for an interesting eight hours.

[PADD Message] Well worth it. Would you consider allowing me the privilege and pleasure of your company again sometime? – L

This kind of tequila wasn’t just some Hornitos or Jose Cuervo that seemed premiere to frat boys a few ticks of the hour hand past twenty-one, or even the Patron that any run-of-the-mill restaurant chain referred to as their top shelf bottle.

No, Leonard McCoy was Asombroso, forged from hand-picked, decade-old Blue Agave plants, aged five years in Port Wine barrels, and imparted with a nuanced sweetness to further soften the finish.

A taste would set you back $65, a bottle $1,100. It was the type of tequila that would bring even the most discerning palette to its knees and she’d yet to have her fill.

[PADD Message: Leonard McCoy] I’d like that.

[PADD Message] How about tomorrow night? Around… 20:00? - L

[PADD Message: Leonard McCoy] Shall I leave the bunny costume at home then?

[PADD Message] I’d rather you bring an overnight bag… wouldn’t mind having you to myself for an extra hour or two in the morning. Could be quite productive. - L

[PADD Message: Leonard McCoy] I’ll see you tomorrow, Leo. xoxo

* * *

Danielle wasn’t certain what to expect the next evening. Sure, she was craving another taste of what Leonard McCoy had to offer, but the practical aspects of a friends-with-benefits arrangement was still new to her. In fact, the normally-confident and self-assured scientist was downright nervous as she stood on his doorstep. But the moment the door opened to reveal the CMO in a pair of jeans and a navy v-neck tee, a crooked grin on his face, all of her earlier thoughts slipped.

“You clean up well, Dr. McCoy,” Danielle remarked with a curl of her lips.

His mouth twisted into a smirk and he stepped aside, flicking his wrist towards the interior of his quarters. “I could say the same for you, Dr. Blake. Come on in… I was just about to attempt to throw together dinner.”

“Dinner?” She slid her hands into her back pockets, tilting her head in slight surprise that didn’t go unnoticed by her companion.

“I’m from the South, darlin’. It’s practically engrained in my DNA how to treat a lady,” he drawled demonstratively, stepping away from her to return his attention to the replicator. “A few months back, I programmed in the recipe for my mama’s pot roast and peach cobbler. Figured now’s as good a time as any to try it out.”

“So…” Danielle trailed him over to the small counter and hopped up on the surface. From her perch, she watched as he slipped a card into the slot and tapped a series of codes into the keypad. “What you’re saying is that I’m your guinea pig,” she concluded with a raise of her eyebrows.

Laughter rumbled through his chest as he pressed the command key. “Well…”

“ _Wow_ …” She let out a scoff, accompanied by a roll of her eyes. “What was that about knowing how to treat a lady again?”

Leonard stepped sideways until he was directly in front of her. “You didn’t let me finish,” he countered while nudging his body between her legs. “If you _had_ ,” he posited further, curling his fingers around her hips, “you’d know that I think you’re an incredibly beautiful guinea pig, Dr. Blake.”

Her teeth sunk into her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle her burgeoning grin “Am I now?”

“ _Oh yeah_ ,” he assured her with an impressed nod. Then he reached up to thumb at her bottom lip, tugging it out from her bite. “Don’t do that, darlin’. I like your mouth.” Leonard slowly leaned forward, closing the space between them at eye-level. “A lot, as it happens,” he tacked on offhandedly before moving in for the kill, eliminating the remaining distance to take her lips with his own.

Danielle wasn’t sure how long they stayed that way. At some point, the replicator beeped, indicating that their entrees were ready for consumption. So the best she could figure, they’d been making out like a pair of teenagers in the back of a movie theater for as long as it took to replicate a pot roast.

Dinner was pleasant, filled with casual conversation and red wine, anecdotes about their exploits during their respective days at Starfleet Academy. Or really their roommates’ exploits considering that they each found themselves with a roommate they parented, rather than actually lived with.

By the time they got to the peach cobbler and the second glass of merlot, Danielle realized that she genuinely enjoyed having someone to hang out with at the end of a long day. And though she was concerned the sex wouldn’t live up to the high bar set two days earlier, the blonde was pleasantly surprised (in more ways than one) that Leonard McCoy was no one-hit wonder.

And incredibly deserving of the Asombroso label.

* * *

 

They continued on like this for a long while, with nights spent in Leonard’s quarters usually three times a week in the beginning. Then three turned into four and four turned into five and it was becoming harder for them to conceal their arrangement from their friends when they were on board the Enterprise.

Jim was the first to realize something was different about his CMO, who had just the slightest spring in his step on most mornings that had _nothing_ to do with the man’s coffee consumption. Yet, any attempts the captain made to get to the bottom of his fractionally improved mood were met with a sour twist of Leonard’s lips and an office door shut in his face.

Truthfully, Danielle was more than a bit perplexed by their arrangement. She had no complaints regarding Leonard McCoy’s sexual prowess, more than willing to attest to the fact that he undeniably had the best hands in all of Starfleet, but there was a strange facet to their “relationship” that she couldn’t quite put her finger on.

Or maybe she could. Though no one would know that there was anything more than a professional cordiality between the scientist and the doctor just by looking at them in the corridors, their pre and post-coital interactions behind closed doors were the complete opposite. When Danielle agreed to their arrangement, she’d been expecting one-track visits and sneaking out to her quarters under the cover of darkness to shower and then sleep, not dinners and movies on holovids and swapping stories of the ridiculous antics of junior officers. She certainly _hadn’t_ been expecting him to sling an arm around her while watching said holovids on his couch or keep her back firmly pressed against his chest as they drifted off to sleep in his bed.

“Can I ask you something?” she inquired one night roughly six months into their arrangement. Leonard’s body was half-slung over hers so that he could trace his fingertips over the ruddy marks spotting her neck and chest. “And I’m going to be honest, there isn’t exactly a polite way of saying it.”

“What?” McCoy cocked an eyebrow at her, a highly-amused smirk gracing his normally-hardened face. “You afraid you’re going to offend my delicate Southern constitution?”

“No,” she mumbled. “I’m just usually a lot more tactful.”

He snorted. “Sweetheart, I spent nearly four years living with Jim. It’d take a hell of a lot to offend me at this point.”

The corner of her mouth lifted. “Weren’t you the one who once told me that with a naked woman in your bed, the last thing you wanted to think about was Jim Kirk?”

“No,” he corrected her, tapping a particularly dark mark on the column of her throat. “I think I said with a _beautiful,_ naked woman in my bed, the last thing I wanted to think about was Jim Kirk.” His tongue darted out to whet his curled lips. “And I _also_ think you’re stallin’, Darlin’.”

“Fine.” She tilted her head, as though she was already evaluating him in anticipation of an impending change in his demeanor. “Why do you ask me to stay?”

Leonard merely blinked at her in response. “Why do I ask you to stay?”

“Yeah.” She dipped her head. “When I think about no strings attached sex… friends with benefits… whatever you want to call it…” Danielle waved her hand flippantly. “It’s one and done.” A raise of Leonard’s brows caused a flush to creep up her cheeks and she couldn’t help but smile. “Alright, a few times and done,” she corrected herself to his smug satisfaction, which earned him a playful smack of his shoulder. “But you understand what I’m saying, Leo. This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.”

“Why? Is there some manual or handbook that I don’t know about?” he retorted with an upturn of his left hand, Academy ring glinting in the light of his bedroom. “Just because we're having fun doesn't mean it has to be like that. To me…” His hand came to rest on his heart momentarily. “Sex is more than just the act itself. It's the build up and the foreplay, no matter what ninety-five percent of the human male population thinks…” Leonard grunted at the notion. “And that's just as important to me as sharing the afterglow and enjoying that high together as long as possible. The reason I ask you to bring your bag isn’t for the sake of keeping up appearances, Danielle. It's because I genuinely want you to stay."

Danielle couldn’t help but look at him incredulously. She’d always known that Leonard was a far different person off-duty, but never realized how introspective he was when it came to relationships. In that moment, she chalked it up to a man burned by divorce with a new perspective of what it meant to care for someone, even if you were just friends and enjoying more intimate activities while shrouded by starlight.

So if the next time Danielle Blake kissed Leonard McCoy, his lips tasted a little less spicy, burned with the taste of something much richer, she pretended not to notice.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His persistent silence worried her, but the gentle brush of his fingers over her own a few minutes later gave her hope that he hadn’t completely toppled over the edge just yet.

It was a random evening on an otherwise uneventful day that changed everything between Danielle Blake and Leonard McCoy.

Over the course of the past few weeks, they’d started spending more time together outside of his quarters. They never shared more than a dinner or two a week in Ten Forward or a coffee in the officers’ observatory. Because they met under the guise of swapping information regarding scientific curiosities observed on recent away missions, their meetings didn’t seem out of the ordinary to their fellow crewmembers.

But on the day referred to as September 1, 2258 back on Earth, something far from ordinary occurred as Danielle approached Leonard’s door, poised to knock. Rather than the sound of him rifling through his paperwork, her ears were assailed by muffled sobs.

She tried calling out to him in a soft tone through the door, but the faint sound of the shower quickly made it clear that her efforts would be for nothing if she didn’t speak up. She called to him louder the second time, concern evident in her voice. McCoy was nothing if not a rock, both inside of the Medbay and out, so his distress was greatly concerning. And though she’d never admit it, Danielle had to fight to suppress the panic welling in her throat.

The silence was deafening.

Danielle quickly tapped in the security override she’d received with her promotion to Strategic Operations Officer in the aftermath of the Nero incident and surged into his quarters. She could hear the water pummeling the tile walls, signaling that he had sequestered himself in his bathroom. But the crying was louder now, even if a door stifled it.

“Leo…” she called again, her voice accompanied by a knock on the bathroom door. “Are you alright in there?”

Relief flooded through her as he answered, the shower no longer flowing. “Fine!” A beat of silence followed. “Perfectly alright…”

A fissure formed straight through the center of her heart at the uncertainty in Leonard’s voice. “Can I…” She gently gripped the doorknob. This was new territory for the doctors, above the call of an intent ear when it came to bitching about a particularly troublesome dignitary or a procrastinating captain. “Can I come in?”

When he agreed with an atypically soft ‘yes’, she pushed open the door to find him with a towel around his waist, fingers curled around the edge of the sink like he was holding on for dear life, as rivulets of water dripped onto the tile floor. Leonard’s face was much paler than she was accustomed to and his eyes were red and swollen. If she didn’t know him intimately, Danielle would swear that the man before her was a cheap imitation of the CMO.

Before she had the chance to speak, Leonard turned slowly with his head dipped and took a few steps closer to the blonde. Blake instinctively raised her arms a few inches, palms turned upwards in silent invitation. He slipped his arms around the woman in gracious acceptance so that his body was pressed up against hers.

“Did something happen after shift?” Danielle inquired in a quiet voice as her fingers stroked along his damp skin to try and soothe him. He shook his head. “During?” He nodded, but didn’t offer any more details. “I’ve gotten used to dealing with problems on my own, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t wish I had someone to just _be there.”_ She pulled back just enough to cup his face in her hands, green eyes staring back at him. “Let me be here for you.”

Leonard was silent for a long while, just searching her face as though an answer resided there. Her features never once faltered and she didn’t try to move, hoping that whatever solution he was looking for could be found as he studied her.

Finally, McCoy spoke up. “One of the crewmen on the ship we rescued… he’s dying. He contracted some sort of poisoning from alien fauna that I’ve never even seen, let alone heard of.” His eyes slipped shut as though he was reliving the memory. “But he’s conscious, Danielle. He knows that he’s dying and that, at the rate his cells are degenerating, it’s going to be painful. More and more excruciating until his body gives out.”

“That’s terrible,” she lamented, stroking her thumb in short arcs over the apple of his cheek. “I can’t imagine what it was like to deliver that sort of news…”

“I’m going to have to kill him, Danielle,” he croaks hoarsely, fingers gripping her flesh a little tighter. “I’m going to have to be a murderer all over again…”

“Leonard McCoy,” Danielle quickly cut him off, “you are a lot of things. Brilliant and compassionate, maybe a bit grumpy without your morning coffee. But you are _not_ a murderer.”

“I killed my father.”

The words lingered in the air, thick as a marsh.

“What?”

Leonard took a breath and closed his eyes to repeat his statement. “I killed my father. Pyrrhoneuritis. Incurable at the time,” he elaborated. “He begged me for weeks to end his life and I pleaded with him to hang on just a little longer.” When he opened his eyes, they were watery and red. “But he was in so much pain, Danielle… and then I- I couldn’t deny him anymore.”

Danielle cradled the back of his head as he buried his face in her shoulder, the other arm remaining wrapped around his body to hold Leonard close as he completely broke down.

McCoy was the sturdiest soul that she knew. In a crisis, he never gave into panic, never indulged his aviophobia. He had steady hands and quick reflexes, a brain that sprung into action when someone’s life was on the line. She’d never considered him to be an emotional person, though, she shouldn’t have been surprised to find a hidden depth that he very infrequently showed. After all, she had been on the receiving end of much of his concealed charm and affection over the course of the past six months.

But this… this was _different_. Danielle understood that everyone had bad and good days, even this _bad_ of a day, but she never believed that Leonard McCoy was one of them.

“Leo,” she addressed him softly as her fingers carded through the fine, damp hairs at the nape of his neck. “I can’t imagine how difficult that was for you. It takes a certain kind of person to have that kind of mercy, knowing you’ll have to live with the consequences… and I don’t know if I’ll ever have strength to make the same decision if I’m faced with it.”

Leonard stiffened in her grasp. “Dammit!” he snapped, tearing himself from her arms to push into the depths of his quarters.

The soggy air weighed down on the blonde as she remained frozen in the bathroom, still feeling the throb from where his arm had roughly jostled her shoulder. In the mirror, she could see him hastily pulling on a pair of lounge pants and dropping down into a perch on the edge of the bed. He bent to rest his elbows on his knees, lacing his hands together behind his head.

“I’m sorry,” she called to the doctor delicately as she turned around in the doorway. “I didn’t mean to upset you, I swear.” Danielle took slow steps towards where he sat and sunk down onto her knees in front of him. She reached to cover his hands with hers. “I’m here, Leo. I’m _here_.”

His persistent silence worried her, but the gentle brush of his fingers over her own a few minutes later gave her hope that he hadn’t completely toppled over the edge just yet.

“Part of the reason I left Georgia was to escape the ghost of my father,” he stated weakly. “He’s in every corner of my parents’ house and I- I couldn’t stay there anymore knowing I was the reason I’d never hear his footsteps down the hall again.” Leonard wrapped his fingers around hers and shifted so that their joined hands rested in front of him. “It seeped into every aspect of my marriage… drove my wife into the arms of another man. I couldn’t even look at my own daughter without-“

His voice broke and he swallowed harshly, trying to inhale steadying breaths.

“Joanna has his eyes,” Leonard croaked suddenly, eyes stinging with tears once more. “His smile, too. She’s the only part of my father, the only good thing in my life that I have left and I’m not even allowed to see her.”

“You have plenty of good things in your life, Leonard,” Danielle insisted, grazing her thumb over his knuckles. “You are the Chief Medical Officer of Starfleet’s flagship, which is a pretty big deal. You’ve got Jim, you’ve got me… and you’re a damn good doctor…”

He snorted derisively. “Good doctors don’t intentionally end the lives of two of their patients.”

“You know what makes you a good doctor, Leo?” Blake posited quietly. “You don’t just care about patients, you _live_ for your patients. The fact that you’ve been a doctor for ten years and when things go badly, you still take it incredibly hard… I wish that all doctors, _not_ just Starfleet doctors, were more like _you_.” She gave his hands a small squeeze. “And good doctors, good _men_ ,” Danielle continued, dipping her head to hold Leonard’s gaze as one hand untangled from his to cup his cheek, “get to see their daughters.”

Leonard swallowed, taking a few moments to collect his thoughts before he looked back into her eyes. His lips parted as though to speak, but when the words didn’t come, he merely nodded weakly.

“Is there-“ She stroked her thumb along his jaw. “Is there anything I can get you?” she asked quietly, knowing he likely hadn’t eaten dinner, or even lunch for that matter. There was also the issue of the liquor cabinet on the other side of the room, but she did not dare to mention it on the off chance it had escaped his mind.

“N-no,” he finally managed to answer, albeit shakily. “I think…” He inhaled a deep breath. “I just need to try and sleep.”

Danielle nodded this time and rose to her boots. Her fingers slipped from Leonard’s and the hand on his face shifted to rest on his shoulder. “I’ll leave if you want,” she whispered, studying his face. “I know I wasn’t exactly supposed to be here in the first place-“

Her words were cut off by the strong grip of Leonard’s hands on her hips. “No, don’t!” he barked suddenly, catching her entirely by surprise. She blinked a few times, at which point he ducked his head sheepishly. “Please?” he murmured, looking up at her with pleading eyes.

“I’ll stay. Don’t worry,” she assured him, momentarily escaping from his grasp to unzip her boots. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Thank you,” he said softly while he intently watched every move she made. He shuffled to take a seat back against the headboard, pulling his knees up to his chest.

Danielle turned to find his new position after peeling the shoes from her feet, offering him a gentle smile. “You’re welcome.” She carefully crawled into the bed beside him with little regard for the fact that her uniform would be a crumpled mess in the morning. “You can always come to me, okay?” She settled in beside him so that their shoulders were resting together, her fingers extending to thread with his. “When you need someone to talk to- not just when-“ Danielle paused, cheeks flushing. “Well, you know.”

“I know.” He turned his head to look at her beside him. “At least… I know now.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I think so,” she answered, chewing the inside of her cheek. “It’s a nice place to come back to when we’re on leave, but truthfully…” she trailed off as her apartment building loomed. “The Enterprise is my home now. This is just my second home, my Earth home.”
> 
> “Makes sense, but it’s home. A place to look forward to back on Earth.” The look of longing on his face didn’t go unnoticed. “Almost seems like just another planet without one.”

Two months later, Leonard was given the chance to see his daughter again for the first time in four years. During his time at the Academy and commission on board the Enterprise, he’d been relegated to a weekly phone call and a monthly video call. The latter was the only reason that he’d been able to see her grow up the past few years at all.

Jocelyn and her fiancé, Clay, were scheduled to attend the opening night reception for a well-known artist at a San Francisco gallery. With no one to watch Joanna for an extended stay back in Georgia, they’d been forced to bring her along.

McCoy was well aware that their only reason for asking him to attend was so that they didn’t have to worry about keeping an eye on the little girl, but who was he to look a gift horse in the mouth?

Everything had been going fine until Jo decided to slip out of the building because she was bored and it turned into a long walk through the local park once her father caught up with her. A shrieking Jocelyn, angered by their sudden disappearance, quickly cut what had been a glorious hour of uninterrupted Daddy-daughter time short.

Before he could fully process what was happening, his ex-wife stomped off with Joanna, her cries becoming softer and softer until they disappeared altogether.

Ninety minutes after the best hour of his entire year, Leonard was sitting on the side of a dusty road near the Academy dorms, a thin coating of rust-colored grit on his suit.

“Leo?” a voice called softly as footsteps neared and he looked up into the face of Danielle Blake, kneeling beside him.

“Hey,” he replied hoarsely, running a hand over his face.

“What are you doing on the side of the road?” She sank down beside him, pulling her leather jacket around her body a little tighter to fend off the brisk sea air. “This seems like a waste of a perfectly fine suit, especially one you look so handsome in,” she added, nudging his leg with her knee.

“Think it’s outlived its usefulness.”

She angled her body towards Leonard to brush some dirt off of his arm. “There’s a great dry cleaner a few blocks from my apartment. I’ll take it there and it’ll be good as new.” She gently squeezed his shoulder. “Every man needs a good suit, Leo.”

Danielle let the silence linger for a few moments, striving to come up with something to say that wouldn’t further depress the man. She knew that he had plans with Jocelyn to see Joanna. After all, he hadn’t shut up about them for weeks.

Considering his state, it was safe to assume they hadn’t gone well.

“Were you headed back to your hotel?”

“I was just wandering,” he admitted with a tilt of his head, lifting his shoulders into a shrug. “Didn’t know what to do with myself and I guess my feet just carried me here. Seemed like as good a place as any, I suppose.”

“Well, if you’re looking for something to do…” Danielle stood to dust off her jeans and extended a hand to him. She wasn’t about to let him just sit there for hours, realizing that’s exactly what he was prepared to do. “You can walk me home. I’ll call you a cab once we get back to my place.”

His breathing had slowed to a more normal pace since the scientist first found him, giving her the slightest reassurance that he was calming down a bit. He accepted her hand, kissing it appreciatively before standing up.

“I can do that,” Leonard affirmed. He didn’t relinquish his gentle grasp. Instead, much to her surprise, he laced their fingers together.

She overcame her momentary shock to speak again, though the creeping blush persisted. “My hero…” Danielle laughed gently, starting to take a few steps down the road. “My apartment isn’t too far from here. I guess I naturally gravitated towards Starfleet HQ and the Academy.” She lifted her shoulders in a small shrug. “Not as nice as Jim’s place, I’m sure. But it’s home.”

“Better than nothing, isn’t it?” He tilted his head as he looked over.

A sick feeling twisted in her stomach. Based on the tone of his voice, the steely face he was displaying, Danielle knew that it was a self-deprecating comment. Leonard may not have owned or rented a home on Earth, relying on hotels, crashing with Jim, or staying back with his grandmother in Georgia when he was Earth-bound, but it didn’t mean he didn’t have a home.

“I think so,” she answered, chewing the inside of her cheek. “It’s a nice place to come back to when we’re on leave, but truthfully…” she trailed off as her apartment building loomed. “The Enterprise is my home now. This is just my second home, my _Earth_ home.”

“Makes sense, but it’s home. A place to look forward to back on Earth.” The look of longing on his face didn’t go unnoticed. “Almost seems like just another planet without one.”

“But it’s not.” Danielle gave his hand a small squeeze. “Your run-of-the-mill planet is nothing like this one, not for you.” She led him through the automatic entryway, shooting a smile at the security guard as he tipped his hat at her.

“I don’t have a home here, Danielle.”

“I don’t buy that for a minute, Leo.” She stopped at the elevator bank, blindly smacking at the call button while turning to face him. “When I was twelve, maybe thirteen, I was complaining to Pike that I felt more at home with him than I did with my own parents. And you know what he told me?”

Leonard grumbled, “Bet you’re about to tell me, aren’t you?”

“He told me,” Danielle spoke over his rumbles, “the Betazoids believe the concept of home does not refer to a building. That’s merely a dwelling, more commonly referred to as a house or an apartment in types.” She led him inside of the now-open lift and swiveled her body towards them. “Rather, _home_ is a feeling of safety and security, of affection and care and loyalty.” She relinquished her gentle grasp on his hand to tenderly cup his cheeks. “They firmly believe that ‘home’ is all about people, not places, Leo. And I do, too.”

The doctor stood there speechless. She could see his hazel eyes flicker, the gold flecks more prominent under the light of the elevator. It seemed as though he wanted to say something, was _willing_ himself to say something, but couldn’t. And once the doors re-opened on her floor, the moment was lost.

She let her hands fall to her sides and silently strode for her door, only a couple down from the elevators.

“You know…” Danielle began as she jimmied her key in the lock of the door, her back still towards Leonard. “You’re always welcome to stay with me when we’re back on Earth.” A small shove of her hand pushed the metal open. “I have a guest room and everything…” she added at a second thought in an attempt to avoid being presumptuous. “But of course, you’re more than welcome to share with me, as well. I only mentioned the guest rooms because-“ She sighed a bit, turning around. “I didn’t want you to think I was presuming anything. I certainly don’t mind sharing with you.”

She caught an unfamiliar glint in his eye, something- _playful, maybe_ \- lingering there. “Wouldn’t you now?”

At the sight of his smirk, Danielle smiled bashfully at him, moving for the closet to stow her jacket. “You know I never mind having you around, Leo.” She closed the smaller door and leaned against the wall for a moment. “And you can- you can stay tonight, if you want.” She managed to find his gaze again, trying to convey that her motivation wasn’t even remotely sexual. Rather, she knew that he was still reeling from everything that had occurred earlier in the night and thought general company might help lift his spirits. “I’m not suggesting anything, I just know that today wasn’t the greatest and if you didn’t want to go back to your hotel, I get it. You’re always welcome to stay with me, no matter the reason.”

“Danielle, I-“ Within seconds, a strong pair of arms wrapped around her, tightening against her body, and his momentarily cocky façade was gone. “ _Thank you_.”

The blonde rested her head on his strong shoulder, a bright smile etched onto her face while her hand rubbed soothingly in circles over his back.

Leonard was different from the other men she’d known and had any remote interest in. He wasn’t afraid to be open with her anymore, to let himself be vulnerable, even if their initial dialogue down this new path began over a desk in his office.

And it was something that made her feel warm all over, a warmth that lasted for days, even when he wasn’t around.

* * *

Thirty-five minutes, a change of clothes, and a cup of coffee later, Danielle rose from the couch and extended her hand to Leonard. "I think we’ve had a long enough day, so I’m going to call it a night and head to bed. You coming?”

“Mhmm.” He knocked back a large gulp of his coffee, grousing momentarily at its bitterness. He glanced down at the remaining dredges pooled at the bottom of the mug, setting it down with a huff. “I’ll wash it out in the morning,” he assured her as he stood, ignoring her hand in favor of slipping his arm around her waist.

“Don’t worry about it. That’s why humanity invented dishwashers.” Danielle offered him a smile while leaning into his touch, her own arm curling around his body. “I’m just happy to have someone to wake up to in this apartment for a change.” A slight blush crept up her cheeks. “I don’t mean that the way it- I just- um…” She took a deep breath as they walked through her open bedroom door and she parted from Leonard to find a change of clothes in her dresser. “Sorry. I guess… it’ll just be nice to be able to feel the sunlight in the morning, lay with you, and enjoy it, without having to worry about a shift. It’s pretty much the best case scenario,” she explained further, though her attention was fixated on the contents of the drawers.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for.” Leonard padded across the room and snaked his arms around her waist, lips pressing an affectionate kiss to the back of her neck. “You’re absolutely right.”

Danielle’s eyes fluttered closed and her stomach dropped. Sex hadn’t been what she was angling for when she’d invited him over and offered him a place to stay. Leo was her sole bedfellow, sure, but he was also one of her closest friends these days.

Sex wasn’t supposed to be a comfort or a way for them to seek solace. It was just supposed to be fun.

And if it came down to it, she was going to tell him as much and brace herself for rejection. Even if she’d grown to care about him far more than she would ever admit to anyone.

“Go ahead and get into bed,” she instructed gently, running her fingertips over one of his wrists. “I’ll join you in a minute.”

Blake could feel him nod into her shoulder and depart for the bed, but not before kissing her cheek. She stood there momentarily, still able to feel his lips on her skin as she lingered, clutching the clothing in her hands. She couldn’t pinpoint why the contact was affecting her so greatly and the notion was disconcerting.

Though, she eventually brushed it off and headed into the bathroom. Danielle wasn’t concerned about changing in front of Leonard, but she did want to go through her pre-bed routine of washing her face, brushing her teeth, and relieving her bladder. It was plenty convenient just to change in there, as well.

By the time she returned in her shorts and slightly baggy tee shirt, Leonard was already in bed. It was readily apparent that he was bare-chested, leading her to wonder whether he was wearing anything at all.

“Thanks for asking me to stay,” Leo acknowledged graciously while stretching his arms over his head, muscles rippling deliciously under the strain.

“Like I said before…” Danielle waved off his gratitude, and mentally, his damn physique, as she pulled back the covers, noting in a split-second that he did, in fact, have his boxers on. “You’re welcome here anytime.”

“Be careful or I might just take you up on that offer, Danielle,” he cautioned with a teasing edge to his voice.

Her green eyes simply rolled in response. She slipped into the bed and curled onto her side, head propped up by her arm. “If I didn’t want you to take me up on that offer, I wouldn’t have mentioned it in the first place,” she pointed out. “Now isn’t that some Vulcan logic for you?”

“Shut up,” Leonard groused in response, but couldn’t hide the tiny quirk of one corner of his mouth. He shuffled closer to her body and reached over the top of her pillow to slide his arm just above her bent elbow. “C’mere…” The limb swept forward to draw her closer and bring her body to press up against his. Danielle’s limbs instinctively tangled with his, the natural inclination to do so enough to scare her.

Then again, a lot of their repeat performances seemed to start similarly. And that was something the blonde was adamant was off the table tonight to maintain her dignity.

She was just about to open her mouth to speak to the subject when Leonard rolled their enjoined bodies just enough to allow him to rest his cheek against her shoulder.

“I don’t know why someone as smart and beautiful as you has lowered her standards to my level,” Leonard began, tilting his head just enough to look at her. “But I’m continually and immeasurably grateful that you have.”

Overwhelmed by the need to simultaneously refute his claims and comfort the doctor, she wrapped her left arm around his body and stroked his cheek with her right thumb. “I didn’t have to lower my standards for you,” she assured him in a gentle tone. “You are so astoundingly brilliant, Leonard. I wish more people possessed your compassion for not just humanity, but for every species. Why is it that you can’t believe me when I tell you what a _good_ , _honest_ man you are?”

“Because five years ago, a judge told me I _wasn’t_.” His eyes were suddenly filled with a sadness and longing that she had never seen in them before. “He told my daughter that I was unworthy of being her father, that she deserved a better one. Deserved Clay, not me.”

“No,” she asserted. “All that decision proved is that you were divorcing a woman from a well-connected family because no other judge would have allowed such an injustice to occur in his or her courtroom.” She dipped her head to rest their foreheads together. “Leo, if my father had loved me a tenth of the amount I know you love Joanna, I wouldn’t be so fucked up.”

“You are _not_ fucked up.” His slightly rough palm slid along her soft cheek. “Poor taste in men, maybe. But my god, do you know how many men would kill to be in my position? Often literally, might I add?”

_I wouldn’t trade whatever this is that we have for any one of them._

“Oh, I’m _royally_ fucked up, Leo. My Daddy issues could employ a team of psychologists for _years_.”

“So could mine. Guess we’re quite a pair, huh?”

“Yeah.” Her lips curved into the tiniest of smiles. “I guess we are.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This wasn’t a breakfast that fell under the blanket of a post-coital high, just a meal shared between close friends, one of whom had spent the night after a particularly difficult day.

Despite the intentions she voiced the night before, Danielle didn’t linger in bed until Leonard awoke. She’d basked in the glow of the sun and the warmth of his enveloping body until the clock beside her bed registered 8:00am. Then she showered, dressed, and scribbled out a note explaining that she’d be back soon.

The first stop on her short errands run was the convenience store on the corner. While Danielle knew that her refrigerator was stocked with eggs, milk, and a few other staples, she’d used up the last bit of her coffee the previous evening. Aside from her own reliance on the bitter liquid, Leonard was just as dependent, if not more so, and she would be a poor hostess if it were suspiciously absent from the breakfast table.

After a quick jaunt to the Quickie Mart, the next errand on her list required a trip to the cleaners. At the sight of the soiled suit, the woman behind the counter had given her a wince, physically pained by the state of the beautifully-tailored attire, and an assurance they’d have it looking as good as new again by the following Saturday.

The last stopover was the bakery six blocks west of her apartment. There was a closer one only a half block away, but it wasn’t nearly as good and didn’t have peach muffins like the other. She figured that even if it wasn’t traditional southern food, Leonard wouldn’t mind a little taste of home.

Armed with three bags of groceries, Danielle arrived at her apartment only an hour after she had departed. Though, McCoy was still fast asleep. After a stressful and disappointing evening, the scientist wasn’t all that surprised.

Once she had put away the contents of the canvas bags, she started up a pot of coffee and got to work on breakfast. As it turned out, the CMO wasn’t just dependent on the liquid, but could be charmed out of the bedroom by brewing coffee like a snake in a basket and a well-played flute.

“Mornin’,” a slightly hoarse voice greeted her.

“Good morning.” She smiled at him over her shoulder and marveled at how Leonard looked even more attractive in the morning with his hair askew. “I hope I didn’t wake you when I left. You sleep alright?”

“Mhmm.” He yawned, but covered his mouth. “I’ll be honest. I was wonderin’ if you snuck out of your own apartment to avoid an awkward morning.”

Danielle shook her head. “The only awkwardness I avoided was a lack of coffee, considering we polished off the remainder of what I had last night,” she explained with a small laugh. “Don’t worry. Catastrophe averted.” She inclined her head towards the appliance on her counter.

“Oh, I’m well aware,” he assured her with a derisive snort, padding further into the kitchen to lean his hips against the counter beside her. “I could smell a good cup of joe a mile away.” He tapped the tip of his nose for added effect.

“Duly noted.” She dipped her head marginally while whisking eggs in a bowl. “There are some pastries on the table. I specifically picked up a few peach muffins that you _have_ to try. They’re no peach cobbler, but they’re still fantastic. Not even the tastebuds of a true Georgian can deny that.”

“Really now?” He cocked an eyebrow at her. “Guess we’ll have to test that theory. Lucky for you, you’ve got a born and raised Georgian in your kitchen.”

“Well, what do you know?” she returned playfully, clicking on the burner beneath a waiting pan on the stovetop. “I’ll tell you what I _don’t_ know. How you like your eggs in the morning.”

“Not from a replicator?” he offered. “Scrambled, fried, sunny side up, poached, or soft-boiled... really, I’m not picky. If you’re already scramblin’ some for yourself, you don’t have to do anything different from me. Besides…” A crooked grin cracked his lips. “I’m gettin’ to be an old man and my metabolism ain’t what it used to be.”

Danielle made a point to roll her eyes. “You’re an idiot.” She poured out the egg mixture into the hot pan, relishing the sizzle that cut through the air as she slid her gaze to him. “You’re thirty-two, not sixty-two.”

Leonard turned and took a solitary step closer, his outside arm lifting. Then he froze mid-second step, head ducked a fraction.

She did her best to study the action as surreptitiously as she could. The way he’d instinctively moved made it seem like he was about to something he’d done a hundred times before. Yet, sliding an arm around her waist and kissing her wasn’t on the table when they hadn’t had sex the prior evening. This wasn’t a breakfast that fell under the blanket of a post-coital high, just a meal shared between close friends, one of whom had spent the night after a particularly difficult day.

At least, that’s what it was supposed to be… _right_?

The blonde cleared her throat. “I have fresh bagels, too. A few different kinds, wasn’t sure what you liked.”

Leo looked… _relieved_ , almost. “Plain’s just fine. Mom used to make me cinnamon raisin with cream cheese on school days so I could take it on the bus with me. I got hooked on everything bagels in med school.”

“Uncle Chris always bought me an everything bagel with vegetable cream cheese when he took me to work with him in the summer. Go on then, take your pick.” She winked at him, turning back to prod at the eggs with a rubberized spatula. “Butter and cream cheese are in the fridge. Help yourself. Coffee’s almost ready.”

Sure enough, the man turned around to find a plate of the previously-referenced pastries on the kitchen table, along with what appeared to be a fruit bowl that held bagels, rather than produce. He spotted plain, cinnamon raisin, and everything in the bowl, along with a few other types that weren’t his cup of tea.

“You are _way_ too good to me, darlin’.” He shook his head and opened the refrigerator door. “Be careful though, you’re going to spoil me with your cooking and I’ll be extra unhappy once I’m forced to endure replicated food again.”

“I’m sure I can rig up something if it gets to be _too_ unbearable.”

He grinned at the notion and swiped one of the lauded muffins from the table. His hazel eyes studied it within his fingers, twisting the baked confection around in his grasp.

“Let me take you to dinner,” Leonard spoke up suddenly, eyes now trained on her.

She tampered down the butterflies whirling about in her stomach. He didn’t think about them that way, so there was no need to get overly excited.

_Get it together, Blake. It’s fun, remember? Just fun between two consenting adults friends. Nothing more._

“What, like a date?” Danielle snorted, trying to remain nonchalant and humorous to conceal her inclination.

He was silent for a few beats before he continued, “You’ve done so much for me in the past twenty-four hours alone, none of which you were obligated to do. And that’s not even taking into account everything else. I’d like to thank you for that.”

“You mean…” She bit her lip to fight off a smile. “It’s a thank you dinner for all the amazing sex?”

“No,” Leonard groused with narrowed eyes. Though, he corrected himself at the cock of her brow. “That’s not a no to the sex. I mean, the sex is _always_ thoroughly enjoyable. Great, actually.” He let out a frustrated huff. “Dinner… it’s a thank you for just… being here. I don’t- I don’t have anyone in my life I can be this open with.”

“You’ve got Jim, too,” she countered, giving the scrambled eggs another quick stir before turning off the burner. “You’re not as alone as you think, Leo.”

“Jim’s a great friend, don’t get me wrong. But last night, his answer to my problem would have been to get me wasted,” he remarked nonchalantly, taking it upon himself to pour them each a mug full of coffee. “And that was the last thing I needed. You- you opened your home and just stayed with me. I haven’t woken up next to someone in sunlight in…” He silently tallied a count in his head. “Six years.”

“You never know. Jim could be even more open-minded than we think he is…” she countered, trying to keep the mood light so that he didn’t revert back down the rabbit hole.

“I actually wouldn’t doubt it.” He took a small pull from his mug. “But seriously, Danielle. Let me take you to dinner. Tomorrow night. How about… six?”

She divided the eggs between a pair of plates on the counter, pushing more onto the dish made for Leonard, and pivoted to look at him. “Leo, it really isn’t necessary…”

“To me, it is,” he countered. “There’s this great Italian place right near the Academy. Jim took me there for my birthday and-“

“Alfonso’s,” she interrupted with a risen corner of her mouth. “I know it well. I even went on a date there once.”

“I promise you’ll have a better time,” Leonard assured her, gently grasping her elbow as she ditched the pan in the sink. “Come on, darlin’.”

She stared up at him, finally relenting with a small sigh. “Okay. Okay… I’ll go.”

“Six ‘o clock,” he reminded her, lifting their plates and carrying them to the table. “Don’t stand me up, alright?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

* * *

Thirty hours had passed since Leonard had departed her apartment to head back to his hotel in a cab. This time, however, Danielle was the one sitting in a taxi. And for some unidentifiable reason, _incredibly_ nervous.

It had been a long time since anyone had made her feel the way that Leonard McCoy did. She couldn’t help but feel genuinely happy around him, even when they weren’t in bed, and it wasn’t hard for her to just let loose and be herself. There wasn’t a need to keep an officer’s posture and disposition at all times.

They didn’t have to be Chief Medical Officer and Strategic Operations Officer. Rather, they could be Leo and Danielle and debate stupid things like whether Florida or California had better orange juice ( _California, clearly_ ), if Scotty was secretly distilling whiskey in his quarters ( _he was_ ), and whether Chekov had ever needed to shave a day in his young life ( _probably_ , despite Leo’s protests).

In the back of her mind, Danielle was constantly reminding herself that this was just a thank you, friendly dinner. There was no need to have spent three hours getting ready, nor was there a need for girlish anxiety.

Even if those jitters told her everything she needed to know.

At a few minutes past six ‘o clock, Danielle stepped out of the cab in a black knee-length sheath dress with a sweetheart neckline and small slit in the back to allow her to move a little more freely. She slipped inside of the door and glanced around, finding no sign of Leonard.

“Can I help you?” the host asked from behind his station, a kind smile plastered on his face.

“Oh, I’m meeting someone,” she replied politely, the curled bottom half of her hair bouncing slightly as she turned.

“Perhaps he has already arrived?” the man suggested, thumbing through his tablet. “Would the reservation be under his name?”

She scrunched her nose in thought for a moment. “Probably… Leonard McCoy?”

His thin lips spread into a wider smile. “Ahh, yes. You must be Miss Blake, then. Please follow me.”

She trailed the lanky man through the controlled chaos of the restaurant. It was bustling, tables brimming with food and drink, likely more copious than normal because it was a Friday night. She even spotted a few cadets on the far side of the room at a large table the owner maintained for anyone from the Academy, who were usually his most loyal customers (and ran up the highest alcohol tab).

When the host started to slow, Danielle averted her gaze to their path and her breath hitched in her throat when she noticed Leonard only a few feet away. The doctor was wearing a black sportcoat and matching slacks, with a white button-down that lacked a tie and the closure of the top three buttons.

His gaze slowly rose as they approached and he seemed to freeze as he laid eyes on her.

“Dr. McCoy, Miss Blake has arrived,” the host addressed him politely with a smile.

“ _Doctor_ Blake,” he corrected him nonchalantly as he pushed his chair back just enough to stand.

“My apologies, doctor…” he lamented, dipping his head a bit.

“No apologies necessary,” Danielle insisted, holding her hand up to wave off the notion. “It’s actually nice to be a regular person in a restaurant for a change, not awaiting impending doom in a mess hall,” she offered with a gentle chuckle.

When the host moved to pull out her chair, McCoy took a small step forward. “I’ll get it,” he remarked politely and with the man’s departure, focused all his attention on Danielle.

His eyes roamed over her outfit before he leaned over to kiss her cheek. “You look absolutely beautiful,” he complimented, a hand ghosting over her hip. “Not that you don’t always, but I’ve never seen you in anything other than your uniform or off-duty clothes. And none of them look like this.”

“Does wearing nothing count as anything?” Her lips curled playfully. “But look at you, Leo.” Her hands reached to smooth down his lapels. “One of these nights, I’m going to insist you wear this for me.”

“I’m already wearing it for you.” Leonard cleared his throat urgently. “Because we’re having dinner together,” he clarified.

“Y-yes. Of course.” She glanced down at her strappy heels.

His light touched disappeared with quick footsteps around her body to pull out a chair. “Please… sit.”

Danielle smoothed the black fabric beneath her thighs and gingerly lowered into the chair, smiling warmly at Leo as he soon took a seat in front of her. Unsure of where to start the conversation, she lifted her menu and let her eyes rake over the words.

Though, truthfully, they weren’t registering anymore than black blurs on the page. She had never been at a loss for words when it came to speaking to McCoy in a professional matter as CMO and SOO, nor when it came to the language used behind closed doors and wrapped up in bed sheets. Even emotional discussions in her living room or kitchen were fine. But this normal, mundane conversation- well, it was escaping her.

“Did you come here often when you were at the Academy?” she asked suddenly, trying to start _some_ form of dialogue.

“Oh yeah.” He leaned forward and pointed to the area where servers filled soft drinks, tucked away into a small alcove. “You see that spot over there, where that waitress is standing?” She turned her head to follow his gesture, then nodded. “And you see how the color of one wall is darker than all the others?”

Danielle squinted. “Yeah…”

“That’s because someone put Jim through it in the middle of our second year.”

“ _No._ ”

“ _Yes_.”

“I can’t believe I didn’t know that…” She shook her head, though amusement was evident on her soft features. “I guess I never saw the damage myself. I probably didn’t eat here once I enrolled until… the end of my first year.” She paused. “Did that _really_ happen?”

Leonard let out a bark of laughter. “I was standing two feet away when it did. Damn idiot’s ankle caught me in the shoulder as he flew by.” He rolled his eye and reached for his tumbler of whiskey. “Probably only painted the repaired wall and didn’t bother with the others, s’why it’s darker.”

“Well, aren’t you a regular Sherlock Holmes?”

“Does that make you my Watson?”

The blonde waved a hand at him while rolling her eyes. “Hardly. If anything, I’d be more of a Mrs. Hudson than anything. Jim’s your Watson, McCoy. Not me.”

“I’ll be sure to tell him you think so.” His eyes sparkled even in the dim light, a grin plastered across his features. “But now you’ve got me curious.”

Her eyebrows knit together. “About what? My literary preferences?”

“No.” He dipped forward a bit more. “If you’re a young Mrs. Hudson and Jim’s Watson… then who’s Spock?”

“Oh, that’s easy.” Danielle clasped her hands together and curved to match his position. “He’s Mycroft.”

* * *

The conversation flowed beautifully the rest of the evening with the awkwardness of the first few minutes effectively broken. It was an incredibly pleasant meal filled with stories and anecdotes, childhood tales and grown up adventures. They barely discussed work and when they did, it was only tangentially.

A small squabble _did_ ensue over the check. Leonard had insisted on paying for the full meal, while Danielle countered that she wanted to split the bill. They talked in circles for what seemed like hours, at least until McCoy insisted that going Dutch would not only shame him as a southern boy, but defeated the purpose of taking her out to dinner to show his appreciation.

In the end, it was logic that even a Vulcan would find compelling.

Once the bill was settled and a tip left behind, Leo escorted Danielle into the brisk night air. The temperature had dropped roughly ten degrees and the sea breeze wasn’t helping matters. In fact, it sent a chill rushing down the woman’s spine.

“Here…” Having noticed the shiver, Leonard slipped off his sport jacket and neatly draped it over her shoulders. “You know, for a woman who grew up in this climate, you don’t do well in this fall weather.”

“I used to be able to walk around in forty-five degree temps without a jacket,” she countered while cautiously pulling the fabric tighter around her upper body. “But after more than a year on the Enterprise, with self-regulating biometric thermostats built into our quarters, I became accustomed to the warmth.” Her mouth lifted as she looked over at him, in step beside her. “I think San Francisco is taking her revenge on me now.”

It perpetually amazed the doctor that she never failed to make him laugh. “Well, hopefully you’re a little warmer now.”

“I am. Thank you, Leo.” She smiled over at him genuinely. “Not just for the jacket, but for tonight as a whole. It was really nice.”

Leonard promptly groaned.

“ _What_?” Her eyebrows furrowed, creasing her forehead.

“Nice is what your grandmother says when you show her the frog you caught at the creek, _right before_ she tells you to put it back,” he lamented, slipping his hands into his pockets.

“I’ve never gone looking for frogs a day in my life.” She half-smiled at him. “But I can assure you I didn’t mean nice in that context. I meant what I said earlier, Leo. I like being a regular person enjoying a nice dinner with good company and no risk of having a hole blown into the side of my workplace-slash-residence.” Danielle’s gaze slid from the street ahead to the man beside her. “It was even better because the company in question was you.”

Leonard felt heat creep up his neck, but did his best to avoid drawing attention to it. “Well…”

“If your next sentence involves the word ‘shucks’, you’re going to have to explain to our captain that his SOO died from being overwhelmed by cuteness,” she teased with a nudge of her shoulder against his.

“It won’t,” he asserted, shifting his weight from foot to foot once they stopped at a corner. “Actually, I was going to say that I’d like to do this again sometime. If it was alright with you, of course.”

Danielle trained her gaze on him, eying Leonard with immense curiosity and a hint of bewilderment. After a few moments of silence, she decided on an answer. “Oh… yeah. It’d be nice to grab a bite or something when you’re in town.”

“No…” He shook his head, trying to regroup. “I mean, yes. That’d be fine. But I was thinking of a nice dinner or somethin’… maybe a bit more regularly than when I’m just in town.”

She studied him dubiously as the lights changed in the intersection, the crosswalk now clear. Yet, she paid no mind to the impending continuation of their journey. “Well, it would be nice to have more regular company in the mess for a change. I’d like that, too.”

McCoy pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger, obviously frustration. “That’s not what I meant either.”

“Then what is it that you _do_ mean, Leo?”

His face screwed up with exasperation before he was unable to hold his tongue anymore. “Damn it, Danielle!” he exclaimed in a half-growl. “You’re _killing me_ here.”

“Wait… what on _Earth_ are you talking about?”

Leonard ran a hand roughly through his hair then let out a deflated sigh. “I’m trying to ask you out, darlin,’” he finally confessed. “And it’s not going well at all.”

Danielle’s eyes widened as his statement washed over her. She’d never asked him not to sleep with other women. In fact, if he was, she preferred not to know. Somewhere along the line, Danielle Blake had become possessive when it came to Leonard McCoy. It wasn’t in an emotionally manipulative manner. But rather, she’d grown so attached to the CMO, she didn’t want to share, didn’t want to analyze what sharing him meant.

At an indiscernible point in time, Danielle had grown emotionally reliant upon Leonard. She couldn’t pinpoint the moment exactly, but it was present nonetheless.

She tried to keep her hope tempered. What would a brilliant, compassionate doctor want with a woman he already had in his bed without the emotional baggage? Was she _really_ the kind of woman he could picture introducing to his daughter or his grandmother?

“I just want to make sure I’m not reading this wrong,” she replied softly, now impervious to the chilling wind nipping at her bare legs. “What _exactly_ are you saying?”

Leonard took a deep breath and opened his eyes to stare into hers. Even in the moonlight, she could see the prominent gold flecks in his irises. “I’m saying that I haven’t been with anyone else since our first night together. And truthfully, the more I’ve gotten to know you and spend time with you, I’ve become incapable of thinking about anyone else the way I think about you.”

He let out a small breath. There was no going back from this once it was out, but there also wasn’t a way to cover up his admission. It was either go big or go home.

“I want all of it. The sex is fantastic and better than I ever could have dreamed of. But the nights we’re not together, that’s not what I miss,” he remarked as if it was the most plain and simple truth he knew. “I miss waking up to you in the morning… curling up together on the couch and watching holovids. Making dinner with you on my kitchen counter and stealing kisses between steps of a recipe.

“I don’t want to just be friends or friends with benefits or whatever the hell we’ve been up until this moment. I want to call you mine and for you to call me yours. I just…” Leonard took a few slow, hesitant steps forward and gently took her hands in his. “I want to be with you, Danielle Blake. In every sense of the word.”

Danielle looked down at their joined hands, where Leonard’s thumbs were stroking across her knuckles. She’d be hard-pressed to deny that there was a spark between her and the Chief Medical Officer, a sense of comfort and safety in his presence that she had never expected to feel around anyone.

For most of her life, she’d never felt like enough to make anyone stay. Not her father, not her mother. Not every friend that paraded in and out of her life. Yet, here was a man who genuinely wanted to be. It was hard to wrap her head around.

Danielle Blake didn’t love Leonard McCoy. Not yet, anyway. But in the depths of her soul, Danielle knew that not only was she capable of doing so, but she was already well on her way.

“Leo…” She looked back at him with a radiant smile that he’d never quite seen before, one that reached her eyes and completely lit up her face. “I’d really like that,” she agreed in a fond tone.

McCoy’s hazel eyes were alight with hope. “Yeah?”

She dipped her head and laughed. “ _Yeah_.”

“Okay.” He nodded abashedly, unsure of what to do next. “That’s- that’s good then.” Leonard blew out a breath. “Fair warning, I’m really out of practice when it comes to this.”

“Well…” Danielle bit her lip and took a step closer, slowly rising up on her toes. “I guess we’ll just have to practice with great frequency,” she whispered, leaning in closer.

A smirk curled at the corners of his mouth. “Should probably start now then.”

“I think that’s the best idea you’ve-“

Her words were swallowed by the press of his lips against hers. It was unlike any other kiss they’d previously shared, full of the optimism so ripe in most budding relationships. His lips moved slowly, purposefully over her own, full of intent to display his feelings without pushing her or fighting for control.

She’d never admit it aloud, but it was the best damn kiss Danielle Blake had experienced in the last decade.

“Stay with me tonight,” she breathed out suddenly against his lips. “You said you missed waking up next to me,” she pointed out, her forehead resting against his. “I’d be lying if I denied sharing the sentiment.” Her gaze flickered to his kiss-swollen flesh and back again. “Come home with me. The invitation from the other night still stands. Especially now.”

Leonard grinned back at her, tracing her jawline with his thumb. “I’ll have to stop by my hotel to pack some clothes. I don’t want to have to rely on that pair of sweatpants you stole from Jim.”

“I didn’t steal them and you _know_ that…” She narrowed her eyes at him.

“Yes, they were missorted. I know,” he finished for her, trying to contain his laughter. “Are my things going to be magically missorted, too?”

“Depends on how you think I look in your shirts.”

“Well, in that case…” He dipped his head for another sweet kiss. “I ‘m going to need to buy backups.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In his head, Leonard imagined himself shrugging. Right now, until either attempted to label it, they were somewhere in that realm of a relationship that was no longer casual. And that was more than enough for him.

The following morning, it was Leonard who awoke first this time in Danielle Blake’s apartment situated in the Fisherman’s Wharf district of San Francisco. Though he’d been initially hoping for a bright, sunny day, it appeared as though Mother Nature had other plans and the previous night’s wind was indicative of an oncoming rainstorm.

Yet, McCoy’s plans were still the same. Wake up next to the beautiful woman he’d grown so attached to in the past year?

He turned his head away from the window and was immediately met by a slight mess of golden curls that drew a large grin to his face. _Check_.

There was a part of him that wanted to slip out of bed and get started on breakfast. Maybe find a tray to bring it to her in bed. Or carry it in piece by piece if he had to. But he’d missed the chance to spend a morning in bed with her two days prior and he wasn’t about to do it again, especially now that they were…

He didn’t know how to finish the sentence. What were Danielle Blake and Leonard McCoy these days? Exclusive? Dating? Boyfriend and girlfriend?

In his head, Leonard imagined himself shrugging. Right now, until either attempted to label it, they were somewhere in that realm of a relationship that was no longer casual. And that was more than enough for him.

Last night had been vastly different than any one of their previous nights together. There was usually some form of preamble: dinner or a movie or some other relatively innocuous activity in which the air between them would naturally become charged with a sexual energy that inevitably lead to a roll in the sheets. Or multiple rolls in the sheets and other areas of his quarters, as it were.

It’d usually start fairly innocently with him kissing her neck while they were sprawled out on his couch to watch a holovid that was destined to remained unfinished or her tugging him close and into a tender kiss as he was making some Southern recipe he was determined to introduce her to.

Some nights, they worked themselves into such a frenzy that they couldn’t make it to the bed. He’d have her pinned beneath him on the sofa or bent over the kitchen counter. Once, they’d even rolled off said couch and just kept going with her on top, laughter tumbling from their lips until the rhythm of their hips replaced them with moans instead. _That_ was how palpable their sexual chemistry was.

Then last night happened.

The electricity between them was no less than usual, but rather than harnessing lightning in a bottle and running with it for as long as they could, Leonard and Danielle basked in it. While it only took mere minutes for them to move to the bedroom from the entry of her apartment, it took another hour before either lost a single item of clothing.

They sat at the edge of her bed, bodies turned towards each other, and just took their time. Their kisses were long and slow, not the mashing of lips and teeth and tongues that was a bit more common place, and their hands explored the planes of skin and muscles that lined their backs and arms and thighs. It wasn’t overtly sexual, but inherently arousing. Like they were discovering each other for the first time.

And perhaps, they were. Once Leonard had set his mind on undressing Danielle, he took her apart piece by piece, mapped out her warm flesh with his lips and tongue until he swore that he could pass any exam on her personal anatomy. Yet, he no longer felt the need to leave his marks all over her body, head filled with the chant of _mine mine mine_ , even though he had no right to claim such a thing. This time, she _was_ his and McCoy knew it in his bones. He had no need to prove it to anyone else.

He’d made a single exception for the spot of skin directly over her pulse point that currently had his rapt attention. But that was for his own slightly long-term enjoyment, as well as her immediate pleasure. Not to ward off anyone else.

“You’re staring,” a voice mumbled from the pillow and drew a rumbling laugh from deep within Leo’s chest. “It’s creepy.”

The man ran his skilled fingers through her hair to smooth some of her mane back into place. “How could I not?” he posited softly. “You’re beautiful. Even in the rain.”

Her voice was still muffled in her next reply, “So that’s what that tapping is.” After a small yawn, Danielle turned her head to press her cheek into the pillow and opened her eyes a marginal amount. She found Leonard gazing down at her, his eyes rife with affection and warmth. “It ruins any plans I had for us today. I wanted to really show you the city, the way I know it,” she lamented. “I wanted our first day as a thing to be special.”

“This _is_ special.” His thumb slipped to brush along the curve of her jaw. “I got to wake up with you and know that I can wrap my arm around your waist or touch the small of your back or kiss you whenever the urge strikes. That the window of opportunity doesn’t close after we get out of bed or one of us leaves. It just stays open.”

Danielle reached to curl her fingers around the back of his neck. “You’re right,” she whispered into the room awash with the gray light filtering in through the window. “This is special,” she agreed with a quirk at the corner of her mouth then applied a light pressure to his skin to draw him closer. Her lips found him nearly instantaneously, like they were magnetized to his. “Does this mean that I can be a little more honest with you than I used to be? About how I’m feeling, I mean.”

“Y-yeah.” Leonard swallowed hard. “ _Yes_.”

“Good,” she murmured into a second kiss. “Then I’m going to take this opportunity to tell you that I’m so grateful to have learned for myself what a kind, caring, and generally wonderful man you are. You have such a good heart, Leo. A genuine soul.” She smiled warmly at him. “And I just- you make me really happy.”

McCoy felt his heart hammering against his ribs, stomach flipping at the sincerity of her every word. He hadn’t ever expected his feelings to be returned, let alone with such aplomb. “You make me really happy, too.” He beamed with relief. “In every way, for the record.”

Danielle blushed at the immediate memory of the evening before. “Last night was incredible. Unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before.”

“There was no rush. I knew I could take my time without a shift in the morning and I wanted to show you how I felt while I had the chance.”

“Were you afraid I’d change my mind?” she asked, to which he bowed his head sheepishly. “Oh God, Leo… _no_.” Her hand slipped from his neck to caress his cheek. “What we had stopped being casual for me _months_ ago. I didn’t say anything because I was scared to lose you… that you would break off our arrangement. It would have devastated me.”

His eyebrows rose. “You really felt that way?”

She nodded. “I _still_ feel that way, just without the fear of losing you. Stop selling yourself short.”

The doctor shrugged his shoulders. “M’not worth much anymore.”

“ _Stop it_ ,” she commanded seriously, holding his gaze with dark green eyes. “I don’t care what Jocelyn told you or what the judge told you. You are responsible for the health of over eight hundred people and countless others we encounter on missions. You are one of the major reasons that my godfather is still alive and kicking Jim’s ass across the galaxy. I know how long you spent with him open on your operating table.” She took a moment to study the gold flecks in his green irises. “And aside from him, you, Leonard McCoy, are the only man to ever think I was enough to actually want to stay in my life.” She brushed a few strands of hair away from his forehead. “You’re worth a hell of a lot to every single person on this ship, especially me.”

Leonard closed his eyes and nuzzled into her hand. Danielle’s touch was so soft and held such reverence that it stirred his very soul. “How were you right under my nose all these years and I never noticed?”

“Because I was a lowly underclassman,” she retorted with a teasing edge to her voice. “We barely crossed paths until Nero. You wouldn’t have even known my name until then. I did a decent job staying out of medical. The few times I was in, I had to ask Puri to treat me when the other cadets were too nervous because of my father.”

“And what was my excuse after that… in the time leading up to our commissions?” he muttered.

“I didn’t have my bunny costume on,” she mused simply, finding satisfaction in the smile that cracked his face. “There’s my Leo.” Her lips connected with the corner of his mouth.

Leonard was slightly startled by her words. They’d been in an actual, official relationship for less than sixteen hours and she was already nonchalantly referring to the CMO possessively. Perhaps there was something to it. Maybe he was hers all along.

“Just tell me you didn’t throw it away,” he pleaded, dipping to run his nose alongside hers.

Danielle couldn’t fight her amusement. “I didn’t,” she laughed. “I figured that I would save it for a special occasion. And before you even head down that path of thought, it’s _not_ here.”

“It’s okay.” His arm snaked around her body, hand splaying over the small of her naked back. “I think that you in no clothes is my favorite look of all.”

“Really now?” Danielle laughed, carding her fingers through the hair just above his ear. “Well, in that case, I suggest we go do something that we’ve never done together thus far.”

“I’m listening…”

“Let’s grab a nice, hot shower,” she suggested, an almost dreamy look on her face. “Those sonic ones on the ship aren’t exactly designed for two people, so it doesn’t surprise me that we never wanted to take one together. Plus… I don’t know. There’s something about vibrating dirt and grime that’s fairly far from enticing.”

“I could get behind that idea…” Leo nodded slowly. Then his lips twisted into a devilish grin and he shifted to lightly trail kisses around the mark he’d left on her neck. “And _you_ ,” he tacked on in a thick murmur. “I hope your building has a reliable hot water heater.”

“Top of the line,” she assured him breathlessly.

“Good.” He pulled back with a flash of teeth beneath his parted lips. “We’re gonna need it. I’m much happier using your shower anyway, as opposed to a hotel one. I don’t trust housekeeping. Hell,” his inflection was punctuated with a grimace. “I have half a mind to bring a UV wand with me. I need to be drunk to get into one of those things.”

“It’s why you checked out two weeks early,” she hummed, tracing the ridges of his shoulder muscles with her index finger.

“No. _You’re_ why I checked out early, darlin’. The shower’s just an added bonus.”

Danielle smiled bashfully. “Want to go try it out?”

“It might actually be the only thing that can tempt me out of this bed with you at the moment. I’m going to get my kit out of my suitcase. Morning breath and all that.”

“I was planning on brushing my teeth too.” She stretched her arms over her head, groaning mildly as her joints cracked and popped to her liking. “Don’t worry about soaps and shampoos. I, ah… after you left the other night, I went out and bought some in the hopes you’d take me up on my offer.”

“ _My God_ , woman…” Leonard groaned. “Go get in that shower before I decide not to let you leave this bed.”

Danielle shimmied out from beneath him and gave him her best salute. “Yes, sir, Doctor McCoy, sir.” And with a wink over her shoulder, she departed for the bathroom, with Leo craning his head to watch her until the last possible moment.

Leonard rolled out of the bed and reached for the high ceiling above him, elongating his spine. He knew that he wasn’t a kid anymore, wasn’t the young man who had enjoyed weekends between the sheets with his equally young wife to celebrate the end of finals or the passing of his boards. His joints crackled more often than he cared to admit and worry lines crinkled his forehead.

Yet, Leonard couldn’t remember a time in recent memory where he’d felt so alive or so invigorated. And the more he thought about it, the more he was convinced that the feeling was from a totality of the circumstances.

Truthfully, he hadn’t initially known just how different Danielle was when they’d first fallen into bed together. Or rather, onto his desk in Medbay. It had taken him hours to work up the courage to so much as message her the following day to tell her how much he’d enjoyed himself and wanted to invite her to spend the night sometime again, but took another ninety minutes to craft the words that would make him seem more like a charming bedfellow and less like a horny frat boy.

It wasn’t until Leonard had the opportunity to spend time with her away from the bedroom that he’d _really_ gotten to know Danielle Blake for the smart, kind, and sincere woman she was. Though, it was shortly after she found out about the circumstances surrounding his father’s death that McCoy realized they’d fallen into somewhat couple-like behavior. And in the course of that realization, came another that hit him like a ton of bricks: the doctor was subconsciously courting her.

It was written all over everything Leonard did: the dinners he made to impress her, the movies he proffered to be able to sidle up to her on the couch. Not to mention the fact that he’d increasingly been turning to her during times of emotional conflict. In Leo’s mind, Danielle wasn’t just a friend or a lover anymore. Blake was his romantic partner.

The notion scared the living _hell_ out of him. He had no right to feel that way, to assert any sort of claim to her. Their arrangement was casual, with the unspoken agreement that if either found a person to bestow upon their affections, it would be over between them.

Suddenly, McCoy found himself overscrutinizing. Every laugh she shared with a crew member had him speculating, any time she politely declined plans with him in favor of another obligation she’d already committed to made him worry that he was losing her.

He’d already known for a while that he would have to own up to his feelings or risk losing her because of his inaction and he wasn’t sure that could live with another major regret when it was a miracle he had developed a romantic interest in _anyone_ after his divorce.

It had already been a year since his marriage had disintegrated into nothing but pain and misery when he’d enrolled in Starfleet Academy. And the more time elapsed, the more he threw himself into his studies, and later his job, and figured that his chance at a happily ever after with a wife and a family had passed him by.

Six years later, when an opportunity to at least cultivate some form of happiness came around again, Leonard McCoy would be damned if he let it elude him another time.

Sometime down the road, when the scientist had stumbled upon him the night his visitation with Joanna had gone to absolute shit, and she opened her arms and her home to him, he knew he couldn’t risk her slipping away any longer. In fact, the evening had given him an inadvertently golden opportunity he wouldn’t squander.

And now, here he was… carrying his shaving kit into a bathroom where a beautiful woman swathed in purple satin was brushing her teeth and gazing at him in the mirror like the sun itself had just risen in her doorway. It was enough to make him want to stab himself with a hypo just to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

“Now I _know_ you left that robe behind in San Francisco,” Leo drawled as he stood at the other sink and placed the small bag onto the vanity. “And I’m so damn glad you did.”

Her mouth foamy, Danielle proceeded to garble some sort of reply that sounded like a mouth full of vowels and drew a bark of laughter from the CMO.

 _“What_?”

She blushed and rinsed out her mouth. “ _Stop it_ …”

“I most certainly will not,” he countered while loading up his own toothbrush with paste. Upon looking at his reflection, McCoy realized he was grinning. “We’re like a couple of goddamn sixteen year olds…”

Blake dabbed daintily at her lips with a washcloth and Leonard couldn’t help but find amusement in how drastically the action contrasted with the positively lascivious words that had tumbled from them the night before. “Does that make you the cute boy in my physics class?”

“That’s not true,” he insisted around a mouth of foam. “I know for a fact that by the time you were sixteen, you were already taking advanced biochemical courses at Stanford. But I do agree that I am the cute boy.”

“Shut up.” She nudged her satin-covered elbow into his bare arm as he rinsed, then pivoted to turn on the shower.

“I will…” Leonard looked on as she tested the water with her fingers and once satisfied with its temperature, shed the robe from her body to pool on the floor. “But only if you make me.”

Danielle stepped directly under the spray and Leo could feel himself salivate as he watched the steady stream of water run along her curves. He couldn’t even recall a time Jocelyn had turned him on in such a way.

“I don’t know how good I am at shutting you up,” she admitted while slicking back her hair. “I _am_ , however, exceptional at making you moan,” she countered as she slowly rotated to face him. “I think the past eight months have taught us as much.”

“That is true,” he acknowledged with a cock of his head. “And I think we like that scenario better.”

“Maybe that’s the problem.” She crooked her index finger at him. “We’re both fairly _loud_ individuals.”

Leo licked his lips and accepted her silent invitation, stepping into the shower with more than enough room for two people before closing the glass door behind him. “I don’t see how that’s necessarily a problem.”

She took a large step back to accommodate him, then one forward to draw closer to his drenched body. “Me either. So I take it back.”

“Good.” Leonard smoothed back his hair to have a clearer view of the woman before him. “I take it back, too.”

“You didn’t even _say_ it.”

“I don’t care.” His eyes fell to her lips, flicked up to her bright emerald eyes, and then dropped once more to their original point of origin. “All I can fucking think about right now is how much I want to kiss that pretty little mouth of yours.”

Danielle didn’t even bother to suppress her grin. “Oh, I’m so fucked with you, aren’t I?”

“Have been… but not yet today,” he refuted with a smirk playing at the edges of his own mouth and ran his strong hands along her damp curves until they came to cover a large portion of her spine.

“Dear God… I’m barely able to stand upright after last night.”

“Did I-“ Leonard felt his stomach twist sickeningly. “Did I hurt you?”

“No!” she quickly insisted and the vice on his intestines relented. “God no, Leo. I enjoyed myself. A _lot_.” Danielle grazed her fingers along his cheek, fondness evident in her bright gaze. “You just have this _unbelievable_ habit of knowing exactly what to do to turn me into jelly in bed. I haven’t entirely resolidified yet and I’d be a _bit_ embarrassed if I fell over in the middle…”

“I’d never let you fall,” he whispered affectionately against her lips, the words weighted with something more than what appeared on the surface.

“I know,” she returned with a tender brush of her hand over his neck. Silence lingered between them for a moment as they stood there with rivulets of water mingling between their intertwined bodies. Until Danielle’s voice broke through. “So from a purely scientific curiosity…” Her tongue darted out to whet her bottom lip. “How _would_ you make sure I didn’t fall in the shower?”

A cocksure grin twisted at his lips. "A lot of ways. Right now, from a strictly scientific perspective?"

"Of course," Danielle reiterated with a slight purse of her lips and a nod.

Leonard ran his fingers once through her hair. "I'd take you up against the wall," he told her in a dangerously low voice.

Her teeth dragged over her kiss-swollen flesh as her eyes darted around the three tile planes. “Which wall?”

Leo slowly walked her backwards until her shoulder blades connected with the cool ceramic. “ _This_ wall.”

“Mm.” Her fingernails danced across the fine hairs at the nape of his neck. “So that would keep me from falling backwards. But what about my legs giving out?” she crooned in a sultry tone.

“Easy,” he growled and reached down to hike one leg up around his hip, followed by the other. The latter action caused a surge of arousal to shoot straight to his groin, the resultant friction drawing an immediate groan from Leonard and a hiss from Danielle. “Keep them wrapped around me.”

Danielle swallowed hard. “A-and then?”

Leo dipped his head to lick a stripe from the hollow of her throat to her ear, the tip of his tongue curling to flick the lobe. “How about we find out?”

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Danielle’s face was buried in the divot in Leonard’s shoulder, chest heaving as her heart rate started to even out in the afterglow. “Best… scientific... experiment… _ever_.”

Leonard’s laugh came from deep with in his abdomen. “Do me a favor?”

She lifted her head to look at him. “Anything.”

He tipped his head forward to enjoin their lips, parting a moment later with a light smack. “Don’t share your findings.”

“Baby, you’re all _mine_ ,” she growled, fingers digging into his neck to force his mouth back to hers. The possessive nature of her words sent a shudder down his spine. “No one gets to know the results of anything we try in bed… or out of it… but you and me.”

Leo grit his teeth and closed his eyes. “If I wasn’t afraid you’d be walking funny for days, I’d have you one more time. _Right now_.”

“Your refractory period can _not_ be that quick.”

“I never said it’d be right away,” he clarified, his voice rough like gravel. “I have many ways to bide my time.”

A groan tore from her lips. “Oh my God. _Leo_.”

“What?” He grinned, nipping at her lower lip.

“You’re gonna be the death of me,” she murmured in reply.

“You have to admit it’s not a bad way to go.”

Danielle snorted. “It’s not even a debate worth having. However, all of this… _cardio_ has worked up my appetite.” She nuzzled the side of her nose against his. “How about you set me down, so we can both get cleaned up and I can make us breakfast?”

“Mmm… as much as I’ll enjoy watching you cook for a change, you sure you’re okay to stand?” He cocked an eyebrow at the blonde.

“I think you can set me down now,” she opined, giving him a look of encouragement.

Leonard relented and slowly assisted her in unfurling her legs from around his hips. “Easy…”

Danielle tentatively stood on the balls of her feet, cautiously lowering until she was flatfooted. She smiled triumphantly up at Leonard. “See? Fine?”

He made a point to roll her eyes at him, swiveling in search of a bottle of shampoo or body wash. Whichever he found first, really.

What he failed to notice, however, was the fact that her smile rapidly started to dissipate as her calves started to spasm. Her back started to slide down the wet tile, a squeaking noise cutting through the air. Leo turned back with alarm to find Danielle sitting on the shower floor as the water rained down on her.

“Darlin’?” He swiftly scurried to his knees beside her, unnerved by the gasps of air she was struggling to inhale, face buried in her hands. “Darlin’, _talk to me_.” She lifted her head and Leonard felt relief course through his veins. She wasn’t crying; she wasn’t hurt.

She was _laughing_.

“Oh my God, Leo…” Danielle choked out, wiping tears from her eyes. “You missed it. I just went down like a limp noodle!” she wheezed.

Leonard grumbled as he sat down beside her and leaned against the wall so their bodies were flush from thigh to shoulder. He stared at her in puzzlement for a brief moment before his confusion tapered off, substituted by matching laughter.

And as he found his whole body shaking from the ridiculous ordeal, the wisdom his grandfather once relayed to Leo in his teenager years echoed in his brain: ‘ _If you can’t laugh during sex, you might not be doing it with the right person.’_


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She leaned her body a little so that he could have a better look at what she’d been up to when he’d entered. In the pan sat two heart-shaped cookie cutters, eggs frying within its metal borders.
> 
> His eyes lit up. “If you get any cuter, I might actually throw up.”

Leonard McCoy was getting to be highly spoiled.

For the third morning in a row, he had woken up next to a gorgeous blonde who by the grace of some omnipotent being, relished in bearing the title of his girlfriend. In fact, said angel had been halfway out of bed when he’d awoken, but spared a moment to turn back just for him. She caressed his cheek and gave him a slow, but satisfying kiss with the instruction to go back to sleep and catch a few more hours while she showered and made breakfast.

It was difficult to fight off the urge to slip out from the covers and join her once he heard the water plinking off the ceramic tiles, but the fact that he could shift a few inches to his right and find himself enveloped in the scent of her perfume made it easier for him to burrow back into the sheets.

The tinkling of piano keys finally roused him, bleary hazel eyes registering a time shortly after 10am. He peeled himself out of bed and padded into the wide open floor plan of the apartment’s main room, which housed the kitchen, dining room, and den all in one contiguous space. As the music grew louder, though never beyond a decibel he’d consider to be ‘soft’, he was able to make out the accompanying gentle hum that undoubtedly belonged to a woman.

Danielle’s damp hair was slung over her shoulder in a fishtail braid, tongue pressed between her lips in concentration as she meticulously fiddled with something in a frying pan.

Taking her relaxed brow as a sign her most difficult task was finished, Leo wound his arms around her waist. “What culinary delight does my beautiful girlfriend have in store for me today?”

She leaned her body a little so that he could have a better look at what she’d been up to when he’d entered. In the pan sat two heart-shaped cookie cutters, eggs frying within its metal borders.

His eyes lit up. “If you get any cuter, I might actually throw up.”

Danielle reached across the stove to lift up a slice of bread for his benefit. A matching heart shape had been cut out from the center, presumably turning the future piece of toast into a holder for the fried egg. “I’m barefoot, so… garbage is over there.”

“I think I can compose myself. “ Though his words were sarcastic, little evidence showed on his face as she turned around to look at him. “What?” He cocked his head a little.

“I’m going to miss this when we have to go back on duty.” A small puff of air pushed from her lips. “I know we can still have mornings together, but it’s not the same as when we’re on leave.”

“I know.” Leo tucked a few wisps of hair behind her ear. “We still have yet to figure out the logistics. I know it’s not a conversation we want to have right now, but it merits a discussion, at the least, about who we’re going to tell.”

Danielle couldn’t deny the validity of his words. “Would it offend you if I told you as few people as humanly possible?”

“Well, that’s fewer than Vulcanly possible, so…” He rolled his eyes.

“That’s not what I mean. It has _nothing_ to do without the way I feel about you, Leo.” Having heard the words with her own ears, she realized how downright _lame_ they sounded. “I have never been as happy as I’ve been these past few days with you. I just don’t want either of us to be the subject of gossip and whispers, like we’re some scandal. Because we’re _not_.”

The last sentence was stated with such vehemence that any of Leonard’s concerns about her desire to keep him hidden away out of shame or embarrassment were temporarily assuaged. “So what is it you want to do then?”

“It’s going to take us a little while to figure out how to make this work on the ship with our schedules and obligations, not to mention quarters on opposite ends of the deck,” she posited. “Let’s just tell enough people to start with to cover our asses until we’re settled. Then we’ll tell everybody that matters and let the others work it out for themselves like they did with Nyota and Spock.”

“And who exactly is it that we deem necessary here in terms of Starfleet?”

Her pause made him swallow. “My uncle.” Leonard groaned. “No, Leo… come on. Think about it,” she urged.

“Why the _hell_ do you think I groaned? I _am_ thinking about it!”

“If we tell Pike,” she conjectured, “then we have effectively put the Admiralty on notice. We’re not obligated to tell anyone else?”

“And what about Jim?” He crossed his arms over his bare chest. “Don’t you think he’s going to be _pissed_?”

“As far as Jim’s concerned, by the time we tell him, we’ll have officially been together for less than a month,” she pointed out. “He’s already going to be pissed that you were getting laid with greater regularity than he was for a _year_ and didn’t tell him. What’s another few weeks for the sake of a smooth transition?”

Leonard frowned, but knew she had a point. It wasn’t like they were going to conceal their relationship with Jim until word got out. A couple of weeks wasn’t unreasonable considering that their fledgling romance was technically only a few days old.

“Fine.” He nodded tersely. “But you can’t ask me not to tell my Gran.”

Her eyebrows scrunched in puzzlement. “Why would I ask you not to tell your grandmother? I told my sister about us almost right off the bat.”

“Good. Because she already knows.”

The declaration made her stammer. “W-wait…” She held up a hand. “You told your grandmother we were having no strings attached sex?”

“Well…” He sheepishly rubbed his hand along the back of his neck. “I told her that I was seeing someone casually, but my Gran isn’t stupid. She may be getting up there in years, but the woman’s propensity for shock value hasn’t exactly mellowed.” He blushed furiously. “She figured it out _real_ quick.”

“ _Oh my God_.” Danielle’s eyes were awash with horror. She clutched at her chest in a manner that reminded Leo of a proper southern bell, clutching at her pearls. “Now, I’ll never be able to meet her. I can’t look her in the eye, Leo!”

“I don’t know about that.” He momentarily hesitated. “I only owned up to it once I realized that I wanted us to be more than what we were. If it wasn’t for Gran, I might never have been able to get my shit together.”

When Leo looked back at her, he noticed the corners of her mouth had risen. “Then perhaps I’ll be able to look her in the eye, after all. My own grandmother taught me long ago that it’s impolite to avert your gaze, especially when you’re thanking someone. It seems insincere.” She refocused her attention on breakfast and popped the bread into the toaster. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything,” he said in return, evoking memories of an earlier response she gave him as they showered.

“When did you know?”

“That I had feelings for you?” he clarified, to which she nodded. “When Lieutenant Keane was on his deathbed,” he admitted softly, the memory still raw. “And I didn’t want you to leave me.”

“I always thought it was because you didn’t want to be alone.”

“I didn’t. But it was because I didn’t want _you_ to leave. I’d have let most anyone else walk out that door.” He regarded her carefully. “I didn’t know it until after, of course. I’d started to develop a jealous streak when it came to you.”

“Oh?” The plates scraped along the counter as she pulled them closer, the hollow toast resting in the center. Danielle carefully lifted one of the cookie cutters by its small handle and tapped the mold with a knife until the egg plopped right into the bread.

“I kept worrying that you’d find someone else and would break things off.”

She laughed bitterly. “I used to think the same thing about you. It drove me crazy. It’s not like I had a claim over you.”

“Ah, see,” he interjected, placing a hand on her hip. “That’s where you’re wrong.” He watched as she repeated the process a second, then a third time. “Why do you think I’d gotten a little… _toothier_ lately?” He brushed the braid to the other shoulder to marvel the lone spot of his handiwork. “I’ve been yours for a while now, darlin’. Even if I didn’t admit it to you.” Leonard’s lips grazed over the ruddy mark.

She tapped off the induction burners. “You never asked me when I knew.”

“Okay.” Leo took a few steps back until he was halfway between the stove and the island. “I’ll bite.” Once she was facing him, he smirked. “ _Again_. When did you know?”

“When you delivered the Gorn octuplets.” The corner of her mouth lifted. “I remember watching you and being in total awe of how in control you were, yet, how you continually reassured the mother that you’d take care of her and her babies. Even when you got nipped here and there and when the last baby stopped breathing, you never showed a single sign of worry.” Danielle gently grasped the hand he hadn’t placed on her hip and lifted it. She flipped it over and started to lightly trace the lines of his palm with her index fingers, admiring them. “I remember being so proud and thinking ‘that’s my man.’” Her mouth crooked and her eyes lifted. “But you weren’t really. Not yet, anyway.”

He blinked slowly, staring down at the blonde. “I am now.”

“Yes.” Danielle curved forward to press her lips to his palm. “You are.”

* * *

 

“There’s my girl.”

Danielle’s head snapped up at the all-too-familiar voice. She’d been hearing that particular phrase for as long as she could remember, but it was the distinctive timbre of the man who uttered those words that was as good as embedded in her bones.

She stood from the table and watched him approach. He was a little less steady than in her youth, due to injury more so than age. Until a little over a year ago, they had sometimes gone running together on their mutual days off, even if the habit had petered off during her college and graduate school years. Unfortunately, it seemed those days were over. But she would gladly give up their morning runs if it meant that she could keep him just a little longer.

“Uncle Chris.” Danielle positively beamed at the man with salt and pepper hair.

“Come over here and give your old uncle a hug,” he commanded in a light-hearted tone, holding out the arm unfettered by his cane. His pale blue eyes were alight with mischief. “I’m injured, you know.”

She side-stepped the table to embrace him, looking up at him with a warmth reserved just for the admiral. “You’re going to play this up for as long as you can, aren’t you?”

“Absolutely. I’m rather enjoying the handicapped parking and the attention of the pretty nurses,” Pike returned. “Now sit down. I haven’t seen you in months and it’s your job to tell me about everything your captain glosses over.”

“Jim doesn’t-“ He fixed her with a knowing stare. “Okay, okay. Fine.” She settled back into her seat and lifted the menu. “He’s taken to the chair better than I ever expected. Off the record, there’s barely anything to report.”

“And whatever it is…” Christopher rested his cane against the white wall beside them. “I don’t want to know. Plausible deniability.”

“You and Jim are more similar than anyone would care to believe.” She reached for her water. “How’s rehab going?”

Pike tilted his head back and forth. “Alright. Phil says it’s a miracle that I’m standing, let alone walking, and I should be satisfied with my progress.”

“But you’re not,” Danielle surmised.

“No.”

“He’s not wrong.” She folded her hands neatly at the table’s edge. “I was afraid you’d die on the table when we got you back. I wasn’t giving any thought to walking, all things considered. I’m happy just to have you here.”

He extended his arm across the table to give her hand an affectionate squeeze. “Couldn’t leave my favorite girl to handle Jim Kirk all on her own, could I?” When he leaned back in his seat, he set his menu aside. “Now, what is it you wanted to tell me?”

Her forehead wrinkled. “What do you mean?”

“Oh come on, sunshine,” Chris groaned a bit, utilizing her childhood nickname. “I _know_ you, remember? You’ve been flakey about answering my comms that weren’t work-related the past few weeks and when you sit like that…” He flicked his wrist to where she was hunched over her hands. “It means something’s on your mind.”

She glanced down. Then straightened. “I don’t know what- “

“If it’s about you and Dr. McCoy, I already know,” he answered evenly, calmly unfurling his menu again as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“But- what- wh-?” she sputtered. “ _How_?”

Chris shook his head and positioned his index finger beneath her chin to close her gaping mouth. “Give me a little credit here. I still keep tabs on you.” The corner of his lips curled as he adjusted in his chair. “Gianni says you and Dr. McCoy have been coming here three times a week for the past month,” he explained, referring to the proprietor of the restaurant. “Alfonso’s red sauce is good, but it’s not _that_ good.”

A bright flush overwhelmed her normally-fair features. “I see.”

“As do I.” When the waiter came over to check on them, they placed their orders and quickly returned to the conversation at hand. “How long has this been going on?”

“Do you want the detailed answer that might ruin your perception of me?” She flinched. “Or the one that preserves it?”

“Danielle, you’re a grown woman. I have no delusions, but I’d like to be able to eat my food when it comes out of the kitchen.”

She dipped her head and rubbed at her wrist, a nervous habit Chris had observed in her since she was in pre-school. “It’s been casual since last Halloween,” she explained carefully, letting the implication hang in the air without specifying anything. “But a few weeks ago, Leo and I decided we wanted to give it serious a shot.”

“I see.”

Danielle nibbled on the inside of her cheek. “Are you upset with me?”

Pike merely shook his head. “It’s not as if crew members don’t get involved, Danielle. Hell, if you think I didn’t know what was going on with Spock while he was teaching at the Academy…” He snorted, rolling his eyes. “My point is that I know Dr. McCoy is a smart, dedicated, and loyal man. I have entrusted him with my life, which is the greatest vestige of trust that I can offer. Aside from trusting him with yours, which, in ensuring your commission on the Enterprise after Nero, I effectively _did_.” He let his words hang in the air for a moment. “It would be hypocritical of me to now take that back.”

Danielle nodded her head in understanding as Pike’s words sunk in. She figured this was about as close to his outright approval as she was ever going to get.

“However, that doesn’t mean I won’t cut his dick off if he hurts you.”

His goddaughter nearly spat out the water she’d been drinking. “Uncle Chris!”

“What?” He flipped his palm upwards. “You know it’s true. And that’s _before_ your father, in all of his beguiled wisdom, gets his hands on him.”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“Thank you.” He lifted his chin, quite pleased with himself. . “So… since your parents are going to be on Deneva for Thanksgiving this year, am I correct to presume that you’ll be bringing Dr. McCoy to Thanksgiving at my house?”

“Jim’s going to be there, too,” she pointed out. “And you’re honestly the first person we’ve told aside from Sam and Leo’s Gran.”

“Surely you and Leonard can keep your hands off of each other for a day.” He eyed her with a hint of challenge.

Danielle let out a resigned breath. Unless Leo insisted on going back to Georgia to visit his grandmother, which she knew he _wouldn’t_ because he’d be emotionally tortured by the fact he was so close to where Joanna was, yet couldn’t see her, she’d have no choice but to give in. Not to mention, her sister would harass her to death if she _didn’t_ show up with Leonard.

She wiped her hand over her face. “Just tell me what you want us to bring…”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part of Leonard was interested to see what Chris’s approach would be. However, the rest of him was terrified.

“Goddamn stupid tie,” Leo grumbled, giving a yank on the navy linen accented with thin gray stripes. “The damn thing is trying to strangle me.”

Danielle batted his hands away from the material, settling her metallic silver heels on the pavers leading to the door of the Pike family home. “I told you that you didn’t have to wear a tie,” she supplied under her breath, loosening the knot until she had each end of the tie in her hands.

“And what if _Pike_ wears a tie?” he conjectured, eyes never leaving her face.

“ _Jim’s_ not going to be wearing a tie,” Danielle countered, beginning to maneuver the silk into a knot.

“Nobody gives a shit about what the kid is wearing so long as he has pants on and more importantly-“ Leonard griped. “Jim isn’t _banging_ Pike’s goddaughter,” Leo tacked on in a harsh whisper. The remark earned him a sharp yank of the knot around his throat. “ _What?_ It’s not like I’m complainin’ about it…”

“Is that what you told _Gran_?” she hissed in retort. “That we’re _banging_?”

“ _No_.” Leonard flushed. “I told her that we were _together_ together now.”

Danielle made a few last adjustments to the tie before smoothing her hands out over his shoulders and chest to eliminate any wrinkles in the fabric. “And you have the audacity to call Jim an infant. That’s playground behavior if I ever heard it.”

Leonard stooped his head sheepishly. “Sorry.” His strong hands lightly settled on her hips where the silhouette of her fit-and-flare dress nipped in at the waist. “Would it help if I told you I _like_ _you_ like you?”

She turned away from him to stop herself from smiling. “Maybe.”

“Come on, darlin’…” he said sweetly, rubbing his thumb over one of the large black flowers on the otherwise white linen dress. “Don’t be mad at me. S’just important to me that I make a good impression.”

“You’ve known him for almost five years now,” she countered, though her voice was far more level.

“God knows he never had a momentary lapse of good judgment big enough to invite me to his home.” He leaned forward to rest his forehead against hers. “We’ll call it a second first impression then, okay?”

The grin she’d been trying to suppress finally broke through. “Okay.” A sudden flutter of the curtains beside the front door caught Danielle’s eye. “Looks like someone didn’t grow out of the eavesdropping habit.” At his slightly widened eyes, she waved a hand to put him at ease. “My sister,” she clarified just as the door opened and a brunette launched herself at the blonde. “Oof!”

An ear-splitting shriek of excitement caused Leo to wince and tug on his earlobe. Apparently, girls’ screams increased in their ability to make his brain shake within his skull the older they were. “Well, I’m sufficiently deaf now.”

“Be nice…” Danielle chided as her sister rocked her back and forth. “Okay, Sam. I missed you too, but you’re going to make me throw up if you keep this going.”

The brunette with dark eyes took a step back, though her fingers remained curl around her older sister’s biceps. “I just can’t believe you’re here!”

“You know I’m not on lockdown when I’m in San Francisco, Sam,” she laughed softly. “You’re allowed to comm me and make plans. The Academy doesn’t own your every breath.”

“That’s what they’d like you to think…” Leo griped, taking a step closer to the women. “Sam, it’s nice to see you again.”

The sisters exchanged a knowing glance. “You too, Dr. McCoy.” Sam smiled broadly in a way that vaguely reminded him of Jim’s shit-eating grin from days of old and moved to hug him. “Have you gotten taller, by chance?”

“S'just Leo now.” He gave her a pat on the back. “And no, m’am. Stopped growin’ at seventeen. My mama was plenty happy that my metabolism slowed enough that she could actually keep food in the house.”

“You’re broader,” Danielle interred, dropping a tiny smile. It was far smaller than the one she felt she was sporting in her own head. “You’ve probably put on about fifteen pounds of muscle mass since she saw you at the commission ceremony.”

Samantha took a step back to appraise him, eyes surveying his body from head to toe. “Hmm… trimmed down in other areas though. You have the shoulder to waist ratio of an upside down tortilla chip.”

Danielle rolled her eyes. “Also known as an inverted triangle, but _okay_.”

“What’s an inverted triangle now?” a voice rumbled from the door.

Leonard straightened to his full height, body rigid. “Admiral,” he greeted him in a full-bodied voice as a sign of respect. “Good afternoon.”

“At ease, McCoy.” Pike held up the hand not steadying his weight on the cane. The admiral stood in the doorway in a crisp white button down- _without_ , as the doctor noted, a tie of any kind. “You can leave the formalities at the door. We’re not in uniform. I’m just Chris here… “

“Yes, sir- I mean, Admiral-“ Leonard pinched the bridge of his nose. “Goddamn it.”

“Now, that’s not my name either, son.” Chris flashed him a wry smirk and waved them towards the door. “Come on in. Sam insisted on making some snacks while dinner finishes up. I think it’s just so she fills Jim up enough that he doesn’t eat all of the dark meat like last year.”

“Not true!” Sam narrowed her eyes at him. “I mean yeah, he did eat all the dark meat. But I’m _starving_ and if Jim decides to spend his Thanksgiving morning and afternoon trying to pick up some girl dressed as a pilgrim or Native American at the parade, and we have to wait for him for the turkey because it's the ‘polite thing to do,'” she scoffed, “then I sure as _hell_ am not going to starve while we wait.”

“One year it was both,” Leonard mumbled under his breath.

Sam groaned loudly, retreating into the house with her hands over her ears. “Ugh. I did _not_ need that mental picture!”

“Neither did I, but that didn’t mean I still didn’t have to walk in on it.” He shuddered with a grind of his teeth.

Pike’s laughter rumbled in the doorway. “Good thing your quarters are on another deck altogether then, isn’t it?”

“You have _no_ idea. He also has a tendency to over share.”

“Well, then for all our sake’s…” Chris turned with the aid of his cane to follow his younger goddaughter back towards the kitchen. “Let’s hope he doesn’t score at the parade.”

Danielle chuckled and looked over at Leonard. “Come on. Let’s go help out, so we can all bitch at Jim later that he did _not_.” She gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

Leo let her lead him into the house, nudging the door closed as they passed. “He has no idea what he’s walking into, does he?”

“He actually _does_ , that’s the crazy part.” She lifted her shoulders. “But he knows we all mean well and it’s because we care about him.”

“He needs that,” McCoy confided, dipping his head so only she could hear.

Danielle angled her body inward as they crossed the threshold of the kitchen and its hardwood floors. “He’s not the only one.” Her green eyes were soft as they scanned his features.

The corner of his mouth rose. “Looks like he and I both found it, then. Didn’t we?”

Blake opened her mouth to speak, but was deterred by the booming voice of Pike again. “McCoy!” he called from his place at the stove, where Sam was determinedly straining blanched spinach, pressing out all of the water through the colander. “Before my goddaughters boot me out of the kitchen against my will for hovering, I’m going to grab a beer. Care to join me in the basement?”

An image of an assortment of alien tortures devices in a dungeon beneath their feet suddenly flashed through Leo’s mind. He found the lump in his throat hard to swallow, eyes darting towards his girlfriend now at her sister’s side for a lifeline.

She offered him a sympathetic smile, but no escape route. “Go on. We’ve got it under control here.”

His hard stare did not go unnoticed.

“Sure. Beer sounds great,” he replied with a forced smile.

* * *

Leonard trudged down the stairs to the basement after Pike. He had no doubt in his mind what was coming: the doctor was about to get _the talk_ from a man who was not only a second father to his girlfriend, but one who had recruited him and stood as his far superior officer.

He’d endured something similar over a decade before. Jocelyn’s father had cornered him shortly after being introduced to the family over Christmas break their freshman year of college. Their relationship had only been seven months old at the time, blossoming at the high school prom that May, but the man was already throwing around words like ‘engagement’ and ‘marriage’, phrases like ‘providing for his daughter’ and ‘a lifestyle she’s grown accustomed to.’

He could never regret marrying Jocelyn, if only for the fact that his beloved Joanna had been its product. But there were times he wished he’d been braver, that he hadn’t been so blind. And that he’d never caved to the pressure of Mr. Darnell, so he could set a tone of equality in the relationship that seemed to be lost after that night.

Part of Leonard was interested to see what Chris’s approach would be. However, the rest of him was terrified.

“I taught Danielle how to play pool on this very table,” Chris remarked wistfully, snapping Leo out of his stupor. “She was god awful to start with. Scratched the felt so often that I decided not to have it replaced until she graduated high school.” He ran his fingers over a discolored swoosh in the green fabric. “By then, I didn’t have the heart to do it. Thought it had more character this way.” He glanced up. “Amazing how your priorities can change with age.”

He nodded dutifully. “That it is.”

Pike dipped his head a single time and made a bee-line for the refrigerator built into the cherry wood bar. “When I was younger, not too far off from your own age now, I knew that I’d be married to my job, to any ship I stepped foot on.” He pulled open one stainless steel door, his back now to McCoy. “Relations on ships weren’t as common then as they are now, but they existed. I thought if I found someone that way, great. If not, then I was content to let Starfleet be my life.”

He retrieved two bottles of beer and handed one to the younger man. “Thanks.”

Pike nodded and continued. “Right before my fortieth birthday, I made captain. My ship was just coming out of a retrofit and I couldn’t wait to step foot onto that shuttle headed for space dock as the captain. I greeted every family member of every person under my command that day, watched from the windows as they all waved at us when we took off. But no one was there to see me off.”

“No one saw me off on my first trip either, s- Chris.” He glanced down at the brown glass. “Or our first trip back out when I was commissioned as CMO. I know the feeling.”

“Hard to stomach, isn’t it?” He tipped back the bottle at his lips. “Anyway… we were out in the black for five weeks on a diplomatic mission. About a month after we got back, Danielle was born.”

“April 3rd, if I’m not mistaken.”

“You’re not.” Chris’s lips curled. “I was terrified to hold her. I had virtually _zero_ experience with babies and I’d agreed to be her godfather because I didn’t want to insult John and Melinda. But babies… just weren’t my thing.”

McCoy nodded around his first pull from the bottle. He wasn’t exactly sure what Pike wanted him to say to any of that.

“Melinda showed me the right way to hold her, which… you’d think after, oh- two decades in Starfleet, I’d know…” Pike snorted at the memory. “But once Danielle was in my arms, I understood the breadth of my responsibility was no less than that of being in the chair. Because she was the daughter of my best friend and the closest thing I had to a brother, maybe even greater.”

He placed the beer down on the bar top and dug around his pocket for his civilian phone. After a moment, he scrolled to the image he was looking for and held it out for Leonard to see.

The picture displayed a far younger Admiral Pike, with strawberry brown waves tumbling over a smooth forehead. There was a tiny baby in his arms, only a couple of months old by Leonard’s estimation, and a broad smile on his face as he sat in a chair the doctor vaguely recalled seeing on his way past the den.

“This her?” he asked, finding it hard to imagine that his girlfriend could have ever been that small and fragile.

“Yeah…” A fond smile McCoy had not been previously privy to appeared on his lips. “Bald as a cue ball ‘til she was sixteen months old,” Pike chortled with a shake of his head. “Every time Mel took her to the pediatrician, she kept asking when the kid would grow hair. As you can see, the doctor’s assurances that she’d have a head of hair worth envying were correct.”

“Joanna came out with a full head of hair and her mama’s eyes,” Leonard related with a prideful smile and a gulp of the amber liquid. “Big and brown and able to get me to do whatever she wanted.”

“How old is she now?”

“Eight and a half.” The doctor shook his head with amusement. “The half is very important, you know.”

“I’m well aware. Who do you think insisted on having half a cake to mark her half birthdays?” Pike challenged with raised brows.

McCoy didn’t doubt the notion for a moment. “I’ll have to file that one away for nine and a half.” His pleasant façade faltered a bit. “At the least, I can order her one and have it delivered. If her mother doesn’t refuse delivery.”

“I knew things weren’t amicable, but I didn’t know they were vindictive.”

“We separated when Joanna was two. It’s hard to make a marriage work when you’re the only one fighting for it.” Leo let out a burdened sigh. “Even if I didn’t love her anymore, I was willing to stay with Jocelyn just so that Jo could grow up with two parents who loved her at home. But my ex-wife had already moved on. Truthfully,” he paused for just a moment, “she’d been moving on for a long time. To the point where I ran a paternity test.”

Pike’s brows furrowed at his admission. “But she’s…”

“Yeah.” He swallowed thickly. “She’s mine. I try not to think about what would have happened if it turned out she wasn’t. Joanna…” He downed a long sip of the beer. “She’s my greatest accomplishment in life. I’d burn planets to dust to keep her safe. She’s- my daughter is my everything.”

“So you understand how I feel then,” Christopher surmised, picking at the label on the glass bottle. “I’m not Danielle’s father, but what she and I had all those years, what we developed is the type of relationship I know many biological parents and children never have the chance to know.” A beat passed. “That’s not meant to insinuate anything about you and your daughter. It’s more a reflection of my friend’s relationship with his own daughter.”

“I realize that, sir.”

“My point is, Leonard,” Pike pressed forward, “is that what she and I have makes it a priority to ensure her happiness in life. There is not much I wouldn’t do for my crew. There is far less I wouldn’t do for her.”

Leo nodded and took a strained drink.

“Do we understand each other, Dr. McCoy?” Chris asked in a flat tone. His light blue eyes studied McCoy in a manner that made the younger man feel as though he was shrinking.

“Yes, sir.”

“Good.” Pike clapped him on the back. _Hard_. “Now let’s get upstairs before the girls start to wonder whether I’ve killed you and am in the process of dismantling your corpse down here.”

Chris let out a broad chuckle. Leonard’s smile barely even reached his cheekbones.

* * *

With the roux at the bottom of the pot now smooth, Sam glanced sideways at her sister. The brunette was beyond overjoyed when she found out that her sister had _some_ form of a personal life, even if it was casual and without strings. Space was lonely, the woman’s childhood even more so, and she truly deserved companionship.

Then Danielle called one morning, the shower running in the background without her in it, and it didn’t take all of her cadet’s training to figure it out.

Leonard McCoy was a good guy. He had southern manners, even if he had a grouch’s tongue, and he valued intelligence and loyalty, both of which her sister had in spades. Most importantly, he valued her friendship and their partnership, even before it had been defined.

It was strange to see the elder Blake as one-half of a couple. Having to care for Sam while still in high school had prevented Danielle from having much of a social life and what short time she had was mainly spent with friends, rather than with dates. Seeing her holding hands with McCoy as they walked into the kitchen caused her brain to practically short circuit.

Though, Samantha Blake couldn’t help but admit that smitten was a good look for her sister.

“You know,” she whispered, angling her body a little towards Danielle. “They’ve been down there for a really long time.”

“I know.” Her blonde hair dipped. “Uncle Chris has been storing up his big talk for twenty-eight years. I don’t think much scares Leo anymore, but if anything could do it, it’s this. Can you imagine how well-rehearsed this thing is?”

Sam snorted. “I’m glad you’re the oldest. Means your boyfriend gets to be the unfortunate guinea pig.”

“And what would you have done if I was a spinster?” Danielle challenged as she started to roll out the biscuit dough.

The younger Blake opened her mouth to counter, but a deep voice beat her to the punch. “Who’s a spinster now?”

The sisters turned to find their godfather making his way into the kitchen, beer in hand and a slightly surly Leonard McCoy trailing behind. The blonde tilted her head as she caught Leonard’s gaze. He responded with a cock of his eyebrow.

“ _No one_ ,” Blake griped with a pointed look at Samantha.

“I was just saying that I was convinced she’d be one until Leonard came along,” the cadet clarified.

“ _Nice_.” Leo rolled his eyes. He stepped closer to the counter, watching Danielle’s continued work on the bread. “Is that biscuit dough?”

“Mhmm.”

“I’ll have you know my mama raised me to be the best biscuit baker in all of Georgia,” he boasted, leaning against the counter.

“We’ll have to put that to the test sometime, but not today. Unfortunately, you already missed the part where I make the dough.”

“Sweetheart, if you think I’m letting you cut out biscuits with that damn cookie cutter over there, you’re sorely mistaken,” Leo countered with a grimace. He sorted through the empty cans littering the counter until he found the perfect one. “Never get a good pressed edge with those. Makes them less flakey.”

With the milk incorporated into the roux, along with the cheese, Sam set the burner beneath the pot to low and took a few footsteps backward to join Pike in observing the couple.

“So did you put the fear of God in him?”

“Something like that.” The corner of Pike’s mouth curved. “But I don’t think I'm going to have to make good on any of my promises.”

Sam smiled in concurrence, watching as Leo stood behind Danielle with a clean can and demonstrated how to cut perfect circles of dough with the makeshift tool. Every so often, she’d turn around for confirmation that the biscuits were up to his standards and received a warm grin in return, which never failed to draw a matching one from her lips. “Me either.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “When you said Pike goes all out for Christmas Eve dinner, you really weren’t kidding.”
> 
> “I did tell you to pack a pair of sweats for a reason.”
> 
> Leonard snapped the waistband of his lounge pants. “I listened, didn’t I?”
> 
> Danielle smirked over at him. “Would you like a cookie?”
> 
> He groaned, face paling at the mere thought of food. “Good God, no. And I hate you a little for even mentioning food.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thank you to my lovely beta, Dana. <3

If someone had told Leonard McCoy as recently as a year ago that he would ever consider a Christmas to be merry again, he would have most likely laughed out loud and at length. After all, McCoy certainly didn’t expect to mark the holiday with anything other than a bottle of bourbon, drowning his sorrows while looking through old photos of him and Joanna.

Nor did he anticipate donning a Santa hat while carrying a tray of breakfast to a gorgeous blonde on Christmas Eve while she was still asleep in the bed they so often shared.

He gingerly lowered the tray onto her nightstand and found a perch for himself at the edge of her side of the mattress. His long, steady fingers carded through her flaxen tresses in an affectionate gesture he hoped would rouse her. Yet, when it proved ineffective, Leonard bent forward to press kisses along her cheek and neck.

Danielle twisted a little beneath the blanket, drawing up her shoulder to trap his chin. “Morning,” she mumbled, hand curling around the back of his head to hold him close.

“Good morning, darlin’,” he hummed against her skin. “ _And_ Merry Christmas.”

“Mmm. I nearly forgot what day it was.” She hesitated. “But wait… isn’t it Christmas _Eve_?”

“Well, I can’t exactly wake you up on Christmas like this with Jim next door and Pike a few rooms away, now can I?” Leonard chuckled. “Besides, the only reason you forgot it’s Christmas Eve is because you didn’t decorate the bedroom, unlike the rest of the apartment. _But_ ,” he quickly added, “I’m not complaining. I never thought I’d have another Christmas tree again… or want to celebrate the holiday at all.”

“The first of many Christmas trees, I hope,” she related, eyes still closed.

“I agree wholeheartedly.” He gently brushed some hair from her eyes. “I see no reason why the tradition shouldn’t continue. _And_ on the subject of traditions, I’ve decided to start one of our very own with the first of my presents to you.”

Her eyes fluttered open, squinting to adjust to the light. “Oh?”

“Breakfast in bed for my gorgeous girlfriend.” He flicked his hand towards the tray.

“I’ll never get tired of hearing you call me the g-word.”

McCoy cocked an eyebrow. “Which one? Gorgeous?” His hand smoothed up her back, gliding from the base of her spine to the nape of her neck. “Or girlfriend?”

“Either one, really,” she chuckled. “Girlfriend, especially. But this is a wonderful present, Leo. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me until you taste it. For all you know, it could taste like cardboard.”

“I admit that I have a more expansive repertoire of recipes, but you’re not too shabby in the kitchen, sweetheart.”

Leo wedged his arms beneath her body, encircling her shapely form. His chest was pressed against her bare forearm and his nose against her cheek. The way his body naturally molded around hers no longer took him by surprise, but the warmth that blossomed in his chest when they were this close and entangled was far more satisfying than it had ever been with Jocelyn, even in the prime of their relationship.

“You do know that you have to let me up so that I can enjoy the incredibly thoughtful breakfast you slaved over, right?” Danielle teased him and turned her head so that she could look up into his eyes.

“I’m strongly reconsidering my recommendation to eat it while it’s hot.”

Danielle pinched his arm with a noise of protest. “ _Leo_!”

He rubbed at the sore spot. “Okay, okay… fine.” Leonard held up his arms in mock surrender as he straightened back to his feet. Then he lifted the tray while waiting for her to adjust to a more comfortable eating position. “But when you’re done, we’re going to lay in bed and trade Christmas stories. Deal?”

Danielle rubbed at her bleary eyes, still squinting a little under the assault of the sunlight. “Deal,” she declared once she had pushed herself up so that the wooden headboard propped up her back.

Leo carefully set the tray atop her legs and sat back down on the edge of her bed. He plucked the mug from its shallow surface and smiled, holding it up as though it were a toast.

“I was wondering why I had both coffee and OJ…”

“Your first hint should have been that it was black.” He took a long, but satisfying pull from the mug. “I’m disappointed in you, Watson.”

Danielle narrowed her eyes at him as she cut into a pancake. These days, it was hard even _pretending_ to be mad at him. At least, not when she only wanted to curl up with her boyfriend, kiss him, and never let him go. Though, not always in that order.

“Would saying that I was too distracted by your handsomeness be an acceptable excuse, Mr. Holmes?”

“… Yes.”

“Then that’s what I’m going with,” she declared as she tucked into her breakfast. Upon the first bite, she moaned loudly in a mixture of surprise and delight. “Oh my God, _Leo_ … this is delicious. Where did you learn to make pancakes?”

A bashful smile lit up his features. “My mama taught me when I was in kindergarten. Said that one day, I’d settle down with a nice girl and it was only right I make her breakfast every now and then.”

He let out a bark of laughter at the memory of his pajamas coated in flour and his mother brushing the white dust from his hair.  Leonard had always been so eager to help her in the kitchen, often overzealous to the point of disaster.

Once, he had tripped while helping her carry a pot of chicken and dumplings to the refrigerator and the contents splattered across three-quarters of the kitchen. Another time, her banana cream pie wound up cemented to the ceiling after his sister snuck up on him and their father had to scrape it off later that day. Though, the house still smelled of bananas for nearly a year.

On that particular day however, the day his mother had taught him her secret family recipe, the only real disaster was Leonard’s failure to keep the electric hand mixer all the way in the batter, resulting in a puff of flour and a coating of white from head to toe.

And while most mothers, southern or otherwise, would have given their child a tongue lashing for being so careless, Eleanora McCoy merely finished up their pancakes on the griddle and then showed her son how to shake off the flour to make a cloud so thick, he could disappear before his sister’s very eyes.

It took Donna months to figure out how he’d vanished.

“She sounds wonderful, Leo.” Danielle reached over the tray to squeeze his hand.

“I wish you could have met her,” Leonard lamented, ducking his head. “She would have loved you, you know. You are exactly the kind of girl she wanted me to end up with, not Jocelyn. But I know she never said much about it because she wanted me to be happy.”

“Well, I endeavor to do her proud and look after you in her stead.” She dipped her head to punctuate the sentence before releasing his hand. “ _And_ I’m sure she would be appalled if she knew you only made breakfast for one. A chef should enjoy the spoils of his success,” she insisted, holding up a forkful of pancake. “Come on… you know you want to.”

Leonard rolled his eyes, but relented nevertheless. He hummed around the bite, closing his lids to savor the taste and the feeling of home that accompanied it. His pancakes would never be as good as his mother’s because of the love and affection she infused into every bite, but maybe someday, his would hold that extra something special for someone else to enjoy.

_And maybe, there’s still time to end up with the kind of girl she wanted for me._

* * *

The best thing about making Danielle breakfast was easily the way her lips tasted of maple syrup, a fact that Leo enjoyed repeatedly throughout the morning as they laid on the couch and watched a marathon of Christmas movies on cable.

“What time do we have to be at Pike’s?” Leo inquired as the film faded into a commercial break.

“Around four,” she replied, glancing up at him over her shoulder, “so we should probably leave at three just in case there’s traffic. Why?”

He brushed some stray strands away from her cheeks so that he could see her face a little better. “Trying to figure out when to give you your Christmas present.”

“Um…” Blake’s forehead wrinkled as she eyed him curiously. “Tomorrow morning. When everyone opens them together at Uncle Chris’s house, like we talked about.”

Leonard laughed, causing her brows to further furrow. “I said pre- _sent_ , not pre- _sents_.” He bent a few inches to kiss her temple. “There’s only one I want to give you while it’s still just you and me.” She opened her mouth to speak, only to find his index finger over her lips. “And _no_ , it’s nothing sexual. Remember who you’re talking to.”

Her lips twisted into a wry grin beneath his digit. “I am.”

“Mm.” He pulled his hand away and continued to drop his head until he found her mouth with his own. “Just for that, you definitely deserve your present now.”

With a smirk, Leonard surged from the couch with Danielle still in his arms and hoisted her over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. Her laughter between squeals of protest echoed off the walls of the apartment, though he did not pay much mind to it. In fact, her behavior actually spurred him on.

Eventually, he set her down on her feet in front of the sparse Christmas tree. The Enterprise was originally due back from its most recent mission on December 23rd, having departed space dock two days after Thanksgiving. Their mission was to persuade the Bolians to allow the Federation to trade through the Bank of Bolias. The bank was considered the most popular financial institution in the Alpha Quadrant, used by both natives and many off-worlders. However, surprisingly smooth negotiations meant that the ship and her crew arrived back in port a full week earlier than expected.

By the time Danielle decided she wanted a tree for the apartment four days before Christmas, very few trees remained and the meager Frasier fir that sat in the den was the best of a highly scrawny bunch.

Even worse was the selection of ornaments left in all the stores. Small containers remained, but only in mismatched colors and there was not a single strand of white lights to be found. As a result, Leo declared the tree looked like “unicorn vomit,” save for the spaceship that sat atop the needles in place of a star or an angel.

“I have to say, I’m still really partial to the Enterprise as a tree topper,” she snorted, gaze flitting to the gleaming ship.

“Should have been a unicorn horn,” he mumbled under his breath, stooping to pick up a small box from beneath the tree. “Here it is,” he declared as he held out the tidily wrapped box. “And before you comment, _no_ , I did not wrap it. They did it at the store. So my apologies in advance for the sorry state of the rest of your presents.”

Danielle ran her fingers over the lustrous crimson paper draped in a metallic gold bow. “You could have just handed it to me, no box, no wrap, no nothing and I wouldn’t have cared. You didn’t have to get me anything at all.”

“ _Now,_ you tell me that,” he jested, rocking back on his heels.

She rolled her eyes as she daintily unknotted the ribbon, which pulled apart easily in her hands. A moment later, she tucked the crinkled paper under her arm and lifted the lid. “ _Leo_ , it’s _beautiful_ ,” she gasped, fingering the antique gold [locket](http://i61.tinypic.com/mijn0w.jpg).

“Open it,” he encouraged.

She swung aside the outer cabochon, a hollow flower through which the [image](http://i59.tinypic.com/9plz45.jpg) shown through. “They’re stars,” she marveled, eyes transfixed on the purple and blue cloud nebula, dotted with crystals.

“Not just any stars,” he corrected and took a step closer to trace his fingers between them. “But a constellation.”

She watched him draw out the invisible pattern a second time before the realization dawned on her. “It’s Leo.”

“It is.” He dipped his head once. “I figured that this was something you could wear that looked pretty on its own, but has a deeper, hidden meaning. No one will think enough about the stars to connect the dots.” He paused. “No pun intended. Open the second latch.”

The blonde acted as instructed, revealing a small [photo](http://i62.tinypic.com/2v8sfpg.jpg). It was one that had been taken at Sulu’s birthday party by his younger sister, who insisted on playing photographer for the evening so she could turn all of the photos into a scrapbook for the helmsman. The couple had been chatting off to the side, playing a game of “Name that Academy Conquest” in honor of their friend and captain, when Yuki insisted on taking a picture. The younger woman deemed it absolutely perfect and frame-worthy on the first try.

Danielle didn’t even know how Leo had gotten a hold of her.

“Leo,” she gasped, her hand resting over her heart. “It’s beautiful.”

“You most certainly were that night… and still are.”

She looked up at him, teardrops clinging to the ends of her long lashes. “I love it.” She took a few swift steps to close the distance between them and threw her arms around him, hugging Leo tightly. “ _Thank you_.”

Even as Leonard’s arms wrapped around her for what seemed like the millionth time, he was still surprised how naturally their bodies conformed to each other.

“You’re very welcome, darlin’.” He pulled back just a little to wipe beneath her eyes with the pads of his thumbs. “I’m glad I decided to give it to you now, rather than wait ‘til just before we left. Would have been very late to Pike’s.”

“For a number of reasons, I imagine… the least of which would have been my ruined makeup.” She flashed him a watery smile. “And what do you know, I have a gift of my own to give you now, rather than tomorrow.” She took a step back to rifle through the presents, finally fishing out an envelope from between two emerald-wrapped boxes.

With an arched brow, her carefully tore open the brown paper and pulled the thick cardstock from inside. “[Yosemite National Park](http://i58.tinypic.com/10p26go.jpg)?”

Danielle flushed sheepishly. “I thought if you didn’t have any plans for New Year’s, we could spend the weekend. I rented us a cabin inside the gates of the park, only a few miles from the waterfall. It’s all traditional, exposed beams and cedar walls and knotted wood cabinets. The closest neighbor is a quarter of a mile away.” She wrung her fingers together. “But if you have other plans, I’m sure I can convince my sister and uncle to go inste-“

Leonard covered the minimal distance between their bodies to kiss her, cradling her fair cheeks in his hands. “I only have two plans on my mind right now,” he informed her. “One, to kiss my thoughtful, sexy girlfriend at midnight on January 1st. And two…” He lifted her over his shoulder for the second time that day, heading towards the small corridor off to the side. “To show said amazing girlfriend how much I love her present.”

“But we have to start getting ready soon! Or we’re going to be late and get there after Jim and look all sorts of suspicious…”

“Give me a little more credit than that, Dr. Blake,” he snorted as he crossed the threshold to her bedroom and continued on towards the bathroom. “Showering together will save us at _least_ forty five minutes.”

* * *

True to Leonard’s word, he and Danielle arrived at Pike’s house just shy over four in the afternoon, where Jim was nowhere to be found. Instead, he arrived a little after five, just in time for dinner.

Which truthfully, surprised no one.

In previous years, only Chris, Samantha, and Danielle had been present, yet the girls’ godfather always managed to go overboard on the catering. This year, he was already poised to top the previous holiday with another planned attendee. That guest was Jim Kirk, who’d been invited after a disastrous return to Iowa in 2258 that led to the newly-minted captain catching the first shuttle out of Riverside on Christmas day and drinking himself into a stupor back in San Francisco, at which point a few too many miss calls led to a care package of leftovers from Danielle Blake and three days of a movie marathon.

The addition of Leonard McCoy, whose attendance was a foregone assumption in Pike’s mind, brought their grand total of diners up to five and well- that sent Christopher Pike over the edge. It didn’t hurt that Christmas Eve was always the Feast of the Seven Fishes in his family _and_ fresh seafood was easy to come by in San Francisco for any restaurant worth their salt.

And was A16 _ever_.

They had dined on antipasti of baked oysters with escarole, Calabrian chilis, and breadcrumbs, baccala with potatoes and olives, charred octopus with beans and peppers, and McFarland Spring trout with celery root and apples. Then followed that up with squid ink tonnarelli and Dungeness crab dressed in preserved lemon and parsley, as well as cavatelli with mussels and broccoli rabe.

And as if _that_ wasn’t already more than enough, a final entrée of black cod and clams with cauliflower, salsa verde, and watercress topped off their swollen stomachs.

It had taken a full two hours before anyone at the table could so much as touch the honeycomb bunt cake, cookie plate, chocolate pistachio ganache, chestnut pralines, canele, biscotti, or even the damn fruit platter.

And it was the current reason why Danielle Blake and Leonard McCoy were lying on their backs in the bed she’d called her own as long as she’d been staying with her godfather, unable to even consider moving.

“When you said Pike goes all out for Christmas Eve dinner, you really _weren’t_ kidding.”

“I _did_ tell you to pack a pair of sweats for a reason.”

Leonard snapped the waistband of his lounge pants. “I listened, didn’t I?”

Danielle smirked over at him. “Would you like a cookie?”

He groaned, face paling at the mere thought of food. “Good God, _no_. And I hate you a little for even mentioning food.”

“No, you don’t.” She waved him off nonchalantly. “Because you know that if it wasn’t for the fact that we’re both nearing a food coma, you’d have me pressed up against the locked door, daring me not to scream.”

“Mm.” Leonard closed his eyes at the thought, letting the mental picture wash over him. “Damn right, I would.”

“Leo?” she addressed him with a soft poke of his shoulder. “Are you gonna fall asleep? Because you can’t-“

“I know.” He rubbed at his eyes. “Kirk sharing one wall is trouble enough and I can’t in good conscience stay here with you in your godfather’s house. My southern constitution is screaming at me for even thinking such a thing.”

“As much as I don’t like waking up alone, your manners are incredibly endearing. _And_ ,” she tacked on with a wry smile, “they’re earning you lots of brownie points.”

“Really? Exactly how many brownie points are we talking here…?”

“ _Tons_.”

Leonard turned his head to brush his lips against Danielle’s. “I can’t wait to cash them in, but I think I have to head back to my room.”

A heavy sigh tumbled from her throat. “I know.” Danielle rolled onto her side to increase the contact of the kiss. “If you aren’t awake by the time I get downstairs to get started on breakfast, I’ll have your coffee waiting.”

McCoy hummed, running his fingers through her hair. “Sometimes, I wonder what it would have been like if we had met in the Academy.”

“Things would have been different, certainly.” Her head skewed sideways in contemplation. “I know you still would have been on the Enterprise for Nero. And I still think you would have found a way to sneak Jim on board. Hell, I might have helped. _But_ ,” she quickly emphasized, “I like to believe that the universe found a way to course correct so that we all ended up on that ship together and that the chips falling as they did was the best way to make that happen.”

“I think about our prime counterparts a lot, too,” he admitted quietly. “Every time someone mentions the Ambassador or New Vulcan…”

“Leo, honey…” Danielle pressed her index finger over his lips to stop him from talking. “I adore you, but this is way too heavy of a conversation for this time of night.”

Leonard nodded once. “You’re right,” he agreed, starting to shift towards the edge of the bed. He felt foolish for even bringing it up. “Another time.”

“The ride to Yosemite is a little under four hours,” she continued to speak even as he stood and padded towards the door. “Lots of time to hypothesize then.”

McCoy paused with his hand on the doorknob and glanced back at her. “It’s a date.”

“Goodnight, Leo.”

“Goodnight, darlin’,” he drawled quietly and clicked off the light.

He stepped through the doorway and pulled the door shut behind him, but a voice to his right caused the doctor to freeze in his tracks. “ _Bones_?”

Leonard rapidly steeled himself and let his relaxed state be unraveled, a scowl settling into place. “Jim, it’s two in the mornin’. What the _hell_ are you doing roaming the halls?”

Kirk held up a sprig of mistletoe tied to a red string. “Just ensuring that I get my Christmas kiss from a certain doctor…”

Leo crossed his arms over his chest. “I sure as hell ain’t kissin’ ya, Jim,” he groused.

“Not _you_ , Bones.” Jim rolled his eyes, cocky smirk slowly sliding into place. “You’re not the only doctor in this house. And on the subject of the lovely doctor in question…” His forehead wrinkled. “Why were you in Danielle’s room at this hour of the night?”

The doctor merely stared at Jim for a moment, brain whirring as he tried to come up with a plausible excuse. “Because I’m a doctor, Jim,” he attempted to buy himself some time. “Like you said.”

“Well, _fuck me_ , Bones. I didn’t know you were a _doctor_. Why the hell didn’t you say so?” the captain shot back sarcastically.

“We all ate enough seafood tonight to feed a small humpback whale,” Leonard glossed over his sarcasm. “Surely, not even the famous Jim Kirk is immune to a stomachache every now and then.”

Jim’s tongue darted over his bottom lip. “So…” He folded his arms over the chest of his black cotton tee. “The big, bad Dr. Blake was done in by a little fish.”

“A _little_?” His eyebrows shot skyward. “I’m sorry… did you _not_ nearly vomit after that last bite of cod? Because I sure as _hell_ almost did.”

“Shhh!” Jim hushed him peevishly. “You’re going to wake her up and ruin my plan. Or worse, you’ll wake _Pike_ up.”

“ _Fine_.” Leonard brushed past Kirk. “But when she clocks you, don’t even think for _one second_ I’m healing any of the damage.”

“Don’t worry, Bones.” He clapped him on the shoulder. “By tomorrow morning, at least one of us will know what it’s like to kiss the third most eligible bachelorette in all of Starfleet.”

Leonard flipped Jim off with his back turned as he continued down the hallway, his trademark glower firmly set on his features. But once he was in the privacy of the guest room he’d set up camp in, his face smoothed over and allowed a grin to take over.

If he was being honest with himself, her right hook was definitely worth the experience.

* * *

T’was the morning of Christmas, when all through the house,   
not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;   
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,  
in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The adults were nestled all snug in their beds;  
while visions of starships danced in their heads;  
And Leonard in his guest room was snoring away,  
as was Chris Pike and Sam Blake early Christmas day;  
When out in the house there arose such a clatter,  
they sprang from their beds to see what was the matter.  
  
Away to the hallway they dashed like a bolt of lightning,  
tore open the doors and saw something quite frightening.  
Jim Kirk sprawled on the floor, holding his jaw,  
Danielle Blake standing above him, hair the color of straw,  
with green leaves and a fist so lively and quick,  
they knew in a moment how he’d gone down like a brick.

“James Tiberius Kirk!” Danielle gritted out through bared teeth. “I swear to _God_ , if those lips of yours come within six inches of mine ever again, I will _break_ your damn jaw next time. You will _not_ get a warning shot!”

“That was a _warning_ shot _?_ ” McCoy mumbled in disbelief as he surveyed Jim’s rapidly-swelling cheek.

“Oh, come on…” Jim scoffed, hand rubbing over the sore bone. “You don’t have to hide it… I know you were always curious.”

“ _Curious_?” Her eyes blazed. “ _Curious_? Are you out of your fucking mind, Jim?”

“For a minute there,” Kirk snorted as he scrabbled to a seated position, propped up against the wall, “I thought you were gonna say corn-fed and I would have required you being tested for Leonard McCoy contamination before letting you step foot back on my ship.”

McCoy promptly started choking, which earned him a glare from his somewhat secret girlfriend. “Sorry. Dry throat,” he tried weakly.

“Seriously, Blake. Look…” He gestured to Chris and Sam at one end of the corridor, failing miserably at concealing their amusement behind their hands. “Everyone else thinks it’s _funny_.”

Danielle folded her arms over her chest with a huff and stepped over Jim’s legs, stomping off down the hall. “I’m returning all your damn presents and giving you nothing but empty boxes.”

“Oh, the naughty list. Sounds like my kind of time.”

Her shrill scream of frustration reverberated painfully off the walls, threatening to shatter any glass within a quarter of a mile radius. Clearly, there was no shaming Jim Kirk, a fact Leonard McCoy could more than attest to after over three years of living with the kid.

* * *

Danielle carried her bag of presents on one arm and pulled her suitcase with the other as Leo trailed her into the apartment doing the same. Breakfast at Pike’s had been tense and uncomfortably quiet, with virtually everyone anticipating the blonde’s hard glares at Jim would turn into lasers and incinerate him at any given moment.

The annual gift exchange had gone a little better. By that point, Danielle’s gaze had merely smoldered and Jim’s risk of death had decreased immensely. The fact that he had given her Shakespeare paperbacks, along with the first phaser she had ever used on board the Enterprise in a case with a placard commemorating her promotion to Strategic Operations Officer, probably helped. And fortunately for the captain, the phaser had long been decommissioned.

Sam had noticed the necklace and complimented it, wanting to know where it came from. Danielle explained that she had picked it up on their last visit to Risa for a brief shore leave while she and Lieutenant Miranda had explored the straw market. Of course that was a blatant lie for Jim’s sake, but she would advise her sister of that later.

Leonard had made out pretty handsomely too, with gifts of fine liquor from Jim and Pike, a bourbon barbeque sauce gift set from Sam, clothing from the Blake sisters, a few 20th century medical books from Jim, and a new leather jacket from Chris, who’d insisted that every Californian must own one to deal with the seasons. And considering all the time he’d been spending there as of late, Leo was in dire need of one for the spring.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be able to explain to Uncle Chris just how _grateful_ Iam for what he bought you,” Danielle hummed lowly as she dropped the bags near the front door, turning to snake her arms around his waist. “I could have pulled you into the bathroom and had my way with you right then and there in that jacket…”

“Darlin’…” Leonard straightened, pulling back from her. “You know I’m crazy about you, but I’m gonna need you to brush your teeth _and_ gargle some mouthwash before I kiss you again.” He sighed heavily. “Aside from your pretty little mouth, I don’t know where Jim’s lips have been…”

“Ugh,” Danielle sputtered, wiping at her lips with the back of her hand. “That’s disgusting, Leo.” She grimaced, back pedaling away from him. “Go put your stuff down. I’ll be right out.”

When his girlfriend had disappeared into her bedroom and the sound of running water filled the apartment, he took the opportunity to start to unpack his bag of gifts. He had done an okay job of refolding everything, but an overnight stay in the bag would inevitably result in wrinkles and truthfully, he wanted to try on the jacket again.

He saved the item in question for last, only pulling it from its gift box once everything else was neatly folded on the coffee table.  Leo shrugged it onto his broad shoulders over his navy tee shirt, relishing the slide of the smooth cowhide over his skin. It hadn’t even been broken in yet and it fit him like he’d been born in the damn thing.

The water stopped running down the hall and Danielle’s voice soon replaced it, “Oh, I forgot! There’s one more present for you under the tree!”

“Do you want me to wait until you come back to open it?” he asked in reply.

“That’s okay, go head. I’m just changing out of these damn shoes before you have to amputate.”

With a chuckle, Leo walked around the couch and sure enough, spotted an oblong box in front of him, neatly wrapped in emerald paper embossed with gold swirls. He pulled it out from beneath the tree and dusted off a few errant pine needles before bringing it to the armchair to open.

He felt a little guilty ripping away the wrapping, considering all of the care Danielle had clearly taken, but his curiosity quickly overcame his lamentation. A clothing box laid beneath, filled with bright red tissue paper. At first, McCoy thought it was empty, but while rummaging, he grasped something that felt solid, but slightly flexible.

“Bunny ears?” He narrowed his eyes as he turned them over in his hand. “Darlin’, is this some kind of a joke?”

“Not a joke, sweetheart,” she purred from somewhere behind him and he whipped around in the chair to find her leaning against the wall, dressed in a very familiar red satin costume. “As you can see…” She pointed to the Santa hat atop her blonde curls. “I have no need for my bunny ears at the moment, so I figured I’d ask you to keep them safe for me.”

He was suddenly bombarded with images of a scarlet-clad Playboy bunny sitting on the edge of his desk, her gyrating above him as he remained rigid in one of the chair in his quarters, and later, the satin sliding over his skin as he pinned her beneath him on his bed.

“Darlin’, you’re gonna kill me,” he groaned as he rose from the chair. “Can I?” he asked softly, daring to take a few steps closer.

Her tongue darted over her lips, green eyes surveying him up and down. “On one condition.”

 _“Anything_.”

Her feet carried her backwards towards the bedroom, the unbridled desperation in his voice inciting her even more. “You have to wear that leather jacket all the fucking time.”

“Deal,” he agreed hurriedly, taking long, loping strides forward to follow.

Though, the promise was broken twenty minutes later as leather lay atop satin in a heap at the foot of the bed.

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again to my wonderful beta, Dana, for helping fix my typos and keeping me going. <3

"I'm fucking crazy about you," Leonard blurted out somewhere between Modesto and Yosemite.

They had been driving for the better part of three and a half hours to the cabin she had rented for the weekend of New Years Eve. For once, Danielle was in control of the vehicle, a nice change considering she tended to fidget if left in the passenger's seat for too long. It was a fact that McCoy had yet to learn and one she hoped he didn't for a fair while.

The Kirk comparisons would be unending.

The weekend held the promise of plenty to the couple. For one, they would be virtually unreachable unless there was an emergency and didn't have to worry about nosy neighbors, bumping into someone they knew on the street, or Jim dropping by her place without notice, as he was wont to do frequently.

There would be snow and a roaring fire, a soaker tub that could fit three people if need be (though two was their personal limit), and plenty of wine to go around. In a word, it would just be simply _romantic_.

And as they cruised down the highway in the SUV they'd borrowed from her godfather because her convertible was no match for snow, their weekend plans had consumed her quiet thoughts. Well, at least until a minute ago.

"What?" She blinked in confusion, eyes flitting between him and the road. "I mean, I'm crazy about you, too. But where did that come from, sweetheart?"

Leonard looked out the window. He didn't have trouble opening up to his girlfriend, even in the months before their more defined relationship began. But still, his failed marriage to Jocelyn and their relationship as a whole wasn't something he liked to talk about, outside of passing mentions during discussions of Joanna.

"I used to think Jocelyn was thoughtful," he remarked idly. "She didn't really give me gifts aside from holidays or our anniversary in high school, but about halfway through college, she would get me little things here and there. A sweater… a jacket… a shirt she saw while out shopping and thought I would like." He snorted derisively. "None of them were clothes I'd _ever_ buy myself, but it was a sweet gesture, so I wore them to make her happy." Leonard growled at a particular memory that he didn't wind up sharing. "And wouldn't you know it, that's exactly what she was banking on, Danielle. By the time I graduated med school, my wardrobe looked like something out of a country club and I had a single plaid shirt hidden at the bottom of a dresser that I'd rescued no fewer than a dozen times from the garbage."

"She wasn't buying you presents," Danielle surmised with a wince. "She was slowly molding you into what she wanted you to be."

"But I loved her." Leo let out a huff of air, angry with himself. "And I figured, 'what the hell.' You compromise in a relationship and she was brought up a certain way, with a fancy house and a staff. I couldn't give her that… I was just a poor med-student, so I could at least give her some semblance of that if I looked the part." He rubbed his hand over his neck, suddenly feeling ashamed of his behavior. "I saved up for a year to buy her engagement ring because it was what her father expected of me at that point, but God, when things were good with her… things were amazing. We made up just as passionately as we fought."

He grit his teeth and shook his head, both disappointed in his younger self’s behavior and the sudden realization of how awkward it was to talk to his current girlfriend about his relations with his former wife.

Yet, it didn't faze the blonde seated beside him. In fact, she would venture as far as to say that she was happy Leo felt comfortable disclosing more of the details of his past with Jocelyn if for no other reason that they could now be on the same page. Even if the thought of her boyfriend and his ex-wife sleeping together made her skin crawl, Danielle could be mature enough not to let it bubble to the surface.

Leo cleared his throat. "You're supposed to be with someone who compliments you as a partner, who helps you be a better version of yourself. She wanted to mold me into something I wasn't and I- I shouldn't have let it get as far as it did. _That_ is what continues to torture me, even after all this time."

"But you shouldn't-"

"I know," he interred with a heavy exhale. "Joanna is the only thing that keeps me from regretting it altogether. She helps me rationalize it all," he explained a bit hesitantly. "If I had to change, lose who I was just so that I could have my baby girl, I would do it all over again in a heartbeat."

Not sure of what to say, Danielle merely nodded and kept her eyes fixed on the road. She hadn't expected him to say anything different, but it didn't make her any more confident in a reply.

Leonard broke the dragging silence, finally turning his attention away from the window. "You're wondering where all of this came from, aren't you?"

"Yeah," she admitted, "a bit."

He sucked in a deep breath. "You never expect anything from me," he supplied then promptly winced. "Shit, no. That sounded bad." He roughly ran a hand through his hair. "Alright, take last April for example."

"Okay…" she drawled out, still a bit confused as she tried to recall what was so special about April. Her birthday was in April and they had certainly celebrated in their own way, but nothing in particular about the month stood out.

"You bought me the Lexican roller," he pointed out, "for my back."

Her face softened with recollection. "Oh, yeah. I remember that." She dipped her head. "You'd been slammed with marathon surgeries and were sore almost every time I saw you from standing so long."

"You wouldn't let me top for two weeks," Leonard tacked on with a wry smirk. "Not that I could complain about that aspect. I very much enjoyed the view."

She reached over and smacked his arm. "Incorrigible."

Leonard grabbed her hand before she could return it to the wheel, bringing it to his lips. "But you didn't buy me the roller because you were tired of topping, you did it because you thought it would help me."

"I told Christine to insist you use it, even if it meant lying on the floor of your office," she chuckled gently, changing lanes.

"Jocelyn would _never_ have done any of that. The thought wouldn't have even crossed her mind." Leo exhaled slowly. "You and I were just fooling around back then and you showed me more genuine concern and thoughtfulness than my wife ever had in eleven years."

A fissure shot straight through her heart. “I’m sorry,” Danielle whispered.

“Don’t be.” His thumb glided across her knuckles. “You asked me a while ago when I first knew that my feelings for you had changed from friendship to wanting more.  Do you remember?”

“How could I forget?” She was silent for a moment, then, “I ruined half a dozen eggs trying to get them just right in those damn cookie cutters before you woke up.”

The laughter that tumbled from his lips relieved some of the tightness in his chest. “At the time, I thought I was right in saying that it was the night I told you…”

He let the words trail off, unable to utter the same declaration he’d told her that evening. Admitting his darkest secret had taken every ounce of fortitude he had and a decent amount of tears, a scenario he didn’t wish to repeat again. But she _knew_ and still wanted to stick around, wanted more from him in the time thereafter. The rest of the sentence could remain unspoken.

“But the more I think about it, I don’t know if this was _ever_ casual for me after our first night together.”

His admission hung in the air for sometime, his heart lodged in his throat the longer the hush dragged on. And when she tugged her hand free from his, he thought it was going to suffocate him altogether.

His girlfriend was not oblivious to the fact. “It’s alright, Leo. I just need two hands to turn off the highway,” she reasoned. “Local roads aren’t always as clear.”

Her green eyes darted for just a moment and their brightness and clarity eased the vice. Though, his silence remained and hers accompanied it.

It lingered as the sprinkling of snow on the ground became thicker, denser, until everything that surrounded them was draped in a blanket of white. And persisted beyond, only broken occasionally by the GPS chirping directions in its frustratingly posh British accent.

Danielle couldn’t cope with the quiet anymore.

“I barely slept that first night after I left your quarters,” she confessed in a soft, uncharacteristically meek tone. “I kept thinking how much I regretted going along the suggestion of your place after the party.” She pressed forward, in spite of the paling of his face. “I wasn’t sorry for giving into temptation in your office, but I was mad at myself for going home with you that night.”

Leonard wasn’t sure he wanted an explanation as to why, but knew the curiosity would drive him crazy sooner or later. “Are you still?”

Her answer was firm and quick. “No.”

“Then why did you?”

“You were the brilliant, handsome Chief Medical Officer. Even if you could be a cantankerous prick a good portion of the time, most of the women and a good chunk of the men on this ship, human or otherwise, wanted to know what it was like.”

“To sleep with me?”

Her blush took him by surprise. “Yeah.”

“So that’s what it was to you that first time? A fuck for the sake of curiosity?” His temper flared.

 _“No_. That was the problem.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, lines settling into the grooves of his forehead. He had no idea how his sudden outburst of his increased feelings for her had spiraled so far out of control. “So it was a _pity_ fuck then?”

“ _Leonard_ ,” she gritted out and the use of his first name caused the doctor’s eyes to snap to her on his left. “Let me finish.”

It was then he realized how loud his sharp breaths through his nose were in the confined quiet. “Alright.”

“I’d had a crush on your for ages,” she finally conceded. “I was always attracted to you from a physical standpoint, yes. I mean, you were tall, dark, and handsome with hands and nerves of steel. Any girl would go weak in the knees over that.” She let out a derisive snort. “But it was your quiet strength in times of crisis- don’t look at me like that.” Her gaze found his for a fleeting moment. “You could bluster and bellow all you wanted, but I knew that was you trying to take control of a situation. That quiet strength comes into play more than you realize.”

“Like _when_?” he bit back dubiously.

“I watched you in the operating theater with Uncle Chris.” How she wished she were no longer driving so she could look at something, _anything_ beside the road or Leonard. “You were in there for fourteen hours trying to save his brain, his spine, his _legs_ … and I watched you for every second of it.”

“I never even knew you were watching,” he told her with complete bewilderment. “I thought when I saw you in his recovery room, it was the first time you’d been off shift since he came on board.”

“Jim insisted I go off-duty, in case…”

 _In case you had to say goodbye_ , Leonard finished for her in his own head. _In case decisions needed to be made. You were his next of kin._

She swallowed thickly, hoping to get rid of the lump in her throat. It didn’t work.

“It stopped being a superficial attraction after that.” She winced at how much it sounded like hero worship. “I mean, I’d always respected you as a colleague and a medical professional,” she insisted. “But those hands were no longer just steady, they healed even the deepest and most fatal of wounds. I knew-“ Danielle bit her lip. “I knew you’d gone through a lot of shit and I thought about how you deserved so much better than that. You take care of everyone on that ship, patch us up and deal with our physical traumas. Yet, there was no one to take care of _you_ \- to put you back together and assure you everything was going to be okay. I wanted to be that for you and deep down…” Her voice wavered and she took a deep breath. “I wanted you to put me back together, too.”

A hush fell over the car that seemed to drag on for miles, through the gates to Yosemite National Park. They came to a stop at the end of a gravel road, the stones crunching under the tires as the cabin stood before them, and just sat there. Neither made a move to open a door or so much as touch the other. Leo stared straight ahead, Danielle picked at her fingernails in her lap.

“Have I?”

She slowly turned her head, eyes somewhat glassy. “What do you mean?”

He took a deep inhale of air, as if he was mustering up the strength to look at her. Then he did. “Have I put you back together?”

“Mostly,” she answered with a nod after a moment’s consideration. “The rest of the pieces… I’m just not sure they’re ones that’ll ever fit in place again, but it’s nothing you can help. Some things are just…”

She thought of her mother and father, of years of being ignored and a childhood she was mostly deprived of, growing up too fast and learning what it meant to be a parent before she could so much as drive a car.

He thought of his father, of letting down the man he admired more than anything, watching his mother’s heartbreak send her to an early grave, missing so much of his baby girl’s life outside of comms and video calls and messages.

“Irreparable?” he offered, to which she nodded. “You should know… what you wanted to do for me? Putting me back together?” He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. “The things that you could, you did.”

She stared back at him soundlessly and it wasn’t until she felt an odd tickle on her cheek that Danielle even realized she was crying. She wiped at it with the back of her hand, sniffling.

“The reason I was mad at myself for going back to your place on Halloween wasn’t because I regretted sleeping with you. It was because when I laid down in my bed after, I realized how lonely I felt without you in it. I so desperately wanted to roll towards the other side of the mattress, feel the warmth of the sheet you’d left behind or find your smell on my pillow and it _wasn’t there_. I had _nothing_ to remember that feeling again.”

After staring at her slack-jawed, Leonard suddenly had the wherewithal to zip up his puffy jacket and pop open the passenger door. “Get out of the car,” he commanded firmly, though there was less of the growling _Dr. McCoy_ than the surety of _Leo_ behind it.

Dumbfounded by his insistence, she buttoned up her pea coat and followed suit. By the time she pocketed the keys and nudged the door shut with her hip, he was already in front of her in the cold mountain air.

Within seconds, his arms were tightly wound around her, pressing her against his chest.

“Sometimes, you’ll wake up and I’m not going to be there,” he told her in a gentle voice, though his drawl was no less pronounced. “We might be on different shifts or I fell asleep in my office again or I’m away on some mission. Maybe I’m even in Georgia while you’re in California.” He ran his cool fingers through her hair. “But whatever the reason, I want you to know that the first thing I’m going to do when I wake up is reach for you like you’re there. Because that’s what home is to me now, that’s what safety and warmth is to me.” He leaned back just enough to grasp her chin, lifting it so he could gaze down at her adoringly. “It’s you, Danielle.”

A sob broke free at his admission and at once, Leonard knew that her guard had completely fallen. She had never let him see her cry like this before, weep so openly and let all her vulnerabilities be revealed.

And it stirred something within Leonard McCoy that he hadn’t felt in _years_.

By the time the tears slowed to a near-stop, the doctors were near the point of shivering.

“Come on, darlin’,” he prodded, rubbing a hand in circles over the small of her back. “I didn’t pack nearly enough supplies to cure hypothermia,” he jested, fully knowing he actually _had_. “Let’s get our bags and go inside so I can impress you with my ability to start a fire.”

“That sounds nice,” she spoke for the first time in nearly ten minutes, taking the tiniest of steps back. “I do like it when your southern upbringing shines through.”

He relinquished his hold on her, taking a few careful steps in the snow to pop open the trunk. “I’m well aware, especially considering how much you try and get me to talk when I’m drunk or right after I wake up.”

She tugged her suitcase free, along with a small duffel. “Guilty as charged.”

“I don’t mind much,” he insisted while taking his own pair of bags. “You, Joanna, and Gran are the only people in the damn universe I can tolerate before coffee.”

“I’m glad I’m _tolerable_ ,” Danielle retorted with a roll of her eyes, elbowing him in the ribs.

Leo found it comforting that her acerbic wit had returned. “That’s more than I can say for Jim.”

“That’s more than _anyone_ can say for Jim,” she snorted, parallel lines flanking her footsteps as she dragged her case through the snow. “Come on. Let’s go inside. We can build ourselves a snowman later.”

Leo grinned back at her while shutting the trunk and started to follow. He was thankful that the driveway led right to the house, as he knew some cabins were often built into the side of mountains and required a slough of stairs to get to the front door.  This one’s entry was already open by the time he lifted his bags up the two porch steps, Danielle depositing her boots in the tray inside.

It was decently warm when he walked in, but Leonard knew a fire would make it a far more comfortable experience. He spotted the stack of firewood right next to the fireplace almost instantly as he plopped his boots beside hers.

“How about you go grab us a couple of drinks and I’ll get to work on that fire.”

“I’ve got a nice bottle of bourbon I’ll save for when the ball drops tomorrow,” she let him know as she stripped off her jacket and hung it on the coat rack. “And wine to go with meals. You okay with beer for now?”

“I’m always okay with beer.” He flashed her a bright smile and her stomach did a somersault.

A few minutes later, Leonard had gotten the fire up and roaring, while Danielle was milling about the kitchen. From what he could see, the cabin was as beautifully crafted and authentic as she’d described. The knotted wood used on the cabinets was an especially nice touch, as were the thin wooden panels used for the floor and the thicker ones that made up the walls.

There was a massive collection of holovids in what he assumed was the study, along with an equally large library of PADD books and games. Even the master bedroom, which he’d encountered upon carrying their suitcases in, was romantic with its thick-posted oak bed and a luxurious master bathroom that put her apartment’s to shame.

They were _definitely_ going to put the whirlpool tub to good use.

When he returned, she was waiting with a beer on the couch. Her slender fingers picked at the red label, tiny scraps of paper already littering the coffee table. “Hey,” she greeted him as she caught him enter from the corner of her eye. “Find anything interesting along your journey?”

“A lot of holovids,” he answered simply as he sunk onto the sofa beside her and accepted the beer she proffered. “The bedroom looked real nice, the bathroom even better.”

“Oh. So I’m guessing you saw the bathtub then.” She lifted a brow as she took a pull of her beer.

“I might have.” The look on his face was devious. “Gravity enhancers so the water never sloshes over the side.”

She batted her eyelashes innocently. “Really? I have no idea why that’s even remotely necessary.”

“I guess we’ll just to figure out what we need to do to trigger them.”

“I suppose.” Her eyes glinted back at him and she sidled closer to his warm body. “I’m really glad that we came here. I can’t imagine kicking off the New Year in a better way.”

Leonard looked down at her and slipped an arm around her shoulders to draw her nearer, brushing his lips against her temple. Forty-five minutes ago, he’d accused her of sleeping with him out of pity on Halloween and now, she was smiling at him and telling him how happy she was to be with him.

How the fuck he’d gotten so lucky with her, he still didn’t understand.

“Danielle,” he mumbled into her skin, the bridge of his nose resting against her hairline as he spoke. “At the risk of being as big of a dick as I was in the car, I need to ask you something. And if it upsets you, I’ll never mention it again. I just- I wanna be honest with you, darlin’. I don’t want to have any secrets.”

There was a rawness in his voice that was only matched by the vulnerability in his eyes once she regarded them, flecked with green and gold. She could never deny him, no matter how hard she tried.

“Since we’re not keeping secrets here, I’m going to be entirely honest and say that I’m a bit nervous about whatever it is you have to ask me.” Her laugh was half-hearted and failed to reach her eyes. “So you should probably get on with it.”

His question came quicker than she’d anticipate. “Would you be upset if I tell you about Jocelyn sometimes?”

Lines creased her forehead. “What do you mean?”

“Well…” He stared at her vacantly, trying to work out an explanation in his head. “Aside from all the general bitching I do, there are things I’d like you to know: stories from when we were younger, but those are mainly our failings. And occasionally, there are good memories I have with Jo that she was a part of. But I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable or put off by anything I might say.”

“Look, Leo…” Danielle turned in his arms and folded up her legs. She had to face him for this discussion, especially considering how greatly it seemed to trouble him. “I can’t ignore that you were with Jocelyn for over a decade. Your relationship with her and your marriage helped shape you into who you are now- good or bad.” She set her elbow against the back of the couch to prop up her head. “And that’s before we even get to talking about Joanna. I know that you’re a package deal; I knew that coming into this relationship. And guess what else?”

He raised a brow dubiously.

“I know that you and Jocelyn had sex. A _lot_ of it.”

An uncharacteristic blush tinted his cheeks. “Well…”

“ _Leo_.” Danielle grasped his shoulders. “I had sex before you, too. But being intentionally blind to each other’s past relationships isn’t going to do us any good. I _want_ you to be able to tell me what’s on your mind without worrying if I’m going to think less of you or whether you’re going to offend my sensibilities. And quite frankly, considering the fact that we first had sex on your desk and wrecked your office during our escapade to the point where I’m pretty sure it had to be sanitized from top to bottom, I find it funny you’re so concerned.”

“I already told you.” He cupped her cheek, the corner of his mouth lifting as she nuzzled into his hand. “I’m fucking crazy about you, Danielle. I don’t want to screw this up.”

“So then don’t.” She lifted her hand, turning her palm upright before letting it drop to her lap. “And you can start by not trying to protect me from yourself anymore. I chose to be with you, Leonard McCoy. I knew what I was getting into.”

Leonard studied her, hazel eyes searching her green ones for something. But he just wasn’t sure what he wanted to find. “Okay.”

“Okay.”

“So this starts right now then?”

“This very second.”

“Okay.” He winced. “Then, I guess I’ll kick off this new policy.” His hand ran roughly over his hair. “I think about Jocelyn a lot still, but not in the way you might think. It’s more abstract than that, actually. I wonder- I wonder what it would have been like if I’d met you first,” he finally confessed, feeling like the weight of an anchor had been lifted from his chest.

“You mean like… in high school?” she asked him with some confusion.

“The scenarios vary,” he clarified for her, trying to shed some light on his thought process. “Sometimes, you transfer to my high school for some reason or another and I never even look twice at Jocelyn at that dance. Other times, I bump into you at Ole Miss just as things with her start to fail and it makes me realize that there’s someone better for me out there.  We never even get married in those.”

A smile slowly spread across her face. She’d never envisioned herself with anyone other than Leo since they’d started sleeping together, certainly not once they’d committed to each other. And while Danielle had no delusions that Leonard would ever want to walk down the aisle again, having lost his faith in the institution long again, it gave her a bit of a thrill to think that in some parallel universe, they might be long-married with a family.

Then she suddenly realized the flaw in it all.

“But what about-“

“Joanna,” Leonard finished for her knowingly. “Part of the reason I can sleep at night is because I know that even if my marriage royally fucked me up in every way possible, that little girl was worth every ounce of suffering. I wouldn’t trade her for anything.”

 _But that doesn’t mean I don’t dream that you were her mother, not Jocelyn_ , he added silently, ashamed at the thought.

“You know…” The corner of Danielle’s mouth twitched. “If we _had_ met each other much earlier on, it couldn’t have been in high school. You’re six years older and I didn’t skip ahead until the seventh grade. We’d have only been able to meet in college,” she pointed out.

Leo’s face suddenly paled. “You started college when you were sixteen. That means…”

“You would have been a senior and twenty-two.” Her lips twisted into a smirk. “Dirty old man.”

McCoy nearly choked. “I- um- I mean-“ he sputtered, eyes darting everywhere but her face.

Danielle’s laughter bubbled over, her shoulders shaking as she climbed into Leo’s lap. “It appears I just freaked the hell out of the unflappable, big, bad Dr. McCoy.” She grinned triumphantly and looped her arms around his neck. “I think I deserve a cookie.”

Leonard felt his pulse start to slow from frantic to elevated. “I didn’t bring any cookies.” He set one hand on her hip. “Would you take a kiss instead?”

“Only if it’s a really, _really_ good one,” the blonde challenged.

“Well then.” Leo tipped back his beer, swallowing it in a pair of gulps. Then he set it down on the table to give her his full focus, letting his left hand join his right. “I guess I’m really going to have to give you my undivided attention.”

She lifted her chin petulantly. “I will not accept anything less.”

“Darlin’…” He drawled lowly, sending a bolt of lust through her body. “The things you do to me.”

Danielle was just about to inquire what those things were, but was estopped by the slant of his mouth against hers. The kiss was positively filthy, with just the right amount of pressure, the insistent swipe of his tongue across her lips as one of his hands tangled in her hair and the other splayed across her lower back.

Soon, her body was tightly pressed up against his, hands fisted in the back of his plaid shirt as she gently rocked her hips. Leonard groaned loudly and tore his lips away from hers.

“Darlin’, wait…” he implored through ragged breaths. “I need to tell you something.”

“Leo…” she complained impatiently, her forehead pressed against his. “Can’t it wait?”

He shook his head. “It can’t. I meant to tell you in the car and then-“

“I’ve got it, I know.” She inhaled a steadying breath. “But you’ve got to make this fast or I might just have to kill you.”

He chuckled, something that frustrated her to no end. He had to admit her resultant growl was a bit scary.

“Look,” he started, voice a little more sturdy and serious. “I don’t know why you picked me. I’m ornery and cantankerous and I’m an old man past his prime, quite honestly. “

“An old man?” she groaned. “Not _this_ again…”

“It’s _not_.” He fixed her with a hard stare and she promptly stopped complaining. “What I’m trying to say is that you’re smart and funny and caring and sincere and beautiful… and all these things that I’m so undeserving of. And it makes me wish I could give you the best years of my life, but those are behind me now, darlin’. I _can’t_.”

“Putting aside how ridiculous you are for saying such a thing about yourself…” Her fingers shifted to curl over his shoulders. “You are the only man in my life who’s ever stuck around. Hell, the only _person_ who stuck around who wasn’t family, though that seems to matter more to some than others.” She shook off the thought of her parents. They didn’t deserve to be mentioned in such a moment. “You don’t realize what that means to someone like me, that I was enough for you to stay.”

The fact that anyone would want to leave a woman like her behind, to hurt her, amazed him. There was no excuse for what her parents had done for all those years. She had grown up too fast and missed out on too much.

“I’m not leaving,” Leonard whispered, feeling his throat tighten around the words dying to break free. He carefully retracted his strong hands from around her body to run them over her alabaster cheeks, slightly rough against her silky skin. His kiss-swollen lips spread into a warm, adoring smile and his hands stilled. “Danielle, I love you.”

She was immeasurably grateful she wasn’t holding her beer anymore or they definitely would have a hazard on their hands.

“Y-you love me?” Danielle asked incredulously, staring into the hazel eyes glimmering in the light of the fire.

The question made him wonder whether he’d picked the wrong time to say those three little words, her face having gone a bit slack in response. He bit his lip and pulled back just a fraction. “That I do.”

The truth was there was so much the scientist loved about him. She loved his smile, his eyes, and his laugh. She loved his wit, his humor, his southern charm. And as she grinned at him, leaning into the touch of his hand, Danielle Blake realized one more thing about Leonard McCoy: “I love you too, Leo.”

The smiled that burst across his features felt like it was going to split him in two. “God, woman. I thought I was going to have a stroke there for a minute.”

“Shut up and kiss me,” she mumbled, surging forward to deal with the challenge herself.

His fingers slid beneath the hem of her violet sweater, stroking along the soft skin until they could find the clasp of her bra. It popped open with a single twist of his fingers and he couldn’t help the smirk that pulled against her lips at her pleased groan.

And neither doubted it would be the last time either heard such a noise for the remainder of the day.

* * *

They tried to make it off the couch, they really did. For starters, the condoms were still in Leonard’s suitcase and they were of no use to the couple while still in the package. And that was as good of an incentive as any, truthfully. The massive, soft bed was another alluring detail. So was the jetted tub they had discussed earlier.

Yet, every time Danielle possessed the wherewithal to tug him into the bedroom, Leonard grabbed her and spent plenty of time convincing her not to move again. Deprived of some of his tricks, he had many more at hand- and mouth- to keep her at bay.

He figured once she was spent, he could coax her into the bedroom she’d been so eager to drag him off to twenty-five minutes before. However, as it turned out, his girlfriend had other ideas and promptly hauled him up to his knees to return the favor.

Whereas she’d been so lost to her pleasure, her eyelids had fluttered closed, half of his enjoyment came solely from watching her.

By the time they finally laid in a naked and tangled heap on the sofa, both were utterly spent and unwilling to move.

“So much for the bedroom,” Danielle snorted in a distinctly unladylike fashion as she traced hearts over his chest with her index finger.

Leonard’s chest rumbled. “Still better on my back than a desk.”

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Got any Jacks?” Scotty slurred as he leaned over his hand of playing cards, his cheeks pinkened by the alcohol.
> 
> “Meester Scott,” Chekov addressed him, not a curl out of place, “I believe you are thinking of the wrong game. We are playing poker.”
> 
> He furrowed his brows. “You mean we’re not playing Go Fish?”
> 
> “No, dear.” Danielle pressed the back of her hand to her mouth to stifle her laughter. “We’re not. Sorry.”
> 
> “Oh, well.” He glanced down at his rapidly dwindling stack. “That would explain a lot.”

Jim Kirk had never been a fan of birthdays. His most recent one started off by waking up in bed alone, the woman he’d brought home the night before having slipped out of his apartment at some point while he was asleep.

 _The perfect way to kick off number twenty-six_ , he had thought to himself. _Add her to the list._

He was actually impressed later on that he’d managed to avoid the beer in his refrigerator until noon when he’d flipped on the television to see the coverage of Remembrance Day. His father’s photograph was repeatedly plastered across the news networks, followed by his own. As much as he hated to admit it, to give credence to his theory that his mother’s distance had grown over the years the more Jim grew up to resemble George, the similarities were striking.

He wondered if Sam bore as strong a resemblance to their father as he did. Though, the notion that he might not recognize his older brother if he bumped into him on the street startled him more than he cared to admit.

Jim didn’t know where Sam was anymore, not in years. He’d wandered into his new, bright and shiny office at Starfleet Headquarters to find gifts and letters sprawled out across his desk and shelves. To this day, only one envelope stood out to him. It wasn’t even addressed to the cadet or the captain, just held a card that read _‘Jimmy, Glad you’re ok. – Sam’_

Over a year later, Jim still didn’t know whether hearing from his brother was better than not hearing from him at all.

It was just short of Happy Hour when his doorbell rang and he found Danielle Blake on his doorstep with three boxes of pizza and Leonard McCoy standing behind her with an armful of paper bags that could only have come from a liquor store.

The following afternoon, the three woke up fully-dressed in Jim’s bed in various states of sprawl. Leonard was face down across the foot of the mattress and Jim was laying diagonally, feet draped over the older man’s back. Danielle was perpendicular to the doctor, his arm thrown over her ankles, while Jim’s forehead was pressed between her shoulder blades. It was as pathetic a heap of skin and bones as they’d ever seen.

“This was not my idea of a threesome,” Jim remarked, earning pained groans from his companions.

Three hyposprays later, the trio was sitting in a diner indulging in the best hangover food they could find and knocking back glasses of water like they were being exiled to the desert.

This year would be different though. The Enterprise was deployed the morning of Jim’s birthday on a geological mission to a Class P planet three days away. On the one hand, Jim was grateful that he’d miss the bombardment of Remembrance Day coverage. However, he couldn’t just bury his head under his pillows and drink until the day was over. He was Captain and he still had his job to do.

Danielle took it upon herself to plan a different kind of distraction this year. There would be no party of course, but instead, she planned a poker night for Jim and his closest friends on board the ship. There would be a spread of his favorite foods that she’d programmed the recipes for into the replicators, plenty of non-synthesized bottles of liquor she swore she did not know were on the ship until that morning, and enough company to keep him in better spirits.

However, she hadn’t planned on Jim getting three glasses in before he’d even shown up to his observatory.

“It’s _boys’_ night,” Jim lamented with a heavy sigh, blue eyes glassy from his buzz. “Danielle Blake and Nyota Uhura are _not_ boys.”

“So sweet of you to notice, Captain,” Nyota retorted with an elegant arch of her eyebrow.

“Gee, Jim. With your knack for anatomy, I’ll never know why you went command track instead of medical,” Leonard remarked with a lift of his whiskey glass.

Jim rolled his eyes. “They probably don’t even know how to bet.”

“ _You_ figured it out,” Sulu piped up, earning choking laughter from the CMO.

“Spock…” Jim sank into a chair at the angular table. “Tell them they can’t come. Order them not to come!”

No one could be sure whose face had blazed more with rage: Uhura’s or Blake’s.

“Captain,” Spock returned coolly, “I do not believe it would be in either of our best interests to do so. Additionally, I do not understand why having Lieutenant Uhura and Dr. Blake participating in the game would be unwise.”

“Really? You think?” McCoy grumbled around the lip of his tumbler.

Jim waved him off. “It is a well-known rule that there are no women allowed on poker night.”

“I am unaware of such a rule.”

Jim groaned helplessly, sinking petulantly into his chair.

Nyota, on the other hand, plucked her plate of food from the table and swiftly turned on her heel. “On second thought, I did not get nearly as much rest tonight as I would have liked prior to this little get together, so I’m going to call it an early night.” Her jaw clenched. Feeling sorry for the captain did not require her to be on the receiving end of his belligerent behavior. “Gentlemen, Danielle…” She dipped her head to address each in turn as she strode towards the door. “Oh. And happy birthday, _Captain_ ,” she called out flippantly on her way out of the room in an attempt to unsettle Jim.

It worked.

* * *

“Got any Jacks?” Scotty slurred as he leaned over his hand of playing cards, his cheeks pinkened by the alcohol.

“Meester Scott,” Chekov addressed him, not a curl out of place, “I believe you are thinking of the wrong game. We are playing poker.”

He furrowed his brows. “You mean we’re not playing Go Fish?”

“No, dear.” Danielle pressed the back of her hand to her mouth to stifle her laughter. “We’re not. Sorry.”

“Oh, well.” He glanced down at his rapidly dwindling stack. “That would explain a lot.”

“I say if the man wants to play go-fish while the rest of us play poker, it’s his right to do as he wants!” Jim declared with a smack of his hand on the padded lip of the table, jostling his chips.

“Kid.” Leonard winced and shook his head. “Do you ever stop and listen to yourself?”

“I do, thank you very much!” His eyes narrowed at Danielle next to McCoy. “Unlike some people who just don’t listen to me.”

“Wow, Jim.” She fanned out her hand in front of her again. “With 20th century beliefs like that, I can’t imagine why some lucky woman hasn’t figured out a way to lock you down quite yet.”

Jim’s jaw clenched, blue eyes blazing. “Oh, fuck you, Blake. You’re not my mother. Of all the people to pass judgment on me, you certainly aren’t in a position to be one of them.”

The room was silent almost instantly. Sulu and Chekov exchanged worried glances, though Spock’s face remained as impassive as ever.

“ _Excuse me_?” she snapped at him.

Jim threw his cards face down on the table. “You fucking heard me, Blake. We all put up with you being here to be nice, but I sure as _shit_ am not going to sit here and be lectured by you on my behavior or my personal life.”

Leo lightly grasped Jim’s arm. “Take it easy, kid. She was just joking.”

He batted his hand away. “ _No_. Tell me, Blake… when was the last time _you_ were in a relationship? Oh, that’s right.” He smirked. “You went on two dates with our illustrious former Chief Engineer Olsen before he went and got himself incinerated.”

Danielle swallowed thickly as she stared back at Jim. No matter how drunk anyone at the table was, the wounded look in her eyes was as clear as day.

She’d admitted to dating Olsen to Jim in confidence. He’d inquired of his engineering team as to whether he needed to notify a significant other in addition to his kin of his unfortunate, but heroic demise. The newly-minted captain had been shocked to hear the then-Chief Engineer had gone on a handful of dates with his weapons specialist, promoted to Strategic Operations Officer in the field just as so many had been unexpectedly elevated.

Jim swore he would never say anything, especially in light of the fact that Olsen’s family didn’t even know about her, and offered his condolences. He’d earned her utmost respect in that moment, wrapping his arms around her as she mourned the death of Olsen, but also worried incessantly about the man currently in the surgery theater.

Apparently, drunk Jim didn’t keep the promises sober Jim made.

“You and I are more alike than you’d like to believe, Dr. Blake. Everyone leaves us.” He leaned forward to fold his hands on the table. “Now get the _fuck_ off of my back.”

“Jim!” Leo barked at him, a deadly glare seeping through his hazel eyes. “That’s _enough_.”

Blake pushed back her chair and unsteadily made her way to her feet with her vodka cranberry in hand, ice clattering against the side with the trembling of her fingers.

“Well, I believe that’s my cue to leave,” she mumbled, averting her gaze.

“Oh, you _think_?”

She ignored Jim’s snippy comment and pushed her chair in, not even bothering with her chips. McCoy’s body moved the slightest fraction as if to follow her, but she found his eyes for just a fleeting moment to shake her head the tiniest fraction.

Leonard felt helpless. On the one hand, he wanted to grab Jim by the neck and throw him up against the wall. Maybe knock some sense into him, force him to apologize. But on the other hand, getting so emotional would tip everyone off in the room that something now ran deeper between CMO and SOO than the cords of friendship.

By her dismissal of his aid, Danielle effectively reinforced that thought.

“Have a pleasant evening, gentlemen,” she bid them meekly and then shuffled out the door.

* * *

An hour later, Leonard finally mustered up the fortitude to leave. He’d spent the better part of that time debating whether to chase after his girlfriend to comfort her, exposure be damned. Yet, he also knew that if he let the cat out of the bag in a moment of her weakness, she’d never forgive him.

So he stayed, listened to Jim’s drunken rants and boasts, until he couldn’t take it anymore.

“I’m calling it a night,” he declared, blunting out his cigar in the ashtray. “I’m getting too old for this shit.”

“One of these days, Bones, we’ve gotta get you laid.” Jim’s grin was lopsided. “It’ll take ten years off you, I swear.”

“Do you _really_ think I’ve been celibate since my divorce, Jim?” he sighed.

Jim’s reply was lightning fast. “ _Yes_.”

McCoy wiped a hand over his tired features. “Goodnight, Jim.”

* * *

Danielle didn’t miss Greg Olsen anymore. In fact, she felt more than a little guilty that she hadn’t thought about him at all in such a long time. He had been a nice young man, even if he was a bit brash, though he never meant anything by it. She couldn’t help but laugh at some of his ridiculous Australian expressions, but perhaps that was part of his charm.

Oddly enough, it was her father who had first introduced her to the engineer. Olsen had spent a semester abroad on his ship, the U.S.S. Capricorn, during his last year at the Academy, which had been her first. John had brought Olsen to Pike’s for a dinner with what she knew to be the sole intention of fixing them up. At the time, she was a lowly first year and Olsen a star cadet he’d taken a shine to, so it hadn’t worked out back then.

Then she’d spent the fall semester of her third year on board the USS Farragut, where Greg served as second engineer on the ship. He was the only person she knew on board and they quickly reconnected, spending many nights staying up for hours talking in Ten Forward over replicated snacks.

The day the Farragut returned to mark the end of the semester and her time on board, the blond had asked her to dinner the next time their downtime coordinated. They’d managed a meal and a movie for Valentine’s Day and another over Easter weekend, keeping in touch via PADD messages before and in-between.

On the second date, Greg had disclosed that Pike had requested his promotion to Chief Engineer on the Enterprise when she was finally commissioned. She was thrilled for him, not only because of his personal success, but because she eventually hoped to wind up there someday, too. Plus, she had all the faith in Christopher Pike to keep his crew safe. They’d been friends first, romantic partners later, so it wasn’t unreasonable for her to be concerned for his well-being.

Then Nero happened and he was gone in a flash. She’d barely ever had time to grieve and when she did, she felt guilty that it hadn’t been as much as he deserved.

But Danielle Blake had never loved Greg Olsen, never really had the chance to. She liked him, cared for him. Yet, he hadn’t meant to her as much as, say, Leonard did now. She didn’t depend on him emotionally, didn’t feel a pronounced pull when they were together that worsened when they were apart.

She’d mourned the loss of what could have been in the months after his death, but she understood why she no longer thought about Olsen. Her lost chance at love with Greg was not her last chance altogether.

Now, she had Leo and all the love and affection she’d always craved.

The thought made her feel even guiltier.

* * *

_0-4-0-3-3-3_

The keypad outside Danielle’s door flashed angrily at Leo, lighting up red. His brows furrowed; that _was_ her code. He was certain.

He tried again.

_0-4-0-3-3-3_

The same result occurred. Yet, upon closer inspection, he noticed a message scroll across the bottom of the fiber optic screen.

_Do Not Disturb mode activated. Override code required for entry._

He lifted his index finger to tap in the twelve digits that composed his override code, when he stopped mid-air.

Danielle knew that he would likely come looking for her. Even so, she’d engaged the do not disturb mode. Clearly, she wanted to be alone.

It would be an egregious overstep of their boundaries and her vestige of trust in him to use his code now. As much as Leonard wanted to comfort her, to tell her that Jim was a miserable fuckhead who deserved a good punch in the face, he just _couldn’t_.

Instead, he turned and traveled six doors down the corridor to his quarters, where he laid alone in a bed, for the first time since they’d started dating.

And it was _fucking_ miserable.

* * *

When the door to Leonard’s quarters swished open a little after three in the morning, he didn’t even stir. He didn’t move a muscle when he heard light footfalls draw closer and halt at his bedside, nor when the blanket was peeled back from the other half of the bed.

It wasn’t until the body slipped into the bed to curl up against him that he let himself give into the instinct to reach for the woman. McCoy coiled an arm around her waist to draw her back against his chest, whereupon she tucked her knees to curl up with him in silence.

Danielle wasn’t ready to talk about her argument with Jim, not yet anyway. All she wanted was the comforting embrace of the man she loved.

When Leo whispered those three little words into her ear, she knew he understood.

* * *

The next time the doctor awoke, it was a little after eleven am and he was grateful he’d insisted all poker night participants be given the following day off for their mental health. Spock was the only exception, having refused in light of his Vulcan physiology and ability to rapidly metabolize alcohol. Oddly, the thought of at least him on the bridge was comforting.

He felt a gentle tickle along his wrist and realized that his girlfriend was also awake. “Hey, darlin.’” His head dipped so he could graze his lips over the back of her neck.

“I love you.” She slowly rolled in his arms. “I should have said it last night. I’m sorry.”

“The only one who should be apologizing is probably nursing a massive hangover somewhere.”

“But I-“

“ _No_.”  He smoothed back her flaxen mane. “Do you really think I don’t know you love me? You were upset last night, Danielle. Deservedly, still are. I’m not petty like that; I’m not holding anything against you.”

Her gaze still downcast, she traced lines between the freckles on his bicep. “I know a lot about your history with Jocelyn, Leo. I should have told you about Greg.”

“Jocelyn was my wife and will always be the mother of my child.” He tucked a loose strand behind her ear. “You went out with the guy on a handful of dates. It’s apples and oranges, sweetheart.” He tipped his head to kiss her smooth forehead. “Besides, I never told you about the girls I went on a date or two with here or there in high school and the Academy. Things didn’t work out and honestly, it really has no bearing on our relationship. My mama taught me it’s ungentlemanly to discuss exes with your partner.”

Green eyes scrutinized him. “Where they hell did they come up with you?”

Leonard’s laughter rumbled through his chest and gentle shook the bed. “Drunk off my ass in East Bumblefuck, Iowa. All your uncle’s doing.”

“Never quite understood how you got all the way from Atlanta to Riverside without hopping a shuttle.”

“I came home from my shift at the hospital to find police cars in front of my house. I was afraid something horrible had happened, but in reality, she was waiting with divorce papers and an order to vacate the premises within an hour.” He let out a huff. “Said whatever I didn’t take with me, she’d box up and send to Gran. Hell, I was too ashamed to face my grandmother, so I took my suitcases and jumped onto the first bus out of town.”

“East Bumblefuck, Iowa?”

“East Bumblefuck, Iowa,” he confirmed. “You know the rest.”

“Right up to where your blonde girlfriend was a total idiot for letting Jim Kirk get under her skin.”

“How about the part where I laze around in bed with her for most of the day and cook for her?”

Her lips twitched. “Ooh. A new chapter?”

“Untitled and unreleased.” Leo splayed his hand over the flimsy fabric of the tee shirt draped over her spine. “I can give you a sneak peek, if you’d like.”

Danielle hummed as she adjusted her head on the pillow. Even though it wasn’t the half he typically slept on, the linen smelled distinctly of spearmint and Old Spice. “I do _love_ your work.”

“What can I say?” He grazed his nose along the length of her jaw and mouthed at her throat. “I have an _incredible_ muse.” After a playful nip, he pulled back a tiny bit. “And I should really get up and moving so I can get started on that breakfast.”

“If you _must_ ,” she sighed dramatically.

His PADD beeped as he peeled himself from the bed and Leonard cast a glance over at the flashing screen.

“Jim’s looking for you,” he noted idly, bare feet padding over the cool black tile on his way into the bathroom.

“Let him keep looking.” She scowled. “On a scale of one to ten, how pissed do you think the admiralty would be if I rigged his door to explode?”

“A solid five.”

“A five?” She sat to settle back against the headboard. “How do you figure?”

There was the sound of a toilet flushing and a running faucet before her boyfriend emerged from behind the closed door.

“Half of them are just waiting for Jim to cock this whole thing up so they can toss him out on his ass, so they’d be a one, but only because a zero isn’t in play,” he reasoned nonchalantly en route to the replicator. “The other half loves having him as their poster child for Starfleet, so they’d be a ten. Average the two together and you get five.” He paused at the appliance to smirk over his shoulder. “Surely, they taught mean, median, and mode at Stanford, Dr. Blake.”

“Ole Miss would strip you of your doctorate if they knew about this _abysmal_ bedside manner of yours,” she groused and chucked a pillow at his head.

He blocked it with his forearm. “Temper, temper,” Leonard chided while tapping on the screen. “Though, I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t a turn on.”

“Jesus, McCoy. It’s a good thing you and Kirk don’t bunk together anymore or you’d be hopeless.”

“You’d just be walking funny to shift every morning.”

Color flooded her cheeks. “Your nonchalance frightens me.”

“Good,” he purred, crooking four fingers in her direction. “C’mere. I need my favorite distraction while I’m cooking. Just won’t taste as good if I’m not preoccupied.”

She threw off the blankets and cocked a sardonic brow. “IS that what I am to you? A distraction… a preoccupation!?!” she scoffed with mock indignation.

He closed the sizable gap between them to stoop a little, wrapping his arms around the blonde’s lower body so that his forearms were pressed firmly against the swell of her ass. He hoisted her into the air and she instantly started laughing as she towered over him. “My _favorite_ distraction.”

Her fingers found purchase on the back of his neck. “I love you.”

Leo set her down on the counter, mouth twitching. Her hand uncoiled from his neck to press her index finger to his lips. “Don’t you dare Han Solo me.”

His grin was downright Cheshire-like. “Me? _Never_.”

She pulled her hand back. “Go on, then.”

He nudged her legs open so he could stand between them. “With what?”

“Say it.”

Leonard shrugged.

She poked him square in the chest. “ _Say it._ ”

“I know not of which you speak.”

“A poet now, huh?” She fixed her gaze on him. “ _Leonard. Horatio. McCoy._ ”

McCoy clutched at his chest. “Thou has wounded me.”

“You think that’s bad? I’m thirty seconds from breaking your nose, Shakespeare.”

Laughter rumbled through him. “Riled up?”

She pouted. “You’re doing this on purpose.”

“Absolutely.” He cupped her cheek with his slightly rough palm. “I love you,” he soothed, kissing her forehead. “Your smile, your laugh, even that petulant pout you’re working on right now,” Leo teased. “I love everything about you, but _especially_ this.” His arms slipped around her slender waist. “How you fit right here.”

“Fucking sap,” she accused, with absolutely zero malice behind her words.

“Shh… you’ll ruin my reputation.”

* * *

After a satiating breakfast that included a western omelet and hash browns. Danielle fell asleep, curled up in a tight ball in Leonard’s bed. Her body was still worn down from the aggravation of the night before and weeks of working past her shift.

Having a slightly more restful few nights in a row, the CMO decided to get a bit further ahead in his paperwork so they could enjoy the uncharacteristic day off a little more after she awoke. He was just a few words shy of finishing up a message to Dr. Boyce when the doorbell sounded. A quick check of the computer indicated that Commander Spock was on the other side and he quickly prepared himself for what would inevitably be a frustrating discussion with the First Officer.

“Darlin’,” Leonard cooed, warmly kissing her cheek. “Spock’s here to see me. I’m gonna close the door so you can go back to sleep.”

She mumbled something incoherent, followed by what sounded like “N’m hi?”

“No, sweetheart,” he chuckled softly and grazed her forehead with his lips. “I don’t need you to hide. Just stay in here and sleep. I’ll come back when he’s gone.”

“M’kay,” Danielle murmured drowsily and burrowed back into his pillow.

It took him a full two minutes to wipe the grin off his face before meeting Spock at the door. Surely, the hobgoblin would know something was amiss in the event McCoy appeared pleasant, of all things. Truthfully, he didn’t know if the Vulcan had _ever_ even seen him smile.

“Dr. McCoy,” Spock greeted him coolly, hands clasped behind him in the doorway.

“Mr. Spock,” Leonard drawled in reply. “What can I do for you?”

“The discussion I would like to have with you is of a sensitive nature and best addressed in private,” he replied with a slight tilt of his head. “May I come in?”

Leo ran a hand over his face; he was _definitely_ not ready to undergo a few rounds of debating logic with the First Officer, but he really didn’t have much of a choice without raising suspicion.

He gestured into the room and stepped back to allow Spock passage, closing the door behind him.

“I’m guessing this is something that couldn’t be addressed during my normal shift hours in Medbay?” he presupposed with a sigh.

“The Captain is concerned that you have not replied to any of his numerous messages this morning and believes you to be angry with him,” Spock relayed. “He requested that I meet with you immediately to confirm his suspicions, though, I do not believe that serving as messenger falls within my scope of duties. However, as captain, I defer to his judgment.”

“I notice you didn’t say _better_ judgment.”

“I did not.”

Leonard snorted. “You don’t pull any punches, do you, Spock?”

The Vulcan cocked his head curiously. “I generally tend to avoid violence unless absolutely necessary.”

“Sure you do.” He pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “Look, I had trouble sleeping last night, so I’d like to try and make up for that after a nice, long shower.  If you don’t mind, I’d appreciate it if you got to the point of your visit.”

“As I previously mentioned, Dr. McCoy, the Captain is adamant that you are upset with him for his behavior yesterday evening.”

“You’re damn right I am,” he growled. “Dr. Blake went through all the trouble of setting up a poker night for Jim to take his mind off of his birthday, which you and I _both_ know isn’t amongst his favorite days of the year, and he was a complete _ass_ to her and Lieutenant Uhura. Surely, his treatment of her angered you, as well.”

Spock dipped his head in agreement. “I was not appreciative of the way he spoke to Nyota from a professional perspective as her superior officer. However, the nature of our personal relationship dictates that I should have been offended by her mistreatment.” He unclasped his hands to tuck his PADD against his side. “Surely, you can understand that perspective, Dr. McCoy.”

McCoy crossed his arms over his chest, brow furrowed deeply. “If you’ve got something to say, Spock, just come out and say it.”

“Because of the nature of your relationship with Dr. Blake,” Spock explained further, “you were put in the same position at the gathering that I was. The captain insulted your partner and before you could intervene, she departed early.”

“If Uhura hadn’t smartly gotten the _hell_ out of dodge before shit hit the fan, I’d have reacted exactly the same.”

“Then perhaps you can explain to me why Dr. Blake is sleeping in your bed if your relationship is strictly platonic.” He arched a brow at Leonard. “The ship’s computer indicates she’s here, which was why Captain Kirk dispatched me.” He gestured to the depths of his quarters. “Yet, she is not present in any of the main rooms and your bedroom door is shut. If she was merely using the restroom, you would have no reason to close the door to your bedroom to speak with me.”

Leonard’s jaw clenched as he fixed Spock with a hard stare. He could continue to deny it all he wanted, but the Vulcan had already deduced that he and Danielle were an item. There was no use trying to convince him otherwise.

However, there were other complications to be considered. His blatantly honesty, for one.

“What is it that you want from me then, Spock?” McCoy threw up his hands in exasperation. “You gonna lecture me on professional conduct between senior officers? Tell me that you’re going to file a report with the admiralty?” His forehead creased deeper. “In case you haven’t noticed, Danielle and I are two consenting adults and what we choose to do, and not to do, together is nobody’s business but our own.”

“Quite the contrary, Dr. McCoy.” His long, slender fingers curled around the edge of his PADD. “If the captain had not encountered us in a relative moment of intimacy, it is highly probable that Nyota and I would not have disclosed our relationship to him for some time. May I inquire how long you and Dr. Blake have been romantically involved?”

“Uh…” He scratched at the back of his neck. “It’s fairly complicated to really determine… but, uh… I guess for the sake of discussion… fifteen months.”

“In those fifteen months, neither you, nor Dr. Blake have failed to maintain a level of professionalism expected of all senior officers. The mere fact that you have been involved for more than a year without anyone believing that your relationship was anything more than collegial prior to today is a testament to your dedication to your jobs.”

“Stop complimenting me, Mr. Spock. It makes me uncomfortable.”

“As you wish, Doctor.”

They fell into painful silence for a few, dragging moments.

“So… just to be clear, you’re _not_ going to tell Jim about Danielle and I?”

“Though I am Vulcan, I am also half-human,” he supplied by way of explanation. “And I understand the need for discretion on occasion.”

The CMO let out a relieved breath. “I appreciate that, Mr. Spock.”

The First Officer took his words as a cue to leave, turning back towards the door. “Good afternoon, Dr. McCoy. Please send my regards to Dr. Blake and my apologies for yesterday evening.”

“Not on your shoulders, Spock. Give my best to Lieutenant Uhura.”

“Very well.” Spock nodded courteously and was gone.

The Georgian shut the door behind him and leaned back against the metal panel, running his hands roughly through his dark hair.

What the actual _fuck_ had just happened?

Whatever it was, it could at least wait to be discussed until his girlfriend woke up from her nap.

Probably.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She laughed in spite of herself. “Come on, sweetheart. It was pretty decent of him. Human, almost.”
> 
> “I know.” The man shuddered. “It makes me extremely uncomfortable.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those of you who have commented on this story! I enjoy all of your opinions and interacting with you all!
> 
> And as always, thank you to my lovely beta, Dana.

“Wait…” Danielle scrambled into a seat position on the couch. “ _What_ ?”

Leonard pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “Spock knows about us. He figured it out.”

She roughly ran a hand through the blonde tresses he’d just been smoothing his fingers over while her head rested in his lap.  “Leo… he’s going to tell Jim.”

“A few hours ago, you didn’t give a flying _fuck_ what Jim Kirk thought.”

“And in another some-odd hours, he’ll come knocking with his tail between his legs. As he should, mind you, but still… we both know I’ll eventually forgive him.” She ground her teeth together. “He’s going to be pissed, especially because Spock knew first.”

McCoy rested his hand on her knee. “Darlin’, he’s going to be mad for a multitude of reasons, but we knew that when we made the decision to keep this a secret months ago.” He gently squeezed the limb. “I’m not complainin’ about it; I’m just saying we had anticipated this.”

“Still- “

He bent down to kiss her forehead. “I know.” Leonard’s thumb traced the curve of her jaw. “But you should worry imminently. Spock gave me some of his green-blooded logic after I came clean about how our decision is similar to the one he and Uhura made, so he was in no position to judge or share the news.” His eye twitched. “Smug bastard.”

She laughed in spite of herself. “Come on, sweetheart. It was pretty decent of him. Human, almost.”

“I know.” The man shuddered. “It makes me extremely uncomfortable.”

Danielle snorted as she knocked her shoulder into his bicep. “You are utterly ridiculous.”

“You’re the one who agreed to date me.”

“After you spent a year coercing me with food and sex!”

His lips curved into a smirk and he suddenly tugged her into his lap. “I _dare you_ to look me in the eye and tell me you didn’t enjoy every minute of it.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Bite your tongue.”

He hooked his index finger into the neckline of her oversized sleep shirt, pulling it to expose her collarbone. Then McCoy lowered his head to mouth at the skin. “I can think of something else I’d rather bite.”

She opened her mouth to chide him for his behavior, but a soft moan blocked the words taking residence on her tongue from springing free. “You can’t- “

Leonard grazed his teeth along the ridge of bone. “Can’t _what_?”

Danielle swallowed a thick gulp of air. “Try to distract me when you talk yourself into trouble.”

“But it’s so _very_ effective,” he drawled pointedly, hands sliding up her bare thighs until they pushed under the hem of her linen shorts. “Don’t you agree?”

“I hate you.”

His strong hands kneaded the skin. “You sure?”

“… no.”

* * *

When Danielle Blake and Leonard McCoy had sex, they rarely ever held back. She scratched, he marked, and sometimes, their pace was so hard and fast, anything that got in their way became collateral damage.

A few months after they’d started seeing each other, a dalliance with padded cuffs resulted in the separation of Leonard’s headboard from his bed in his quarters. When the maintenance request was submitted, it caught the attention of the captain after a member of the crew assured Leonard during breakfast in the mess that it would be repaired before the end of his shift. Jim was instantaneously convinced that Bones had _finally_ gotten some, which would explain his slightly improved demeanor as of late. However, while Kirk was dead-on accurate, what McCoy got up to in his free time was _his_ business, especially considering whom it was with.

The lieutenant who fixed the bed later assured Jim that the screws that mounted the headboard to the bed had been stripped, meaning it could have given way with one good flop onto the bed after a long day.

Thankfully, Kirk let his theory drop after that and McCoy sent the man a bottle of brandy as a thank you.

When Danielle Blake and Leonard McCoy made love, little in the universe was more beautiful.

Sometimes, she was on top, legs loosely slung around his waist while she was seated on his lap. Their arms would be wrapped around each other to keep their warm, slick bodies pressed together as she writhed, his back braced against the headboard or curved forward slightly as he supported himself without the aid of furniture.

Other times, Leonard controlled the pace while draped over her lithe body, legs settled between her thighs as he slowly rocked inside of her. Leo’s favorite aspect of topping was when he could tangle his fingers in her flaxen tresses, using his leverage to either kiss her or press their foreheads together so that he could whisper to her between panted breaths.

Even when Leonard buried his face in the hollow dip of Danielle’s neck to taste her salty skin, only their gasps and throaty moans filling the room as they each chased their climaxes, the beauty of the cosmos seemed to pale in comparison.

Though, Jim Kirk didn’t quite see it that way as he stood two feet inside McCoy’s doorway, frozen to the spot while Leo’s muscles rippled across his shoulders and down his lower back, hips undulating with every rhythmic thrust. The Georgian mouthed at the column of Danielle’s throat, skin exposed where her head lolled back on the arm of the couch.

Blake’s breath hitched once Leonard lowered his body just enough for his pelvic bone to grind down against her and she grasped at his hair with unsteady fingers.

Jim had only been watching in shock for a mere thirty seconds, but it was enough to make him sick.

“Bones?” Kirk finally piped up with a wounded edge to his voice, head tilted and brow wrinkled.

The CMO didn’t hear Jim, too lost to pleasure. However, his girlfriend’s eyes snapped open like she’d just awoken from a bad dream.

“L-Leo,” Danielle choked out with panicked eyes.

“Almost there, Darlin’,” he assured her in a low drawl, “I’ve got you.”

“No, _honey_ …” She pushed at his shoulder. “You have to stop.”

Leonard groaned, at the prospective torture but still nevertheless. “Did I hurt you?” He cupped her face in his hands, but she shook her head. “Did the condom break?”

Blake flushed as she grasped his chin and gently turned his head towards the door.

“ _Fuck_.”

Jim snorted bitterly. “So I see.”

McCoy blindly reached for the blanket draped over the back of the couch to cover their tangled bodies. “Jim, we can explain, just…” He winced. “Can you turn around and give us a minute to- “

“ _Fine_ ,” he snipped with a roll of his eyes.

With Jim’s back turned, Leo carefully pulled out and tossed the latex into the waste bin beneath the sink. Cheeks aflame, Danielle separated their clothes from the heap on the floor and slipped into her undergarments as hastily as she could. Her shirt and shorts returned to her slender frame in record time.

“Look, Jim…” Leonard addressed him once he was in his boxers and sweatpants.

Kirk spun back around with his arms folded over his chest. “Don’t insult my intelligence by telling me this isn’t what it looks like. I, of all people, know sex when I see it, Bones. Doesn’t even matter which races are involved.”

Leonard’s nostrils flared. He knew this information, too, as a doctor, but that didn’t mean his experience was first hand.

Unlike Jim.

“I’m not going to tell you that, neither of us are,” he insisted on the contrary. “She- “ His hazel eyes flickered over to the woman beside him, trying to come up with the words to adequately explain how this had started and snowballed into where they were now over a year later. “I-“ He exhaled a heavy breath. “We-“

“I love him, Jim,” Danielle blurted out, then shrunk back slightly as Kirk froze with crinkled eyes. “I love him,” she repeated softly.

He studied the pair of them for a brief moment before throwing his hands up in the air. “I can’t deal with this right now.” Jim shook his head. “We’re scheduled to arrive at the planet in two days and I have been informed there is a chance medical intervention will be required. Medbay needs to be ready for anything.” His blue eyes flickered to Blake. “Select a security team to accompany us down to the surface.”

“Jim-“

“Good evening, Dr. Blake.” He dipped his head, face stoic. “Dr. McCoy.”

And then Jim was gone.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Easy, Leo.” She gave his fingers a light squeeze. “Just keep breathing. They’re only air pockets because of the swirling gases in the atmosphere, none of which are highly flammable.”
> 
> “What a comfort,” he mumbled bitterly, ducking his head. He really didn’t want to vomit all over his girlfriend’s shoes.
> 
> No, he’d save that privilege for Jim Kirk.

Danielle had spent the better part of the last six hours analyzing the mission files that she had received on her PADD. The ongoing civil war on K’toa had reached a fever pitch over the pass two weeks as a result of a mystery illness that had swept across the southern hemisphere of the planet. The disease had affected only one side of the warring factions, leading the suffering population to believe that they had been the victims of biological warfare.

The mission objective was two-prong: discover whether a biological weapon had in fact been deployed in violation of the Federation of Planets Convention of Military Engagement and provide medical assistance to the afflicted members of the population.

Her whole day had been consumed by these reports, as had Leonard’s, but while his focus was on the mysterious affliction, hers was on putting together two security teams. The first would be assigned to Jim, not just for his safety, but because it was commonplace to have a team on any diplomatic mission. Kirk would likely be meeting with the most senior members of the Southern Hemisphere’s government and there was a significant chance that attempts on their lives were constantly being plotted.

The second team would be tasked with providing the medical team with security. This was a less risky endeavor. While the K’toans were not as medically advanced, the reason for such was not their cultural or religious opposition to technology. Rather, it was a lack of resources. They had made great strides since joining the Federation, but they were still nowhere near as technologically sophisticated as Starfleet Medical. As a result of their acceptance of medical technology, the Enterprise’s medical team was not all that likely to encounter much resistance to diagnosis, testing, and treatment of the afflicted or their families. Though, being in a warzone was inherently dangerous and protocol was still protocol.

She’d already decided that Lt. Hendorff would be on Team Alpha, which was the team assigned to Kirk. Lt. Gibson and Lt. Clark would also be on the team of six, leaving three spots open. She settled on Ensign A’n’teva for the fourth spot, as the Andorian male was likely to be a bit more sensitive to emotional shifts amongst those in a room and it might come in handy. After some more shuffling of files, she determined that Ensign Medevev would make a solid fifth for their team, leaving one more spot open.

A large part of Danielle wanted to head up Team Bravo. It was her instinct to make sure that Leo would be safe in execution of his duties and her confidence that he would say stay would be much greater if she could personally see to his safety. However, as much as she loved Leo, they had both agreed a long time ago that their relationship could not and _would not_ affect their jobs. That promise hadn’t been tested quite as much as it had in the past 48 hours.

So she would fulfill her promise to Leo and her responsibilities as Strategic Operations Officer and fill the last spot on Team Alpha. Lt. Johnston would lead Team Bravo instead with Danielle’s full faith and confidence. The platinum blonde was not just skilled in hand-to-hand combat and tactical analysis, but she was also a skilled negotiator. There would likely be some added benefit to having her on the team, assigned to the Chief Medical Officer specifically, in the event any of the patients were less than enthusiastic.

Plus, if neither she nor Jim was with McCoy, she’d trust her most over any other member of her security team.

She just hoped that Johnston’s wide range of skills wouldn’t be necessary.

* * *

The K’toan atmosphere was thick and rife with areas of slow-moving air that caused a multitude of bumps as Kirk piloted the shuttle through the jet stream. Such turbulence didn’t bother Danielle or any of the other members of the team, long-accustomed to less-than-smooth rides. However, Leonard McCoy was certain he would never be okay with anything less than smooth sailing.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” he growled through an exhale as his hands clutched at the steel restraint bars over his chest. “You’d think he was doing this on purpose.”

“He’s an asshole, sure, but he’s not a complete sadist.” Danielle’s green eyes darted around the shuttle, noting where the attention of their crewmates was focused while she and the doctor conversed. “I don’t think he’d stoop that low.”

“He better not.” His knuckles whitened. “Because if he _has_ ,” McCoy’s voice rose, “I’m going to break every bone in his hands. And I’m a _doctor_! I _know_ how to do that!”

Danielle hushed him in her best attempt to fight off curious and pitying gazes. “He’s fine. Doesn’t do well with turbulence. Childhood trauma. You know how it is,” she remarked nonchalantly and waved their attention off, hoping her assertion would convince them to mind their own business.

Stares lingered on them in the moments thereafter, but slowly, they started to wander away, returning to their previous focus. With their attention diverted, she reached for his hand and drew it down between their thighs.

“Easy, Leo.” She gave his fingers a light squeeze. “Just keep breathing. They’re only air pockets because of the swirling gases in the atmosphere, none of which are highly flammable.”

“What a comfort,” he mumbled bitterly, ducking his head. He really didn’t want to vomit all over his girlfriend’s shoes.

No, he’d save that privilege for Jim Kirk.

* * *

The K’toans were a humanoid species with angular faces and violet skin that reminded Jim of the shade Frank would turn every time the cops showed up at the front door of his childhood home. Granted, he didn’t think his stepfather could rock the glittering black velvet robes the members of the K’toan Parliament wore.

Each member’s designation was marked by the color of the metallic trim lining the hood, a practice somewhat similar to Starfleet’s own practice of braids on sleeves and pips on lapels. The Lord Chancellor, the most senior member of Parliament, had a thick rope trim and frogging of what first appeared to be translucent green. However, upon closer inspection, Jim realized that the trim was changing color, almost bioluminescent in appearance, whereas the rest of the government merely had solid (and boring) metallic shades.

It certainly made his dress uniform look comparatively mundane. Then again, gray tended to have that effect regardless of circumstance.

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Lord Kama’leah,” Jim greeted the man before him, extending a hand. “Though, I wish it were under better circumstances.”

“The Federation has long-exalted the heroics of the young Captain Kirk,” she remarked with a smile as she clasped his hand to shake it. “It is a privilege to have you and your colleagues join us, even though our time will be short.”

“Your hospitality is much appreciated.” He patted the top of her hand. “By my crew and myself.”

“It is the least that we could do, Captain,” Kama’leah asserted, waving off the notion. “I have the utmost faith that your doctors will be able to ascertain what precisely has ailed many of my people so gravely. I worry that this is only the first of many underhanded tactics our brothers and sisters across the border will use.”

Jim tilted his head thoughtfully. “Forgive me, but I could not help but notice you refer to them as your brothers and sisters, Lord Kama’leah?”

She nodded and steepled her fingers before her as she began to walk, Kirk falling into step beside her. “I know that it has been many centuries since the country from which you hail has endured such a trying time of war within its borders. While I pray that we can enjoy such peace in my lifetime, I have not forgotten whom we defend against. Family members, loved ones who simply do not share the same beliefs. It was only a few years ago that we were all united under one name, stood shoulder to shoulder to protect our children from invading forces and raised our flag high above the capitol in victory, Captain Kirk.” She let out a sigh that truly sounded like it was breathed under the press of the weight of the world. “I fear that in our squabbles, we have lost sight of that and it is our children who must suffer.”

* * *

“Alright, darlin’. I’m gonna ask you to follow a couple of instructions and if you do, I’ve got a sucker with your name on it, okay?” Leonard asked the little girl with bright scarlet hair, her skin a shade of lavender far too pale to be healthy for her species. When she nodded, he gave her hand a gentle pat. “Good girl. Now, open wide and stick out your tongue for me…”

The children who had been admitted to the hospital with symptoms that resembled those of their mystery illness far outweighed the number of symptomatic adults in the building by a margin of at _least_ ten to one. In addition to their numbers, their deterioration appeared to be far more severe.

The five-year-old girl he was currently examining had only been taken to the hospital two days ago and her condition was as severe as adults who had been in beds for at least three weeks. The rate of decline was startling.

She managed to weakly raise each of her limbs with immense effort and even followed his penlight dutifully. Though, McCoy could tell just how exhausted she was from the menial tasks.

“You did a great job, darlin’.” He mustered up his best smile and withdrew a lollipop from the large bag within his supply case. If his travels had taught him nothing else, sometimes bribery was the best policy. “I’ll be by to check on you soon.”

As McCoy ducked out of the hospital room, he was met by Dr. M’Benga, holding a tablet of his own with worry etched into his skin. The doctor was younger than his superior, but seemed to have suddenly aged a decade after a few hours on the mission.

“Anything?” he asked with immense exasperation, wincing when Leonard shook his head. He leaned in and grasped the man’s arm, trying to convey how quiet they needed to be. “These kids won’t last the week at this rate. Whatever this is, it’s going to decimate the entire population.” He swallowed thickly, horrified. “Do you think- do you think that’s the point?”

McCoy pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know, Geoff. I’d like to think that kind of evil doesn’t exist in the universe, but the things we’ve seen… I can’t discount the possibility.”

“I’ve been over their files, outside of their medical records,” he informed the older man. “They come from all over, different climates, different schools. There isn’t a thread that ties them together, other than the fact they’re all on the same side.”

“Mind if I take a look at them? Fresh pair of eyes and all that?”

“Have at it.” Geoff held his hands up, demonstrating a lack of ill-will. “I _hope_ I missed something. In fact, I’m praying that I did.”

* * *

After a brief tour of the palace, Jim had accompanied the Lord Chancellor to her garden with Danielle closely on his tail. She gave them just enough space to be respectful and not crowd them, but not enough to allow for vulnerability. And certainly not enough that the charm he was laying on oh so thick was lost on her.

At least he was using it to ensure he remained firmly in her good graces, so perhaps he could have a pass. Perhaps.

Kirk’s charisma aside, the garden was proving to be a sight worthy of a trip all on its own. There were fruits that appeared in shape and flesh to be similar to a tomato, but it was swirled with shades of yellows and greens and was at least the size of a cantaloupe back on Earth. The flowers were impressive in both size and color, shades of the rainbow she could never quite find back home.

She wondered if this garden would be considered prize-winning on K’toa or whether the flora and fauna simply grew this way everywhere.

Yet, the thought was quickly interrupted by the voice of her captain. “Dr. Blake, might I speak with you a moment?”

Her jaw clenched as she forced herself to remain professional. “Yes, sir.”

She silently followed Jim until they were a few feet away from the Lord Chancellor and definitely out of earshot. Then he spun on his boots.

“Is there a particular reason you feel the need to be on my heels, Dr. Blake?” he sniped at her under his breath. “Because I’m fairly certain that I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I’m just doing my job, _Captain_ ,” she retorted with disdain dripping from her voice. “My job is to provide security for you on an away mission, whether you like it or not.”

“I’d have thought you’d have chosen to play bodyguard for your boyfriend,” he countered snidely. “All things considered.”

“There was no _choice_ ,” she spat back, trying her hardest to keep her voice down. “I’m Strategic Operations Officer, the most senior member of the Enterprise’s security personnel. On away missions, protocol states that _I_ lead the captain’s protective detail…”

“Funny how you _conveniently_ forgot the protocol that required you to report your relationship with another crew member to the captain…”

“Oh, _come off it_ , Jim,” Danielle grit out, narrowing her green eyes. “You can’t break the rules when it’s convenient for you and then try to enforce others when it serves your purposes better.”

She contemplated adding that regulation only required she notify a commanding officer and technically, Pike was Jim’s commanding officer, so even more technically speaking, she and Leonard were in complete compliance. Yet, this was definitely not the time to drop that bombshell.

“No one’s coming to kill me, Dr. Blake. Give me _space_ ,” Jim commanded in a firm voice, his blue eyes downright steely,” and that’s an _order_.”

Danielle’s hands balled into clenched fists at her sides and she silently started to count to ten. It wouldn’t serve her well to deck Jim on a personal level and she was _damn sure_ Kama’leah would not be impressed by her behavior.

Her count was interrupted by the sound of something whizzing past her head. It was only a few moments later when she noticed one of the High Chancellor’s palace guards drop that she realized it was no insect, but rather, phaser fire.

“Get down!” she bellowed at Kama’leah, drawing her phaser to return the shot in the direction it had originated from. “You just had to open your big mouth,” she growled at Jim, who had drawn his own weapon by this point.

“I know, I know…” he lamented with a wince, sending off a burst at an oncoming assailant, swathed in dark green that must have allowed him to go undetected amongst the greenery.

“Is the Lord Chancellor protected?” she called out to Jim over the cacophony.

He glanced out of the corner of his eyes, noticing the coordinated movements of the red shirts and the palace guards as they swarmed the woman in the opalescent robe, as had been both Blake and Kirk’s instruction in the event of emergency. _She_ would be the main target of any attack.

“They’re in formation,” he acknowledged while picking off another attacker.

“Jim, we’ve got to get you both to safety…”

He shook his head at her. “Take the Lord Chancellor and _go_!”

She groaned. Five minutes ago, she’d been ready to kill him. Now, she was attempting to get him to safety. Funny the way that worked.

“Jim, I’m _not_ leaving you behind…” the blonde declared defiantly, silently noting with alarm that their attackers had suddenly increased in numbers.

“Head for the bunker!” one of the native guards called out. “We’ll lead the way.”

“The bunker.” Danielle grabbed his left arm as she shot with her right. “Come on… we’ll go together.”

Both she and Jim could see the movements of the rest of their team in their peripheral vision and with a shared look, silently agreed to backpedal towards in the direction they were headed.

After ten minutes of ducking behind brick benches, hiding behind massive trunks, and the odd boulder, they finally made behind the wooden doors that concealed the paneled entrance built into the stone floor. The Lord Commander had already been safely within the bunker’s confines for a few minutes by the time Hendorff climbed down as the last of Team Alpha’s non-command personnel.

“The next time you jinx us, I swear to God, I’m going to punch you in the fucking face,” she exhaled as she tucked her phaser into its holster, chest heaving from a combination of adrenaline and the speed at which they’d moved.

“I give you full permission to deck me if you so much as _think_ I’m going to jinx us again,” Kirk assured her with a relieved chuckle that only he could pull off.

The corner of her mouth quirked and though she was still angry with him, the return of their normal banter had soothed her rage for at least a little while. “I’m going to need that in writing.”

Jim holstered his phaser and pried open the hatch. Though with his back turned to the doors, he was unaware of the chamber doors sliding open behind him. “If we make it out of here, I’ll tattoo it on my-“

“Jim!” she cried out as the shrouded figure aimed his weapon at the blond. With only a few seconds to act, Danielle knew that she could not draw her phaser in time to take out their attacker, so she did the only thing that she could think of: she dove in front of the shot.

* * *

Leonard McCoy sat at his make shift desk, a precarious balancing act of crates and the K’toan equivalent of plywood, and massaged his temples. There was a dull throb setting in and it was doing nothing to help him decipher precisely what the hell was going on with this mystery illness.

Part of him wished that Danielle was here, if for no other reason than the reassurance she would provide and the confidence she was capable of instilling in him when he’d depleted his own stores. But she was off doing her job, protecting Jim and the Lord Chancellor, and he was quite a bit proud of that. Especially considering that he deserved a good black eye and a few broken bones for the way he’d treated her.

And there it was again, the searing pain racing its way behind his eyes, preventing him from forming any useful thoughts.

“Dammit!” he growled and smashed his fist down on the table, knocking over the glass of water in the far corner. The liquid streamed down over the edge and pooled on the floor, coating a few paper records on its way down. “Fucking hell!”

He hurried to blot up the water with the bottom of his blue tunic, trying to salvage whatever he could, not-so-silently kicking himself for being so foolish.

“Christ almighty…” he grumbled, waving some sheets in the air in hopes the water would bead off. “It’s enough to make a fucking riv-“ He froze in his movements and studied the drenched paper in his hands.

This child was from the P’lau province, as were two of the others he’d seen today. The other record in his hands was from the Maun’lei province, which was just across from…

“The river.” He stared down at the smeared ink in shock for a couple of seconds until it sunk in. “M’Benga!” he bellowed in no particular direction, knowing the doctor was around somewhere, even if he couldn’t see him. “Get in here… and bring a map!”

* * *

By the grace of some higher power, Jim had managed to carry Danielle’s limp body down into the bunker and seal the hatch behind them. Each step was more labored than the last and though Blake wasn't exceptionally heavy, his body had already taken a beating in trying to evade incoming fire. There was also the matter of the hole in her shoulder that he was trying to keep pressure on so that she wouldn’t bleed out.

“What happened?” Ensign Medevev inquired, panic rising in his voice as he helped Jim lower Danielle onto one of the couches in the main room.

“She took a shot for me,” he relayed, taking a towel one of the guards offered so that he could press it to her chest. “Get on the comm with Ensign Chekov. Tell him we need an emergency evac… _now_.”

* * *

McCoy had no idea what was taking M’Benga so damn long. After realizing that the common thread between the afflicted was the river that supplied their water, they’d requested samples to be tested against the blood work. As it turned out, the pathogens that were responsible for the illness had been released by severely damaged plants at the mouth of the river. This had not only infected the water, but the pathogens were on its way into the northern hemisphere and would soon contaminate their water supply. The clock was running on the southern children, but it would soon be running on the northern children, too, whose age made them particular susceptible to the pathogen due to their underdeveloped cardiovascular system by comparison.

He’d sent his colleague back over an hour ago for the supplies to synthesize the first vial of the serum, which the replicator could easily reproduce in mass quantities once they had perfected the formula. Only, Geoff seemed to have gotten waylaid.

Thirty minutes after that, Nurse Parker showed up with a crate in her arms.

There was a look hidden in the depths of her eyes that told Leonard that something was wrong, but right now, he couldn’t let his mind wander.

There were hundreds of children relying on him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim momentarily caught Christine’s eye and there was a flicker of something, recognition perhaps, that there was a deeper meaning to the conversation than M’Benga was aware of. It was fleeting, but it was there.
> 
> And for a moment, Jim wondered how any one of them could have ever thought that Christine Chapel wouldn’t have figured out that the relationship between Leonard McCoy and Danielle Blake ran deeper than the friendship they’d steadily built over the past few years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I've been away so long. My brain short-circuited after the completion of the bar exam and I've been struggling to find my creative spark since starting my new job. Looks like these idiots are here to stay for a while longer.
> 
> Thank you to all of you who have hung in there. Your love and support has been so immensely appreciated.

Golden tendrils of light coiled around Jim Kirk’s body, a beacon that should have provided him with some reassurance that everything would turn out okay because he was on the Enterprise, the first real home he could remember that actually _felt_ like one. Yet, it failed to release the grip of the vice that currently had his internal organs within its grasp, the dread that pooled viscously in the pit of his stomach.

Not when the warm glow was replaced by the shocking tones of crimson that had slowly seeped across the blue fabric clothing the limp woman in his arms.

For a moment, there was no sound. No steady inhales and exhales of Ensign Medevev, who had been tasked with applying pressure to the gaping hole in Dr. Blake’s shoulder. No gentle hum of the engine as they orbited K’toa. Not even the boisterous chatter of Lieutenant Scott that customarily accompanied his greetings upon their return from an away mission.

He didn’t even know whether Danielle was still breathing.

But before he could tumble too far down that particular rabbit hole, Dr. M’Benga had clamored into the room with a stretcher and a team of fellow doctors and nurses who were easing her out of his arms and onto the bed.

“ _Captain_ ,” a cool voice intoned and Jim’s head snapped up to discover it belonged to Spock. A moment later it became apparent that those around him had been trying to speak to him, but to little avail.

He cleared his throat. “Mr. Spock.”

“Captain,” Spock pressed on, brown eyes surveying the room. “If you would like to escort Lord Kama’leah-“

“That will not be necessary, Mr. Spock,” Kama’leah interjected with a wave of her violet hand. “Attend to your colleague. Her health is vastly more important at the moment than an escort and I am sure that any member of your crew could point me in the right direction of my temporary accommodations.”

Jim was increasingly more appreciative of her sageness and lack of formality with each passing moment.

“Mr. Scott will show you to your quarters and I will be with you as soon as I-“

“I’m afraid I’m rather tired, Captain,” she noted politely with sharp, but warm gray eyes as the click of the locks on the stretcher echoed through the room. “Perhaps, we may meet in the morning? I fear I may sleep for many hours.”

“Of course.” He dipped his head respectfully and if he wasn’t so concerned with the source of the blood on his hands, he might have smiled as she promptly linked her arm through Scotty’s and started to whisk him away. “Until morning.”

“Captain,” Spock interrupted his oddly calm moment to pull his attention back to the matter at hand. When Jim turned, it was just in time to see M’Benga and the team begin to wheel her out towards the Medbay, inclining his head for he and Spock to follow. “Perhaps, we should notify Dr. McCoy of the condition of Dr. Blake in this circumstance-“

“There’s no time,” M’Benga related matter-of-factly, eye occasionally flicking to where Chapel was monitoring her vitals on his left, the entire group practically jogging en route to their destination “By the time he gets here, she’ll have bled out already. We don’t have the luxury of time, Captain.”

Jim momentarily caught Christine’s eye and there was a flicker of something, recognition perhaps, that there was a deeper meaning to the conversation than M’Benga was aware of. It was fleeting, but it was _there_.

And for a moment, Jim wondered how any one of them could have ever thought that Christine Chapel wouldn’t have figured out that the relationship between Leonard McCoy and Danielle Blake ran deeper than the friendship they’d steadily built over the past few years.

“Do what you have to do, Dr. M’Benga,” Jim told him firmly, deferring to his medical judgment with a short nod.

The doors whooshed open and revealed a Medbay waiting for her arrival, each member of the staff poised to jump into action if needed. This went beyond duty. This was a matter of respect.

“Dawes, Hammond. Get her prepped and on the life support system ASAP and Donnelly, keep pressure on the wound. I’ll be scrubbed and ready in three.”

There was the clang of wheels jostling as she was charioted away by the nurses and M’Benga disappeared into the decontamination unit, leaving Kirk and Spock in an eerily empty intake area.

Jim sunk down onto a nearby chair and ran his fingers through his hair, disregarding the blood that now streaked his flaxen strands. Their whole argument had started so foolishly, triggered something inside him that she could never have been aware of. And it was patently unfair for her to shoulder the blame.

It did not erase the hurt that tore through him when he had walked in (or admittedly, perhaps barged in was more accurate) on Danielle and Leonard engaged in more intimate proclivities and learned that their love had blossomed under his nose, but had been kept secret. By his friends, his _best_ friend. The man who lied and conned just because he couldn’t leave him behind.

Maybe it was the misbegotten fear of being abandoned by McCoy in favor of his new love, though hardly anyone could blame Jim for the fear that was engrained in his bones by a lifetime of being cast aside. Or even the sum of the insecurities and childishness that had begun to rear its head on his birthday.

Either way, Danielle Blake could slip away from them all without any warning today and the last thing he’d said to her had been in anger.

His father would be _so very_ proud.

* * *

“Captain?” a timid voice called to him from a few feet away, forcing his focus from the operating theater to the petite woman beside him with piercing violet eyes and a brunette bob.

He had been standing at the observation window for over two hours after Spock had departed to arrange accommodations for the K'toans and man the bridge, looking on as M’Benga and co. worked tirelessly to repair the massive damage to her body. They’d been fortunate the shot hadn’t hit a joint or bone (and it had, in fact, missed by hundredths of an inch), but the phaser fire had eaten through skin and muscle and tissue that required an enormous amount of reconstruction. There was no guarantee that it could be done, even less of a guarantee that she wouldn’t lose use of the arm permanently.

And there was still the matter of how the hell he was going to break this to Bones when he came back. For once, he was grateful the man was a workaholic.

Jim looked over at her with tired eyes, arms folded over the blood-stained fabric across his chest he’d refused to change out of, lest her condition deteriorate while he was gone. “Yes, Nurse Parker?”

“Sir, the first round of antidote has finished synthesizing.” She gestured to a large crate on a push cart beside her. “I’ll have to bring this down to Dr. McCoy.”

Jim knew that she didn’t need his approval to beam planetside, but understood the question thinly concealed by her words: _What do you want me to tell him?_

“Understood.” His gaze slid back to the mass of people surrounding their Chief Operations Officer. Parker would have to forgive him for the lack of attention, though he didn’t anticipate she would take offense. “I’ll inform Dr. McCoy of her condition personally upon his return.”

His unspoken reply was equally as clear: _Absolutely nothing_.

* * *

It didn’t take a genius to know that Dr. McCoy and Dr. Blake had a relationship that exceeded the comradery of colleagues with scientific curiosity and crewmates aboard the same starship. There might not have been as much antagonism as there was between Kirk and McCoy (no one could truly stand up to that level of banter), but everyone understood that they had become friends, good friends, in the wake of Nero and Narada.

In truth, McCoy had been the first and only one to see her unravel so spectacularly after she refused to move from the spot she’d planted herself in after Pike had been recovered from the Romulan ship and rushed into surgery. Falling apart was not an option for a woman who had left her home behind at sixteen to make something more of herself than her last name, who traded on her reputation and brain, rather than her legacy. Weakness was not an option.

And yet, from the moment Leonard McCoy had walked out in his scrubs to escort her to his office to speak to her in private, flecks of her godfather’s blood still visible at the hem, it had seemed like the _only_ option. She’d been eternally thankful he had been so quick with his desk chair.

She may not have been privy to such a moment, but Nurse Maria Parker knew that the thread between them ran deep enough to the point where keeping McCoy out of the loop regarding Danielle’s condition was concerning, not to mention arduous.

The brunette did her best to soldier on with the knowledge that a variety of unknown changes to Blake’s condition could be occurring at any moment and she was purposefully depriving the Chief Medical Officer from being there to make judgment calls for any of it.

Not to mention she was a _terrible_ liar. And poker player.

Her general uneasiness had not gone unnoticed by her superior, who often arched an eyebrow in her direction when her back was turned. Leonard’s suspicions persisted for the rest of her rotation, even after all of the hyposprays had been administered and even the most dire of patients began to demonstrate signs of improved condition.

McCoy knew he should have felt more pleased with the result than he did, having seen children starting to rebound from being at the brink of death. So why did this victory seem so damn _hollow_?

And when Nurse Suvi arrived to finally boot him back to the Enterprise ( _God_ , that woman had clearly been spending too much time with Chapel), why did Parker look at him as though he were being lead in chains to his own execution?

* * *

Mr. Scott was not at his expected post when Leonard was beamed aboard and in part, he was grateful to not have known that from the get-go. His blood pressure would have been even higher than it already was and he didn’t want to find out the consequences of having a heart attack mid-transport.

He wasn’t surprised to find the corridors fairly empty, but _was_ taken aback to find Medbay looking more like a ghost town.

“Curiouser and curiouser,” he grumbled to no one in particular as he deviated course to check on the next batch of antidote at the sight of a light on in his office.

The first sign that something was wrong would have been that Jim was sitting in one of the pair of chairs on the other side of McCoy’s desk, rather than the chair on wheels he was usually so fond of taking for a spin, often in the literal sense. Of course, it would have been the first sign if not for the thick splotches of red littering his uniform tunic and vermillion flecks on his skin and in his hair.

“ _Jesus_ , Jim!” Leonard growled, taking quick strides forward so that he could give the kid a once-over. “Is that yours?”

“No,” his friend was quick to respond and morosely at that.

There was no “ _you should see the other guy”_ like the doctor was expecting or a “ _you’ll never believe what happened, Bones”_ that would have tamped down the thick lump that was quickly closing off his throat.

Only silence.

Silence was much worse.

“ _Jim_ …” He could barely breathe. It was starting to add up in his head: the lack of Scotty in the transport room, the empty Medbay. And _Jesus_ , all those pitying glances Parker probably hadn’t even realized she was casting his way.

And now the blood. _So, so_ much blood.

“Bones.” Jim had spent the last five hours trying to come up with something to say, but all of it had flown out the window at the sight of his best friend as the circumstances had started become clearer to him. “I-“

“Where is she?” he demanded suddenly, his voice low, but a little quieter than Jim was used to. He was gripping the edge of his desk so hard, his knuckles were stark white.

“There wasn’t time to get you, Bones,” Jim quickly explained, exhaustion showing as he stood from his chair with effort. “M’Benga’s got her, she’s in surgery.”

Leonard was already out the door before Jim could provide any further update on her condition or inform him of the circumstances surrounding her injuries. But when it became clear that he was intent on bursting into the operating theater, Jim used what little energy he had left to recover the distance between them and plant himself in front of the older man.

“ _Bones_ ,” he addressed him firmly, planting his hands on his shoulder.

“Get the fuck out of my way, Jim,” he snarled, batting his arms away.

But Jim wouldn’t be shaken off, grasping him tighter on the second try. “And what are you planning on doing, exactly?” he posited, trying to appeal to reason. “You going to demand that M’Benga step aside mid-surgery so you can scrub in? Without any idea as to what you’re jumping into or her condition or the extent of her injuries?”

Leonard breathed out sharply through his nose in a matter that reminded Jim faintly of a cornered bull.

“Bones, you know you can’t do that,” he persisted to rationalize. “She’d give you such shit if you did, not to mention she’d have been infuriated with me if I’d sent for you when you were administering the antidote and monitoring those kids, putting her above all of them. You know that, too.”

That seemed to trigger something within the doctor, his eyes sidetracking to peer over Jim’s shoulder and through the window. He couldn’t see much from the angle, but there was the tell-tale shock of bright blonde hair peeking out from around the torso of one of the other doctors in the OR.

For a moment, when Leonard sidestepped Jim, the captain was convinced he was going to burst in the room anyway. But then he approached the glass like it was a rabid dog, hesitant and tentative, and pressed a hand to the glass. Somehow, being a doctor and knowing what they were doing made it that much worse.

“Tell me how it happened,” he whispered, still observing. “Please, Jim. I need to know.”

Jim joined him, wordlessly at first. Many moments passed before he worked up the ability to speak again, the sight of his normally blustering and curmudgeonly, yet steady-handed best friend so visibly shaken unnerving. “We were attacked in the High Chancellor’s garden. We laid down cover fire so that she could escape to her bunker and- the shot was meant for me, Bones.”

And wasn’t that just Danielle Blake in a nutshell. Despite the vicious things that Jim had said to here mere nights ago, she was quick to protect him not only out of sense of duty, but of loyalty to, and love for, her friend.

Leonard merely nodded and the silence persisted again, lingering on even as Jim came to stand at his side and join him in his vigil.

It was another three hours before the exhausted M’Benga joined them in the observation area. He was only slightly surprised to see McCoy, but had clearly opted to dispose of his scrubs before making his appearance so as not to disturb him in the event he’d made it back to Medbay already. It was a little courtesy that Leonard appreciated immensely.

“She’s critical, but stable,” he told them at once, not wanting to prolong their misery any further. “There’s still a lot that’s up in the air, but she’s a fighter. As if we’d expect anything less out of her.”

 The last statement was meant to cut through the somber mood somewhat, but it certainly did nothing for Leonard.

“How bad was the damage?” he asked cautiously.

“We were fortunate in that it didn’t hit an artery itself, but there was immense soft tissue damage,” Geoff related to both CMO and Captain, mindful that while the former would understand the technical aspects, the latter would not. “I was able to perform a debridement pretty quickly to repair a substantial portion of the tissue, but the nerve damage unfortunately was worse once we actually got in there. I couldn’t keep her open on the table much longer than we had her without risking her going into cardiac arrest from the stress on her body. She’s being moved into an oxygen-rich regen chamber to help facilitate the healing process enough for us to repair more of her nerves and to see the extent of the effect on the subclavian artery in light of the fractured humerus.”

He paused and McCoy was moments away from needing to find a trash can in which he could empty the contents of his stomach. “Can we see the scans?”

M’Benga nodded. “I’ll have them sent to your PADD.”

“Thanks.” Leo turned to look back through the window over his shoulder and noted that they’d also begun a blood transfusion. Even from where he was standing, he could see that she was pale, her normal vibrancy dimmed further by the bright lights of the OR. “You gonna keep her out for a while?”

“At least for the next few days and then we can reevaluate.” When the CMO didn’t turn around, the slightly younger doctor addressed him in a gentle voice, “Leonard… she’d be in a _lot_ of pain…”

He sighed, feeling as though every limb now weighed three times as much. “I know.”

It was selfish to wish otherwise. No matter how comfortable any drugs might be able to keep her, Danielle still had a plasma-based projectile plow through skin and nerves and God only knew what else.

Jim, who had largely been silent until that point, spoke next, “Can we see her?”

Geoff dipped his head. “Once we have her settled, you can. But you won’t be able to touch her. She’ll be in the tube and we need to keep her in a sterile, controlled environment right now.” His gaze flicked towards where a nurse was approaching the glass panel that separated the main observation area from the OR and then back again. “I really should get back in there…”

“Yeah, you go.” Leonard inclined his head in both a symbol of understanding and gratitude. He took a step closer to M’Benga with an outstretched hand that his colleague shook. “Thanks, Geoff.”

“Just doing my job.” He waved it off with the other hand. “It’s exactly what you would have done.”

“I think that’s why he’s thanking you.” Jim’s mouth curled marginally, though the reaction didn’t reach his eyes.

Modest as ever, M’Benga could only nod before departing to return to his patient, leaving Kirk and McCoy to watch passively once more.

* * *

There had been no less than five cinematic incarnations of Sleeping Beauty since Leonard McCoy was a child and at least four more dating back to his parents’ adolescence. Some were dark dramas filed with neutral-density filters to increase the saturation and depths of colors. Others were filled with music, a woman with bright blonde hair with the voice of songbird.

But this was not a Disney film, nor did it have a soundtrack. The woman before him would not awaken as a result of true love’s kiss, despite the similarity of hair color and complexion. And how, at the moment, he wished he could try, though she was ensconced in thick glass and simply well out of his reach.

His palm rested on the glass as if she could maybe sense he was nearby and it would put her a little more at ease as she slept, make her body heal that much faster.

Leonard had looked at the chart and quite frankly, it was a testament to Jim’s quick thinking and M’Benga’s skill that she was even still breathing. Geoff hadn’t been mistaken when he said she’d sustained heavy nerve damage. In fact, McCoy knew that he was in for another marathon surgery based on the carnage the phaser fire had left behind and it wasn’t entirely clear yet whether she would regain use of the arm, let alone full use without any lingering neurological effects.

If the worst came to pass, he couldn’t be sure that she would even be the same person anymore, robbed of much of the independence she’d long-prided herself on until she could learn to adapt. But Leonard could only hope that Danielle would let him in and allow him to support her.

“Would it be really inappropriate for me to ask now?” Jim piped up seemingly out of nowhere, though Leo suspected it was out of a combination of being physically pained by the silence and having thought it over while looking in on her surgery.

“About?”

“You and Blake.” He shrugged. “I’m not asking for intimate details. We both know I already got more of a look into that than I ever wanted.  But I just- I don’t understand how this all happened right under my nose and I had no clue.”

“Jim Kirk, clueless? Imagine _that_.” He quirked an eyebrow, eyes darting briefly.

“ _Booooooones_!” Jim groaned, exasperated. “Come on, man.”

“Alright, alright,” he grumbled with a roll of his eyes, but made no effort to move. “I don’t really know what changed. I guess we were both a little drunk and plenty lonely. I don’t even know who kissed who first.” Which was a _total_ lie because he knew it was her, however there were some things not even Jim had a right to know. “But it was… it was the first time I’d felt that kind of spark since I was with Jocelyn.”

“I’m not surprised. I mean, she _is_ pretty feisty.” Jim’s crooked smile spread across his face and lit up his eyes. Then it wavered. “Wait a minute. So on Christmas morning, when I set up the mistletoe?” He cocked his head. “You were _together?!?_ ”

Leonard’s smirk spoke volumes.

“You threw me to the wolves!”

“In my defense…” the Georgian held up a hand. “You _did_ deserve to get punched.”

“She has a mean right hook,” he retorted petulantly.

“I wouldn’t know. We’re not into that sort of thing.”

Jim’s entire face seemed to screw up tightly. “Aww, that’s so gross, Bones.”

“You hear that, darlin’?” Leo turned back to his slumbering girlfriend, fingers curled as if to stroke the glass before he caught himself. “We finally did in the unflappable Jim Kirk.”

There was a fondness in his voice that Jim had not heard from Leonard before. It was a different tone than he heard during his sporadic calls and video conferences with Joanna. This was the endearment of a companion, a partner.

Jim approached him silently, stopping once they were shoulder to shoulder. “You love her,” he observed.

The most miniscule of smiles flashed on his lips. “I thought I’d lost the capacity, at least where a partner was concerned. But she just- she knows what I’ve done and where I’ve been and she doesn’t _care_.” His head dropped a little. “She’s someone I would have been proud to bring home to my parents. I wish they coulda met her.”

“You can still bring her to meet Gran,” Kirk pointed out. “Though, I fear what would ever happen if you got Gran, Chapel, and Blake together in one room.”

Leonard shuddered. “Good _God_ , man.”

“I think even the Klingon Empire would cower in fear. As they well should.”

McCoy’s chest heaved, soul heavy. It was hard to believe that someone so vibrant and alive was teetering on the precipice before him and he could do nothing but sit and watch. The parallel between her plight and his father’s was not lost on him, though he pointedly tried to ignore it so as not to spiral even further.

“It’ll be okay, Bones.” Jim clapped him on the shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “She’ll be ruling the roost that is the weapons bay again before you know it.”

Leonard McCoy was not a man of faith, nor was he spiritual in the slightest. But it was hard to believe the universe could be so cruel as to rob him of another person he loved. And even if it _didn’t_ , there was no guarantee the woman who came out of this chamber would be the same one that held his hand on the shuttle to K’toa to keep his panic at bay.

Leo had barely survived his divorce. There was no way he could endure losing Danielle, too.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Leonard.” Her grip on him tightened a fraction. “What aren’t you telling me?”
> 
> The skin between his eyebrows creased and he inhaled slowly. “The damage to your nerves… was immense. He did his best, took five surgeries to get to where you are…” He looked up at her, gaze full of pain and it broke her heart that she was the reason. “And we still don’t know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your continued support of this story! As many of you know, since starting this story, I have graduated law school, passed the bar exam, and become a practicing attorney. This fic gets written on my laptop on my 90 minute commute and in moments my brain is nice and quiet at night, so the fact that you're all still interested and following even though I'm slow to update at times means the world.
> 
> As does every single comment that I TREASURE! (*wink wink, nudge nudge* Please leave me more?)
> 
> And also that new ST Trailer? Holy MOLY. That single-handedly jolted me back into action on this chapter when I'd lost steam. I never thought I'd love a Rihanna chapter so much.
> 
>  
> 
> This chapter is in memory of the beautiful soul that was Anton Yelchin, a ray of sunshine whose passing has made the world just a little darker. We should all strive to have such unending passion.

 After eleven days and four surgeries, Dr. M’Benga decided that it was time to bring Danielle out of her medically-induced coma. Following the last operation, she had not required time in the chamber, as the hand-held regenerator was sufficient to close up the wound and repair any subdermal damage incurred during the procedure.

It was a strange experience for Leonard to step into the role of concerned loved one again when it had been nearly six years since his father had died and eight since he was first diagnosed with the terminal illness that ultimately took his life. Frightening, as well.

He was immeasurably grateful that Jim had graciously volunteered to be the one to contact Pike and Samantha to deliver the news, even more so that he was such a quick and curious study, able to process the medical jargon and ask questions for the ultimate clarity so that he could ferry along updates as accurately as possible. Samantha had passed on the news to their grandparents in Louisiana and Chris had relayed the message to the Blake girls’ grandparents in Pacifica, a suburb of Oakland.

Leonard had taken the liberty of sending a message to Admiral Blake to inform him of the incident and her condition, emphasizing that she had incurred such severe injuries in the execution of her duties as Strategic Operations Officer and acted bravely. Danielle might be furious with him, but there was a right way to do things where he was from and even if her father was an utter _shit_ , he might need his permission someday for-

 _Well_. Wasn’t _that_ an equally frightening train of thought?

Between he and Geoff, they’d ultimately estimated that she would likely rouse within six hours of being taken off the meds to allow her system to purge the remaining traces.

And he would be there. When she woke up, through rehab, for any additional surgeries she might require. He’d hold her hand and wipe her tears and love her, just as he’d done before the attack. Things might be different for her when she woke up and he wasn’t sure what they would do if it turned out she could no longer do her job in the future. But he’d be there, no matter what. Even if it meant transferring to a ground post.

The cat was undoubtedly out of the bag now, though Leonard couldn’t give less of a flying _fuck_ if he tried. There had been too many shifts off as ordered by Jim and the ones he was actually working were largely spent passing by her bed in the critical care unit every fifteen minutes like clockwork. Then there were the nights he spent at her bedside with his hand on the glass, whispering things to her that were indiscernible to everyone else. But the look on his face, the devastation in his eyes as he went through the motions, gave the meaning of them away.

Chapel had known, in spite of everything they’d done to conceal it. Spock next, though they didn’t know the order at the time. Then Nyota, then Jim. M’Benga eventually came next when they’d had a conversation in his office, mainly because he couldn’t lie to his friend and most trusted medical colleague (who wasn’t Chapel) in the face of everything.

This was a McCoy that no one had ever seen before and the thought was both scary and heartbreaking at the same time.

Yes, everything would be different when Danielle Blake woke up. And he had no idea what that would actually mean.

* * *

The world came back to Danielle Blake one sense at a time. Her aural surroundings were first: the gentle sighs of her ventilator, the intermittent beep of the heart monitor. She could tell almost at once that she was lying in a bed, but the sheets though tolerable, were not soft enough to be her own.

It was then that she realized there was a slight pressure on her right hand, ensconced in something warm. A few more seconds gave way to the realization that there was another hand holding hers, yet there was not much time to enjoy it as the gateway to sensation along her body cracked and a fresh wave of pain blew it wide open.

A whimper tore from her throat, unfamiliar to even her own ears. But there was no one else who could have made it, nowhere else it could have come from. The noise that sounded like a scared little girl again, eight years old and hiding under her bed because she had lost track of time while playing with her neighbor and come home later than she’d promised, her stomach growling from missing dinner, deprivation of which served as her punishment..

Twenty-seven and still every bit the scared child in a strange place she couldn’t identify with a single sensory memory.

“Darlin’,” a concerned voice drawled at her side. “I’m here. Tell me what hurts.”

Despite the agony, the voice thick like syrup was a balm to her weathered soul, even if it could do nothing for the pain.

“Leo?” She reached blindly for him with the other hand, but as soon as she moved an inch, a lightning bold of pain charged from shoulder to sternum and she had to claw at her sheets to prevent herself from screaming.

“Don’t, Darlin’.” The words were cautioning, but his tone was gentle. Danielle could sense that he had leaned in closer in accompaniment of the hand that cupped her cheek. “You damaged your shoulder, but I’ll explain more about that later. Just breathe for me.”

The beeping quickened somewhere above her as she struggled to keep her heart rate down, fought to maintain even breathing.

“Can you match my breathing, sweetheart?” Leonard asked calmly and brought her right hand to rest against his chest so that she could feel it rise and fall beneath her palm. “Nice and slow. You can do it, I know you can.”

“I _can’t_ ,” she retorted through clenched teeth as tears leaked from the corners of her eyes. “I c-can’t breathe.”

“Yes you can, Danielle. C’mon, you’ll never be able to fleece Jim at our next poker night if you don’t. And wouldn’t that be a shame?”

She somehow managed a laugh at that, but it was fleeting as it jolted her shoulder again and she gasped.

“I’m going to give you something for the pain, sweetheart.” There was the sound of something rattling beside her, metal on metal, and then the creak of a drawer opening. “On a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst, how much pain are you in?”

“Hit by a starship at warp.”

“So… ten then.” She heard a pop and a click before cool metal was pressed against the side of her neck. Danielle bit her lip in anticipation of the prick of the hypospray that broke through her skin and hissed as the medication was deployed into her blood stream. It was at the moment she realized he had prepared it one-handed.

If she wasn’t certain her whole body was on fire, the blonde would have found that very attractive.

Her breath still came in harsh bolts through her nose, but it had started to slow to match that of her boyfriend’s and the beep of her heart monitor with it.

“That’s my girl,” he praised and dipped to kiss her forehead. “I dimmed the lights for whenever you’re ready to show me those pretty green eyes of yours. But you take your time on that, Darlin’. I’m just happy to hear the sound of your voice.”

Danielle didn’t have an answer for that, but she would try. Even if it was just for him. Whatever had happened, whatever she’d done to get herself here, she could hear the toll it’d taken on Leonard in his voice.

It took another few minutes, but watery eyes opened and then squinted into slits. Though the room was dim, her irises were still unused to the intrusion of any light. Ten minutes later, they had adjusted enough to take in the sight of Leonard McCoy hovering over her.

Seeing him made her want to cry. He had dark circles under his eyes and a layer of scruff that made it clear he hadn’t cared to shave in some time. Maybe two weeks if the time he’d grown out his facial hair during leave just to prove a point was any indicator.

She hadn’t minded then, but seeing the cause of it this time? She did now.

“I’m sorry,” she professed at once, biting her lip while a surge of shame crashed over her. “I- I didn’t mean to scare you.”

And then Leonard looked like _he_ was ready to cry. “Don’t be sorry, darlin’. You were so brave. Do you remember what happened?”

She wrinkled her nose in though, brows furrowed as she tried to recall. But her brain produced nothing.

She shook her head.

“That’s alright, it’s to be expected with this kind of trauma,” he asserted reassuringly and smoothed back her hair. “You were leading Jim’s security team during his meeting with the High Chancellor when you were ambushed in her garden. Her palace guards helped her to safety in the bunker under yours and Jim’s direction. One of the attackers must have slipped through, but you noticed and jumped in front of Jim to save him.”

There was a vague recollection of a searing pain and then darkness, but not much else.

“How is everyone?” she asked instead of voicing that memory. He was better off thinking she couldn’t recollect.

He snorted. “Everyone’s fine, even corn-for-brains.”

“It would explain the color of his hair… always thought it looked like corn silk.”

Leonard smiled at that. “That it would. Would explain a lot of things about that idiot.”

Her eyes opened fully and McCoy could see the clear shade of green that was her irises for the first time in what felt like forever. Even if they looked… guilty, maybe? “Have you spoken? About… everything.”

“Not directly, but… that’s kind of how our friendship works, really. He’s-“ His thoughts broke off and he shook his head. “We’re good.”

“Good. You idiots need each other.”

“Yeah, well… don’t forget I need you, too, next time you think about hauling off and doing something stupid like that.” Leonard hooked a toe around the rolling stool and dragged it closer so he could sit at her bedside. “Especially when I’m not around to fix you when they bring you in.” Her eyebrows lifted. “M’Benga, thank God,” he answered her silent question. “Not sure anyone else on the ship could have done it, honestly.”

“Only because you weren’t on it.”

“Don’t know if I could have done it with you on my table.”

Danielle gnawed on the inside of her cheek, remorse coursing through every vein in her body. She’d done this to Leonard, been the reason he looked so worn down. He probably hadn’t eaten a decent meal and had subsisted on nothing more than coffee on some days.

He brought her knuckles to his lips and shook his head. “Don’t do that to yourself.” At her incredulous look, he chuckled. “I know you, remember? Better than anyone else on the ship and I’m not even referring to in the Biblical sense.” His mouth twitched. “Though, that is a privilege I rather enjoy.”

Her face reddened and Leonard found it was a nice reprieve from the unhealthily pale coloring she’d developed since her injury. Even if she looked scandalized.

 _“Leonard!”_ she hissed, eyes darting. “There are _people around_.”

The doctor lifted a hand to smooth down her hair and stretched just enough to brush his lips over hers. They were dry and a little chapped, but it didn’t matter. He’d been tortured by the possibility that he might never kiss her again and see the kind of smile she was sporting now.

“Cat’s out of the bag, darlin’. I already blew our cover.” He gave her an apologetic smile. “It’s probably made its way around the ship by now. Didn’t help when I tried to storm into the OR and Jim had to hold me back. Only got worse from there. Oh, and Chapel figured it out a year ago.”

She would have laughed if not for the havoc it would have wrecked on her pain receptors. Instead, Danielle settled for a snort. “Of course she did.”

“We deserve whatever she’s going to throw at us for underestimating her.”

“Mm. It’s okay, though. It’ll be nice not to have to sneak around now.” Her focus lowered to their linked fingers, nearly white skin a stark contrast against his tanned flesh. You could take the boy out of Georgia, even into deep space, but you couldn’t take the Georgia out of the boy. “How bad is it?” she asked suddenly, softly.

McCoy sighed. “The phaser fire tore through muscle and nerves, nicked bone. Geoff was able to repair a lot of the muscle and tissue damage and the osteo-regen looks to have completely repaired the bone, which is incredible considering the proximity Jim estimated.”

She nodded, digesting what he’d told her. It sounded awful and a viable reason for the pain, but then she caught the odd way his hazel eyes flicked down to their hands.

“Leonard.” Her grip on him tightened a fraction. “What aren’t you telling me?”

The skin between his eyebrows creased and he inhaled slowly. “The damage to your nerves… was immense. He did his best, took five surgeries to get to where you are…” He looked up at her, gaze full of pain and it broke her heart that she was the reason. “And we still don’t know.”

The implication of what they didn’t know hit her like a ton of bricks in that moment. They couldn’t tell her what kind of a recovery she would make, what level of functionality would return to that arm and shoulder, let alone that side of her body. If she couldn’t do her job, she couldn’t stay on the ship. They might not even be willing to give her so much as a _desk_ job if the range of motion was miniscule.

It was one thing for her godfather, a well-respected Admiral, to be unable to walk without the use of a cane for the time-being. Based on his progress, he might no longer require its use within the year.

But to be unable to shoot, to conduct her experiments or notate her research? How long would it be before she received her honorable discharge and had to watch the Enterprise take off without her?

“When will we know?” she rasped and promptly pressed her lips together to stop the wobbling.

“Once you start physical therapy, we’ll have a better idea as to how you’ve healed and what kind of progress you’re making from day to day, week to week,” he explained. “That will tell us a lot about how your body responded to the surgery and what we can reasonably expect.”

That meant time away from the ship, a declaration that she was unfit for duty that could become permanent.

_And so it begins…_

The feeling of dread quickly took hold and spread from bone to bone, limb to limb, threatening to consume her.

“Come home with me.”

She blinked at Leonard. “ _What_?”

“Come home with me,” he repeated. “Come back to Georgia. I’ve been promising I’d take you there and why should we waste more time?” he further posited. “You can take advantage of the warm weather. San Francisco is too cold in January anyway and the sun will be better for your health. I’ll even help you pack.

“We can’t climb the peach trees, but you can meet Gran. I can take you to the creek and show you around town.” He kissed the inside of her wrist. “I’m your attending, we can keep up with PT while we’re down there. I’m admitted at Emory anyway and that’s twenty minutes away from Gran’s, tops.”

It was unavoidable that Leonard would meet the man she considered the most important one in her life, as he’d been the one to recruit him to join Starfleet in the first place. There was no symbolic step to take there. Meeting Sam was debatable, but he’d already encountered her a few times when she’d been slacking off at her apartment a few blocks from HQ and the Academy, or scrounging for non-cafeteria food. Which was more often than she’d ever admit.

But this? This was monumental. Leonard’s grandmother was the gateway into his life outside of Starfleet, both the warm memories and the painful ones that represented more loss than such a wonderful man had deserved. Death and divorce, equally unwelcome guests.

Her silence seemed to tip the doctor off that his girlfriend was processing the implications of his offer and he backed off it a little. “You don’t have to let me know today. We’re still a few days’ travel from Earth and you’ll need to spend at least 48 hours in the hospital, just to follow protocol…”

“Okay.”

His head snapped to his left. “Okay?”

“Yeah,” she agreed with a tiny smile, head lolling a little to the side. It was the first time since she’d awoken that there was anything worth feeling happy about. “If you’re willing to put up with me during and after therapy. I can’t guarantee I’ll always be pleasant.”

“Darlin’,” he chuckled, “you have seen me the morning after a screaming match with Jocelyn, hungover, _and_ without my first cup of coffee for the day. It don’t get much worse than that.” He scratched the scruff lining his jaw. “So Georgia it is, then.”

“I’ll even let you keep the scruff, if you play your cards right.”

Leo’s brow arched at the suggestion. “If I play my cards right?”

“Well…” Her teeth drew along her bottom lip. “Sleep deprivation aside, it’s kinda hot.”

“Is it now?” He pushed up from the chair and leaned in to rub his cheek a few times against her face before swooping in for a kiss. “You’re sure?”

She giggled, but made no effort to wiggle away and that had nothing to do with the state of her shoulder or any of the drugs in her system.

“Gran’s gonna hate it,” he murmured against her lips, disregarding the fact that Nurse Parker had just come within fifteen feet of the bio bed before shuffling off with averted eyes. “Call me caveman or lumberjack or somethin’.”

She disentangled her left hand from his grasp so that she could stroke her fingertips over his cheek. “Your collection of plaid doesn’t _really_ help your cause.”

Laughter rumbled through his chest for what felt like the first time in ages. It had only been a little over ten days at a minimum, but he had been acutely aware of every passing second.

Despite his body’s inclination to surge into another kiss with a bit more pressure, the rational part of his brain did not want to overwhelm her when he’d just gotten her back. And he tried not to think of the days he wasn’t sure he would.

Instead, Leonard settled for a gentle peck that was followed by lingering, reverent touches of her face and neck.

And if Jim showed up to interrupt them, which later turned into a habit of making kissy noises at McCoy every time he walked by in Medbay?

Well, it was plenty worth it.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Danielle went rigid. “What?”
> 
> “Don’t make it weird. It’s not some Oedipal thing,” he groused just a little.

From the moment Danielle Blake had been transferred to the Starfleet Teaching Hospital in San Francisco, her mood had infinitely improved. She loved the Enterprise and her fellow crew, but there was something uplifting about recovering in a room with sunlight streaming in through the windows and a dynamic world just outside them, even if it was fairly bitter weather for February.

Having a hospital room meant more than a modicum of privacy, as well. Despite the fact that her relationship with McCoy was common knowledge ship-wide, she didn’t particularly like feeling as though everyone was looking at them or at her. And she could be in as much pain as she wanted in peace.

After the first few days she’d been awake, M’Benga had worked tirelessly to determine the best pain medication for the job, as well as the schedule. She still ached and burned more than she cared to admit, but it seemed like the worst came only when she was waking up. Otherwise, Leonard kept her well-medicated, but not stoned, since she had officially been transferred into his care when they’d arrived planetside.

He took to the role of her attending like a fish to water, though his bedside manner was leaps and bounds above that which Jim experienced. Then again, Captain or not, he was a _bit_ of a baby when it came to medical exams.

Leonard was just helping her get comfortable enough to eat some of the soup a nurse had brought when a knock on the open door caught their attention and they looked over to find Jim Kirk in the doorway.

“Hey…” he greeted them a bit soberly, rocking on his heels. “Can I come in?”

Danielle tilted her head to the side so that she could see him better around McCoy’s body and nodded. “Hi, Jim.” Her eyes and her face as a whole brightened at the sight of the flowers that he was carrying. “Come on in, just finishing up lunch. I’d offer you some, but… it’s basically baby food.”

Jim managed a small laugh at that and approached her slowly, almost cautiously. Though he and Bones had settled their differences, he hadn’t quite made his peace with her yet. “I’m sure Bones’s grandmother will make up for it. She used to send care packages to us at the Academy and _damn_ that woman can cook.”

Now that he was at her bedside, Danielle could identify the flowers in the captain’s hands. The clear glass vase was filled with white and yellow daisies interspersed with bright fuchsia roses and lemon Asiatic lilies.

“This is a nice little care package, too.” She smiled at him. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.”

“You’re welcome,” he answered quickly and his blue eyes darted around the room for an adequate resting place.

It came as no surprise to Kirk that her hospital room was full of gifts from well-wishers, cards and flowers and balloons. Even a stuffed teddy bear in one particular corner.

As if reading his mind, she gestured with her unrestricted hand to the small end table at her bedside. “Right here is perfect.”

“You sure? I can find a place on the window sill with the others…”

“No one else knew that daisies and lilies are my favorite.” Another small, but girlish smile. “Nice to have my favorite close by.”

Kirk didn’t miss how her eyes flicked to Leonard for just a moment or how his head dipped to hide the twitch of his mouth. Now that Jim knew of their relationship, all of their secret glances and hidden gestures had become more apparent.

“I’m glad that you liked them.” Without the vase to hold any longer, his fingers itched for something to occupy them in light of the awkwardness nagging at the back of his brain, so he slipped his hands into the pockets of his dress uniform pants to quell them for the time being.

McCoy, sensing the stagnancy of the conversation, decided to take pity on Kirk and excuse himself. “I’m gonna go see if there are any more of those little ice cream cups you like so much. Maybe it’ll be your lucky day and they’ll have the kind with chocolate _and_ vanilla.” If this was the olive branch he thought it was, it would be easier for the captain to speak to her if he made himself scare.

“M’kay,” she hummed and lifted her head to watch him as he stood in his crisp white uniform that she secretly revered.

“I’ll be back,” he tacked on for good measure and bent down to kiss her forehead. Jim hadn’t balked at their displays of affection in the Medbay, but Leonard still wasn’t entirely comfortable with more than small gestures in the company of others quite yet. “You still like vanilla, kid? I can sneak you some back, if you want. Plenty to go around.”

Jim’s shoulders noticeably slumped a fraction, perhaps from relief of some tension. “Thanks, Bones. That’d be great.”

“Don’t mention it,” he acknowledged with a double clap of Jim’s shoulder and exited the room.

The blond stood in silence for a few minutes, unsure of even where to start. So instead of trying to undo weeks’ worth of damage, he brought out the old Kirk charm. “You look great,” he told her at last with warm blue eyes. “Earth has been good for you.”

“I look like _shit_ ,” she laughed and under normal circumstances, that likely would have been accompanied by a toss of her hair. “But it was nice of you to pay me a complement.” She gestured to the nearby chair. “Sit.”

“I saw you asleep in a glass box,” Jim reminded her as he dragged the seat a little closer and then he sunk down. “You were even paler than Snow White. Trust me, you look a lot more like yourself now,” he reinforced with conviction. Because he truly believed it.

Even in a sling and no makeup, color had returned to her cheeks and her eyes were brighter than the last time he’d seen her in Medbay.

“Charmer,” she accused, though there was no hostility in her words. Amusement, if anything. “Hope I didn’t leave you with a lot of paperwork.”

He shook his head. “Nothing too bad. M’Benga gave me the full medical write up, so that was half the battle. The rest was a matter of recapping the attack. Medevev wrote a supplementary brief to corroborate events, not that anyone was in doubt as to what happened, but protocol, you know.” He waved his hand. “Anyway, point being that it was no more paperwork than I deserved after you saved my life considering how I’ve treated you lately.”

“Jim… really…” She winced. “I should have-“

“You remind me of my mom.”

Danielle went rigid. “What?”

“Don’t make it weird. It’s not some Oedipal thing,” he groused just a little. “You’ve always reminded me of her, actually.” He rubbed at the back of his neck, a mannerism that reminded her distinctly of a small child in trouble. “There are a lot of similarities.”

Her brows furrowed. “Really?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “There are a lot of physical resemblances to how I remember her when I was a kid, the blonde hair and the green eyes. She was a science officer, so I saw pictures of her in science blues, with her hair pulled back like yours.”

“Woman had taste,” she said with a hint of amusement.

He leaned forward in the chair so that his elbows were on his thighs. “In some things, not in others.” There was a flash of pain in his eyes so palpable that Danielle’s swaddled hand twitched with the want to touch him for reassurance’s sake. But it was the hand nearest to him and perfectly useless at the moment. Jim must have noticed. “Sorry. Old habits die hard.” There was a beat before he continued. “As you saw on my birthday.”

“You’re allowed to be morose on your birthday, Jim. I know it’s not generally a day you consider a happy one…”

“But you tried to make it pleasant,” he countered in a breath, “and I thanked you by not only being the fucking asshole of all assholes, I betrayed your trust to get in a cheap shot.”

Danielle fell silent, thinking about how enraged she had been at that moment. The shame that had flooded her body as she was forced to admit something she’d held secret for so long. “I hadn’t told Leo yet.” Her voice was weak and she cleared her throat. “He didn’t know.”

He rubbed a hand at the back of his neck again. Kirk had wondered how much McCoy knew after he had found out about their relationship, but he thought it might have come up. Or at least, the chance was high enough that he could feel a little less guilty while he remained ignorant to the answer.

But the tradeoff was that he now felt worse than he ever had before.

“It’s worse when I get drunk,” he spoke up, trying to somehow make her understand a little better why he had reacted as he did. He knew that he couldn’t take away how much he had hurt her, but maybe, if she completely understood, it could at least retroactively soften the blow. “I’m generally a fairly mushy drunk, you know that, but I was angry the moment I rolled out of bed that morning. When you said that thing about finding a girl that night, I was so many drinks in that all I could see and hear was Mom, disappointed in me yet again. You even narrowed your eyes and wrinkled your nose _just_ the way she did when she was getting hauled up to school because I’d gotten in another fight. So I _lost_ it and lashed out and picked the meanest, nastiest thing that I could say to you.”

Jim gripped the armrests to lever himself out of the seat. The space that she had previously made for McCoy was still open, so he took the perch at the edge of the bio bed and reached for the hand unaffected by her injuries.

The quiet lingered between them, though Kirk couldn’t, _wouldn’t_ bring himself to meet her gaze. “I’m so fucking sorry, Blake.”

She gave his hand a little squeeze. “I’m sorry too, Jim.” His head snapped up at her apology, azure irises cloudy with uncertainty. “You were undoubtedly an asshole that night, but we spent so many months hiding our relationship from you. You’re like a brother to Leo, and you’re a part of our weird patchwork family. We shouldn’t have kept it from you for so long.”

He shook his head. “It was your right to keep everything private. I know- I know that Jocelyn fucked Bones up. You weren’t just being careful for you, you were being careful for _him_. Because you love him. I know that isn’t just lip service. You _do_.”

Danielle’s face softened and she bobbed her head in agreement. “Yes, I do. And I’m going to hang on as long as he’ll have me.”

“He’ll have you forever, if you let him.” At her confused head tilt, he laughed. “He’s not a love ‘em and leave ‘em kind of guy like me, Danielle. If he could fall in love again after his ex-wife took him for everything he had, including his daughter, then the woman he fell for must be pretty damn special.” He exhaled slowly through his nose. “When you were in the coma, the way he was… I’ve never seen him like that before. He spent every second at your bedside, reading to you, talking to you, even when you were behind glass and he couldn’t touch you. At least until Chapel dragged him by the ear to sleep on the couch in the nurse’s lounge.

“But when M’Benga said you didn’t need to be in the chamber anymore, I don’t think he ever let go of your hand. He never went back to the couch again.”

Danielle bit her lip and shut her eyes, droplets already forming at the corners and threatening to spill over her fair cheeks. She had known from the moment she first laid eyes on Leonard after she’d awoken that her injury had taken a drastic toll on him, but she hadn’t known the extent. Based on the depth of her own love for him, she shouldn’t have been surprised by it. Yet, she was.

“I never thought I’d find someone even a tenth as incredible of a person as he is. I thought I’d always be married to my job and that was okay. I’d come to terms with that.”

Jim smiled, broad and shining. “But now you can see yourself married to _him_ instead.”

Her eyelids snapped open at that, eyes glassy. “Jim…” Her voice dropped a little. “That’s not even remotely on the table. Now or possibly ever.” She shook her head, which drew her blonde tresses every which way. “I don’t know that he believes in marriage anymore and I can’t blame him for that, not after what he went through.”

The blond nodded slowly, considering. “… is that a dealbreaker for you?”

“It’s not,” she assured him and judging by the quick response and firm tone, he did not even bother to question her sincerity. “I told you before that I would be with him for as long as he’d have me. Marriage was never a caveat there. We can have a life together without it.”

“This may be a newsflash for you, Danielle, but you already have a life together.”

And there was the Kirk smile she loved. It wasn’t the charming, flirty one, but rather, the sweet one, full of such affection and warmth that not even his own skin could contain it and the corners of his eyes crinkled under the strain.

“I guess we do.” Her smile was plenty watery, but she cleared her throat to compose herself and her sass returned. “You know, we’ve got this captain in it who is a complete and utter pain in the ass, but he’s actually nice to have around.”

“I have it on good authority that he’s pretty damn happy to _be_ around.”

“That’s good... because they have no intention of letting him out of their lives.” She reached for his hand again and clasped it with slightly stronger fingers. “He may be an idiot, but he’s their best friend. Even if he tried to kiss her on Christmas.”

Jim groaned. “I didn’t _know_!”

“To be honest?” Her green eyes flinted. “It was worth getting to deck you _just once_.”

“Oh.” Jim’s face screwed up and he turned his head away from her in complaint. “Fuck you, Blake. You two deserve each other. Have a good time in Georgia being total assholes together.”

“You givin’ my girl a hard time, Jim?” a deep voice drawled from the corned of the room and they both looked to find Leonard had returned with a short stack of ice cream cups in his hand. “You better not be or this is the last time I’m ever gettin’ you ice cream.”

Jim could not ignore the way Blake had practically glowed when Leonard walked into the room.

“Other way around, Leo.” She relinquished Jim’s fingers to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. “We were just discussing how much I enjoyed punching him in the face at Christmas.”

McCoy let out a bark of laughter. “Well, that’s as worthy of a topic of conversation as I’ve ever heard.” He pushed one cup and spoon into Jim’s hands and let his focus roam over the monitors. When he was satisfied that there hadn’t been any change since he left, he kissed her forehead again. “Jackpot. I found the last cup of the chocolate and vanilla swirl.”

“My hero.” She grinned up at him. Jim swore it was the same look he’d seen in countless holos of his mother and father together. “M’just glad you came back. Anyone gets one good look at you in this fine uniform of yours and you’ll have ‘em falling all over you, McCoy.”

Leonard merely shrugged. “Hope they don’t crack their heads open on the tile.”

Her laughter was downright uproarious.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the lovely reviews, my darling readers. They were so motivating in getting the next chapter out quicker than last time! I always look forward to your comments.
> 
> In the next chapter: McCake goes to Georgia!


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “First of all, you’re not Jocelyn. Thank God.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Star Trek Beyond was everything I'd hoped it'd be and more. Truly befitting of the 50th Anniversary. (And so much BONES!)
> 
> Thank you to those of you who have reviewed and left comments, also left kudos. Means a LOT!

Twelve days later, Danielle Blake finally found herself in Georgia. Leonard had done most of the packing, though Samantha had come over to help when it came to her wardrobe. It turned out to be a blessing, considering that references to a handkerchief hem and an A-line silhouette were met with a wrinkled brow.

But he _had_ made all of their travel arrangements, which included plotting out the best seat locations on board the bicoastal shuttle to accommodate her injured arm (window, not aisle – too great of a chance someone might jostle her) while arranging for expedited private security screening due to a medical necessity and priority check-in. For a man who absolutely hated to fly, he’d planned everything down to the last detail.

She was slightly embarrassed by the sheer amount of luggage that accompanied them, but they would be staying for at least three weeks and possibly more, if all went well and his grandmother didn’t disapprove of her.

Leonard constantly assured her that Gran would love her, but it was hard not to worry. With his parents having passed away years prior, she and Joanna were the only immediate family that he had left. If they did not like her, she couldn’t imagine that their relationship would survive.

And that wasn’t even taking into consideration the long shadow that Jocelyn Darnell cast over their relationship. Danielle couldn’t fault his grandmother for being overprotective.

A cab had driven them the forty-five minute journey from Atlanta International to Marietta where Grace McCoy still lived in the house that had been passed down in her husband, TJ’s, family for generations. Of course, it had been modernized and retrofitted accordingly over time. Though, the charm and history still remained and lingered in every nook and cranny, from the house to the barn and the stables.

“What if she hates me?” Danielle wondered allowed as she stared out the open taxi door at the colonial house with the wrap-around porch that seemed to loom over her.

Leonard crouched down in the space between her legs and the curb. “Hey,” he addressed her softly. “Gran is _not_ going to hate you. She’s only heard good things about you and I told you she said she’s looking forward to meeting you.”

“She only heard good things about Jocelyn, too,” she countered with a duck of her head. “And she disliked her the first time you brought her home.”

“First of all, you’re _not_ Jocelyn. Thank God.” He set a hand on her knee in a comforting gesture. “And secondly, I’m not the same man, Danielle. I’m not a seventeen-year-old puppy dog still high off of her having chosen me over the quarterback of the football team. I’m a grown man now. I need a partner and I’ve been through the wringer enough times to know what that means.” He pushed himself up from the pavement, the rocks crunching beneath his sneakers. “Come inside, Darlin’.” He extended a hand. “It’s going to be okay.”

Danielle sucked in a deep breath. She supposed she couldn’t blame his grandmother for her distaste for Jocelyn upon meeting her, when she thought about it. It only leant credence to the idea that she was an excellent judge of character and had her grandson’s best interests at heart.

The scientist wasn’t a thing like his ex-wife and hopefully, that would serve her well. Maybe her utter adoration for Leonard wouldn’t hurt either.

Finally, she nodded and grasped his hand to let him assist her in exiting the cab. Despite the fact that she had been in a sling for nearly two weeks now, her equilibrium was still somewhat off at times and there had been too many close calls for McCoy to take a chance at letting her insist on independence.

She’d learned fairly quickly that picking those battles was a lost cause.

The driver had been nice enough to help them to the doors with all of their belongings, which included a medkit and some basic physical therapy equipment that would aid in the early days of PT. Leonard had told her they’d work on stretching the arm to prevent the build up of scar tissue and increase range of motion, as well as stimulate the nerves and muscles to prevent atrophy. Of course, the driver had received a substantial tip for his assistance and general caution when he’d seen Danielle in a sling. Leonard had noticed he had deftly avoided quite a few potholes so as not to wrench her arm in any way.

The door opened long before anyone could so much as touch the doorbell or knock. On the other side stood an older woman a solid five inches shorter than Danielle, with nearly white hair pulled back in a ballerina bun. Her thin eyebrows were elegantly arched, but her eyes shined as they landed on the man standing on her porch.

“Oh, my sweet boy,” she sighed with what sounded like relief and hurried forward onto the wooden boards to wrap him up in her arms. He dwarfed her in size and stature, but she somehow did not seem nearly as small in comparison as most women would be.

“Gran…” There was strain in his voice as he embraced her tightly and he buried his face in her shoulder.

He and Gran had always stayed in close contact, but he’d fled Georgia the moment the ink on his divorce and (lack of) custody agreement was dry, taking the first bus out of the state. Iowa had been pure luck of the draw and he hadn’t been home since.

That was almost six years ago now.

“I know, Leonard,” she murmured in his ear, voicing soothing as though he was a child again. “I know. I’m just glad you’re home. My grandson, the lieutenant commander.” The smile was evident in her voice. “I’m so proud of you, sweetheart.”

Danielle shifted on her feet, wishing she had something to do with her hands. She wouldn’t dare interrupt this reunion, but it didn’t mean that she didn’t feel awkward at being the silent voyeur.

His shoulders slumped with relief and he nodded. “Thanks, Gran.”

She straightened to clasp his cheeks in her hand, stubble rough against her palm. “You’re as handsome as ever, you know.” Her lips curved. “Now, are you going to introduce me to your sweetheart here?”

Leonard watched as her gray eyes flicked from his face to the blonde’s and back again. “Of course, Gran.” He took a pair of steps in retreat, just far enough so that he could slip his hand to the small of Danielle’s lower back to ease (urge) her forward. “Gran, this is Dr. Danielle Blake.” There was a beat and a pleased quirk of his lips before he added, “My girlfriend.”

“Mrs. McCoy, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” She smiled at her, head ducked just a little in an uncharacteristically shy manner. Danielle could hold her own with ambassadors and kings, but meeting her boyfriend’s grandmother fell into an entirely different category. “Leonard has told me so many wonderful stories that it’s nice to be able to put a face to them all.” Her shoulder muscles twitched with the instinct to shake her hand, but the tiniest movement resulted in a slight grimace that was accompanied by her apology. “I’m sorry… I’d shake your hand, but I forget sometimes I’ve been winged.”

“Don’t think anything of it, Dr. Blake.” Grace waved her off with a soft laugh. “This one broke his arm enough times as a boy, yet, his grandfather and I always managed to find him trying to rope swing into the creek with his friends after only one treatment with the osteoregenerator.” She sighed. “His mama _loved_ that.”

Leonard reached up to cup his ear, as if he could still feel the tug of Eleanora’s fingers as she hauled him into the house, drenched and dripping along the hardwood.

“Well.” Danielle looked over at him, delighted. “That’s definitely a story that I’ll have to file away for later. And please, call me Danielle, Mrs. McCoy,” she insisted.

“Danielle.” She tipped her head in assent. “Come on inside.” Grace waved them forward. “I’ve made sandwiches for lunch and you look like you could use a little meat on your bones.” She fixed a momentarily accusatory glare at her grandson. “Have you been making sure she’s well-fed? I _know_ you’re well-versed in the kitchen, I taught you myself.”

“It’s that damn hospital food,” he grumbled in counter. “Nobody wants to eat that sh- _garbage_.”

“You told me she was only in the hospital a few days,” Gran pointed out. “What’s your excuse for the rest of ‘em, hmm?” she pressed him with a raise of her brows, but did not give him time to answer before she was already three steps back into the house and waving them inside. “Come, eat! We’ll get some meat on those bones yet!”

* * *

Lunch was a fairly upbeat affair with club sandwiches that had been topped with honey mustard and set out on a plate of epic proportions, so massive that Danielle had expected guests to drop by at any moment. Though, as it turned out, they never came and Grace continued to eye her across the table as she mentally counted how many triangles the younger woman consumed.

She ate fairly quietly, both exhausted from the journey and content to let Leo catch up with his grandmother. She was not entirely sure where she fit into conversation quite yet, anyway.

After she finished off her second sandwich, the elder woman turned her attention on the blonde.

“So…” Grace clasped her mug of tea between her hands. “Do you ride?”

“Excuse me?”

“Horses.” She waved her hand. “We’ve got the barn and the stables out back. I thought if you liked horses, perhaps Leonard could show you around.”

“My godfather, Admiral Pike, grew up on a ranch in Mojave. He loved to ride horses,” she recalled fondly, almost wistful. “He had this one horse, Tango. That was his boy. Gave anyone else that tried to ride him hell, but was pretty tolerant of me, so long as I rode with Uncle Chris. Unfortunately, when his grandfather died and the house passed to him, he moved up north by where I grew up and Tango stayed behind with his father. I haven’t really ridden since.”

McCoy turned to her with parted lips, a bit dumbstruck. “I didn’t know that.”

“I still like to be able to surprise you occasionally.” She smiled, quickly followed by a yawn. “Mm. Sorry. Painkillers have been making me tired.”

“Leonard, why don’t you show her upstairs?” Gran suggested, neatly easing her way onto her feet and retrieving Danielle’s empty plate in one swoop before anyone could protest. “It’ll be a nice miniature tour before you can show her around the property.”

“C’mon, darlin’.” He shifted off of his chair (four sandwiches later) and eased his arm around her back to give her a more solid foundation with which to lever herself. She did so with a small grunt, but found her footing eventually. “Guess it’s time you got to see all of my embarrassing childhood photos on the wall.”

“If you think that I’m stopping with the wall, you are out of your mind, Leonard McCoy.”

“Great,” McCoy grumbled as he prepared to lead her up the first wooden step. “I’m sure she’ll show you ones of me butt naked, running around with a beach pail on my head or something…” His lips twisted into a scowl, but it made the pain a little easier to bear.

“It’s a bucket,” Gran chimed in offhandedly while slipping the plate into the dishwasher. “And you kept walking into walls and ruining the paint.”

“Promise me you won’t tell any of this to Jim,” he plead in a way that made her heart flutter. “Or hell, to Chapel. I have a reputation to maintain in Medbay.”

“I _swear_ -“ Her voice was a little strained as she leaned on the banister for balance to assist with her first step up. “It behooves me to continue letting you rule medical with an iron fist.” She smiled weakly, but another step sufficiently jolted her arm and she only partially stifled a whimper. “Please tell me there’s only one flight of stairs.”

His heart dropped. Danielle was not one to allow herself to show pain, especially in front of him when he would fuss, so she had to be in utter agony. “This is it. Only five more steps.” He gripped her hip a little tighter. “I’d offer to carry you, but I think I’d be faced with a right hook that would surpass the one you bestowed on Jim last Christmas.”

They took the remaining four stairs slowly, with Leonard a step behind her in the event that she stumbled. However, his hand did not leave the small of her back for an instant.

When she finally arrived at the top, her grip on the top of the railing was white-knuckled and she was panting heavily to cope with the pain. The nerves were still knitting together, but this meant that any pain would radiate through her body like shrapnel.

“You did great, darlin’.” He pressed a kiss to her temple, staying close. “Hard part’s over and now you get to see all of my secret shames.” He inclined his head towards the frames lining the hallway. “You ready for your impression of me to be permanently ruined?”

The corner of her mouth rose. “I’ve already heard you sing classical music in the shower. Your reputation with me has been permanently obliterated.”

He muttered something fairly indiscernible under his breath, but she did manage to hear one word of it. “Honey, Elvis most certainly did _not_ sing like that. Though…” Her teeth drew along her bottom lip and she lowered her voice so that his grandmother could not hear. “You’ve got the hip action down pat.”

Leonard hummed low in his throat, but closed his eyes against the warmth rapidly spreading through his limbs. Sex was off the table for a while yet, he _knew_ that. His brain just had to remind the rest of his body of that.

“You’re writing checks again.” His eyes snapped open and he arched his brow at her.

“Sorry…”

“No, you’re not.”

She beamed and started to take a few steps down the corridor. “Nope,” she snapped her ‘p.’ “Still got it.”

“You really ever thought you didn’t with me? Did you knock your head while I wasn’t lookin’ or somethin’?”

“Your accent gets thicker the longer we’re here,” she remarked suddenly, a little evasive. However, it was no less true. She’d heard the more pronounced lilt when he was drunk, when he was tired. But it was approaching those levels now while sober and alert.

He cleared his throat, letting his gaze wander away from her to study the walls. “Native habitat, I guess.”

“I like it.” She dipped her head and came to a stop in front of the first holographic frame she saw. “Which one is you?”

He skimmed his finger through the air to point to a boy in the back row of the sea of kindergarteners, with neatly combed black hair parted to the side and a dark blue dress shirt. His smile was even gap-toothed. “This one.”

“Oh.” She clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, _Leo_.”

“Shut up,” he groused, trailing to the next one.

Danielle saw every one of his class pictures, photos of him with his sister, Donna, fishing down at the creek. In another, he’d been buried up to his neck in the sand at some beach and Donna was torturing him by kissing his cheeks and head repeatedly and he was frowning the whole time.

Then Leo on a horse and another at no more than eight in his father’s lab coat with a tricorder in his hands.

There were more frames lining the walls, but they were located further down the corridor and well-past the room that Leonard led her into.

The room itself was painted gray that bordered so closely to white, she suspected it would only resemble the color with sun streaming in like it was doing at that moment. There was a full bed with a black, white, and cyan plaid comforter, walnut headboard, and matching dresser between the windows. There was also a hip-high chest directly opposite the foot of the bed that served both as extra storage and a resting place for the television set.

Danielle immediately headed in the direction of the bed, eager to sit down and stop moving altogether. Though when she did rest, she noticed a holo on the nightstand.

She could see a slightly younger Leonard in the middle in a cap and gown, a rich crimson color, with an old-fashioned stethoscope around his neck as a symbolic initiation. His arms were around two older men, one aged around three decades more than the other. Even at his happiest, he had never looked so young.

“That’s my dad and my grandfather,” he spoke up suddenly, voice a little thicker with something that wasn’t just his accent. “Med school graduation, so that was about a decade ago.”

Leonard had never shown her a picture of his father before and she’d never asked. Danielle figured that information about David came in dribs and drabs, but it was at his own pace. She would not push him.

“You look so much like your father.” Her voice was soft, gentle to make room for the pain that was sure to coil around him. Then a thought dawned on her. “This was your bedroom, wasn’t it?” she asked, turning her head to gaze up at him. “When you came to visit, this was your room?”

He silently nodded and joined her on the bed. “We were really close with my grandparents because they lived ten minutes away from our house, so Donna and I used to sleepover here all the time. We’d even get up at dawn to go riding or go with Pa down to the river to fish. I was a really lucky kid.”

“You were,” she agreed, “and they were lucky to have you, too. Lots of grandparents don’t get to see their grandchildren all that much, being so far away. The advantage worked both ways, I’d say.”

“Yeah…” He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck, eyes still fixed on the holo. “Things got rough not too long after that photo. Grandpa’s health took a turn and we lost him just after Christmas, Dad only a few years later. Mama less than eighteen months after. That picture- “ Leonard sucked in a breath. “It’s one of the last few happy memories I have of all of us together.”

“And twenty-three years of happiness to hold onto from before that,” she reminded him. “There’s a lot of good there, Leo.”

“It’s hard to remember sometimes. The next couple of years were marked by the disintegration of my marriage, even if we got married just before Pa got sick. I don’t think that I really let myself grieve after losing him, threw myself into my marriage and my work and that habit never really went away. By the time Dad-“ His voice broke off and he shook his head. “We thought that having a baby would fix things. It was a God awful decision, looking back on it, but it was a balm for a little while. Mama got to meet her granddaughter, hold her. I got to have the memories I couldn’t have with my dad. Once she was gone, it was like whatever glue was left holding me together was gone, too.

“I know I blame Jocelyn for a lot of the problems in our marriage, but I had also had a hand in it. I was distant and miserable, buried myself in long shifts just so I wouldn’t have to face what I’d lost. I blame her for sleeping with Clay while we were married, but I can’t say I don’t understand why she wanted out.”

Danielle wanted to toss her stupid sling out the window so that she could wrap Leonard up in her arms, hold him close so that he’d know how loved he was. But the human body was cruel, and time even crueler, and so the only thing she was capable of doing was to take his right hand with her left one and hold on tight.

“When I left Georgia, I knew I was leaving Jo behind and that hurt because a judge had told me I was an unfit father and unworthy of so much as seeing her. But I didn’t think through leaving Gran. She was just like me, trying to move on and survive in a world without the people she loved. I forgot that she had lost her husband and son and daughter-in-law where I’d lost my father and grandfather and mother. It wasn’t fair to her that she had to lose me, too. And because of me, Joanna. I left her with nobody.”

“But you came home.” She glanced up at him from beneath her lashes. “You’ve rebuilt your life, kept in touch even when it was probably impossible to look her in the eye. You can’t change what you did then, but you’re here now. That counts for a lot.”

“She should hate me for what I’ve done and what I’ve taken away from her.”

_Her son, her granddaughter…_

“You ever think maybe it’s time you talked to her about it?” she suggested with a squeeze of his fingers. “Hearing what she has to say might be helpful to the both of you.”

Leonard angled his body so that his kneecap rested against the edge of her thigh and extended his hand. His deft fingers brushed back some flaxen tresses to holster them behind her ear, the heel of his hand running along her jaw as it retreated. “Thank you for coming home with me.”

“How could I pass up the chance to see you in your natural habitat?” She swiveled her head so that her lips could catch his palm. “Besides, where you go, I go. _Always_.”

* * *

 

 


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonard could only mumble profanities to himself the entire way back to his bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and the kudos! Enjoy a little more Bones in his natural habitat! :p

When Leonard returned to the kitchen an hour later, Danielle was resting comfortably upstairs and Gran was pottering around the kitchen. He’d have been remiss to not acknowledge that the sight was one he had dearly missed, drawing on long-buried memories of Saturday mornings and after-school visits.

She may have been older, but she was no less capable and McCoy was grateful for small blessings.

“If you’re going to stand there, Leonard McCoy,” she addressed him with her head half-buried in a low cabinet without even bothering to look up, “you might as well make yourself useful and wash some dishes.”

“Yes, m’am,” he agreed without protest, but with an air of respect he used when addressing foreign dignitaries and the Admiralty.

Without another word, he crossed the room to handle the dishes in the sink. They weren’t piled as high as he’d seen during the major holidays, but the basin was littered with pots, pans, and servingware alike.

Leonard found that he enjoyed being able to do something so mundane with his hands in a way he could not aboard the Enterprise. Replicators and recycling virtually eliminated the need for actual dishes, though he occasionally assisted Danielle when she managed to rig up a makeshift stove or some other form of cooking apparatus with Bunsen burners and sheet metal for pancakes.

Still, it was not the same as standing in the middle of a kitchen with a view of a whole world outside the window.

“I can hear you thinking from all the way over here, sweetheart,” his grandmother noted wryly.

“Sorry,” he mumbled a bit sheepishly.

“Out with it,” she insisted, hefting a container of flour into her arms. “No use keeping your thoughts to yourself now after thirty-three years of doing the complete opposite.”

Leo grumbled something under his breath.

“Don’t pout, Leo,” Gran said. She was consulting a recipe card and had a pair of old-fashioned reading glasses perched at the end of her nose. “It was unbecoming when you were four, and it hasn’t aged well at all, trust me.”

“ _Gran_.”

“Don’t you ‘ _Gran_ ’ me.” She waved him off, but her eyes twinkled with amusement. “I see that you’ve been _quite_ busy during your time as a Starfleet officer. The way that girl looks at you is not the way a girl looks at someone new.”

“She was my friend first,” he remarked in explanation, slightly exasperated.

“Yes,” Gran agreed smoothly. “I believe the old-fashioned term for that would be ‘friends with benefits’.”

The fork between his fingers clattered against the metal of the drain. “Gran!”

She merely shrugged her narrow shoulders. “As if I didn’t know what you got up to in the barn your senior year of high school. Please.”

McCoy groaned, but dutifully continued to scrub. “You don’t have to worry about that now. We…” He paused, trying to find the delicate phrasing. “.. can’t at the moment.”

“I’m well aware of how the mechanics work, but I appreciate the reassurance, darling. Are you done with that pot yet? I need it to make the blueberry filling.”

Her nonchalance frightened him. “I love her, you know.” And so did his own honesty.

Grace slipped her glasses from her nose and set them down atop a dry spot on the counter. “I know that, Leo. I took one look at you when you came to my door and I knew. Eyesight hasn’t gone that much, quite yet.”

“I just… I don’t want you to think I have a type. Or that I’m falling into old habits.”

She shook her head, impeccably secured bun staying in place. “I saw your relationship with Miss Blake as more of a partnership in the twenty-five minutes we spent eating lunch than in your entire decade with Jocelyn.”

Leonard’s eyes lit up in such a way that the green became infinitely more prominent. She had not seen them in such a fashion since he was in his early-twenties. “Dr. Blake. She might be too polite to correct people, but I’m not.”

She scoffed something fierce. “Tell me something I _don’t_ know, Leo.”

His lips spread into a slow grin as he set the last fork into the drying rack. He’d nearly forgotten his grandmother was a _hell_ of a woman.

“Alright.” She shooed him with two quick flicks of her hands. “Get out of my way now and go upstairs. You look ready to drop and considering all the dishes are clean, I’ll feel guilty if I keep you down here any longer.”

“… you sure?” he postured. “Because I could-“

“ _Out_ ,” she commanded, snapping a dishcloth at his backside. “Go get some sleep and keep your lady company. Your bedroom’s missed you.” The fact that she’d missed him was clear, although unspoken. “Dinner will be ready at 5:30. Should you not make an appearance, I _will_ start without you.”

“You really gonna eat the whole pie, Gran?” He arched an eyebrow.

And earned another whack with the cloth for his troubles. “You did not have the pleasure of seeing how much food I was capable of consuming while I was pregnant with your father. You McCoy babies can _eat_.” There was a slight pause and he noticed a look in her eye that frightened him. “Wouldn’t mind cooking for three of you the next time you visit. Four if Lady Misery cooperates for a change.” She turned away from him, leaving Leonard dumbstruck. “Just a thought.”

Leonard could only mumble profanities to himself the entire way back to his bedroom.

* * *

“Do you miss it?”

“Hmm?” Leonard adjusted his position in the corner of the porch swing so that he could let his eyes lower to her face. They had been sitting outside for the better part of the last half-hour in a post-dessert haze, the sound of chirping crickets and croaking bullfrogs filling the silence that lingered.

“I’ve always thought about Georgia in the abstract,” she attempted to elaborate, tilting back her head to return his gaze. “I knew that you were from here and I can hear your accent, but every memory I have of you is back in California or on the Enterprise. I’ve never gotten to see you at home, with your grandmother. You’re different when you’re here.” She smiled. “Lighter, almost, I think.”

“That’s… surprising.” He blew out a breath. “I miss Joanna and I miss Gran, too. But I think, maybe, even though the Enterprise feels like home now, there are so many memories and so much history here. It will never _not_ be home.” His fingertips trailed over her collarbone, not really for any reason in particular. “Maybe you’ll like it enough here to come back with me sometime?”

“I already like Georgia.” She sighed and looked up at the sky, where the stars were bright and shining as visible as ever without the light pollution from other houses and the big city. “It’s different from where I grew up. Slower paced, which is nice. Less condensed. And you know, it’s your home. It’s where Gran is. So how could I not like it?”

He blinked at her, taken aback by how easily the sentiment rolled off of her tongue. “I have half a mind to keep you here instead ‘a goin’ back up in that tin can.”

She laughed melodiously and tapped his thigh with her hand, left arm the one wedged between them while her sling was free on the right. “Scotty’ll never speak to you again if he hears that kind of talk.”

“I’ve dealt with enough of his burns that I think he can suck it up.”

“ _Sureeeeeeee_ …” She carefully drew her legs up onto the free side of the swing so she could fold them, her whole body now resting up against Leonard’s. “You know, sometimes I wonder whether space looks bigger from down here or whether it looks bigger when you’re up there.”

He pondered her posture for a moment. “I think that maybe it seems bigger down here, but never-ending up there. At some point, the sky disappears into the horizon, but up there, it’s everywhere.”

“Mm. I never thought about it like that.”

“I do have a good idea every now and then.”

“Not according to Spock,” she pointed out.

“No.” He actually cracked a smile at that and melted into her again. “I s’pose not.”

* * *

Danielle Blake was not a crier. Sure, she had occasional slips as much as the next person in times of immense sorry or great relief, but she had never been emotional to the point where she would cry at the drop of the hat. Nothing was wrong with that, of course, but it just wasn’t her.

However, the first day of physical therapy was really testing her ability to hold back her tears.

She was fortunate that the early protocols were such that her physical therapy focused on stretching and regaining the range of motion in her arm while preventing any further atrophy. Consequently, it meant that the routine could be accomplished in the comfort of Gran’s home.

However, comfort was relative.

She had thought the first exercise would be a cakewalk. In fact, it was quite possibly the simplest thing Leonard could have asked her to do. She was merely to place her left hand flat on the chest for balance while letting her injured arm hang loosely.

It seemed easy. Then a wave of pain tore through her arm and radiated through her whole body that Leonard actually had to wrap his arms around her to prevent her from crumpling. Whether it was from pain or frustration, neither could be sure.

“It’s alright,” he soothed into her ear as she trembled against him. “Everyone’s first day of physical therapy is shit.”

Her breath came in a gasp. “It hasn’t even _started_ yet,” she growled in frustration.

“We’ll work on it, that’s why it’s called therapy.” He kissed the top of her head. “So think of this as medium. We’ll just go mild for a little while, darlin’. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“But you said,” she reminded him, “that you wouldn’t know what to expect with my recovery until we started physical therapy.”

Well, that certainly made her reaction a bit clearer. “Hey.” His voice was a bit firmer. “I also said that I would know once I saw your progress from day to day, week to week. Last I checked, we’ve only been at it for a very generous estimate of five minutes.”

“I’m done, Leo.” She sagged against him, tears now staining his navy tee. “They’re never going to let me back on a ship.”

Leonard carefully guided her onto the bed where she could relax for a little, sitting with her legs dangling over the edge. He was quick to join her, sidling up to her on her left, to avoid aggravating her injured arm further.

“Here’s what we’re going to do,” he said decisively. “We’re going to sit here for fifteen minutes and you’re going to let it all out. Everything you’re scared of, every tear. And I’m going to hold you and listen and tell you it’s going to be alright. Because it _will be_.” The doctor curled his arm across his body so he could turn her face in his direction when she would not look at him. “And then, we’re going to get up and try it again. And again, if we need to. Because you’re going to be back on that ship, where you want to be, and I’m going to be right there with you. God help me, I will not get back on that tin can without you.”

Her eyes opened, a slightly clearer shade of green than they’d been that morning. They surveyed him, the hard set of his jaw and the determination in his gaze. “You keep saying that and Scotty might actually shoot you.”

“All the more reason I’m gonna make _damn_ sure you’re there with me. You’re a better shot, so you’ll have to defend my honor.”

She let out a laugh that felt like a balm to his beleaguered soul and undoubtedly lowered his blood pressure. “You just don’t want to be left alone with Jim,” she accused.

McCoy arched an indignant eyebrow. “I resent the implication.”

Danielle snorted. “We both know you’d follow that boy off a cliff if you had to. And bitch about it the whole way down.”

“For what it’s worth, I would also follow you off a cliff, _but_ I wouldn’t complain on the way down.”

“Oh, you old _softie_.”

“Only with you.” He kissed her cheek, lips spreading into a smile against her skin. “Now. You think we can give this another go, darlin’?”

Danielle looked up at him, uncertain at first. But she could see the faith that he had in her written all over his face, down to the gold flecks in his eyes that she often found herself getting lost in. And she knew at once what she planned to do.

“Okay,” she finally agreed. “Let’s kick it in the ass.”

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Doctor.” Both women turned their head to look at Leonard, where he had a PADD of his own in his hands and was skimming through something on the screen. “It’s Doctor Blake,” he elaborated without bothering to look up. “We serve on the Enterprise together. She’s works predominantly in biochem and chemical physics.” At the receptionist’s confused stare, he lifted an eyebrow. “She makes a lot of things go boom.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey. I have a [Tumblr ](http://heelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com) dedicated just to my writing now and you can check out sneak peeks, status updates, and deleted scenes over there. They're going to be plentiful.

Danielle had mixed feelings about her first outing since they’d arrived in Georgia, mainly because it coincided with her initial visit to the physical therapy clinic at Emory University. It was actually referred to as the Orthopedics and Sports Medicine Center at Executive Park, but the gist was still the same.

It was nice to feel sunlight on her face beyond the time she spent on the porch on the swing or in a rocking chair, which was usually partially shaded anyway, and the air rushing through the narrow gap in the window from where she’d cracked it open. Despite the advent of hovercars over two centuries ago, Leonard insisted on continuing to drive a slightly beat-up pick up truck that had been his grandfather’s at some point. Maybe it was an extension of old habits he’d picked up while his aviophobia was in full swing. Or perhaps, it was just an old-fashioned, southern thing.

Either way, she had to admit that it was a little endearing. 

He wound up parking the car in a spot reserved exclusively for patients that was approximately sixty feet from the entrance to the building. The building itself was made almost entirely of glass and while they could see a small portion of what appeared to be reception near the doors, the rest was blacked out and she assumed it was tinted for the privacy of patients.

Leonard kept a respectable distance from his girlfriend as they entered the building, only drawing closer when it seemed like she might need some additional support. Even then it was just a gentle hand on her uninjured arm to steady her and he stepped aside when she had cleared the stairs and was no longer susceptible to her weakened equilibrium.

A swirl of cool air hit her as the automatic doors parted and they entered the building, whereupon the Emory University logo was emblazoned in the lobby in the middle of the shiny mahogany panel behind reception. Leonard steered her towards a chair to wait while he spoke to the woman behind the desk.

From her spot, Danielle watched as his entire demeanor changed with his first step in the direction of the receptionist. His posture straightened and he walked with an air of purpose that was befitting of a doctor, one that she’d seen countless times as he strode through medbay or took charge in a medical crisis.

Her lips twitched at the familiar sight, the first moment of normalcy she’d experienced since her discharge from the hospital, even if it was fleeting at best.

Leonard only spoke with her for a couple of minutes and when he returned to retrieve his girlfriend, she noticed that he had an identification card clipped to his belt loop. It was a small rectangle of what appeared to be plexiglass, lit with various lines that formed a scannable code to unlock various doors throughout the facility, all beneath his name, title, and rank on the Enterprise beside his picture.

“Is that new?” she asked, eyes flicking to the card for just a second.

“I have my old one still,” he answered rather unhelpfully while coiling his fingers around her right bicep to help her to her feet, “but it’s from six or seven years ago. When I called before we left San Francisco, I was told I needed a new one. I’m admitted here, but considering I technically practice on the Enterprise, it needed to reflect that I’m a member of Starfleet.”

 _Dr. Leonard McCoy_  
Chief Medical Office  
U.S.S. Enterprise

“It suits you,” she hummed with a smile once she was standing again. “I’ll admit that I’m a little disappointed it doesn’t say Lieutenant Commander.”

He snorted. “You’re the only one who is.”

“I hear too many people call you Dr. McCoy for me not to find Lieutenant Commander McCoy exceptionally hot,” she remarked offhandedly and could practically _hear_ Leo’s eye roll next to her. “What? It usually ends particularly well when I-“

“Dr. McCoy.” The receptionist stood in greeting and already had a PADD extended towards them. Her smile was polite and friendly, but the doe eyes she was shooting him beneath her long lashes was not. “Is this your patient?”

“Sling gave it away, huh?” Danielle offered up calmly, though her toes were curling in her sneakers.

“Ms. Blake, then, I presume.” She pushed the PADD and stylus a little closer. “If you could please just sign-“

“Doctor.” Both women turned their head to look at Leonard, where he had a PADD of his own in his hands and was skimming through something on the screen. “It’s Doctor Blake,” he elaborated without bothering to look up. “We serve on the Enterprise together. She’s works predominantly in biochem and chemical physics.” At the receptionist’s confused stare, he lifted an eyebrow. “She makes a lot of things go _boom_.”

Danielle bit the inside of her cheek so hard that she very nearly drew blood.

“Oh, that’s nice. Must be interesting.” The blasé tone in her voice betrayed the fact she found it anything but and proceeded to continue focusing her efforts on Leonard. “Dr. McCoy, if you wouldn’t wind waiting a minute while I process her forms, I can give you a full tour of the facilities. I know it’s been a while since you were last here…”

He waved off the suggestion, still not bothering to look up. “Equipment still on the main floor? Therapy rooms on the second?”

“Well, _yes_ , but…”

“That’s all I’ll be needing then, thanks.”

His brusque tone should have been sufficient to assuage the little portion of Danielle’s brain that was offended by the woman openly hitting on her boyfriend, but it wasn’t. Instead, she just wished that he would look up from the stupid tablet and acknowledge her come-on with a gentle brush off. Even if she didn’t know _why_ it was bothering her so much when she also knew Leonard would never return her advances.

He tucked the PADD at his side and took a pair of steps that signaled to Danielle that they were going to get moving and she did her very best to stow her reservations and follow.

He was quiet as they navigated through the sea of well-spaced equipment, brightly colored medicine balls in one corner beside a rack of free weights. It looked a little like the fitness center on the Enterprise, but with more sunlight and less red, blue, and yellow shirts.

Leonard led her into the elevator and she found herself rocking a bit on her heels. “Slower than you’re used to?”

Sure. That was it. “Yeah. Guess so.”

The doors reopened and she trailed him to a room with a twin sized bed in the center. The walls were lined with diagrams of the human body and a small counter butted up against the far wall with some basic supplies.

“Alright, let’s get you settled in the middle.” He deposited the tablet on the smooth surface and positioned himself at her side to assist.

Danielle was able to sit without any assistance, but needed some help stabilizing her arm when she swiveled to recline. She did so with a wince, but bit it back.

He attached small pads to her upper arm, shoulder, and a small portion of her chest that he connected to electrodes. “These will help stimulate your muscles to further stave off atrophy. I’m going to keep turning up the intensity, but you let me know when you’ve hit your limit.”

She blinked. His face wasn’t impassive necessarily, but it lacked the warmth she always found there, at least when he looked at her. “Okay.”

Leonard powered up the device and started to increase the strength of the electrical pulses. At first, it felt like a gentle tickle, like the bristles of a toothbrush over skin. However, as it ratcheted up, it grew more uncomfortable until it bore a resemblance to the sensation of someone pressing the teeth of a comb into the meat of her arm and dragging them back and forth as hard as they could.

“ _Stop_ ,” she gasped, unable to tolerate it any longer.

He dipped his head in acknowledgment and took it down two notches.

“I’m going to set the timer for twenty minutes to start.” He pushed another series of buttons and a set of flashing numbers appeared on the machine. “You just try and relax and I’ll be back just before you’re done.”

Danielle watched him through slightly glassy green eyes. There was a part of her that wondered if he was joking. That this was all some big show to make her feel better through what promised to be a difficult first day of on-site physical therapy.

But then he turned and was gone and all she could do was count the ceiling tiles and wonder what she’d done wrong.

* * *

Danielle was silent the whole drive home. Though Leonard would periodically catch her grimace when they hit a bump or a pothole in the road, she still didn’t utter a single sound. And when he pulled into the driveway, she unbuckled herself and slipped from the passenger seat without any assistance.

Thankfully, lunch was already waiting for them when they walked in the door and it provided them with something to distract from the tension bubbling beneath the surface.

Of course, food did nothing to divert Grace McCoy’s attention.

She kept a watchful eye on them as they ate in total quiet. Neither so much acknowledged each other’s presence, stuck in a vicious cycle she’d first noticed when they stepped in from the porch.

When their plates were clean, she ordered Leonard to go call Jim, who had conveniently checked in while they were out, and it bought her some time alone with her grandson’s girlfriend.

She picked the old southern way of sweet-talking the truth out by plying her with a hunk of a peanut butter swirl brownie and a half-filled glass of milk. “You look like you could use it. Rough day at therapy?”

Danielle swept a lock of hair behind her ear and nodded. “I think it was just the shock of it.” Ever the lady in present company, she cut off a bite with the side of her fork. “How different it was.”

“Leonard said the facility was very nice, nicer than when he’d last been there. He thought it was on par with what would have been available to you in San Francisco.” She smiled at her. “I’m glad to hear you’re getting the best care possible. I know this has been hard on you.”

“Harder than I thought,” she conceded before the first bite. Her lips quirked with the pleasure of the taste, but she still wasn’t her normally exuberant self.

“It’ll get better,” Grace offered. “It always gets worse before it gets better, but sometimes it helps to talk about.” She reached to rest her hand atop Danielle’s. “I know that I’m his grandmother, but if something is troubling you and you want to talk to me about it, I won’t say anything to him. I get the feeling that you don’t really have a woman in your life to talk to.”

“Leo tell you about my mom?” She tipped her head.

Grace shook hers. “Call it intuition.”

“My maternal grandmother lives in New Orleans and we’re close, but I don’t really get to see her anymore. Calls are too far between for my liking, but that’s more my fault than anything else, really. It’s hard to know what time it is back in Louisiana when you’re in space.” She took a short pull from her glass. “We exchange lots of messages and photos, though.”

“I’m sure she loves you very much and she is _exceptionally_ proud of you.” Grace gave her a little pat. “But my offer still stands regardless, alright? No pressure.”

The elder woman pushed back from the table so that she could fix herself her own plate of dessert. When Leonard returned, she’d make him one, as well, but hopefully that’d be a while knowing Jim and she could get to the bottom of their strife before then.

She was partway in the fridge when a soft voice spoke up from the table. “He left me there.” Danielle’s green eyes lifted to find Grace’s brown ones and then she continued, “He barely spoke to me the whole time. Left me in the therapy room while he had me hooked up to the muscle stimulator and I was done for a little while before he came back. The whole time, he was just- sort of a passive observer. He’d tell me what he wanted me to do, and yes, he’d correct my form, like with the resistance bands, but he didn’t encourage me. Not like he’d been doing at home and I just-“ She blew out a slow breath. “I feel like I’ve done something wrong. It’s not like him. Or maybe he’s ashamed of me? I don’t know.”

Grace regarded her for a few passing moments and then reached back in for the jug of milk.

“Yeah, this definitely calls for a top off.”

* * *

Leonard felt like he’d gone twelve rounds that morning. Walking back into Emory had made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up on end and a pit form in his stomach that sank like a damn _rock_.

He might have even aged a decade in the course of a few hours, considering how slow he was ambling around the house since they returned. His snail-like trudge down the stairs and back into the kitchen was further evidence of that.

If he was being honest with himself (yeah, right), he might actually admit that he hadn’t entirely shaken off the anxiousness, despite the fact it was nearing dinnertime.

“Oh, look who remembered his poor old Gran exists.” His head snapped up to find Grace sitting at the table with a mug of tea and glasses perched on her narrow nose as she flipped through screens on her PADD. She hadn’t even bothered to look up thus far.

He rerouted from his path towards the coffee pot to pad around the table to drop a kiss on her cheek. “Afternoon, Gran.”

“Afternoon, Leo,” she echoed in kind and then took a small sip. “You weren’t very talkative at lunch. How was the first session?”

He he felt the instinct to bristle creep up his spine, but he batted it down out of respect for his grandmother. Instead, Leonard used the new moments it took to pour himself a cup of dark roast (bless her) to carefully choose his words. “I’m pleased with her progress. She did very well for the first day using actual apparatuses. It’s a very difficult transition.”

“I see.” She turned another page. “You know, your sweetheart and I had a very interesting conversation after you went upstairs earlier.”

Well, that was the other shoe dropping if he’d ever heard it.

The smooth flavor of the Colombian coffee exploded over his tongue and he savored every droplet. Quality coffee was in short supply on the Enterprise and it only made his hankering for it grow. Though, this particular cup didn’t warm him like it normally would.

“Call me crazy, but I have the feeling I was the subject of this particular discussion.”

“Hmm.” Gran adjusted her glasses so they slid further up the bridge of her nose. “Now what would make you think that?”

“… thirty-something years of being your grandson?” he offered up with a hefty dose of sarcasm.

It was abundantly clear where he’d gotten his spectacular eye-rolling ability from. “And yet, those powers of observation seem to be on the fritz as of late.”

McCoy drew another small sip of coffee from the mug to bide himself a moment, though his frown came as naturally as breathing. “Come again?”

He watched as she set her cup down on the table and tugged off her glasses. There was a slight moment where his inner six-year-old recoiled, understanding the swift shift in her posture and appearance meant that he was in trouble.

“Have you been purposefully avoiding speaking to her today? If so, I think we really need to have a discussion about using your words that I spent an infuriatingly large amount of time and effort teaching you as a toddler.” She neatly folded her hands atop the table. “If not, I strongly suggest you pull your head from wherever place you’ve stuck it and take a hard look at your behavior this morning.”

Leonard crossed his arms over his chest and groused, “I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about.”

Gran sighed, long-suffering, and returned her glasses to their perch on her nose so that she was able to thumb through the article. “Don’t pout, Leo. It was unbecoming when you were five and it hasn’t aged well at all, my boy. Trust me.”

He continued to stare at her, but seeing as she proceeded to ignore him in favor of reading, it was clear as crystal that he had been dismissed and she was no longer interested in offering her further opinions on the matter. At least, not until he’d spoken to Danielle as directed.

He also had the nagging suspicion that he wouldn’t be entitled to dinner until then either.

* * *

After some searching throughout the house, Leonard found Danielle alone on the porch swing with her PADD in her lap. She’d grown more adept at typing out messages with one hand and Jim, Samantha, Pike, and her grandmother, Emily, seemed to understand the reason for their brevity. Though, they likely appreciated the check-ins that came between phone calls.

He knew that other members of the Enterprise had checked in on her, as well, beyond the thank you messages she’d sent. However, those had been early-on in her recovery while she was still in the hospital and she had forced Leonard to painstakingly write out each one because a canned thank you note wouldn’t be sufficient for her crewmates, even if it was for members of the Admiralty who felt beholden to send gifts and flowers out of some sense of self-serving obligation to her father.

His grandmother, no doubt, would love to hear that story if she hadn’t already.

“Room enough on there for another?”

Danielle’s head turned and she blinked up at him in surprise. Her fair skin was illuminated by the golden tint of the setting sun that had already brushed the sky in pinks and oranges that he had spent a lifetime marveled by prior to serving in Starfleet. It was a scary thought now that he’d seen even more brilliant colors in the sunrise and sunsets on other planets that weren’t even listed in any textbooks he’d read as a child or that current generations perused.

“Sure,” she managed and promptly turned her attention back to the sky.

The silence persisted, yet again, until he broke it. “So… I take it you’re upset with me.”

“I take it you didn’t come to that conclusion on your own.”

The retort was quick and cutting, but lacked the malice he’d endured the last time he had confronted a woman he loved in Georgia. Still, the reminder prickled across his skin.

“I’ve been told that my powers of observation can be lacking at times,” he conceded, self-deprecating as ever. “But then again, that’s why I keep such strong women in my life to cuff me upside the head and point me in the right direction. Sometimes literally, sometimes metaphorically.”

“I hope this was a literal moment.”

That garnered a slight curl of his lips. “Sadly, no. But I got the ‘Disappointed Gran’ look and that usually takes a lot.”

She produced a glass of lemonade that Leonard hadn’t noticed on the end table before and whet her lips with a short drink. “Thank heavens for small miracles.”

“Yeah…” He rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. “So…”

Danielle let out a laugh that sounded half-bitter, half-exhausted. “You really don’t know, do you?” When he shook his head, she tilted hers. “Well, at least I know you’re not mad at me then.”

Her statement startled him. “You thought I was mad at you?”

Her head swiveled and her eyes narrowed at him. “You only spoke _at_ me to give me orders, avoided touching me at all costs, and you left me alone in the therapy room to lie there like an idiot, then didn’t even bother to come back until well after the timer had gone off,” she rattled off and then snapped, “so forgive me if you’re not my favorite person right now.”

“You were my patient then,” he defended, “not my girlfriend.”

“You’ve made that abundantly clear,” she bit back. “But let me ask you this, Leonard: when did you _ever_ see things so black and white after I was shot? Was I merely your patient when you stayed with me ‘round the clock in Medbay until M’Benga all but shoved you out the door to sleep in an actual bed? Or when you took nearly every shift while I was in the hospital so that you could be the one to treat me, even if it meant taking on other patients you’d never met or treated before? When did that switch flip that you needed to put distance between us for the sake of keeping up appearances because I sure as _hell_ don’t know? Or are you just ashamed of me?”

“It wasn’t your-“

“Oh, I _know_ it wasn’t anything I did,” Danielle interrupted him. “All I’ve done since we left that place was rewind the day’s events to think about it and I came up with nothing. I thought, just for a second, that when the receptionist called me _Miss_ Blake and you corrected her that you’d just gotten a little distracted or overwhelmed and you were going to snap out of whatever it was that was making you act that way, but then you _didn’t_.”

“Danielle, come on…” He reached for her knee to try his hand at a comforting gesture. “You have to know that she could flirt with me all she wanted, but I would never-“

“ _Oh my God_.” She flinched away from him and he could see her wince with the force of the shock to her shoulder. “You really think _that_ is why I’m upset?”

He shrunk back a little ways and everything about his body language read _sheepish._ “I mean…”

“Get the fuck over yourself, Leonard McCoy. I’m not some lovesick sixteen-year-old, pining after you,” she practically spat back and struggled her way to her feet with only one arm to lever herself off of the suspended seat. “It’s like you don’t know me at all.”

Leonard was quick to his feet and stooped to try and help her up, but she smacked his hand away.

“ _Don’t_ ,” she growled at him. “Don’t try and help me now. Where the fuck were you _six hours_ ago, when I needed you, Leonard?” Danielle pressed further in challenge, face tight. “When I was scared and in pain and _alone_?”

Whatever words remained on the tip of her tongue never quite tumbled free. Instead, she exhaled one more time through flared nostrils and stormed from the porch and back into the house with a slam of the screen door.

Leonard was sharply reminded of how much he hated the rattling of metal against frame, the way it echoed just as harshly as venomous words left lingering in the air. How many times had he been grateful that his old house had been far enough away from his neighbors that his arguments with Jocelyn couldn’t be heard? That Jo hadn’t been old enough at the time to remember?

At least, the silence would let him be alone in his head long enough to piece together his thoughts to avoid making the situation any worse.

“Well,” a disapproving voice chimed in from behind the wire mesh, “that went swimmingly, Leonard, wouldn’t you agree?”

He dropped his head into his hands. So much for things not getting any worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who follow me on [Tumblr](http://heelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com), you'll recall that I started out writing a fairly fluffy chapter and then things suddenly took a turn. Well, here you have it. And you can totally see where things took a fork in the road.
> 
> I'd also like to thank you all for being so patient with me. My boss went on paternity leave after his wife went into labor at a completely different time than was anticipated and I had to cover all of his cases, while another of my bosses took off for a month-long leave in India. Totally nuts.
> 
> Anyway, I'm hoping to get a bit more regular in my updates. But please do follow me on Tumblr for updates, sneak peaks, etc. I love interacting with you guys there!
> 
> And thank you again to each and every one of you for your incredible reviews. Your support is overwhelming.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Taking relationship advice from a goddamn horse. Unbelievable.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like a doofus, I provided you all with the wrong link to my Tumblr last go around. The correct link is [HERE ](heelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com) (@heelsheadandstandardshigh).
> 
> Thanks to Dana for the catch. I have fixed the link in the last chapter, too.

Dinner was a silent affair.

Leonard had lingered outside for a while after their argument, but found when he dared to step foot inside of his grandmother’s house that Danielle had taken dinner to his room and shuttered herself inside. He wasn’t sure whether the fact that she had physically and emotionally locked him out was worse than the disappointed glances and from Gran across the table.

When he couldn’t even entertain the thought of a second helping, he decided a long walk might help him clear his head. He hadn’t gone exploring since they’d arrived, even on the best of days. Most of his time was spent with Grace or Danielle, though by choice, not obligation.

His wandering brought him down to the stables just as the sun was dipping nearly beyond the line of the horizon. It was already a little cooler, but the barn was warm and he was content to be indoors.

Upon a closer survey of the horses, he noticed that the number of horses had increased since last count. McCoy vaguely recalled Gran had mentioned the addition of a mare and a few foals around the last new year, but they seemed to have grown exponentially since then.

A whinny came from to his left and he turned to find a blue roan had poked his head out to eye Leonard with interest. Intrigued, he approached and the roan maintained its position. A flicker of his gaze to the sign above his stall indicated that the horse was named Mercury and in fact, a _he_.

“So Mercury, huh?” he addressed him with a wry twist to his lips, maintaining eye contact as he neared him. “That after the Roman god or the element?” When Mercury snorted, Leonard laughed. “Yeah, beats me too, buddy.”

He gently stroked Mercury’s mane once he was close enough and found himself chuckling when the roan nudged him with his muzzle, almost expectantly. He hadn’t planned on making his way down to the stables and as such, hadn’t come prepared with good tidings for the equine residents of the McCoy farm.

“Well, you’re a man after my own heart, eh? Knows what he wants.” He tipped back to see if there was anything he might offer his new friend, brows furrowed.

They eventually landed on a bale of hay topped with a small bucket that, on closer inspection, looked like it might hold some apples. He took a few steps towards the container when Mercury whinnied in complaint.

“It’s okay, buddy.” He stroked his neck again. “I’m just gonna get you somethin’ to eat. Promise I’m not leavin’ you.”

Mercury stared him at a moment, but then lowered his head, as if assenting to his departure.

“Glad I have your approval, Merc.” After a few backpedals confirmed that he didn’t think Leonard was leaving, he turned to examine the contents of the bucket and found a half-dozen drop apples. “Ah, do I have a present for you.” He tossed one in the air and caught it, which would have gotten Mercury’s attention if he wasn’t already watching the doctor like a hawk. “See something you like, huh, boy?”

An excited neigh confirmed it and Leonard’s attempts to hush him were ruined by his laughter.

“Careful. You’ll get me in trouble with the others. There’s more of you than there are apples.”

He set the fruit in his palm and offered it up for the taking. Mercury poked it with his nose and then proceeded to snap it up, nipping the fleshier part of his palm between his wrist and pinky.

“Hey. I’ll have you know only my girl gets to give me love bites.” His smile faltered a little and he shook his head rather sadly. “Though, doesn’t look like I’ll be getting some of those anytime soon, even once she’s healed up some more. Fucked up pretty bad, Merc.”

The horse nudged Leonard with his muzzle. He’d been a firm believer that animals were highly perceptive and horses and dogs were at the top of that list. It would seem his new friend affirmed that particular principle.

“My ex-wife once told me I had a problem with communicating, you know.” He picked up a brush from the rack of supplies and unlatched the stall. “Both as a talker and a listener. Double whammy… a real shit combination, you know?”

Mercury nickered sympathetically. 

“I thought maybe I’d gotten better at it. Danielle and I-“ He stopped to come up with the proper way to articulate their relationship. “She never expected me to be anyone except who I was. She didn’t care that I was a workaholic with a piss-poor attitude and an impressively broad vocabulary of expletives, if I do say so myself. Whereas she’s kind and patient.” A small quirk of his lips. “Don’t let her fool you, though. She _will_ take a man’s head off if she needs to in both the literal and metaphorical senses. I always loved that about her. Probably why we were like dynamite the first time we-“

He paused, thinking better of being so crass, even with the horse, and then cleared his throat.

“Anyway.” He blew out a breath, hand now moving in long strokes down his mane. “I fucked up pretty badly. Pretty sure I’m in the doghouse, which is probably the couch tonight.”

The horse exhaled forcefully through his nostrils and then swung his head. The action startled Leonard into taking a step back, but Mercury followed so that he could bump his nose into his neck.

His hazel eyes stared back at him, slightly narrowed in confusion. But when the roan did so again with a little more force that shifted McCoy towards the door, he couldn’t help but laugh.

“Fancy yourself a therapist, huh?” He grabbed him another apple from the drop bucket as a reward for his advice and was pleased when Mercury was a bit gentler. “I guess I’ll come visit you tomorrow and let you know how it goes.” At his answering neigh, Leonard tacked on, “ _Yes_ , I’ll bring you a treat.”

Leonard locked up the stall and secured the barn so that he wouldn’t get an earful from Gran or any of the farmhands in the morning. Only when he crossed the threshold between hay and grass, did he pause and grumble. “Taking relationship advice from a goddamn horse. Unbelievable.”

* * *

McCoy practiced his speech on the way back to his house, revised it as he ascended the porch and then the stairs up to the second level, and had it perfected once he arrived at his bedroom door.

But then he found the knob immovable and realized that Danielle hadn’t unlocked the door after their argument on the porch. Though, calling it an argument was rather generous, as he really hadn’t done anything but stick his foot further into his mouth as she laced into him.

He didn’t know why he jiggled the doorknob. He knew deep down that she wouldn’t make an appearance or let him in, however, it didn’t stop him from standing with his forehead pressed to the wood as if he was trying to entreat her to do so by sheer power of thought or desperation.

After ten minutes of silence, he finally relented and snagged an extra blanket and pillow from the linen closet. He’d enjoyed many naps on Gran’s sofa as a boy and then again as teenager visiting on weekends home from college, sometimes without even realizing he’d drifted off.

Yet on that night, sleep eluded him. There was too much guilt, too many flashbacks to evenings spent on a couch while his wife and daughter slept upstairs.

Leonard wished that he could say the night passed quickly and the sun rose before he knew it, but it was as far from the case as he could get. Instead, the clock ticked torturously slow and he came out haggard on the other side of dawn.

“I see that coffee couldn’t improve your sunny disposition.”

His tired gaze slowly lifted from the contents of his mug to find his grandmother at the sink. Grace’s hair was in its usual neat bun and she had slipped on her apron over her dress.

Leo’s voice came out soft and worn. “It was a rough night.”

“Did you sleep at all?” Despite her disappointment in his behavior, her grandson could see the shift in her features and hear the change in tone. She was _worried_ about him.

At the shake of his head, she immediately began to busy herself with breakfast.

“Alright, here’s the plan,” Gran announced over the din of her whisk scraping against the metal bowl filled with eggs. “I’m going to make you both breakfast, something nourishing because you look like you’re about to keel over.” She tossed a pat of butter into the frying pan. “You’ll eat down here, I’ll bring some up to her, and hopefully, she’ll be a little more tolerant of your presence with some food in her belly.” She pointed the spatula at him. “I’ll nudge her your way the best that I can, but the rest is up to you, Leonard. I hope your groveling skills are up to snuff.”

“I had a lot of time on my hands last night.” He yawned and took a swig of the dark roast. “Spent a good chunk of it brushing up.”

“Good. I expect it was with the advanced texts.” There was the tiniest twitch of her lips. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to give Leonard hope.  If Gran could find a little humor in the situation, perhaps there was a chance that Danielle could find it in her heart to forgive him after all.

* * *

He waited for her on the porch.

It was a little less humid than the day before and if given the opportunity, would be suitable for a walk, so long as Gran was able to work her magic, which was really her wisdom more than anything else.

After about an hour, he heard the creak of the screen door behind him and footfalls that he immediately recognized. Though, he didn’t dare turn around out of a fear she would take one look at him and change her mind.

His patience was rewarded when she sat down beside him on the steps, though on the other side of the wooden panel to keep her distance.

“I’m not going back there today.”

“I know.” He finally gambled to look over at her, just a glance. “I didn’t expect you to.” Leonard inhaled and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I know that I hurt you, but I think- maybe, if I explain myself, you might not-“ Lines etched their way across his forehead as he furrowed his brow. “Hate me, at least.”

She was silent for a few moments. “I don’t hate you.” His head snapped to his right. “That’s not to say I’m not spending a lot of time holding myself back from punching you in the face, though.”

“I deserve that,” he conceded, “but I just want- I want you to know that in my own fucked up way, I acted how I did yesterday _because_ I love you. Which sounds fucking _stupid_ after hearing myself say it out loud.”

“Maybe, I’d be the better judge of that.”

And in that moment, he saw the tiniest spark of something in her green irises, a flash of where they’d been two days ago. So he ran with it. “Walk with me then?” he ventured.

She dipped her head shortly thereafter and he couldn’t help but think that Gran’s cooking might just be magical.

“Help me up?” She gestured to her slinged arm.

Leonard twisted on the step and slid closer so he could wrap an arm around her shoulders and assist her in standing. She’d become a bit less like a baby bird and a little more like a young doe finding her footing.

Still, he relished the contact he’d felt the loss of so strongly, even if he did eventually let go. His steps were as long as they ever were, but he kept them slow and measured so as to defer to her damaged sense of equilibrium.

A quarter of the way to the stables, he found himself breaking the silence. “When I told you about how my father died, I didn’t give you the full picture.” He slid his hands into his pockets, making himself look less sure of himself and more vulnerable. “I left Georgia when I lost custody of Joanna, but it wasn’t only that.”

She decided she would bite. “What else was it?”

“I have to go back to the beginning or so to explain. When I agreed to do what my father asked of me, I needed…” A fresh wave of grief washed over him. “I didn’t just flip a switch. There are drugs that can be used at the end and I-“ His next inhale was shaky. “In Medbay, every drug is accounted for. We give our fingerprint when we prepare hyposprays, or alternatively, nurses or junior doctors will in the chain of command. But there’s always a trail, from the doctor’s diagnosis on the chart and the report to the personnel that assisted in the care of the patient. Means nothing can go missing without us knowing.”

She bobbed her head to show that she was listening, but her brain had already taken issue with his explanation and begun to process its implications. After a couple of minutes of silence, she thought she might have put it together. Or at least, a piece.

“Is that how it works at the hospitals, too?” A beat, then, “At Emory?”

“Yes.” His eyes flicked to her. “They had my fingerprint, but it was a few days until they cross-referenced the medical records and chains of custody and found that I hadn’t made any notes of treatment with that particular drug. My father-“ His voice broke and his head dipped, face overwhelmed with shame. “He was dying, but he had a couple of months left. Agonizing months of suffering, but still months. Didn’t take them very long to put two and two together.”

Danielle traced her fingers over the outline of the sling’s strap, where it dug into her skin. Despite the smooth material being light, her arm was not. “I take it that’s not the end of the story.”

He shook his head. “The ethics board opened an inquiry shortly after his funeral and word spread pretty fast throughout the hospital. By then, Jocelyn had already been having an affair with Clay for a while and was set on divorcing me. She got sole custody because she’d managed to get copies of the reports as they were being compiled- her father’s pretty well-connected in Georgia- and threatened to turn them over to the judge, which would have ensured I never saw Joanna again. So…” His feet drew him to a halt at one of the wooden fence posts outside of the barn where the horses were taken for short work. “I practically sold my soul just to get whatever contact with Jo she was willing to offer. I didn’t fight her, gave up custody, the house, everything I really owned, just to be able to call my daughter.  
  
“As it turned out,” he added, voice changing from resigned to bitter, “not only was a cure discovered for my father’s disease a few weeks later, but the Board cleared me of wrong doing. Apparently, Dad had been mumbling about ending it for a while before he worked up to askin’ me. Nurses overheard him. And it was enough to qualify as a patient’s request to end his life where the diagnosis is terminal, satisfying the legal requirements.”

“I made so many decisions too quickly, Danielle.” Leonard rested his forearms against the horizontal slat of dark wood. “Cost me my father, my daughter. My mother, too, eventually.”

Danielle’s heart broke for him. He had progressively let her into his tragic experiences, but she had thought that his admission on their first day in Georgia had been the last of them. Unfortunately, it felt as though Leonard’s short life had been fraught with heartbreak.

“I don’t understand, though.” She kept her distance, still. “About Emory…” she started to clarify, but he cut her off.

“They know me there, still,” he started to explain. “Everyone looked at me at that hospital six and a half years ago and knew what I’d done. I can’t even begin to describe their faces then and I didn’t want to endure it again. I didn’t want to be Dr. McCoy, who is sleeping with his patient that he’d been too emotional to be trusted with on his table when her life was on the line.” His head slowly turned. “I didn’t want you to be looked at that way either and I didn’t want you to feel ashamed.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she demanded, though not as venomously as she might have done earlier. “We may have kept our relationship secret for the sake of professionalism on the ship, but I have always been proud of you. And I’m a little ashamed, myself, to tell you how relieved I am that everyone knows about us now.” Danielle joined him at the fence, free arm also resting on the wood. “But you and I both agreed, once upon a time, to hide the fact there _was_ an us from everyone. You shouldn’t have underestimated me on this occasion.”

McCoy blew out a small breath. “You’re right.”

There was a twitch at the corner of her mouth he desperately prayed he hadn’t imagined. “Shall I record that for Jim? Spock, maybe?”

“I think we’ve had enough earth-shattering revelations for one day.” His knuckles loosened and he shifted his hand to brush his pinky against hers. “I’m sorry, darlin’. You deserved better than how I treated you.”

“You were a _total_ asshole,” she remarked by way of agreement, then stretched her fingers to cover his, “but now that I know, you’re a little _less_ of one. And definitely beneath the maximum threshold of what I’m willing to tolerate from the men I’m involved with.”

“ _Men,_ huh _?”_ He managed to grin at that.

“I’m a one-man kind of a woman, right now.” She shrugged, feigning innocence. “There’s this one guy who’s really got my attention. No one else quite compares. So… maybe I’m willing to put up with a little more bullshit than normal.”

She hadn’t heard him laugh so earnestly in a long time. “I’m going to kiss you now, but I wanted to give you a heads up because I know how excellent your dexterity can be with both hands in the event you’re inclined to deck me.”

“There was definitely a sexual overture in there somewhere.” She grinned. “But, come on. You really think I’d bruise that handsome face?” Her fingers stroked along his shadowed jaw. “You’re not Jim, you know.”

“Thank God for small miracles,” McCoy grumbled in the moments before he leaned in to kiss her. It was short and sweet, surprisingly chaste for them, but then again, they’d had to be for a while now. “And horses.”

She took a breath with her eyes still closed. “Horses?”

“It’s a long story.” He curled his large hand around the back of her neck to draw her closer again so that he could kiss her forehead. “How’d you sleep last night?”

“Like shit. You?”

“Worse.” Leonard slid his fingers down her back to wrap his arm around her waist so he could start to lead her back to the house. “What do you say we go steal some cookies from Gran’s jar and abscond with them to the bedroom. She might be so happy that we’ve patched things up that she will ignore our blatant theft.”

She poked him in the ribs. “Oh, shut up. You just want to cuddle.”

He grinned, boyish and charming, a sight she’d sorely missed. “That, too.”

* * *

“Dr. McCoy,” a familiar drawl greeted him at the reception desk of the physical therapy facility. “I was surprised not to see you the past couple of days. Started to get a little worried.”

“Mighty kind of you to be concerned with the well-being of my patient.” He accepted the PADD she offered to him and traced his finger over the screen, eyes following.

Jessica tilted her head. “Oh. I-“ She cleared her throat. “Well, yes, but- I guess I’m just used to seeing our doctors here more regularly. I looked to see if we had your number on file, but it looked like it hadn’t been updated in a number of years. Perhaps, we could exchange numbers? You know, just in case.”

His head lifted from his previous attention on the screen and McCoy’s eyebrows knit together. “In case of what, exactly?”

Jessica stuttered and stammered indiscernibly, trying to come up with some form of answer that made sense, when Danielle stepped in to offer her an escape hatch.

“For God’s sake, Leo.” She rolled her eyes, glinting with mirth. “Don’t tell me you haven’t updated your contact information since 2255.”

“Well, you know…” He waved his PADD demonstratively. “I was a little busy with advanced medical courses and patching up drunk cadets a decade younger than me on the weekends, while trying not to be crippled by my paralyzing aviophobia. Then I was stuck in a tin can, treating our idiot captain, while again trying not to be crippled by my paralyzing aviophobia. So sorry it didn’t cross my mind.”

“For the record, I’ve never _once_ seen you have an episode.”

“Because I _worked on it_. Jesus, woman. You sound like Gran.”

“I take that as a compliment.” And she did, smiling to that effect.

Jessica, on the other hand, looked _horrified_. “Well.” She coughed. “I can update that for you, if you’d like. Especially if there’s an emergency with your patient and we need to get in touch with you. Or she does.”

Leonard snorted. “If she does, I imagine, she’ll just turn over and shake me until I wake up. Not sure if that’s better or worse than my sister poking me awake as a kid.”

If Danielle’s arm wasn’t in a sling, she’d have folded them together and huffed indignantly. “Excuse you. I am very gentle about it.”

“I’m sorry,” the other woman interjected. “Are you- I didn’t realize you were conducting additional treatment in an outpatient facility. It’s- it’s very honorable that you’re providing round-the-clock care.”

The look he shot her clearly evidenced his marvel at just how thickheaded (or in denial) the receptionist was. “Outpatient facility? Lady, we’re staying with my grandmother until Danielle is fit to fly again.”

The ‘ _are you stupid?’_ was silent, but the blonde heard it loud and clear.

“The food alone is worth it. Company’s a lot better, too. Even if he shakes the bedroom with his snores. Gran’s overall awesomeness makes up for it.”

Jessica looked like she was about to have an aneurism. Or a heart attack. Maybe, a stroke.

“I don’t understand…”

“Dr. Blake and I have been seeing each other for… a year and a half now.” McCoy cut to the chase. However, he purposefully omitted the details of those calculations, as they’d long ago agreed that their friends with benefits arrangement counted, though they considered their date at Alfonso’s to be their actual anniversary. “S’pose we’re just used to keeping things professional.”

“Don’t let his surly exterior fool you, Jessica. He can really be a teddy bear once he’s had his morning coffee.”

Leonard groaned beside her and tucked his tablet beneath his arm. “Darlin’, you’re gonna ruin my reputation as a tyrannical overlord.”

“Eh. I’ve done worse. Blew up a Jeffries tube once in front of our Chief Engineer. Learned a lot of Scottish curses that day I never knew existed. Like-“

“Okaaaaay,” he interrupted and shook his head. “We’re going to get moving now. Nice to see you, Jessica. On you go, darlin’. We’ve got a lot on the schedule today.”

They took a few steps towards the belly of the facility, but Danielle couldn’t resist pausing to toss over her shoulder, “Don’t worry. If he’s too stubborn to give you his number for the records, I’ll do it myself. See you around.”

Once they were safely in the otherwise empty confounds of the elevator, Leonard whistled. “That was _cold_.”

“You tried to politely drop hints, as politely as you’re capable of anyway, and it’s not my fault she was being willfully ignorant. After that, I couldn’t let her go on thinking you weren’t spoken for. I may only have one arm at my disposal, but I can still fire a phaser and throw a hell of a punch.”

“Did I say cold?” He shook his head and made a feeble attempt to withhold a burgeoning grin. “I meant to say hot. _Really, really_ hot.”

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello from sunny and hot San Juan, Puerto Rico! For those of you who follow me on [Tumblr](heelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com) (@heelsheadandstandardshigh), you know that I left last week on a cruise. While I get a lot of writing done (and caught up on the Autobiography of James T. Kirk plus a few Academy paperbacks), I couldn't post anything due to expensive internet. This one has been ready to go for a few days now.
> 
> I'm waiting here for my flight to Austin, Texas in the airport, so yay wifi! I'm also in a fancy lounge thanks to my club access card, so I'm lounging in a fancy recliner with a free bar at my disposal (spoiler alert: it's freaking AWESOME).
> 
> Annnyyyyhooooo. Thank you to all of you who continue to read and/or review. Your support is greatly appreciated.
> 
> Hoping to get some more writing done on the trip out to Austin. With a layover in Tampa, it's about six hours, so maybe I can bang out another chapter? Here's to wishful thinking.
> 
> I got a couple of messages asking me if I have facecast Gran and if so, with whom, so I thought I should let you all know the answer. While most of you know that Amber Heard is Danielle Blake, I've always thought of Rosemary Harris (Aunt Mae, Spiderman 1-3) as Gran.
> 
> Hope all is well, my friends! LLAP!


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If Leonard were here, that’d launch him into a tirade, you know.”
> 
> M’Benga’s eyebrows rose. “Why do you think I reserved that comment for you alone?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being MIA for a while. A few personal things finally evened out, but then others popped up and things really kicked up at work. Ergo, no time to write.
> 
> Hopefully, this is the start of more frequent updates as we really start to approach the start of Star Trek Into Darkness. I’m still figuring out how and where I want to pick up, but the ideas are crystallizing in my head now. Woot.
> 
> Thank you for your continued support. I hope you all enjoy!
> 
> If you’d like to keep track of the status of chapters and see sneak peeks, please feel free to find me on Tumblr [HERE](%E2%80%9DHeelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com%E2%80%9D). 
> 
> My dear friend let me know I linked incorrectly last time, so please note this is the correct one!

The paperwork was signed on a Tuesday.

As advanced as Starfleet was, and as comparatively antiquated as the practice might be, Dr. Leonard McCoy and Dr. Danielle Blake had submitted a notarized declaration to their superiors at Starfleet that they were in a relationship, with the knowledge of their commanding officer. Once upon a time, Chris Pike would have been the one to formally sign off on the document.

Now, Jim Kirk had vouched for their professionalism and sent the form off to the powers-that-be on the very same day.

The acceptance of the declaration by the brass allowed Leonard to remain Danielle’s primary physician on board the Enterprise, but removed the power to declare her fit or unfit for duty when a situation that tested said fitness arose.

* * *

 

She returned to San Francisco on a Thursday.

It was only for five to seven days, but McCoy felt the temporary loss acutely. Danielle had traveled back on her own for an appointment with Dr. M’Benga, as McCoy’s unofficial second-in-command in Medbay. Her sister had tagged along for moral support, but ultimately remained in the waiting area to allow the elder Blake some privacy.

Geoff tested her range of motion through basic stretches and exercises, dexterity with much of the same. He examined the entry site of the wound (more familiar than most would have been, considering he’d performed the surgery that saved her life, not to mention her arm) and then later, took several scans to confirm that the nerves and tissue had regenerated to their former, peak form.

It was difficult for Danielle to avoid comparing M’Benga and McCoy in a professional setting. Where Geoff was always soft-spoken and gentle when performing any tests, Leonard was chattier with her, usually trying his hand at sarcasm that would be sure to garner laughter. Their bedside manner greatly varied, but they shared a profound similarity: an utmost care for their patients.

“I never had the opportunity to thank you,” she spoke up after a prolonged period of silence while he reviewed the three-dimensional imagery. “Though, I don’t even know where to start, honestly.”

The corner of his mouth rose in a way that only one side of his lips curled. “There’s no reason to start.”

“I beg to differ.” She was seated on the edge of the biobed, legs swinging a little in midair. “If it wasn’t for you, I would be dead. Forget the arm, I’d have bled out before it even became a discussion.”

“Dr. McCoy would have done just as I did.” He gave the base a little twist and craned his neck, a bit unnecessarily.

“Except I wasn’t on his table, I was on _yours_. Geoff—“ She wrung her fingers together in her lap. “You saved my life.”

The schematic remained static on the small table for a short while before he abandoned it in favor of tapping out notes on his PADD. “Well, my motives weren’t entirely altruistic. He would have been insufferable without you to keep him in check. Though, knowing what I know now-“ The half-smile turned into a quirk of lips. “It’s not as surprising as it once was.”

Danielle’s posture relaxed a fraction and her legs swung a little over the side of the exam table. “It’s good to know that we weren’t actually kidding ourselves when we tried to keep it quiet,” she laughed softly, rolling her green eyes at herself. “Would you believe it if I told you that Spock was the first one to figure it out?”

Geoff tapped a finger on the projection to shut it down. “The more I think about it, the more I’m unsure whether to be shocked or not. For all the time I’ve spent with Vulcans, I’ve come to realize that they have the astute perception of body language of a psychotherapist, but with the emotional regard of tree bark.”

The blonde let out a laugh at that, further amused because Geoff _had_ spent an immense amount of time with Vulcans during his internship on their planet several years earlier during med school.

“If Leonard were here, that’d launch him into a tirade, you know.”

M’Benga’s eyebrows rose. “Why do you think I reserved that comment for you alone?” The corner of his mouth twitched. “Alright, let’s get you in for your field eval. You bring your uniform?” She dipped her head in assent and her eyes darted momentarily to her duffel bag in the corner.  “Good. I’ll leave you to change and then bring you down to the simulation center. Don’t worry, we’ll go over the parameters so you shouldn’t feel out of sorts.”

“O-okay.” She nodded, pointing and flexing her feet.

Geoffrey crossed the room so that he was standing only a foot before her and held out his left palm. “Take my hand.”

Brows furrowed and brain puzzled, she placed her right hand within his. “Like this?”

“Exactly like this.” He just held his arm there for a while, keeping it upright to support her own limb. “You feel that?”

“Uh, no… not really?”

“The twitch of your fingers, the way your palm sinks further into mine the longer you leave it there to avoid straining,” Geoff pointed out. “You couldn’t do that a month ago, Danielle. I didn’t _know_ whether you’d _ever_ be able to do that again a month ago.” He placed his other hand atop her knuckles to cocoon them between. “You overcame something extremely traumatic, physically and emotionally. The rest?” He scoffed and gently lowered her digits back to her knees. “That’s a piece of cake by comparison.”

She studied him for a spell. “Geoff.”

“Yes?”

“Why on _Earth_ are you still single?”

M’Benga let out a hearty laugh in the face of that question. “There aren’t enough hours in the day to answer that question, Danielle. Just ask my mother.”

* * *

The smoke filled the room and clogged her lungs. Somewhere in the back of her mind, Danielle knew that this was just a simulation and she wasn’t actually at risk of asphyxiating with the possibility of intervention of observers. But it _felt_ real to the point where her subconscious couldn’t tell the difference.

And really, that was precisely the point.

There was an explosion somewhere on her right that threw her sideways and sent her left side barreling into a railing shoulder-first. It smarted almost instantly and she registered that it was, in fact, her bad shoulder. Though, maybe referring to it as such was merely a force of habit at that point.

Regardless, she made her way to her feet and pressed forward with her phaser drawn, even as waves of heat licked at her ankles and she could feel the blood welling to the surface beneath her skin where it had contacted the metal with immense force.

Leonard was going to take one look at her and be ready to kill someone, she was sure of that. But if she wasn’t cleared for duty after the simulation, he likely wouldn’t get the chance.

She’d decided days ago she wouldn’t return to Georgia if she was unfit for duty. Danielle would have to consider her options and see what Starfleet was prepared to offer her in terms of a planetary posting somewhere, possibly Earth, maybe somewhere else. New Vulcan was as good of a possibility as any.

Irrespective of where she ended up, she understood that McCoy would have a decision to make, too. Part of her wanted him to return to his position on the Enterprise because he was damn good, if not incredible, at his job and he was responsible for the lives of so many. While M’Benga would make a great replacement in the line of succession, it wasn’t the same.

She also realized that if she was around when he had to make such a decision, her mere presence would be an undue influence on him. It was better to leave him alone with his grandmother, who would have his best interests at heart and council him as only she could.

If Grace’s heart told her that Leonard should return to the Enterprise without her and maintain some sort of long-distance relationship or worse yet, get on with his life, she would have to accept that.

* * *

Danielle collapsed into a heap on her couch, not even bothering to attempt to make it to the bedroom. She didn’t think that her legs (or her lungs) could take it, really, and the sofa was like lying on a cloud, wrapped in the wings of an angel.

Or she was just _really_ fucking exhausted.

Either way, the peace didn’t last as the door opened and she was met with the chattiness of her sister, yapping away on her comm. The elder Blake promptly chucked a pillow at her head that the more alert brunette batted away, but not before disconnecting her call.

“Uncalled for,” she remarked with a click of her tongue.

“Got the job done though, didn’t it?” she groused. “I was almost asleep.”

Samantha rolled her brown eyes and breezed by the couch on her way to the kitchen. “You still are. Looks like you’re about to pass out any second, anyway.”

“Nice. Way to respect your elders. See if I let you continue to crash here when I’m not—“ The sentence broke off and Danielle fell silent.

The younger sister dropped her bag onto the kitchen counter and turned to eye her from across the room. “When do they tell you?”

“Anytime within the next week.” She blew out a slow breath and then barked out a bitter laugh. “Can you fucking believe the audacity? I spend nearly six weeks enduring painful rehab, in agony sometimes. I’m either good to go or I’m not. But no, no… you take your sweet _fucking time_ and then let me know when it’s convenient for you, seven days or so should be good. Not like I’m waiting around or anything.”

“And in the meantime, you get to go insane.” She leaned back against the granite. “But you know, I don’t think it’s just your posting that’s on your mind, is it?” When met with silence, Samantha continued, “Have you talked to him about the possibility?”

Danielle shook her head, not really caring whether Sam could see if from where she stood. “When I had a really bad first day of rehab, back at the house, he told me that he wouldn’t go back without me, but he was also trying to cheer me up a little, so I can’t be sure if he was entirely serious or not.”

“You and I both know that he was,” her sister challenged with narrow eyes. “You can try and bullshit yourself, but you can’t bullshit _me_.”

“He deserves better than to be chained to someone like me.”

“Are you _high_?” Samantha moved swiftly through the expanse of hardwood floor until she was looming over the back of the couch. “Someone who is brilliant and funny, kind-hearted. Not to mention, someone academically and professionally accomplished, a distinguished lieutenant commander in Starfleet with an outstanding service record and a forthcoming commendation for her sacrifice in the field to protect her captain? _Danielle_.” She planted her forearms on the top of the cushion, almost daring her to counter her statement. “You’ve always let your accomplishments be diminished by Dad’s shadow. _Open your eyes._ You’re a better person than he ever was.”

* * *

The call came in at one in the morning on a Sunday. The voice on the end of the line apologized, both for the late call and the wait. Her brain was still too fuzzy from sleep to process much, but she heard enough to understand five words: “You’ve been recertified for duty.”

* * *

It was only on the red-eye back to Atlanta that she understood what had happened. They had officially recertified her at the end of the simulation, but the more senior members of the panel held more than a modicum of resentment for Starfleet’s golden boy, Captain Jim Kirk.

Seeing as they couldn’t take out their frustration on him, they decided to make his SOO suffer.

Samantha had lamented to Jim they hadn’t told her yet, Jim was surprised they hadn’t issued their decision (no one actually makes it past 48 hours without hearing), and then later, M’Benga explained it to him in confidence when he understood what was afoot.

Geoff had called her in the wee hours of the morning to put her mind at ease. Unofficially, of course.

But he'd no doubt saved her sanity in the process.

* * *

Leonard awoke to someone abusing his grandmother’s doorbell at eight thirty in the morning and started spewing language that would have earned him a sharp cuff to the back of the head.

On the subject of Gran, he was a bit surprised that she hadn’t been roused by the cacophony, but he figured that she could sleep through anything these days. Bless her.

He peeled back the door, his dirtiest scowl etched on his features and the filthiest words on his tongue that he could come up with.

Then his morning promptly was flipped onto its head and every trace of anger washed away.

“Danielle?”

His hazel eyes roamed over her on the porch. There were a pair of suitcases at her side and he could only assume she’d taken an overnight shuttle, emphasized by her rumpled appearance and messy bun.

“What-“ He squinted against the assailing sunlight and pushed back the door enough that his body consumed the space in the doorway. _“When_?”

“I caught the three am shuttle.”

Her voice was surprisingly nonchalant and chipper for that hour of the morning. “Darlin’, you should have called…”

“Why, you got another woman here?” Her smile was lopsided, green eyes glinting up at him. “I just—I got the call and I wanted to—“

“ _What call_?” He hadn’t even had his damn coffee yet. “You’re not making any sense.”

“Leo.” Her grin radiated like a supernova. “I’m being reinstated, effective March 1st.”

Leonard blinked at her. It was too hot, too sunny, too goddamn early in the fucking morning. Yet, he might have just discovered the one thing that made it so he didn’t care.

He was on the wood panels before he realized it, barefoot as he gathered up her suitcases to haul them inside. Leonard had been careful to give her as much space as she’d needed while she was in San Francisco, concerned that constant check ins would cause her nerves to spike even more. That was the last thing she needed.

He was still half-asleep and not fully able to process the whole significance of her words, but he was awake enough for it to sink in.

“Come on.” He nudged her forward with his shoulder. “Lemme get some coffee going and you can tell me all about it. Gran’s still asleep, but I’m sure I can rustle us up some breakfast and she can join us when she gets up…”

“…Gran isn’t home, Leo.”

“What?”

“Gran isn’t—“

“No, I got that part.” McCoy rubbed a hand over his face. “How did you know she wasn’t here?”

“Well, her car is gone for one,” she ticked off. “And two, I sent her away.”

Leonard fumbled and then dropped the handle of the suitcase, causing it to thud onto the hardwood. “What?”

She tugged the door shut until the lock clicked and then took a few steps closer. It was nearly criminal how cute he looked when both exhausted and confused, with a dash of disheveled. “I made plans about ten days ago, when I found out when my eval would be. Your grandmother was kind enough to offer to leave us by ourselves today so that we could have some alone time and I booked two nights at a hotel for her and a friend in the city. It’s a spa, so… they’re having a girls’ weekend and I think—“

When Danielle paused for a moment to take a real look at him, she realized that Leonard was giving her a slightly vacant stare and was completely lost.

“Leo, it didn’t matter whether I pass or not. Well, that’s not true, actually.” A snort. “It _did_ , but still. Today’s February 14th.

“… it’s Valentine’s Day,” he acknowledged, now that his brain was starting to catch up.

And as it did so, he realized Gran had left a pot of coffee out for him prior to departing. He ducked his head a little as he turned to pour a mugful for each of them. Sheepish. “There’s no use hiding it; I didn’t remember. Shit.”

Her fingers wandered across the countertop to brush up against his elbow. “Last year, you bought me chocolate and made us lunch in bed.” Because they’d missed breakfast. “And we weren’t even technically in a relationship yet. Besides, we’ve been dealing with so much shit lately, I can hardly blame you.” He opened his mouth to protest, but she shook off the attempt. “I didn’t get you anything last year, so we’ll call it even after this and have a clean slate next year.”

He turned enough that she could see his whole face, lips curled at the corners. There was a light in his eyes that made him look suddenly so much younger that it stole her breath.

Danielle was puzzled as to what had caused him to react in such a manner, but when she replayed the conversation a few times in her head, she realized precisely what had been the catalyst: _We’ll call it even after this and have a clean slate next year._

“You know…” Her teeth drew along her lower lip, gaze averting for just a moment. “Active duty wasn’t the only thing I was cleared for.” Pink tinted her fair skin. “Since, you know, we’re celebrating.”

It took far less time for that particular penny to drop than anything else that morning.

Before she knew what hit her, Leonard had her crowded up against the refrigerator door, fingers spread into her hair and an arm taut around her waist. He hadn’t kissed her so soundly or with such intent since not long after the turn of the year and she found her knees growing weak in a way that made her chuckle in the back of her mind.

But then it was gone and she found herself gasping. Not for air, but for more.

“Wait.” Leonard’s chest heaved with the force of his panting. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—“ He blew out another steadying breath as his forehead lowered to rest against hers, nose nudging hers. “I don’t want you to feel that I’m pushing you to do anything you’re not ready for.”

“No!” She unfurled her fingers from his shirt to frame his face with her hands. “ _No_. I’ve missed this, missed you being able to touch me without thinking you’ll break me. I know that six weeks has been a pretty large dry spell for us…”

“Darlin’,” he huffed out a laugh, “before you, my dry spell was _six years_.”

“Okay, well…” She laughed warmly and lifted her chin so that their mouths could connect again and she smiled into the kiss. “Let’s make sure that doesn’t happen again, yeah?”

Leonard hummed, low in his throat, and she felt the vibrations of his chest against his hers. “Yes, m’am.”

* * *

It was a little after three in the afternoon on Valentine’s Day when Danielle awoke with her right, no-longer-bad arm wedged underneath her, left draped across Leonard’s stomach, and her head pillowed on his chest.

After a couple of minutes, she realized his breathing was not as deep and even as when he was asleep, which meant he had been awake for longer than she had.

“Don’t be creepy,” she chided him with a click of her tongue.

McCoy’s large hand traversed the length of her spine, leaving goosebumps in its wake. “You knew what you were getting into.”

“Or maybe, I just have Stockholm Syndrome.”

His eyebrow arched just in time for her to lift her head to look up at him. “… as I recall, _you_ were the one who kissed _me_ first, Dr. Blake.”

She grumbled something in reply that sounded similar to a _whatever_ and snuggled back into his warm skin. Danielle hadn’t realized how much she had been yearning for this contact while she’d been recovering. It had only been in the last two weeks that they had managed to find a comfortable way to maintain some form of contact while they slept, mere days since the discovery that they could spoon so long as she slept on her left side.

At the time, it had felt so good to wake up in his arms again that she could have cried.

This was _so much_ better than that.

“I wouldn’t have gone back without you,” Leo spoke up suddenly and let his words hang in the air for a few beats. “You know that, right?”

What he didn’t disclose was just how much he’d planned for as a contingency. He knew there was a position available to him at the Starfleet Teaching Hospital, that was made clear to him when he had been there as her attending during her stay. There were also a few opening for instructors in varying levels of the medical track at the Academy, as well as a position in the biology department at Emory that he’d been courted for the past two years that they hadn’t managed to fill.

Each allowed him to stay by her side in whatever position Starfleet reassigned her to or whether she opted to leave altogether.

Some part of him wanted her to know just how far he’d go for her, but another understood that deep down, she probably already knew. He didn’t need to provide her with all of the details.

Danielle rolled over so that she could half-draped herself across his body, hands sliding into his dark, thick hair for the leverage and contact she desired as she kissed him. There were no words exchanged, only breaths in the silence.

 _Yeah,_ he thought to himself. _She knows_.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I decided I wanted you around long before that, sweetheart.” Her fingers curled where they laid at her side to graze over the edge of his knee. “High rate of injury working in weapons, you know. Very useful to have a doctor who’s practically on call.”
> 
> Leo intentionally dragged his scruff along her lower back to make her jump. “So that’s how it is? You using me for my MD?”
> 
> “And your body,” she added. “Don’t forget that. Really enjoying all the sex.”

It had been difficult for Leonard to say goodbye to Gran when he had just mended that fence and settled back into the comfort of the family home, a warmth he hadn’t felt in nearly a decade. He’d clung to her a little too tightly before they departed and felt his eyes sting with unshed tears when she’d embraced Danielle fiercely. She’d demanded a promise that neither doctor be a stranger—in person or over video calls-- and insisted they’d both always have a place with her in Georgia.

Danielle pretended not to notice his glassy eyes as he stared out the window of the cab in silence, but held his hand and kept him close all the same.

Without an injured patient to fuss over, his aviophobia reared its head from time to time on board the cross-country shuttle with a creak or a bump. He trusted the Enterprise, which had kept him safe under even the most drastic of pressure and intimidating of forces. He trusted all of the helmsman, especially Sulu, and wouldn’t blink at the thought of his life being in the hands of Scotty by virtue of the ship.

This was an unknown pilot, an unknown craft, an unknown engineer.

And that was all three-too-many unknowns for him.

But Danielle had kept him steady when she saw his eyes start to dart or his knuckles strain under a firmer grip of the armrest. Her distractions began with stories of their most absurd missions, Spock’s most infuriating quotes, and Chekov’s most incredulous assertions about Russian inventions. Though, when they began a bumpy descent and his face started to pale, she moved onto some of their greatest hits.

Her curiosity about the possibilities of finding a room on the ship in which they could isolate themselves in zero gravity, however, seemed to break through the panic just fine.

Debarking and grabbing their bags went smoothly, and obtaining a taxi was as simple as entering a roped-off queue.

Everything about returning to San Francisco made it feel as though their relationship was new all over again. The same feeling of a broken soul knit back together once more, the feeling of coming home.

Electricity crackled between them in the car, pressed together in the backseat from hip to thigh. His hand had made its perch atop her kneecap, thumb stroking over the sensitive spot just at the crease where her thigh met her calf beneath the hem of her pale pink sundress with scattered maroon roses. Perhaps, her zero-g confession had stuck with Leonard more than she’d realized.

A little emboldened, she uprighted her palm so that she could drag her nails up and down the length of his forearm. A quick glance noted that his skin was vastly more bronze upon their return to California than their departure and it gave him a vivacious appearance that reflected the healing that had no doubt started in his heart.

It was only a fleeting thought because the sensation made him start a little and drew a giggle from her lips. In response (or maybe, retaliation), his head swiveled and he ran the tip of his nose along the stem of her neck to draw a line up to her jaw.

It was a greater public display of affection than either was accustomed to, but it was welcome all the same.

Even the driver didn’t seem to mind after a rather gracious tip.

Danielle just wasn’t sure that the neighbors would feel quite the same way if they came home to find Leonard had her back pressed up against the door with his hand hooked underneath her bare lower thigh as they kissed with reckless abandon.

Thank God, they’d managed to pick a Tuesday afternoon to come home when everyone else in the building was most likely at work.

Maybe it was because it was the first time she had felt remotely like herself since her injury, when sadness and despair had taken up residence in every corner of the apartment afterwards. It had even followed her to Georgia.

Or perhaps, because they had both healed during the course of their time away: Danielle physically and Leonard emotionally. He felt whole in a way he hadn’t since the death of his grandfather, father, and mother in fairly quick succession. He still yearned to see his daughter, but he felt a sense of renewed purpose. That maybe, in the near future, he could fight to get her back again. That he _deserved_ to be a father to Joanna, no matter what his ex-wife thought.

It was a potentially reparable loss and those were so few and far between.

Whatever it was, it felt like the first time she’d brought him home after they’d started sleeping together. They had gone out to a bar miles from HQ and the Academy and came home in a slightly dilapidated shuttle car, buzzed, giggling, and a little clumsy, but with eager and wandering limbs.

She had constantly needed to shush him as they stumbled to her door at the end of the hall, the hour well past midnight on a Saturday, and he had struggled to take his hands off of her long enough to get her keycard swiped.

Over a year later, his fumbling was not much different. Only this time, Leonard had his own keycard that she had given him shortly after they’d embarked on an official relationship so that he could come and go as he pleased, even if she wasn’t home. He could slide the card and the screen would promptly flash _Dr. Leonard McCoy – Guest._

But this time, once he’d skimmed the card through the reader, a new message was displayed: _Dr. Leonard McCoy – Resident._

He nearly dropped the card on the floor. It was only then he looked up at the space an inch beneath the peep hole and noticed the small label had been replaced with familiar handwriting: _D. Blake & L. McCoy._

When he regained his power of speech, he pinned her wrists above her head so that he could mouth at her neck unimpeded. “This your way of asking me to move in with you, Darlin’?” he drawled once he’d reached the spot just behind her ear lobe.

She hummed, low in her throat. “This is my way of letting everyone know that, as far as I’m concerned, you already _have_. _”_

He relinquished her arms and tipped back so that he could see her face, caress her cheek. It was a momentary flash of tender awe, but it was soon interrupted by his arm around her back to brace her while he shoved open the door and crushed their lips together. She returned the kiss with equal aplomb, slightly dizzied when he spun them and kept pressing her back until it forced the door shut. She felt the recoil as it settled in the frame and trembled.

His tongue traced the seam of her lips before they parted and he could give chase to hers, dueling and tangling and sliding. He was everywhere all at once with his body crowding her, bracketing her slender frame. Hands in hair, curved over her shoulders, gripping her hips, and grasping her thigh.

Danielle’s hold on him was just as fierce and just as tight. She had fought to get her life back from the brink of death and part of what that existence entailed were moments like this one, a life with _him_ and everything that came with it.

She fumbled with his belt in the infinitesimal space between them and it took a few tries before she could unbuckle it and haul it free. Neither even heard it clatter on the floor.

Before long, his jeans were slung low on his hips and her dress hiked high around her waist so that her legs could wrap around him. Spurred further by the haze of lust, they found just the right angle to make it work.

And while Danielle’s back was going to be smarting later from the friction, she didn’t quite care.

* * *

“It was easier in the shower,” Leonard murmured as he planted kisses across her shoulder blades, a tender brush over the newly-regenerated, rosy flesh.

She laughed softly into her pillow. “You remember that, huh?”

Danielle caught his smirk over her shoulder. “It was a hell of a science experiment. How could I forget?” His lips moved along her spine. “Especially when it was after the night you decided it was worth keeping me around.”

“I decided I wanted you around long before that, sweetheart.” Her fingers curled where they laid at her side to graze over the edge of his knee. “High rate of injury working in weapons, you know. Very useful to have a doctor who’s practically on call.”

Leo intentionally dragged his scruff along her lower back to make her jump. “So that’s how it is? You using me for my MD?”

“And your body,” she added. “Don’t forget that. Really enjoying all the sex.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty great. I suppose I can live with that in return.” He pushed himself back up towards the headboard so that he could lie on his stomach next to her, cheek resting on the pillow and facing her. “Not a bad view in the mornings, either.”

Her fingers found his wrist first, then traversed the rest of the limb to slot their fingers together. “Seeing you, Leo, will always be the best part of my day.”

“I know we were really cautious about it before, but you can always come by the Medbay. I don’t give a fuck if people don’t like it. They can take it up with me personally. In my office. Surrounded by hyposprays.”

“As oddly sweet as that is, I think most of our crewmates are supportive. Everyone’s cards were so lovely.” The corner of her mouth lifted at the memory of Leonard reading her the messages in the hospital when she couldn’t open them herself. “I think the people who won’t be are those who didn’t like us before, or Jim or Uncle Chris. But they don’t really matter.”

“Mm. C’mere.” He unlaced their hands so that he could wrap his arm around her back and drag her closer until they were both on their sides and mere inches apart. “You know, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the things that _do_ matter, the people. Our friends, our family. You.” He pushed a stray pair of locks from her face. “Do you think that Chris would agree to write a statement for the court if I asked?”

The skin between her eyebrows wrinkled. “Are you in trouble?”

He shook his head. “No. At least, no more than usual considering Jim’s presence in our lives.” A snort. “Being in Georgia with Gran got me thinking about how things were really different now,” McCoy explained, “and I got to wondering if maybe, I got myself a lawyer, I could have a chance to see my daughter again. Be a part of her life.”

Danielle carded her fingertips through his mussed dark hair, just over the shell of his ear. “I don’t think he’d even give it a second thought, sweetheart. He recruited you,” she pointed out, “so he has seen what kind of strides you have made since. He’ll do it because of you, not because of me.”

There was a pause where Leonard knew she had more to say, but was uncertain of something. Rather than cajole her, he waited. Let her break the silence in her own time.

“If it’d be helpful to get the Admiral involved, I can do it,” she offered in a voice he couldn’t consider to be much more than a whisper. “Once you find yourself a lawyer, you should ask.”

McCoy’s heart nearly stopped. He knew the gravity of what she was offering him, the sacrifice that she was willing to make: not just contact with a man who had mistreated her and whom she perpetually resented, but to ask of him a _favor_ , knowing he would likely want something in return. And not just anything, something that would likely compromise the integrity she had prided herself on since she had first put on cadet reds and then some.

“Danielle.” He reached for her face so that his thumbs rested on the apples of her cheeks and his remaining fingers cradled her skull. There were no words to describe his gratitude in that moment, let alone his love for her. “ _Darlin’_ , I can’t let you—“

“You and I both know that nobody _lets_ me do anything, not even you.” The humor in her words didn’t even remotely reach her eyes and she inhaled a shuddering breath. “Regardless. Let me do this for you. _Please_.”

Leo didn’t have an answer. When a woman would make that kind of a sacrifice at such personal cost, to her emotional and mental detriment, were there really any adequate ones?

Anything he had to say would come across as a mere platitude, so he just lowered his head the remaining way to bring their foreheads together and let touch and contact speak for him.

_I love you._

_More than words._

_More than worlds._

_I promise._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay in updating. Life at home has been chaotic, to say the least. Reviews are continually appreciated and I do my best to respond to them as soon as possible. :)


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m fine.”
> 
> “Oh yeah?” she challenged. “Okay, then. Tell me anything about the movie we’re watching. Anything about the plot or characters at all.”
> 
> He blinked. “Uh… well, the one guy. I think he was blind?”
> 
> Danielle snorted. “We watched that film last night, Leonard.”

“God damn it!”

Danielle jumped and winced at the kitchen counter, nearly splashing the orange juice across her knuckles mid-pour. She topped off the champagne flute with a generous splash of prosecco for herself and vodka in the tumbler for Leonard.

Upon arriving in the study, she found him sitting in a high-backed chair by the sweeping bay window. It was close enough to his cohorts to be near the action, but far enough to avoid any potential violence.

“I swear, Jim beats him just to rile him up, not because he _actually_ cares about winning.”

Admiral Christopher Pike was fortunate in that he was never short on partners in three-dimensional chess. Admiral Marcus often joined him for a game after particularly frustrated meetings to help calm them, while Spock occasionally dropped by for a cup of tea and what qualified as a catch-up (to a Vulcan, anyway) when they had more than a few days between missions.

Jim was a more constant partner when he was Earthside, though their matches usually took place over several beers or a couple of fingers of whiskey in the very study they were currently taking up residence.

Pike had played Chekov precisely six times while he was recovering in the hospital. As exuberant and bouncy as the young ensign was, it became frustrating as he nonchalantly wiped the floor with his superior five times in a row. Though, Chris knew Pavel let him win the sixth time around and they stuck to just lighthearted conversation thereafter.

“Maybe you should avenge his defeat?” Danielle murmured softly and wrapped her arms around Leonard’s shoulders, bent over the top of the chair back. One hand held her mimosa, the other handed of his screwdriver. “Bring Jim down to Earth a little.”

He snorted. “S’nice you think my skills are up to snuff, but my record against the kid is absolute shit.”

She chuckled lowly and knocked the tip of her nose against his cheek. “Maybe you just didn’t have the right sort of incentive?”

It was his turn to laugh and he turned his attention away from the other men in the room to kiss her. “Well then,” McCoy smiled and subsequently announced, “I’ve got next.”

* * *

 

The chime of the doorbell reverberated through the house, quickly followed by a bellow from the younger Blake sister that she’d get it. Leo halted the game so that he could head to the door to greet the guest, who had to be his grandmother by process of elimination.

Pike had invited his goddaughters, Kirk and McCoy, and Leonard’s gran for a small patchwork family get together in celebration of Danielle’s return to duty. He took great pride in their weird little circle and had seemed easily won over by her stories of Grace McCoy, a recurring topic of conversation during their daily video calls while they were in Georgia.

Whether or not to invite Mrs. McCoy to his home was never a topic he felt the need to debate.

A scream tore through the house and Danielle had unfurled herself to take off like a shot, footsteps pounding on the hardwood. The only one who was not in the study was Samantha, meaning it only could have come from her.

But as she rounded the corner, she stumbled upon the sight of the woman with a short platinum bob that framed her face, bangs swept slightly off to the side and flipped at the ends in a manner that concealed the way her eyes crinkled at the corners from a lifetime of smiling.

“ _Grandma_?!?” She blinked, double-time when the man with a receding widow’s peak and gray hair parted off to the side joined her in the doorway. “ _Grandpa_?!?”

“Surprise!” Their grandmother clapped her hands excitedly as she relinquished the tight hold she had on her younger granddaughter and made a beeline for the elder one. “Oh, look at you!” She embraced her tightly. “I could see over the connection you looked more like yourself, but you look so healthy! Such color in your cheeks…” She tapped the tip of her nose. “And your sun freckles!”

Danielle murmured something and promptly flushed, but this was pointedly ignored by her grandmother.

“Is this him?” Emily questioned in a voice that was quieter and nearly conspiratorial, but not nearly soft enough to go unheard by anyone else.

When Danielle glanced over her shoulder, she noticed that Jim was the first one to have left the study, but due to his calm, suspected that Chris had let him and Leonard know her grandparents had likely arrived.

“If it is,” she continued on without letting the blonde get a word in edgewise, “he’s very handsome, I’ll give you that. A real looker. Reminds me of that 20th century Hollywood actor… you know, the one from the film we saw on that American Film Institute channel the other night…”

Philip’s brows knit together in thought. “From the World War two film with the motorcycle?”

“No, no.” She flicked her hand. “With the outlaws!”

“Oh. Ah…” He wrinkled his nose in a way that made Jim’s lips twitch, having recognized the habit as one passed onto his eldest granddaughter. “Butch Cassidy?”

“No, the other one. Sunshine… something or other?”

“The _Sundance Kid_?” Chris supplied helpfully, the click of his cane on hardwood evidence of his appearance. “Robert Redford?”

Emily snapped her fingers. “That’s the one! That’s who he looks like… Robert Redford!”

“What a movie,” Philip agreed as he shook Pike’s hand. “Good to see you, Chris. Thanks for inviting us over to see the kids off. Nice to see you’re doing well and back on your feet.”

“So yes,” her grandmother pressed on, “he looks like Robert Redford, which is lovely and all, but that boy has quite a bit of mischief in his eyes, Danielle. I can see it clear across the room.”

“Could see it from outer space, too,” Samantha intoned helpfully.

The younger woman groaned and shook her head, vehemently at that. “No, Grandma. That’s _Jim_.”

“Jim _Kirk_?” A grin split her face. “Well, as I live and breathe. Of course I know all about Jim. You ate all the dark meat last Thanksgiving and my eldest grandchild here punched you in the nose on Christmas. Among other things. See, Philip?” She lightly rapped her knuckles against his arm. “I knew he was mischievous. I’m never wrong about these things.”

“Of course, dear.” His pale gray eyes flickered to Chris, adorably exasperated. “Good to meet you, son. Heard mostly good things about you.” He winked at the blond man and extended his hand, grasping Jim’s in a firm shake. “Hope you’ve been staying out of trouble with Danielle out of commission.”

“Of course, sir. I’m not as good of a shot as she is, so best not to tempt fate.”

It was Pike’s turn to roll his eyes.

Despite the several about-faces in the conversation, Danielle was reminded that it had started with her grandmother’s wish to be introduced to her boyfriend as he finally made his way into the hall.

She looked over at McCoy with a radiant smile and took a few steps to meet him, coiling loose fingers around his forearm to steer him towards her grandparents. “Grandma, Grandpa… I’d like to introduce you to Dr. Leonard McCoy.”

Emily’s green eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. “Oh, you’ll do very nicely.”

“Em.” Philip grunted, angling his body away from Jim and Chris to the new entrant. “Excuse my wife. She’s… well, I’ve been married long enough to know not to finish that sentence. Philip Lanier,” he introduced himself with a handshake. “Nice to finally meet you and put a name to the face, Dr. McCoy.”

“Mr. Lanier, it’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Please call me Leonard. Dr. McCoy was my father… and my grandfather… and my great-grandfather.” He smiled disarmingly. “So as you can see, I come from a long line and it can get confusing.”

“Leonard it is, then. And please call me Phil.” He gestured to his right. “And of course, my lovely wife, Emily. Married 47 years just this past October.”

When Emily held out her hand, Leo brought it to his lips and kissed it. “Pleasure to meet you, m’am,” he addressed her warmly, accent especially thick.

“Ah, southern charm. Well _done_ ,” she praised.

“I’d like to take a bit of credit for that.”

All heads craned or swiveled to find Grace McCoy had arrived and was standing a few feet behind the occupied doorway.

McCoy ducked his head, the tips of his ears red. “Hi, Gran.”

“Hello, sweet boy,” Gran drawled. “Am I very late?”

“Not at all, Mrs. McCoy.” Chris offered his free hand to her, palm facing up when Phil moved a little bit to the side to allow her to enter. “Please, come in.”

She took his hand and the round of introductions started all over again, concluding with Chris leading Phil to the study for a drink and some chess and Emily and Grace making their way to the kitchen. The division left Danielle, Jim, Leonard, and Sam all standing around and the sisters exchanged glances.

“We’re in so much trouble,” Samantha sighed at once.

* * *

 

The Laniers didn’t get to see Christopher Pike as much as they would have liked. In the earliest years of Melinda and John’s relationship, he often accompanied John on trips to see her and wound up wandering around the French Quarter and indulging in food and drink, as well as the culture.

His visits became fewer as the couple became more serious to the point where her parents only saw him at celebrations held by the Blakes, but they considered him to be a part of the family all the same.

“Is it safe to assume you’ve given him the ol’ shovel talk?” Phil asked nonchalantly as he moved his rook across the board.

Pike’s gray eyes honed in on the new position of the white piece. “More or less.”

“Either you did or you didn’t.”

“He has a daughter, probably closing in on nine by now. I’d say…” He rubbed his hand over his jaw. “We came to an understanding.”

The elder man took a small swig of his scotch. “And that understanding was?”

Chris was silent for a solid minute, head ducked to evaluate the board. He moved his knight and then spoke again. “That I’m more than capable of disposing of a body without a trace in the comfort of my own basement.”

Phil cocked his eyebrow and head simultaneously, then dipped his chin. “Good enough for me.”

* * *

 

Whatever lunch Chris and the girls had planned on was promptly thrown out of the window once Emily and Grace took over the kitchen. From their first conversation that went beyond mere pleasantries, the grandmothers got on like a house on fire and the notion was enough to instill a sense of fear in the younger generation.

Jim seemed to be the least afraid, to no one’s surprise, as he was always good for charming women of all ages. It wasn’t long before both were referring to him as “Jim, dear” and he was their de facto assistant in the kitchen.

Leo, on the other hand, seemed to be alternating between concern over having enough room for Jesus between them on the couch and what they were discussing in the other room, craning his neck every few minutes to peek inside. Though, what he expected to discover, she didn’t quite know.

Exasperated, she practically bounced across the sofa and tugged his arm around her shoulders. “Leo, sweetheart. You’re _freaking out_.”

“I’m _fine_.”

“Oh yeah?” she challenged. “Okay, then. Tell me anything about the movie we’re watching. Anything about the plot or characters at all.”

He blinked. “Uh… well, the one guy. I think he was blind?”

Danielle snorted. “We watched that film last night, Leonard.”

“Okay,” he conceded with raised hands. “Fine. I’m a little… disconcerted. Gran is as sharp as a tack and your grandmother had Jim pegged the moment she laid eyes on him. The two of them together is fucking _scary_.”

Of course, that was the perfect moment for Jim to walk into the room, hair slightly dusted with a thin sheen of flour.

“Relax, Bones.” He clapped his friend on the shoulder. “I’m sure all their talk about how beautiful your babies will be is entirely in jest.”

McCoy choked on a breath. “Fuck—me.”

“Yes, that is a way to accelerate the possibility.”

“Jim,” Danielle snapped, green eyes dark. “Do _not_ encourage them.”

“Oh, I’ve already done my part. They asked me whether you should hyphenate your last name and I said that you would have to, at least professionally, because two Dr. McCoys on the ship could get very confusing.”

The doctor exhaled heavily through his nostrils in a manner reminiscent of a bull, completely silent aside from his breathing. His girlfriend watched as his face progressed through a gradient of colors that ultimately seemed to settle somewhere in the range of red and the vein near his temple was throbbing.

Danielle instantly knew she needed to intervene. _Fast_. “Come on, sweetheart. Let’s go take a walk and get some fresh air. It’s pretty mild out today.” His eyes remained fixated on Jim. “Leo? Knock, knock?”

She tapped two fingers to his jaw to emphasize the words, but it was only when her soft laughter drifted across his ears and took up residence in his brain that he actually managed to shift his focus. There was a noticeable slump in his shoulders, too.

“M’here,” he murmured, grumpy. “Sam, you mind telling them where we went if they ask? Right now, I think it’s either I leave of my own volition or in the back of a goddamn police car.”

“Gotcha covered, Doc.” Samantha saluted. “Go forth and stroll. Take your jackets, even if you don’t use them. I do _not_ want to hear it from the grandmas. Let it be an illusion.”

“Thanks, kid.” He flashed her a miserable smile, but it was still nice all the same.

* * *

 

They walked for a long while in relative silence, Leonard acquiescing to every turn and change of direction. Though it had been years since she’d played in these streets with the neighborhood children, she still remembered how to get around. He, on the other hand, would have just wandered aimlessly.

He was grateful for the leather jacket Pike had gifted him on Christmas. It was perfect for the weather in the middle fifties with air just cool enough to wheedle its way under a jacket and nip even at unexposed flesh, but not enough to radiate through the layer of thick fabric and the black scoop neck shirt that laid beneath it.

Despite being the Bay Area native, she seemed to be a little less suited for any temperature under sixty degrees and wore a chic tan pea coat that was cinched at the waist by a belt over the series of buttons, as well as a cream colored linen scarf. Though, her hands weren’t gloved, only at rest in her pockets.

“Sometimes—“ Leonard swallowed thickly, Adam’s apple bobbing under the strain. “I worry that I’m not giving you everything you need,” he confessed in an uncertain voice. “As a partner.”

Danielle’s heart picked up in her chest and she quickly grew nervous. “Why would you think something like that?”

“After K’toa, I realized how long you’ve been taking care of me,” he reasoned. “Even when we were strictly platonic.” He sighed and rubbed at the back of his neck. “These last six weeks or so have paled in comparison and made me realize that you’re always the reliable one. I haven’t been very fair to you, Danielle.”

“I rely on you for a lot of things, Leo,” she countered, but didn’t look over at him out of fear she might see something in his eyes that could never be taken back or forgotten. “I became self-sufficient by necessity when I was just a kid, but I couldn’t handle my own emotional wellbeing. That’s what I’ve always needed more than anything.”

“I don’t want you to wake up one day and realized you wasted the best years of your life on me.”

“They’re the best years precisely because you’re such a big part of them.” This time, the temptation was too great and she stopped, forcing him to do the same so he didn’t get ahead of her. “I’ve been in love with you for _years_ , Leo. After we slept together on Halloween, I thought that keeping it going was the only way I’d get to have you, which was stupid and naïve, but I didn’t care. I wanted to be your girl, even if it was just for a night or even a few hours.” She caught him by the hem of his sleeve. “Did you have feelings for me before that?”

“Yes,” he admitted without hesitation, “but I think they were buried so far beneath a few stories’ worth of self-loathing that I couldn’t recognize it at the time.”

She tugged him towards the break in the grass along the curb at the street corner, where concrete broke across the plane of green to create a crosswalk. When she sat down on the hard surface, she looked up at him expectantly.

Leonard knew he was a fool about a lot of things, but he wasn’t dumb. He sat.

“Are you unhappy?” She braced herself for the answer.

He warred with himself whether he should be completely honest, afraid she might take it the wrong way. So he selected his words carefully and then spoke at last, “Sometimes. But not because of you.”

“ _With_ me, then?”

“Not with our relationship, but I can’t say I’m never unhappy in your presence because we live and work together,” he said. “So sometimes, those moments just overlap because we’re around each other so much. If that makes sense.”

She shook her head, voice hoarse, “It doesn’t to me right now.”

He cursed under his breath. “Rarely do five minutes go by where I don’t think of Joanna. Some days, it’s easier than others because I’m making mental notes to include a recent event in my upcoming message or it reminds me of something from when she was a baby. But then other times,” he elaborated, “it just hangs over me like a gray crowd and all I can think about is how much I miss her and don’t even know if she knows who I am, anymore. Inevitably on those really bad days, I start thinking about my folks and my grandfather. It’s usually a really dark time for me.

“You make me happy, but I am a moody son of a bitch some days and I can’t shake it, no matter what I do.” He blew out a hard breath. “I’m a fucking asshole, right? Give your grandmother a couple of hours of bein’ with me, and she’ll see it, too.”

Danielle’s head swiveled and she studied him through narrowed green eyes. “So that’s what you’re worried about? My grandparents?”

“No!” A beat. “Yes? Maybe? _God damn it_.”

“ _Leonard_.”

“It doesn’t matter. She’s going to realize you made a mistake in hitching your wagon to mine. M’too old, too beaten down. My good years belong to someone else in another life. The only thing I’ve remotely got goin’ for me Is I ain’t dirt poor anymore, so there’s that.”

“You get _real_ southern when you’re upset, you know that?”

“You’re really gonna make fun of me right now?”

She threw her hands up and let them fall back into her lap. “What the fuck else am I supposed to do, Leo? Say, ‘yeah, okay. You’re right… let’s just end this now’? After everything?” She yanked at her scarf, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. “We were always friends first who cared about each other and knowing what we do now, at some point, with massive crushes on each other. Why we thought casually fooling around would be the answer to our pining, I don’t know, but at least we got our heads out of our asses one way or another. But we _love each other_. We make each other _happy_. At least, I know that’s how I feel. I don’t think I can speak for you right now.”

McCoy draped his arms across his knees, forearms balanced on the patellas. “Loving you comes easier to me than breathing, Darlin’. I just—I don’t know if I can give you everything you deserve. God damn, do I want to try to, but you deserve a hell of a lot more than someone who’s just gonna try.”

“Leo.” She paused to sigh and shake her head. “If everything stayed exactly the way it is for us right now, exactly status quo, that’d be more than enough for me.”

“Are you—“

“ _No_. You’re not listening to me.” She scooted and her jeans caught in spots on the concrete as she angled her body towards him. Then she tucked her body to stay warm. “I like our jobs and our quarters on the ship, but I like the apartment, too. Someday, we’re gonna be too old to keep traipsing around the galaxy and it won’t be a bad place to call home 365 days a year. Close to the Academy, HQ, and the hospital, so if we took ground postings in any of those places, it’s a quick and easy commute. Still enough room for guests with the extra bedroom and the pull out, which we’ll hopefully put to more use if that extra room someday becomes Jo’s. We don’t worry too much about money, we get to have breakfast and dinner together nearly every day, and your face is the first thing I see in the morning, last thing I see at night. You make me smile, make me laugh, know how to put me at ease even when I’m at my worst.

“I don’t need a house or a ring or even a piece of paper to know that the only way out of this relationship for me is in a body bag. Which probably sounds fucking _awful_ , especially in light of recent events, but it’s true.”

The only noise for a long while was the steady alternations of their breathing and a dog barking somewhere a block or two away.

Leonard wasn’t normally short on words, but he found his mouth to be dry given her declaration. It was as close to a vow of ‘til death do us part’ as she could come without standing at an actual altar.

“We should talk about it one day.” His throat tightened, nerves suddenly bubbling up from nowhere. “The future,” he supplemented. “I don’t have an answer right now. Haven’t thought about it much, honestly.”

“No?”

Leo shook his head. “Since I started at the Academy, I’ve been married to Starfleet. It’s really been my only source of stability in years. I like the ship and my crewmates, even if they’re foolhardy idiots. But big picture stuff?” He scoffed at the notion. “I didn’t think there was anything for me anymore but my work.”

The dog started up its barking again.

“I also always wanted a dog, in case you were wondering,” she added nonchalantly, which she realized was somewhat strange given the current tension. But someone had to do something to break it and if it wasn’t going to be him? Well, that left her with one option. “I hope that isn’t a dealbreaker.”

Her musing chipped a little more at the ice that had formed between them in the past hour, cracking a fissure straight through. Danielle swore she could see his lips quirk in the faintest hint of a smile, which was as much as he’d done since she’d passed him liquor earlier and insinuated he’d enjoy some pretty fantastic spoils if he defeated Jim in chess.

It was, at the very least, a solid start to a thaw.

McCoy subsequently shrugged. “I like dogs more than I like most people.”

“… that’s not particularly surprising.”

“ _Nice_.” He lowered his shoulder and used it to nudge her, body swaying like a willow in the breeze. “Look, I may not have an idea of what I want my future to look like, but I know you might have some for yours. I don’t mind hearing about it.”

The concrete was abrasive against her exposed palms as she pushed herself off the ground. Despite the discomfort, she extended a hand towards him. “It can wait until you know, too. Gets kind of boring when you talk about yourself that much.” Once he grasped it, she tugged with a grunt, oblivious to how he’d mostly pushed himself up with his other hand and feet. “And besides… _body bag_ , remember?”

Leonard dusted off his coat and jeans. “Hell of a metaphor,” he acknowledged with an amused tip of his head.

She bit the inside of his cheek, the temptation to reply too much to resist. “You would know.”

* * *

 

“Leonard, dear, you’re just in time!” Gran declared excitedly, using a paper towel to dry off her hands. Though, traces of flour were still present on her forearms. “The biscuit dough is just about ready and I’ve got a can waiting for you right here.” She tapped her fingers atop the upside down container to emphasize her point.

Though McCoy had just walked in with Danielle a few moments prior, he remained a few paces beyond the doorway in his leather jacket and her hand firmly ensconced in his.

Emily took one look at them and smiled around a sip of sweet tea from a large glass. “Your grandmother has been telling me all about how you were always her star student in the kitchen.”

“She used to let me lick the bowl.” He ducked his head a bit shyly. “It was really good incentive.”

“I used to make batches of sugar cookie dough a couple of days before the grandkids were due to arrive so that we could just roll it out and cut shapes at our leisure, rather than worry about first making the dough. Except _someone_ who shall remain nameless used to sneak finger scoops of it when I wasn’t looking, so at least _you_ earned your treats.”

“Grandmaaaaa,” Danielle bemoaned, turning into Leo’s side.

He gamely wrapped his arm around her, but couldn’t help his amusement from shining through on his face. “Mrs. Lanier—“

“Emily.”

“ _Emily_ ,” he corrected himself, “I can tell clear as day where she learned her cooking prowess from. She once made me Toad in a Hole for breakfast, but with hearts cut out from pieces of bread. She even fried the eggs inside the cookie cutters so they’d fit perfectly inside. I just _had_ to make sure she was spoken for after that.”

“I think she was spoken for quite a while before that, but the two of you were being intentionally ignorant,” Emily chortled.

Grace smacked the counter emphatically. “That’s what I said, _too_!  Absolute fools, these two.”

“I’ve been saying all along that they’re really working on year 2, _not_ year 1, but _you_ try arguing with a scientist, Grace.” Emily looked skyward. “My God.”

“Doctors are no better,” her counterpart sighed, “and I would know. I married one and gave birth to one, who then raised another. If my Joanna doesn’t become one, then I’m sorry to say, Emily, you’re inevitably going to be a great-grandmother to one because it’s in the McCoy blood and it doesn’t skip a generation. The McCoy line of doctors goes back centuries.”

Aghast, Danielle’s eyes darted to Leonard in alarm. He seemed to be taking it a little more in stride than she was, but only barely.

“Wouldn’t be the worst thing. I suppose, Phil and I technically already have one in the family with Danielle having her PhD. Not a MD, but we can fix that in the long run with the next generation. I’m not terribly concerned.”

Leo cleared his throat, unable to find any other manner of derailing the current train of conversation. “Uh, you know that we’re both standing two feet away from you both, right?”

“Of course, Leonard, dear.” Gran patted him affectionately on the chest and offered up the empty can in her outstretched palm. “And _not_ making biscuits, at that, which we both know won’t make themselves. So get a move on, won’t you?”

His shoulders slumped and he slunk off to start flouring the counter, mumbling under his breath, “Unbelievable.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates in only two weeks? WHAT IS LIFE?!?
> 
> I’ve actually had most of this chapter written for the better part of a week, however, there were a few key scenes that I rewrote several times. The scene with McCake on the curb and the end scene with the grandmothers were the ones I found particularly challenging. Also, because I accidentally angst-ed as I tend to do.
> 
> As a reminder, I generally write Bones’ Gran with Rosemary Harris (Aunt May from the original Spiderman trilogy) in mind. However, since I know that I’ll get questions about the inspirations for Danielle’s grandparents (and I know that it actually helps me picture characters better myself when I’m the reader), I think of Emily as Helen Mirren and Philip as William Devane.
> 
> I’ll post the full list of face casts on my Tumblr (Heelsheadandstandardshigh) with pictures for you guys to reference.
> 
> Anyway, I do want to thank you all for your well wishes. Dakota is hanging in there and Dad seems to be experiencing relatively smooth treatments, all things considered. Your kindness is so immensely appreciated.
> 
> And now, I think… onto STID!
> 
> Xoxo Elle


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I got myself a real smart woman, but I hope she’ll excuse me if I don’t have the energy to eat and carry on conversation. I’m runnin’ on the last of my brain cells here.”
> 
> “It’s alright. I’m happy to just be with you and not watch you cliff dive anymore.”
> 
> He grumbled around a mouthful of lo mein, “Makes two of us.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dont forget! I have a [Tumblr ](http://heelsheadandstandardshigh.tumblr.com) dedicated just to my writing now and you can check out sneak peeks, status updates, and deleted scenes over there.

Leonard labored down the corridors of the Enterprise with heavy limbs that seemed to squeak with every step. Realistically though, that was due in part to the material of the wetsuit. He had been unable to change out of his field gear since his return to facilitate an immediate exam for Spock, who’d been banged up from his abrupt descent into the volcano that was cushioned by some jagged rocks. The post-mission physical had been about as frustrating as expected.

Uhura, Sulu, and finally (with prodding and harassment), Kirk, had come through the doors of the Medbay for their own workups in light of the contact with a foreign ocean in combination with other substances in the form of volcanic ash or native flora and fauna.

McCoy figured once the king of allergies checked out as being in fine shape despite such contact, he was probably alright, too.

He eventually dragged himself up to his door, where even getting his hand up to the scanner felt like a struggle. Truthfully, he could have faceplanted onto the floor in the entryway and slept just fine for the rest of the night. _That_ was his level of weariness.

“When I said that you’d follow Jim over a cliff, those weren’t meant to be instructions, you know.”

His gaze sharpened enough to overcome his exhaustion and spot his girlfriend perched on the couch with a stack of containers and a short heap of clothes in front of her. He faintly registered the sound of the metal panel whooshing shut behind him.

“For the record, _I_ wanted to head towards the beach,” he complained, leaning his shoulder against the wall.

The corner of Danielle’s mouth twitched. “I suspected it wasn’t your idea.”

“That would explain why you haven’t cuffed me upside the head yet.”

“You had a rough day,” the blonde conceded with a sympathetic nod, having already left the couch to meet him where he stood.

Upon closer inspection, Blake noted that his eyes were just the faintest hint of bloodshot at the very corners, tendrils of red creeping across the whites, rimmed in purple. The lids were slightly droopy now that the adrenaline and caffeine had both worn off.

Her hand cradled one of his cheeks. “Take a shower. I’ll warm up the food I brought and then you have a very important date with your bed. We’re heading back to Earth now,” she informed him. “Jim took everyone involved in the mission off rotation for tomorrow and put M’Benga on shift lead in Medbay.”

He growled, eyes already darting to where her communicator was resting on the sofa, but she interceded.

“Leonard.” She stepped into his line of vision, startling him a fraction. “You’re _done_.”

He stared at her as though he was considering an argument, but visibly slumped in defeat. Leo eventually nodded to demonstrate his acquiescence, leaning into her. “Alright,” he relented. “You’re the boss.”

She chuckled warmly. “Wow. I wish I had asked the computer to record that. Ah, well…”

Danielle slipped behind him to grip his shoulders and start maneuvering him towards the bathroom. She twisted Leonard just enough to get them both through the doorway, kicking the door shut behind him so that she could trap in the heat of the shower.

With him propped up against the vanity counter, she turned the water on. Considering he was so weary, a sonic shower just simply wouldn’t do. It was worth eating into the water ration that he hadn’t tapped into yet on this trip.

“I don’t want to see you jumping off cliffs any time soon again, but—“ She brushed her lips over the exposed stem of his neck. “Don’t misplace this, alright?” Danielle grinned at him in their refection in the mirror.

He chuckled warmly, laced with a little sleepiness that made his head droop. “You got one of these stashed away somewhere, too?”

“As a matter of fact, I do.” Leonard’s hazel eyes snapped up and she smirked at him. “It’s science blue, so a little darker.“ Her fingers smoothed across the breadth of his back to start to unzip the suit. “Maybe I’ll just have to break it out for a special occasion…”

“M’gettin’ old, darlin’,” McCoy drawled, gripping the counter. “Body’s not cooperating with me quite as much as it used to. Feel like a bag of skin and bones and organs, not so much a person. Not sure I’m much up to peeling you out of one of these.”

“You would be the first to tell me it’s the adrenaline wearing off. You’re thirty-two, not sixty.”

He scoffed. “Says the spry twenty-seven year old.”

“Says the doctor who jumped off a cliff and then conducted four physicals without so much as taking a moment to sit down.” Her hands pried the stretchy fabric from his shoulders. “A shower, a meal, and a good night’s sleep and you’ll feel like a brand new person.”

“Don’t need to feel like a brand new person. Just me about eighteen hours ago,” he complained, accent even thicker than usual due to fatigue. “Preferably before all the running.”

Laughter bubbled up from her throat and echoed around the confines of the small room. “Duly noted. Lean back from the sink a little,” she remarked, having stripped the neoprene-like material down to his waist and now requiring the space to work it down his legs.

Leonard did as requested, but dipped his chin to either watch her or merely look at her, she couldn’t entirely tell. “I can manage to undress myself, you know.”

Her lips twitched. “Oh, I’m well aware. I’ve watched you many, _many_ times and thoroughly enjoyed myself each one.” The thighs were a little trickier without a zipper to relax the fabric, but she was careful not to scratch him when she hooked her fingers into the inner lining to maneuver the suit down while she crouched on the linoleum. “The thing is though, you don’t have to tonight. I’m here.” She lifted her gaze just enough to lock onto his, directly and not via the mirror this time. “Okay?”

All of his bluster dissipated in that instant. McCoy understood that this was their partnership at its core. “Okay,” he managed in a deep exhale. “Thanks, darlin’.”

She tapped one calf to signal to him that he needed to lift his leg so she could remove the suit from his body once and for all, then repeated the motion with the other. The wetsuit landed in the corner with a hollow plop. “You’re welcome.” Her fingertips grazed the length of his leg while she righted herself, the gesture more affectionate than sexual. “Go on in and take as long as you like. You’ve earned a long shower. Tap my rations if you need to.”

He ducked his head to kiss her, his limbs heavy. “I won’t, but I appreciate the offer.”

“Still stands,” she murmured and leaned back to stroke his cheek. “ _Go_. I’ll get dinner warmed up for you, but no rush.”

When it was clear to him that she was not going to move until he was inside, Leo slid the door aside to step under the steamy spray. The groan he let out the moment the hot water connected with his weary body was positively indecent, but Danielle didn’t let it give her any ideas. She merely grinned upon her departure.

\--

Dinner wasn’t anything particularly special. The containers housed white rice, beef and broccoli, some vegetable lo mein, and a pair of spring rolls that would have felt more authentic if they came in those little white and red boxes that they’d been served in for nearly three centuries.

Alas, while the replicator was capable of making the food, it was not capable of producing the appropriate containers. Then again, maybe it would be more satisfying to eat a meal off of actual plates than our of a carton.

By Danielle’s casual watch of the clock on her PADD, Leonard had been in the shower for nearly thirty minutes. On any other day, this would have worried her to the point of knocking, but on this one, she might have been more concerned if his turn had been brief.

He was drained, physically and emotionally. Flying through space in a highly-regulated, highly-serviced constitution-class starship was one thing. Jumping off of a cliff was another.

Somewhere around the thirty-five minute mark, the splatter of water against tile ceased and shortly thereafter, her boyfriend padded out into the main living space in the pair of sweats she’d slipped back into the bathroom to leave for him.

His smile was a bit droopy at the edges, but it was still there. “Smells good.”

“Chinese,” she answered simply and waved him over to the couch. “Sit, I left it on the warm setting so it’s ready for you. You hungry?”

“Starving. Stomach’s been reminding me I haven’t had anything since the coffee and toast I had at breakfast…” He checked the computer clock on the wall, which read 20:32. “At six-thirty. _Jesus.”_

The plate clinked atop the glass, followed in short order by a set of utensils and a glass of bright red sports drink. “Electrolytes.”

His muscles ached as he lowered onto the couch opposite the filled dish, but he did his best not to make any noise. However, he couldn’t contain his grimace. “You been consultin’ Geoff?”

She shook her head. “You’ve taken care of me after enough missions for some of it to stick.”

“I got myself a real smart woman, but I hope she’ll excuse me if I don’t have the energy to eat and carry on conversation. I’m runnin’ on the last of my brain cells here.”

“It’s alright. I’m happy to just be with you and not watch you cliff dive anymore.”

He grumbled around a mouthful of lo mein, “Makes two of us.”

* * *

Nothing remained of Leonard’s first serving, nor his second, and only a bite of a spring roll was leftover by the time his stomach caught up with his hunger. She popped the remaining chunk into her mouth and carted his dishes off to the sink.

“Danielle, you don’t—“

“I’m going to ignore any protests because I know you’re going to ultimately accept defeat, whether you like it or not,” she told the doctor rather simply, effectively cutting off any argument. “Go on into bed, sweetheart. This’ll only take a minute or two.”

He paused as though he were raring up for further debate, but a yawn ruined his store of counterarguments and he relented. “You gonna join me?”

She flicked a damp hand downward, drawing his attention to her body that was clad in a pair of lounge pants and a San Francisco Giants tanktop. Not that he needed the extra direction, anyway. “Certainly not dressed for battle, McCoy.”

The fact that she could take care of him, but still maintain the repartee that defined their relationship, made him love her even more.

Leonard labored across the room to kiss the top of her head in gratitude and made his way to bed.

He couldn’t help but laugh when he found the blanket on his side of the bed pulled back, pillows stacked just the way he liked. He also noticed a small, dark blue bottle on his nightstand next to a glass of water, but didn’t pay it too much mind. It wasn’t exactly like he was worried about her poisoning him, though the thought might have dawned on him if it were six years earlier and he was in the midst of the sharp decline of his marriage.

And when had he found his way under the covers, anyway?

The bed dipped not long after and was followed by long, slender fingers running through his hair. “Hi,” the accompanying voice whispered.

“Hey,” he rasped back, turning his head to try and catch a glimpse of her over his shoulder. He was pleased to discover he was able to perceive her smile in his peripheral. “That was fast.”

“You didn’t exactly leave much on your plate to clean off.” He felt his body list to the side a fraction as she shifted more weight onto the mattress. “How do you feel?” Danielle inquired, now hovering at some location that he couldn’t find no matter how much he twisted.

“Tired. Creaky. _Sore_.” He sighed. “To sum it up? Like _shit_.”

“Ah, now there’s the man I fell in love with.” The level of affection on the words surprised him. It should have sounded like a sarcastic complaint, but it wasn’t. “Need you to tell me if what I’m about to do is uncomfortable, alright?”

“Jesus, that certainly bodes well.”

Her knees pressed in on either side of him until she was straddling the backs of his thighs. The addition of her weight surprised him, but Leonard didn’t find it particularly uncomfortable. It required a little adjustment, but not much else.

“Close your eyes for me?” she asked, though it really was meant to serve as instructions rather than a question.

He was too wiped out to resist and obliged, only registering the click of a cap opening and a squishing noise. Once a pair of warm hands glided from the base of his spine to where it met his neck, he realized the dark blue liquid had been massage oil.

Leonard moaned in delight. “You know there’s an old joke about this.”

Danielle lavished his back in broad, gentle strokes to start with. “About what?”

“’Bout someone’s ideal weight.” Her thumbs pushed up the ridges of his spinal column. “My goal weight is my weight plus the weight of a beautiful woman on top of me.”

The lascivious smirk he flashed her did all sorts of things to her that she couldn’t annunciate. “ _No_ ,” she snickered with a shake of her head. “Ask me again in the morning and we’ll see how you feel.”

“I’m sure I’ll feel _up_ to the—“ The heels of her palms dug into a shoulder blade and he arched. “Good God, woman.”

“Stop flirting and start relaxing. No need to continue to hit on your massage therapist. You’re already sleeping with her.”

Whereas his hands had been laying limply by his sides previously, his hand curled enough to brush his fingertips over her kneecaps beneath the cotton. “I’m in love with her, though.” His voice was heavily accented and fond. “Think her boss’ll be mad if I convince her to run away with me?”

“I think her boss will manage to track down some six-armed therapist who will make him a bucket load more in credits than she ever could.”

McCoy snorted. “Jim would, wouldn’t he?”

“Absolutely.”

The pressure of her hands remained firm, but never more than he could handle. He knew he needed to be beaten up on her ‘table’ after years of tension without this kind of attention to his muscles. In fact, he’d thought about the pity he had for the masseuse who drew the short straw one day when he actually got himself to a make an appointment. Not that he had any time in his life or the foreseeable future, but it was a nice thought.

Still, he supposed he would never be as capable of relaxing under the touch of anyone aside from Danielle. He’d be fine at an appointment, but his body had such inherent trust in her that it was second-nature to submit to the will of her hands and let her do as she pleased. Though the initial dig of her thumb into her heel made him hsis, his entire being was thrumming from the release of tension.

Time passed without Leonard noticing. His whole body felt warm and buzzy, and though she’d moved onto new parts long ago, he felt the echo of her hands everywhere.

There was a soft rustle next to him and the mattress sprung back from where it had been depressed beneath her.

“Leo…” She drew the plush cotton over the divot in his lower back. “Hey, sweetheart, how do you feel?”

“Hmm?” He cracked a sleepy eye open. “Oh.  Like I wanna runaway with you to Risa and spend the rest of my life on a beach with you. Or in bed. Actually, both. Let’s go with both.”

She laughed and toweled off her hands for good measure. “I think that’s McCoy speak for good, so I’d say you’re ready for bed.”

Danielle left the towel on the nightstand to be dealt with tomorrow and joined him under the blanket. However, before Leonard could roll to face her, she had laid on her side so her chest was to his back, bodies melded together from shoulder to knee.

“Never been the little spoon before,” he murmured drowsily. “S’kind of nice.”

“Mmm.” One of her arms was wrapped around his middle, while the other was perched in such a manner that she could card her fingers through his hair. “You take care of so many people, Leo. Everyone on this ship, really. Every now and then, it’s okay for someone else to take care of _you_.”

Even in his drowsy haze, he had a sudden flashback to a time where a woman in a satin bunny costume had told him the same thing, hovering over him in his office chair with the door closed. He’d had quite a view then: perfectly curled blonde hair, long, dark lashes, ample cleavage, and legs for days.

But this— fully clothed and dead-tired, with bags under his eyes and a body suffering from sudden adrenaline drop—was _so_ much better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, hello everyone! Sorry for the delay in writing this. Been struggling with how to bridge the gap into the second film and some stuff in my personal life.
> 
> I've been calling this an interlude rather than a full fledged chapter and there is rationale behind it. These scenes don't really move the plot along in terms of overall conflict or plot development, but it does put us firmly within the timeline of Star Trek Into Darkness now. I wanted the interlude to be something of substance that would occur within the bounds of the film, but wasn't limited to the confines of the script.
> 
> At any rate, I hope you like this chapter. There have been times that I absolutely loathe what I've written, but this is the first time in a while that I was happy on first read through and only made minor revisions here and there. Hence, I'm REALLY excited for you to read and review this one. Your feedback is always immensely appreciated.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What would you even do if you retired, huh?” She snorted. “You’d feel incomplete if you didn’t have at least one patient to hassle every day.”
> 
> “Easy. I’d teach,” he returned simply, as if a) it wasn’t even worthy of a second thought and b) his body weight wasn’t pinning her to the bed. “Then I’d get to hassle a whole classroom full of idiots.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the longish wait for this next chapter. My grandmother had heart surgery, my father began cancer treatments, and my beloved chocolate lab passed away after a battle with osteosarcoma in the course of 10 days. It has been hellish, but I am here and appreciate all of your support.
> 
> To say that it is about to go down towards the end of this chapter is quite an understatement.

“They give us that damn five year mission and I’m hanging up my boots.”

Danielle groaned as she kicked off her sandals in the general direction of her closet to join the jacket she’d chucked there a minute earlier, not even bothering to face it to confirm it landed. “ _Leo_.”

“ _What_?” He looked up from where he’d dropped one black sneaker near the foot of the bed, brow arched.

She poked him in the thigh with her bare toes. “We were five minutes away from being naked. Maybe, ten tops. And you thought it was a good idea to _complain_ _about work_?”

Leonard stopped dead in his tracks, looking remorseful as he removed his remaining shoe. “I, um… I can see where perhaps, that was a poor decision.”

“Mhmm.” She tugged off her sweater in a smooth motion, leaving her standing a foot away in a black bra. “You think?”

He nodded eagerly, pupils dilating. “Yes. It was unbelievably stupid.”

His reaction left her grinning. “C’mere, Doctor,” Danielle beckoned with a crooked finger.

It took Leonard all of five seconds to shift gears and grasp her hips. His hold on her was firm enough that she felt the press of it, but not enough to leave bruises behind“Yes, Lieutenant Commander.”

“ _Oh_.” She blinked, the corners of her mouth lifting. “Oh, that’s new.”

McCoy hummed, low in his throat. He’d been hoping to garner a reaction from her, though he didn’t know what kind he was hoping for. “You like that, huh?”

“…Mayyyyyybe.”

Leonard laughed and sunk lower so that he could wrap his arms around her thighs and hoist her into the air. He swiftly closed the distance to the bed then gently dropped her into the center, whereupon she bounced a few times and promptly erupted into giggles.

“Leo!” She grasped his shirt as he hovered over her, grinning wildly. “If this is what’s going to happen every time I take you to the farmer’s market, I’m going to block out my Sundays from here-on out.”

“This has nothing to do with produce and pies and everything to do with those jeans you’re wearing. I can’t remember the last time we actually got to wear any clothing that wasn’t regulation and I’d nearly forgotten how much I love seeing you in them.” He lowered a little so his forearms were bracketed on either side of her head. “That’d be one upside to retiring.”

“What would you even _do_ if you retired, huh?” She snorted. “You’d feel incomplete if you didn’t have at least one patient to hassle every day.”

“Easy. I’d teach,” he returned simply, as if a) it wasn’t even worthy of a second thought and b) his body weight wasn’t pinning her to the bed. “Then I’d get to hassle a whole _classroom_ full of idiots.”

“Oh, you would, would you? Well, that’s _definitely_ something you should mention in a job interview.”

“Admiral Barnett already told me that when I’m done in space, he’s got a spot waiting for me.” Leonard ducked his head to kiss her, lips slow-moving. “Just think,” he murmured, “we could have rendezvous in utility closets between classes. Or our offices. I’m not picky.”

Danielle’s brain finally caught up the rest of her body and she turned her head to the side to temporarily break apart. Her boyfriend took that as an invitation for his mouth to latch onto her neck. “I-“ She moaned. “I’d be coming with you then, huh?”

“Mm.” He nipped his way up her jaw until he was able to tug on her earlobe with his teeth. “Wasn’t goin’ back up there before without you. Won’t come back down without you, either.”

With all her strength, Danielle shoved him off her so that she could roll across the small gap between them, winding up with her thighs on either side of his and her palms splayed across his chest. “You old softie.”

Leonard fixed her with a look. “You know, we were five minutes away from being naked,” he parroted back to her. “And you thought it was a good idea to call me _old_?”

Laughter sprung from her throat and then it was her turn to lead, kissing him soundly where he was sprawled underneath her. Leonard’s hands roamed along her shapely form, particularly interested where bare skin was exposed for all his talk of denim.

She managed to tug his shirt free from where it was stuck between him and the blankets, and then ultimately chucked it in the general direction of where some of her own clothes laid strewn on the hardwood. Then her touch started to wander, too.

Danielle was in the process of working a pretty spectacular hickey over his collar bone when a chirping noise cut through the mostly-silent room.

She groaned and tipped sideways enough to see the caller’s name flash on the screen of Leonard’s communicator.

“It’s Jim,” she declared, resuming her earlier task that drew a pleasurable hiss from McCoy. “Probably wants to share the good news about the mission. Get you to keep your boots in your closet.”

Kirk had, after all, triggered Leonard’s rant about the possibility of the Enterprise embarking on the five-year mission with an earlier message indicating he’d been called to HQ. He had spent an impressive amount of time hypothesizing about the subject of the meeting, largely concluding they were going to offer him the mission and tell him to start bulking up on crew. In fact, it had lasted the length of the time they’d spent at the market, including the journey there and mostly back.

The doctor reached for the nightstand, only to encounter a hand locked around his wrist to secure it to the mattress. “ _Are you kidding me_?” she growled, teeth sinking in. “You are _not_ answering that right now.”

But the chirping persisted endlessly and McCoy found his gaze continually wandering to its source.

“Darlin’…” He flexed his fingers.

“ _Leo_.” Her grasp tightened, though it was ultimately not enough to hold him there.

Leonard pulled his arm free and wiggled out from under her to take the call. He didn’t dare look back at his peeved girlfriend, whom he could feel burning holes into his skull with her eyes.

“Jim,” he greeted his friend gruffly. “You better be dyin’, or so help me God, I might never get laid aga—hold on there a minute.” Leo’s entire body straightened. “Just slow down and repeat yourself.”

Much of Danielle’s anger rapidly dissipated and was immediately replaced with concern. She could read her boyfriend like a book, so it was clear to her that something Jim had said hadn’t just surprised him, but actually _worried_ him.

“Where are you?” Leonard pressed the captain, clutching the comm a little tighter to his ear. She noted his knuckles had gone white. “Listen to me, Jim. Go home and wait for me there. I’ll be over in thirty minutes.” He paused to listen to the hurried, anguished reply. “Yeah, I’m with her right now. We’ll figure this out, Jim. Okay? Just don’t do anything stupid until I get there.” Another stilted reply and the communication ended.

“… what happened?” Danielle inquired hesitantly, sucking in a deep breath. “ _Leonard_?”

But he remained perched at the edge of the bed, legs over the side with his soles resting on the wood floor. “They took the ship from him,” he responded, disbelief coloring his words. “You were there when Jim made his log of the Nibiru mission. Remember how much he omitted? _Well_.” He ground his teeth together, jaw clenched. “That green-blooded hobgoblin _didn’t_. Your godfather just broke the news to him.”

Danielle inhaled sharply, almost dizzily. How could they take the ship from Jim when he’d saved so many lives on Earth, let alone elsewhere? She knew he couldn’t trade on it forever, but what he’d done this time, he’d done for his First Officer’s safety, even if he’d interfered with a less-advanced lifeform. “I could kill him.”

Leonard slipped from the bed to retrieve his shirt, the once-charged air now rife with a sense of grief. “That makes two of us. And don’t think I don’t know how to make it look like an accident.”

She took the tiniest bit of solace in that. “I’m going to make a couple of calls,” she told him, frozen in place in the center of their bed. “I don’t have many favors to call in or strings to pull, but whatever I can, tell Jim I’m going to try?”

“I know he’ll appreciate it.” His shirt now back on, Leo returned to her to stroke a hand through his hair and kiss her goodbye. “Call me if you hear anything?”

“I will. You do the same.” She closed her eyes against the sadness, gripped the back of Leo’s neck to keep him close. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” He rested his forehead against her temple. “I’ll let you know when I get there. I’m going to pick up some good whiskey on the way. If there was ever a time for it, it’s now.”

* * *

 

Dr. Danielle Blake smoothed down the thick gray fabric of her skirt as she sat in the chair in reception. Her ankles had been neatly crossed for the better part of an hour and, as a result, her legs were starting to ache.

Her dress uniform usually remained in the back of her closet at home, neatly pressed, but unworn. Jim and Spock typically had to appear at headquarters or at diplomatic events that required such attire. However, she was typically spared.

Today was a completely different situation, though. James T. Kirk’s career was riding on what transpired in the depths of the building, would live or die in an instant.

If the air conditioning hadn’t been on as high as it was, she was certain she’d have started to sweat.

“Dr. Blake?” The gentleman behind the desk perked up and leaned a little over the broad glass desk. “The Admiral will see you now.”

She let out a breath as she stood. “Thank you, Benjamin.”

“I trust you know the way?” He smiled at her, polite, but also genuine.

“Yes, thank you.” She tipped her cap to him and pivoted to head through the now-open frosted doors.

The walls were lined with alternating photos of members of Starfleet who were instrumental throughout its history and photographs and art of the development of various Terran space programs. The hallways were somewhat darker than reception and what she knew the offices to be, though that was inevitable as a consequence of the sheer amount of sunshine and natural light that poured into each room through the floor-to-ceiling windows.

She’d frequented Pike’s office a little further down the corridor on many occasions. The one before her, not so much.

Danielle knocked courteously and was met with a bark of ‘ _come in’_ that persuaded her to enter. There would be no turning back after this.

The Admiral looked up, one half of his mouth curved upward. “Lieutenant Commander Blake.”

The honorific had been much more enjoyable earlier in the day.

“Sir,” she greeted him respectfully and removed her cap. Even if it galled her to do so.

His own hat rested on the side of his desk instead of atop his salt and pepper curls. There was more gray than she remembered. “I hope the wait was not too difficult for you. I have been in meetings all day and your appearance was not scheduled or expected, at that.”

Her fingers gripped the bill of the hat tighter. “I understand that, Sir, and thank you for seeing me on such short notice.”

The Admiral considered her as he stood and walked around the glass. Despite the fact that he was pushing sixty, he still had broad shoulders and an intimidating disposition that instilled fear in the hearts of many. In fact, he relished that reputation.

“Well, now that you’re here…” He folded his arms crossed his chest. “It would be nice to know the occasion.”

“I—“ She cleared her throat and took a deep breath. “I take it that you are aware of the disciplinary committee’s decision regarding Captain Kirk, sir?”

“Of course, Lieutenant Commander,” he replied, almost dismissively. “I was there when the decision was made.”

The condescending tone rankled her, but she had to keep her cool. For Jim, if nothing else.

“Well, I was hoping to discuss the possibility that the committee might alter its decision in some way.” It was calculatedly a statement, rather than a question, as Danielle knew that he would be more receptive if she made her intentions clear.

“I see.” His tone betrayed nothing.

“I understand that you are the longest-tenured member of the disciplinary committee, Sir, and as such, the other members hold your opinion in high esteem.” Each word made her feel sick, like she was betraying herself, everything she had become. “I also understand that while the committee has issued its decision, it is not yet final until Captain Kirk’s orders have been processed. And they _haven’t_.”

A grin crossed the Admiral’s features, but it wasn’t particularly happy. More amused than anything else. “Ah, yes. You always were good at your homework, weren’t you? All those nights you locked yourself in your bedroom, nose in your books. Homework was your strong suit.”

She struggled not to visibly bristle. “Yes, sir.”

“Then you also know that the kind of favor you’re asking from me goes beyond the kind a father might do for his daughter.”

Her jaw clenched. “Yes, sir.”

The Admiral regarded her, eyes never leaving her face as he started his slow walk around her form, where she stood in the near-center of the room at parade rest.

“Commander Fabien is due to be promoted in a year. She’ll be getting her own ship.” He lifted his chin, focus remaining solely on her. “I persuade the disciplinary committee to take…” The Admiral flicked his hand with a flourish. “ _Alternative_ action that keeps Kirk aboard the Enterprise and out of the Academy and you, in exchange, agree that when the offer to transfer to the Sagittarius and take over the position of First Officer comes around-- ” He stopped immediately, positioned in front of her. “You’ll accept.”

Danielle felt her chest constrict. She did not know what sending Kirk back to the Academy entailed: whether he would have to go through being a cadet anew, be forced to teach or train in a menial position, or some other form of punishment altogether.

Regardless, Jim could no longer count on being the poster boy for enlisting in Starfleet to get him out of trouble. Even if he didn’t know it quite yet, the only thing he had to count on to save his career was his Strategic Operations Officer.

The blonde thought about the implications of the proposed agreement. Rather clearly, she would have to leave the friends that had become her family behind. That included Jim, as well as Nyota and the rest of the bridge crew, her security teams.

And of course, Leonard.

They would be torn away from each other in a year, just after they’d started really building their lives together. In fact, they had been officially living together for just over a month and waking up to him in a bed, in a _place_ they considered to be theirs rather than his or hers had yet to grow old. He was already in every nook and cranny of that apartment.

Danielle was not sure if they could survive such a separation. It was doubtful he would leave his post on the Enterprise even if there was a position on the Sagittarius, nor would she want him to. He and Kirk worked well together, despite McCoy’s persisting exasperation with his friend, and there was no way she was going to break up that partnership.

Even if it came at the expense of her relationship with the only man she’d ever found love and companionship with.

“Yes,” she finally spoke, tongue feeling like cotton in her mouth. “I will accept the offer.”

“Very well.” The Admiral returned to his chair and his PADD as if she’d never been there in the first place. That only served to further stoke her ire. “Dismissed, Lieutenant Commander.”

“Thank you, Sir.”

She turned on her heel and set her cap back on her head, battling the roiling and twisting of her stomach. Danielle had just made it to the door when she heard the Admiral’s voice once again. “Two Blakes in command,” he noted aloud. “Perhaps one day, all three of us will be serving together—yourself, your sister, and I. Quite a legacy.” The Admiral exhaled a satisfied hum. “I’ll send your regards to your mother. She’ll be pleased to hear the news.”

Her fists balled tightly at her sides and she was sure he could see it. Maybe, he even took joy in the victory of it. “Yes, Sir,” she acknowledged with no other words willing and available at her disposal and hurried from the office.

All those years trying to climb out of her father’s shadow, striking out to make a name for herself as not _a_ Blake, but Dr. Danielle Blake, had now been voided out and for naught.

And worse yet, she had no idea how she was going to explain herself to Leo.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Of all the god damn impulsive things,” a voice growled in her ear. “I’m in the process of calling in every favor I’ve amassed in my career, finally making some headway, only to hear that John recalled an emergency meeting of the disciplinary committee. I’d tell you that Jim is no longer being sent back to the Academy, but I have a feeling you already knew that.”
> 
> She pinched the bridge of her nose. He’d always been so smart. It was one of the reasons she’d grown up idolizing her godfather: his ability to not only plan several moves ahead, but to reason his way back to the origins of any problem. “I did.”

It felt foreign to walk into Jim’s apartment building in her dress uniform. The rotating security guards had seen her in plain clothes for most of the nine months that the captain had called the glass edifice home, often dragging Jim behind her in varying states of inebriation.

Sometimes it was just them, more often a trio that included Leonard, but never alone in in gray from head to toe.

It was stranger still to have a cap to tip back at Lawrence, the doorman for as long as Kirk had been living there plus a whole decade. He found amusement and joy in it, where she found awkwardness. On any other day, they would have likely shared a laugh.

Today was not any other day.

When she got to Jim’s penthouse, she was quick to knock, just wanting to peel off at least the cap and jacket to somewhat resemble herself again. However, her surprise must have been evident when Leo was the one to open the door.

“Darlin’?” He was barefoot in jeans and a long-sleeve shirt pushed up to his elbows. “Everything okay?” he asked, forehead creased with concern.

“I just need to talk to Jim,” she blurted out, ducking past him and into the living area. Anything to avoid having to tell her boyfriend about the deal she’d made with her father.

His reply didn’t come until she was already well past him. “Jim’s not here.”

Danielle’s green eyes found the digital display on the wall and noted the time. It had been two and a half hours since her meeting with the Admiral, which was followed by a pensive walk through the gardens until she decided to sit on a bench near the bay to be alone with her thoughts.

Ignoring them had been decidedly better.

At any rate, the blonde wondered if enough time had passed for her father to pull all of his string to set off the dominoes, to rescind Jim’s reassignment and swap it for a demotion instead with her godfather at the helm in his place.

She hadn’t heard from Chris yet, but it didn’t mean that call wouldn’t come soon.

Danielle’s gaze swept the apartment, landing on a broom and dustpan propped against wall on the other side of the room. “How many things did he break?”

Leonard’s hands were stuffed into the front pockets of his jeans once he came to stand next to her. “Two glasses and a vase. I didn’t even know the kid _owned_ a vase.” He exhaled in a huff. “At least he had the good sense to keep his mitts off the bottle of whiskey.”

The corner of her mouth lifted as amusement temporarily broke through the surface. “I take it you bought the good stuff, then?”

He shook his head. “It’s decent enough, but it in my extensive experience, it doesn’t matter what you drink when you’re trying to drown your sorrows so long as it gets you drunk as fast as possible. Taste doesn’t matter. Still…” McCoy looked over at where scratches lingered on the wall from the thick-walled vase. “There’s some things you just _don’t_ do.”

“Like throw a perfectly drinkable bottle of whiskey?” Danielle offered helpfully.

“Exactly.” His body turned inward so that he was facing her. Even with her hat on, the blonde was at least four inches shorter than him. “And on the subject of things you don’t do, what’s with the uniform?” He tapped the brim. “I know they’re better than our cadet reds, but I’ve heard you complain every single time you’ve put on the dress grays. So what gives?”

Her stomach did roughly seven backflips and then a full twist straight into a blender. “I told you. I had to go try and pull whatever strings I could.”

“They must have been really hard to reach if calls weren’t enough.”

“I forgot how much I hated the bureaucracy of it all,” Danielle noted. She deposited the cap on the nearby side table next to the couch. “Makes me remember why I refused to enlist for so long.”

“Cowtowing aside, how’d it go?”

She cleared her throat. No matter how many times she practiced what to say while sitting on that park bench, nothing had seemed suitable. How did you tell the love of your life that you’d traded your morals and relationship? “Well—“

The woman was saved by the chirp of her communicator.

_Adm. Christopher Pike_

Or maybe not.

“It’s Uncle Chris,” she told him with the phone already halfway to her ear and feet carrying her over to the doors to the balcony. “I’m gonna, ah—I’m gonna take this outside.”

When the door was safely closed behind her, leaving a very confused Leonard McCoy blinking on the other side, she took a deep breath before answering. “Hello?”

“Of all the god damn _impulsive_ things,” a voice growled in her ear. “I’m in the process of calling in every favor I’ve amassed in my career, finally making some headway, only to hear that John recalled an emergency meeting of the disciplinary committee. I’d tell you that Jim is no longer being sent back to the Academy, but I have a feeling you already knew that.”

She pinched the bridge of her nose. He’d always been so smart. It was one of the reasons she’d grown up idolizing her godfather: his ability to not only plan several moves ahead, but to reason his way back to the origins of any problem. “I did.”

Chris heaved a sigh. “I’m afraid to ask, but I’m sure I’ll find out anyway, so might as well. What did you give him in return?”

“… what do you mean?”

“You’ve barely spoken in over a decade. I know that he tried to get in touch with you in the Academy, arrange meetings with different members of the brass. Whether it was to help groom you to carry on his legacy or if he just wanted to parade you around like a show pony, I don’t know. But I _do_ know you wouldn’t respond to a single attempt. Your father isn’t used to hearing the word _no_.” There was a pause. “I know John Blake as well as I know myself. He would have wanted something from you for any favor you’d have asked of him _and_ taken payment upfront.”

Her knuckled were turning white where her hand gripped the metal railing. “Commander Fabien is first in line in the fleet to be promoted and he thinks she’ll get the Montgomery next year. When that happens, I—“ She grit her teeth. “I will be offered the opportunity to take over her position.”

“And you have to accept,” Chris finished for her. “Jesus fucking Christ, Danielle.”

“I know.”

“Does McCoy?”

“… not yet.” Her voice was softer now. “You’d have heard the level of destruction occurring in this apartment from wherever you are if he did.”

“To be a fly on the wall for that conversation.” Her godfather’s tone was anything but amused.

“If they didn’t put Jim back on the ship, I’m not doing _anything_ , Uncle Chris. He still has to hold up his end of the bargain.” It felt as much like grasping at straws as it actually was.

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that because Spock is being reassigned elsewhere, Jim is being demoted to first officer, and I’ve got the ship.”

A maelstrom of facts hit her at once. Danielle did her best to compartmentalize them in order of importance. “You’re back on active duty?”

There was the tiniest hint of a smile in his voice. “Yeah,” Pike affirmed. “It surprised me, too. I’d made peace with the fact I was never going to sit in the chair again, on the Enterprise or anywhere else. I was always going to miss it, all of us do, but I really thought that time in my life was over. You’ve got younger, bright potential captains in much larger supply again after the massive hit we took last year.” The word _Nero_ inserted itself between the lines. “Why would they want an aging guy like me who needs a cane to get around when they could just have one of them?”

“Because your reputation speaks for itself,” she countered, conviction returning to her voice. “I like Fabien just fine, she was always nice to me as a kid, but she’s not _you_.”

“You know, the fact that we’d have a real chance to serve together for more than a few years was one of the first things to cross my mind. It was selfish,” he conceded, “but something I’d always hoped for. When I went looking for your father to see what the hell had happened, he said I should enjoy serving on the ship with you while I could. For a split second, I thought it was a threat. Then I realized it meant something else entirely.”

“I couldn’t just stand by and do nothing. Spock is not meant to be our captain. For all of Jim’s faults, he’d have done for anyone on the crew what he did for Spock. He’d never leave a single being behind. He’s a good man.” She raked her fingers roughly through the hair from her forehead to the start of her ponytail. “Jim being on the Enterprise is what’s best for everyone and now you, being on the bridge, is just as good if not better.”

When all Danielle heard was Chris’s breathing on the other end of the line, she knew that something was wrong. The relative silence continued on for what felt like hours. “Sunshine, Spock was never going to get the Enterprise. He’d have needed to jump quite a few people in line.”

The realization hit her like a brick to the fact.

“… Commander Fabien was next to get a ship.” Her vision blurred as her eyes turned glassy with frustrated tears. “He gets to keep Fabien for another year _and_ then, gets me for who knows how long out of the deal. Any other way, he gets nothing.” Danielle’s chest tightened and it was suddenly incredibly difficult to breathe. She absently wondered if Leo was still close enough to see her drop if she passed out from lack of oxygen. “He knew. He fucking _knew_.”

Chris had always said that her father had been one of few people he could seldom beat at three-dimensional chess. Now she understood why that had been the case.

“He knew that if Jim was sent back to the Academy, I would want to stop it from happening. He knows—what Jim means to me and to Leo and that I’d have no other choice but to come to him for a favor.” She sunk down into one of the chairs, legs suddenly unsteady under her weight. “So he waited and I played right into his hands.” She snorted bitterly. “I had to wait in reception for an hour for a few minutes of his time. No—he _made_ me wait, when he already knew why I was there and what his offer was going to be. And all his time, Jim was a means to an end.”

Her whole body felt like it was no longer her own and her vision was turning black at the edges. Was this what people felt like when they had a nervous breakdown?

“I’m going to fix this,” her godfather insisted lowly. “I promise you that this isn’t going to stand. But right now, I need to find Jim and tell him before he does something stupid or reckless or, more likely, both that will undermine every sacrifice and every deal we’ve both made for him.”

“I don’t—“ she croaked. “I don’t know where he is. Leo said he stormed off somewhere.”

“I know this is a lot to ask of you right now, but do you think you could ask Leonard if he knows?” He was met by silence. “Danielle?”

Her legs were still shaky as she pushed herself up from the chair. “Yeah, just—just give me a second.”

 

The glass door creaked open and Leonard’s head snapped up where he was sitting on the couch. A holovid was on, but it was merely background noise to him.

“Hey…” Danielle called out to him softly. “Uncle Chris wants to know if you have any idea where Jim might have gone? He’s not answering his comm.”

“Of course he wouldn’t because it’s not like another rogue Romulan could attack at any moment or anything.” McCoy’s scowl was particularly impressive, but it was only heightened by the sight of her red-rimmed eyes. Something was wrong. “You’ll probably find him at MacGregor’s.”

“The one right off campus?”

“Yeah. He’s always had a soft spot for that place. Plus… makes for a special brand of nostalgic masochism.”

Leonard watched her nod and angle the communicator back towards her lips. “He thinks he went to MacGregor’s. Do you want us to-- ?”

The question died on her lips as she listened to her godfather’s words. “No. I’ll handle it. I think it’s better if it comes from me. He’s… the closest thing I’ve ever had to a son.”

The lump in her throat was painfully thick. “He deserves better than this.”

“He does,” Pike agreed, “but this is certainly better than the alternative. He can work his way back this way. The other was—well, we both know it was a death sentence for his Starfleet career.” A beat of silence hung between them. “I’ll tell Jim how this started. He’s going to find out anyway and probably in the worst way possible. Still, Danielle?”

The blonde braced herself. “Yeah?”

“You need to tell Leonard.” His tone was sympathetic, but left little room for argument. “Jim wouldn’t tell him if you asked him not to, he owes you that much, but you shouldn’t keep this a secret from him. It may mean he doesn’t get hurt now, but it’ll be that much worse when the time comes.”

The dart of her eyes in his direction wasn’t lost on him either. “Yeah, I will.”

“It’s going to be okay, Sunshine,” Chris promised, warmth seeping from his words. “Everything is going to be okay. I love you, kiddo.”

“I love you, too.” The urge to cry was overwhelming. “Let me know how it goes.”

She received a promise that he would and then the call ended, although she did not move a muscle for many passing seconds. Danielle could feel Leonard’s gaze boring into her from across the room.

She finally put the communicator back in her bag. It bought her an extra minute to compose herself and school her features, even if she did not know how long that would hold.

“What was that about?” Leo inquired, closing the gap between them. His head was cocked inquisitively. “Why is he going looking for Jim?”

Danielle’s back was still facing him and she fumbled around in her bag for absolutely nothing in particular, merely desiring a distraction. “The committee changed their decision. He’s not going back to the Academy.”

McCoy’s instinct was to celebrate, but he could ascertain from her behavior that something was _off_. She seemed too morose for the story to begin and end there. “Chris manage to change their minds?” The sudden rigidity of her body struck him. Immediately, her attire made sense. “Or did you change their minds?”

She looked wounded when she managed to muster up the courage to look at him. “You should probably sit for this conversation.”

His chest heaved with the force of a sigh. “Gee, that doesn’t sound ominous or anything. Should I fix myself a drink, too?”

“A stiff one,” Danielle murmured and deposited her hat on the side table. “Possibly a double.”

“Well, _shit_.” He retrieved his half-downed tumbler with dexterous fingers from the glass coffee table and sank onto one of the couch cushions with surprising grace. “Should I fix _you_ a drink?”

She joined him on the sofa, yet kept a carefully calculated amount of distance between their bodies. “Maybe after.” _If you haven’t thrown me out, that is._ She neatly folded her hands in her lap. “What would you like to know?”

He considered the amber liquid carefully prior to making a decision. “What is going to happen to him?”

Explaining that part of the deal came easily. “Officially, he’ll be demoted to First Officer and Spock will be transferred to another ship. Uncle Chris will be reinstated as commanding officer.”

Leonard breathed in relief. “Well, that doesn’t sound as bad as I thought it was going to be. Sure, it’s bullshit that he’s being disciplined in the first place, but he gets to stay on the Enterprise and your godfather can continue to mentor him. It’ll only make him a better captain in the long-run when he gets back in the chair again. And _hey_.” He nudged her leg with his knee. “I know you’d always hoped you would get to serve with him after the Academy. You get the chance to do that now for the foreseeable future. Softens the blow a little, y’know?”

She shook her head with closed eyes. “I did something very stupid.”

“Stupid was not leaving Spock in that goddamn volcano,” Leo groused, yet the manner in which he touched her cheek was tender. It was the perfect illustration of the natural dichotomy she had the privilege of observing. “It can’t be as bad.”

Her green eyes were glassy when they lifted. “… I only had one string to pull, Leo.”

The statement perplexed him at first. Danielle Blake was a distinguished and well-respected officer in her own right. Maybe she hadn’t amassed many favors during her short tenure on the Enterprise, but her instructors in the Academy would most likely go to bat for her if it absolutely came to that. Besides, it wouldn’t look favorably upon Starfleet if something happened to the daughter of one admiral and the goddaughter of another.

Then again, if Chris hadn’t been able to overturn the committee’s decision on his own, even with his reputation and position within the ranks, how the hell had a lieutenant commander with just over a year of service under her belt managed to accomplish such a feat?

His next thought slammed into him like a ton of bricks.

“Your father,” he surmised quietly. It wasn’t posed as a question.

“He—he offered me a deal: become his First Officer in a year when Commander Fabien gets her own ship and Jim gets to stay on the Enterprise.” Her next breath left her lungs with a shudder. “I _had_ to take it, Leo. There wasn’t going to be another way—“

Leonard McCoy had never thought he would ever have to experience again the soul-shattering heartbreak that wracked his body when Jocelyn informed him that she was leaving him for Clay Treadway and taking their daughter with her, using the most hurtful and hateful words that could she could possibly spew from her lips.

He was wrong.

His leg jerked back. “You’re leaving.”

“Not right now.” She picked at a phantom thread on her skirt. “In about a year. Maybe a little more if things are delayed.” Danielle decided now was not the best time to confess that her father had come out as the victor in a well-played game of chess using both Starfleet brass and officers for pieces on the board. “But eventually, yes. The Enterprise, anyway.”

Leonard returned his glass to the table, setting it down harder than he’d intended. She flinched. “And you didn’t think that maybe you should discuss it with me first? Or did you just figure it was your career, your decision, and my opinion didn’t matter?”

“I didn’t think the offer would stay on the table if I left his office. Leo, you have to understand…”

“Let me tell you what I understand,” he seethed. “You decided to make a life-altering decision and expected me to blindly accept that there’s now an expiration date on our relationship.”

“Leo,” she rasped, normally steady-hands trembling as she reached for him only to recoil when he ducked out of range. “I promise I never meant to—“

“To what? To hurt me?” McCoy laughed bitterly. “Well, at least you’re not leaving me for another man. _That’s_ a refreshing change. Although, you definitely get bonus points for doing it within three weeks of moving in together and introducing me to your grandparents.”

“What choice did I have, Leo?” she shot back in defense of her actions, flush with misery. “Don’t tell me if you were in my shoes, you wouldn’t have made the same choice!”

He groaned. “Oh, don’t give me that fucking hypothetical _bullshit_ , Danielle! I don’t have much in life, but I always figured I got a job I’m pretty damn good at and an incredible woman who, for some reason completely beyond all logic, actually likes having me around, so I was doin’ alright. But, sweetheart,” he drawled lowly and the endearment was anything but kind on his tongue, “a job don’t keep me warm at night.”

All Danielle wanted to do was curl up in a ball, knees tucked up to her chin, but the inflexibility of the wool uniform restricted her movement too much. Leonard’s blow had struck her deeply, probably even more than intended.

“It was the only way to keep everyone safe,” she whispered. Her vision was blurred so immensely by tears that it was impossible to gauge his reaction. “Jim was never going to come back from the Academy and for all I knew, they were going to happily hand the chair over to Spock as a reward for being their perfect _lapdog_.” She violently wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. “You said it yourself: if Jim was in the volcano and Spock on the bridge, he’d have let Jim _die,_ Leo. What if someday, it’s Hikaru? Or Pavel? Or Scotty?” What if—“ Her voice cracked. “What if it’s _you_?” She tasted saltwater at the corner of her mouth and realized that tears were no longer threatening, but falling. “I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you and I could have prevented it. I refuse to take that chance.”

The fury that boiled in Leo’s veins slowed to a simmer. He couldn’t deny that he’d said those words, which he knew hadn’t been rash in the moment. They were as accurate now as they’d been days ago.

As much as he was loathe to admit it, Danielle had a point.

The doctor sighed, leaning to slump against the back of the couch. “So where do we go from here then?”

The vice around her heart seemed to unclench just enough to allow it to beat again. “Forward, I guess. There’s not much else to do until I have to hold up my end of the bargain and anyway, a year is a long time.”

“Not when you thought you’d have at least thirty or forty times that, probably more.”

Well, that certainly caught her attention, but their current predicament didn’t leave the room for discussion the statement deserved. “It’s not forever, Leo. We’re not always on missions and there will be plenty of times we’re both planetside.” She dared to brush her fingertips against the side of his kneecap. “We can still share a bed, a home, a _life_ , even if the first happens a little less often than we’d like.”

Leonard stared blankly at the ceiling. The feeling was still strangely familiar. “This is how it started, you know.” He could feel her gaze on him, so he rolled his head to the side. “Jocelyn and I. We shared all of that, too, less and less until we didn’t anymore.”

Emboldened, her hand traveled until it landed over his wrist. “So I give him six to twelve months on the Sagittarius and then I call it a career. We’ll only be separated for less than a year and then I’m home whenever you are. ”

“You _can’t_ —“

“I had a real good run, Leo. I won’t get to serve with my sister, but I will get to have Uncle Chris as my CO for a while and I can proudly say I helped save the world once. I mean, that’s far more than I ever expected. Especially the saving the world thing.” For the first time, her face softened and maybe, she held a little hope. “I never promised him I’d take the job forever. I just have to put in a little time to make good on our deal and then it’ll be one last middle finger to him before I ride off into the sunset.”

His jaw clenched. “You’re willing to give up your career because of _him_.” McCoy felt the anger rise and boil in his veins. “The job that you _love_ and worked your whole life for. That doesn’t sound like a ride off into the sunset to me.”

Danielle fell silent for a long while in response. Then she started to unbutton her jacket until it fell open and she could neatly fold it to set it aside on the side table beneath her hat. She turned back to him in just a white cotton tank top tucked into her skirt.

“I do love my job,” she conceded with a tilt of her head. “As much as I ran away from Starfleet for the first twenty-plus years of my life, it was really the only thing I ever _wanted_.” She exhaled a short, sad laugh. “As soon as I finished my PhD, work was all I had. Trading the private sector for the Federation didn’t change that. But the Enterprise did.” She absently smoothed her hair back towards her ponytail. “I have made some incredible friends who have become my family. I have _you_ , Leo. None of that changes when I leave. At least, I hope not.” When she looked up at during a long breath, an undercurrent of fear was evident. “But that isn’t necessarily up to me alone.”

Leo’s posture grew rigid and he sat up again. “And if it _was_ up to you?”

“I told you that for me, the only way out of this was in a body bag. That hasn’t changed.”

“And I still have absolutely no fucking idea what I want my future to look like,” he countered with a snort. “But I know I want you in it. We can fill in the specifics as we go.”

He was immeasurably pleased when she smiled genuinely for the first time since that morning. “Yeah?” Her whole face lit up with the force of it.

McCoy clasped his larger, perpetually-steady hands around her right and drew it to his mouth so he could kiss the center of her palm. The tightness in his chest was still present, but it wasn’t a constricting anymore. “Yeah.”

Leonard kissed the inside of her wrist and then continued his path up the length of her arm. He stopped once he reached the strip of fabric over her shoulder. “I love you, Leo,” she said softly. “There is never going to be anybody else. There never was.”

He slid closer to cradle the back of her head for a kiss. Though, he took his time, running his nose up her jaw and along her cheek. The doctor knew his girlfriend was angry and frustrated with the circumstances and even if he couldn’t do anything to change them, he could show her that where they were concerned, she had nothing to worry about.

His lips eventually found their target and moved slowly against the soft pink flesh, deft fingers massaging her scalp. The ministrations elicited a soft moan and she took a breath. Her face was tinted pink.

“Sorry,” Danielle murmured, bashful.

Despite the fact they’d done unspeakable things to each other in the dark (and truthfully, the light just as often), the surprising shyness sent warmth shuttling through Leonard’s veins. “Nothing to be sorry about, Darlin’.” He gently pulled her hair tie free so her hair could tumble freely. “It is one of my favorite sounds of all-time.”

“… what are the others?”

“Your laugh,” he told her at once, lips curled fondly, “and you do this thing in your sleep where you snuggle closer to me and sigh like it’s the best place to be in the universe.” His fingertips skimmed down her cheek to the point of her chin. Then the pad of Leo’s thumb pushed up until it stroked across her lower lip. “But I’d say the top spot is definitely all the ways you say my name. Every variation. And it isn’t necessarily sexual.”

“I’m kind of surprised there aren’t more lascivious sounds in your Top 5.”

“Well.” He cocked his head. “There are at least half a dozen others that I’ve made the decision to group together under the title of ‘ _Sex Noises’_ to give the others a fair chance.” At the close proximity, she could see the distinctive flecks of gold in his hazel eyes. It dawned on her suddenly how much he was crowding her. “Should I include those, too?” he inquired with a risen brow and she felt his breath tickling her skin.

Her fingers twisted into the hem of his tee-shirt. “I’m not sure. I can’t seem to recall what noises you speak of, so I suppose you’ll just have to remind me.”

“The pleasure would be all mine, Darlin’.”

She licked her lips, pointedly slow in her movements. “No, it won’t.”

“… you’re absolutely right,” he growled lowly and she could swear she saw the moment his pupils dilated. “It sure as shit won’t be _all_ mine.”

Leonard barely uttered the words completely before he had surged the remaining distance between their faces to kiss her. It was more forceful than she was regularly accustomed to, but Danielle did not have any objection given the circumstances. For all he’d calmed and grown to understood her reasons, as well as her future intentions, McCoy was still in pain.

She knew the feeling all too well.

The surprising warmth of his fingertips slipping beneath her newly-untucked shirt ( _smooth, Leonard_ ) drew her from her thoughts and back into the moment. It did not take an empath to know where the couple was headed, but she also recognized they weren’t in the comfort of their own space.

“… I’m afraid of what this couch might be contaminated with,” she laughed quietly against his ear, in the perfect position to do so with his mouth latched onto her neck. “I mean, we’re talking about Jim here.”

“I really wish we weren’t,” he groused in reply.

“Well, this _is_ his apartment. I didn’t just decide to bring it up while you have me pinned to our bed.” She gave his hip a squeeze. “It’s kind of hard not to mention it when there’s a framed photo of him and—“ Her eyes darted to the side table between their sofa and the neighboring love seat that was cattycorner and she blanched. “Okay, we’re moving…” she declared with a shudder.”

“What?” His teeth grazed her jaw and then he blinked up at her. Leo caught the minute tip of her head and followed her gaze to the picture. “Yeah.” He groaned with a hint of disgust, nodding at the sight of Jim shaking the now-Admiral Pike’s hand on the day he’d relieved him of command. “We’re moving.”

There was a reason they kept holophotos in their respective quarters on the Enterprise and her apartment. Very easy to switch off to avoid killing the mood.

“Besides,” he continued as he climbed off the couch and extended a hand. “God only knows who and what Jim has brought onto this couch. I’m all for interspecies lovin’, but I doubt he actually knows what to clean this with, if he cleans it at all.” He shuddered, nearly full-bodied. “Danielle, sweetheart, love of my life—please _immediately_ get off that thing.” He rapidly curled and uncurled his fingers in an effort to get her to hurry. “I’m starting to get banta fever just looking at it.”

She held up her hands and rose without touching it any further. “Okay, okay. I will not go near the couch again. At least, not until I can adequately disinfect it.”

“Ugh.” Leonard grimaced. His hazel eyes darted all over the apartment. Was there nowhere they were safe?

Danielle’s lips twitched. She could read his thoughts as clearly as if there were actually speech bubbles over his head. Her fingers hooked into his belt loops. “The shower,” she decided for them and tugged him closer. “Self-cleaning. Remember after the first time I saw it, I told you I wanted to put one of those in our place, but I’d have to get a different showerhead and break the tile to install the vents?”

His throat ran dry. Not only did he recall that little piece of information, but he _definitely_ remembered the circumstances that gave rise to the discussion. “ _Yes_.” His index finger tugged at the scoop neck of his shirt. “I imagine that it also locks?”

“Mhmm…” the blonde hummed, using her position as leverage to tug him forward by his jeans and back with her towards the bedroom. “I like the way you’re thinkin’, Dr. McCoy.”

“I promise you that I’m trying the best I can, considering the current direction of blood flow.”

She barked out a laugh at that and relinquished her hold on him to open the bedroom door behind her. Given her line of vision, it was particularly difficult and she couldn’t seem to get the right angle to turn the knob.

Eventually, her boyfriend grew impatient and pinned her to the door with his body, mouth crashing onto mouth, even as he tried to finagle it open himself. He was eventually successful in his endeavor, but the panel opened blindly and they wound up falling through the open gap into a heap on the hardwood.

Laughter bubbled from her lips immediately and proved infectious when he joined in.

They never made it off the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, all! Long time, no see. Things are a little bit more settled at home these days, although work is insane. I've been using my morning commute to write, but sometimes I just need a darn NAP, you know?
> 
> I am so grateful for all of your reviews, especially your follow up ones telling me how much you couldn't wait for an update. I just couldn't leave you hanging any longer!
> 
> This scene took me a really long time to write because it required me to write both McCoy and Blake under the influence of emotions that were all over the spectrum. Oddly, I had a random light bulb moment while treating myself to a massage with a gift card I'd gotten for my birthday. Long story short, I wrote the scene from the beginning until the end of her call with Pike in my head during my time on the table. Take inspiration where you can get it, I guess!
> 
> I hope you like this chapter. The you-know-what is only going to hit the fan from here!
> 
> LLAP!


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So fine then,” she surmised and rested her head against his shoulder. “Now that our shoes have stopped attacking us, I’m realizing this has a very ‘Seven minutes in heaven’ vibe going for it.”
> 
> “… Jim is banned from our apartment indefinitely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my dear friend/beta/sounding board, Dana, who was recently evacuated from her home in California due to the wildfires. <3

They ultimately decided that no good would come of lingering in Jim’s apartment, so Leonard and Danielle began the absurd process of tracking down the articles of clothing that had been flung about the captain’s bedroom.

The blonde found amusement in the notion that she had done something that Kirk himself would have enjoyed. However, she did start to wonder whether he was capable of hacking into the electronic locking mechanism on her front door and had beaten her to the punch. The train of thought was rather suddenly derailed by a loud string of curses across the hardwood.

Blake’s head snapped up from where she retrieved a shoe, spotting McCoy kneeling next to the side of the bed. She didn’t even bother to restrain herself from running her fingertips down his spine. “Did you hurt yourself, Dr. McCoy?” she purred, a quirk of a smile making an appearance.

“Did I--? _No_.” His forehead creased with annoyance. “I may be old by Jim’s standards, but I ain’t dead. Thought I’d proved as much a short while ago.”

“You did,” she affirmed with a short dip of her head. “ _Twice_ , as I recall.”

Leonard’s smirking grin would have been positively infuriating if it didn’t make her consider whether a third round was out of the question. Alas, she really preferred to enjoy her boyfriend in the comfort of their own bed. “Well, what’s the matter then?”

“My _shirt_ ,” he groused, lipped curled in repulsion.

His girlfriend was perplexed. “Your… _shirt_?”

“Yeah, my shirt! It’s under the bed and God only _knows_ what bacteria and viruses live under this godforsaken thing.”

“So just steal one of his and we can wash the one under the bed with the stuff hospitals use for the infectious disease units. It’s not a big deal. I’m taking a pair of his sweats to wear home, anyway.”

He abandoned his pursuit of the fabric to get to his feet. His frown was particularly spectacular, even using him as the standard. “You are absolutely _not_ wearing any of Jim’s pants.”

“A little possessive, are we?” she challenged with a risen brow, index fingers hooking onto his belt loops.

“Of my bodily facilities and skin, maybe.” Leonard exhaled with a snort. “I look back on the memory of you knocking Jim on his ass on Christmas morning rather fondly.”

Danielle’s head tipped to the side and she fixed him with a half-hearted glare. With everything that had transpired in the past few hours, the last thing that she wanted to do was walk around in her Starfleet uniform as though everything was fine when it wasn’t even close.

They didn’t have a sense of inevitability and sadness hovering over them like a storm cloud, largely because a year was as far away as it felt. In the back of her mind, however, she’d always know where she was headed, no matter what they did.

“Well, the way I see it, you’ve now got two choices here,” she reasoned. “You can either put on your big boy pants and retrieve your shirt _or_ you can leave it under the bed for Jim to find at some unknown point in time and just wear your hoodie home instead. Up to you, McCoy.”

He stared back at her, unblinking, and she could feel the annoyance rolling off of him in waves. After a prolonged silence, he turned on his heel and dropped to the floor again.

“Gonna need to bathe in god damn _bleach_ tonight.”

* * *

As it turned out, Leonard did not actually immerse himself in a tub of bleach upon their arrival at the apartment, but instead scrubbed himself from head to toe with the antiseptic soap he occasionally brought home from shifts at the hospital when he was too tired to shower on site. Sure, it was a bit of overkill in his girlfriend’s opinion, but if it served as a distraction from the ongoing clusterfuck of their lives, she would graciously accept it.

A puff of steam floated through the now-open bathroom door, signaling that he’d finally deemed himself to be safely out of the woods of possible contamination, and Leonard padded out a few heartbeats later. His hair was damp and mussed, likely from a hasty attempt to towel dry the sopping strands.

As ridiculous as it objectively looked, it was also a little endearing. These were the moments where he looked so young that it actually startled her. Danielle couldn’t fathom that there were people he knew that would never be privy to this sight, including most of whom he counted among his colleagues and friends.

It was harder still to believe at one point in time, she had similarly been on the outside looking in.

Leonard’s brows furrowed once he realized she was staring and he broke her train of thought. “Do I have something on my face?” he grumbled, back now to her as he rifled through his top drawer.

She laughed, shaking her head. “Just remembering the first time I got to see you in a towel.”

McCoy’s posture morphed from defensive to loose and a little cocksure in a matter of moments. He turned his gaze on her. “I see.”

“As do I,” Danielle concurred with a slow wink from where she was propped up against some pillows in bed.

“Was it a good memory?”

“Mhmm. I recall thinking it was somewhat of a religious experience.”

He let out a bark of laughter. “Darlin’, you sure know how to flatter a man.” He closed the drawer with his hip and then let the towel fall to a heap on the floor so that he could pull his boxers onto his legs. “You know what Geoff told me a few days ago at my physical?”

“Oh, you mean the physical you vehemently protested volunteering for until I persuaded you to get checked out by an objective third-party?”

“ _Persuaded_?” Leo snorted. “I seem to recall you very heavily insinuating that until I did so, I would not get to see you in any state of dress aside from your uniform on a daily basis.”

“Ergo…” Danielle flicked out her hands with a flourish. “I _persuaded_ you. Leo, you were down in Medbay within 35 minutes and it only took that long because we couldn’t get the coffee to brew.”

“Anyway,” McCoy shot her a look that closely resembled impatience, “he said that I’ve lost thirteen pounds in the last year and my body fat percentage is down about 6%.”

“That’s great, Leo!” She set aside her PADD so she could unleash the full force of her smile at him. “Of course, you were very handsome before. This doesn’t have anything to do with that. I’m just pretty invested in your overall well-being because I plan on having you around for a very long time.”

Warmth crept down his spine and wrapped itself around his limbs. “… I’ve also increased my muscle mass by 8%.”

Given that he was still standing in merely his underwear and had made no efforts to find a shirt or some form of bottoms, she took it as an open invitation to let her eyes wander. Danielle _had_ noticed that Leonard slimmed down a little recently, but she had chalked it up to keeping his metabolism fueled with three meals a day instead of a breakfast of coffee and a meager dinner he’d choke down if left to his own devices. Plus, she was insistent on him actually getting sleep at night, considering they shared a bed and she liked falling asleep next to him. The health advantages were a nice bonus.

She cocked her head. “Have you been going to the gym on the ship more?”

“No, but I have _definitely_ increased my level of physical activity,” he answered, a wryness heavy in his words and evidence in his features. Leonard looked just like the cat that ate the canary.

Danielle was baffled as to why he’d look so smug, at least until she gave him another once-over and realized precisely where most of the toning had occurred. “… _No_.”

McCoy grinned. “Oh yes.”

“Oh my god, _Leo_ … our sex life gave you abs?!?” She waved him over, opening and closing her fingers in a grabbing motion until he gave in. Leonard planted a knee on either side of her legs to hover over her and hands shot right to his chest, where they dragged down and proceeded along the length of his stomach. “No wonder you had to request new uniform pants. I’m a little proud of myself.”

“Hey now… you don’t build muscle from lying on your back all the time. I had something to do with it too, you know.”

“And it takes two to tango, McCoy. I thought they taught you that kind of stuff in medical school?”

His hazel eyes rolled in spectacular fashion. “Hardee har-har.”

Her touch shifted to the sides of his torso, thumbs angled inward, and she smiled without teeth as if trying to hide it. “You know I’d take you as you are, exceptional abdominal muscles or not, right? This is just the ice cream on top of the peach cobbler.”

Leonard flashed her the tiniest of smug smiles, if only to conceal how fiercely her assertion had struck him. The doctor was acutely aware that she loved him, but similar moments were peppered throughout their relationship and always caught him completely off-guard. “Now what do you know about peach cobbler?”

Blake’s green eyes narrowed at him. “Hey now.” She poked him in the side. “You’ve met my grandparents; you know I’ve got a little southern in me.”

He glanced down for a moment, mouth curling just a little more. When he looked up again, Danielle took note that the green of his irises was more prominent than the gold. His body dipped lower so that their faces were a hair apart. “How would you like to have a lot of southern in you?”

McCoy’s lips peeled back to give way to nearly all of his teeth. When it was clear he couldn’t contain his grin, it was his girlfriend’s turn to roll her eyes. “Yes, I see how very pleased you are with yourself.”

He closed the gap to kiss her. “Extremely.” Leo laughed quietly. “Thank you for setting me up for that one so well.”

“I walked right into it. How long have you been holding onto that line?”

“After I realized you had roots in Louisiana, but before we started sleeping together.”

“… so for over a year then?” Danielle scoffed at the timeframe. “I am so impressed I can’t even hold it against you. A+ on the long game.” She traced a path between some of the freckles on his tanned shoulder, a small, fond smile on her face. “I have to tell Jim.”

“You know,” Leo commented with a tilt of his head, “I think this is one instance where I really hope you do. Though, he’ll probably take credit for it in some way. He forgets that once upon a time, I was really good at this and actually convinced a girl to marry me.” Once he actually heard the words leave his mouth, he winced. “Okay, maybe I won’t use the last part as the basis of an argument.”

“Perhaps not.” She trailed her fingertips just across the juncture where his spine joined his neck with a touch that was both feather-light and reverent at the same time. “ _But_ I’m pretty sure you have some bragging rights.” Her fingers laced together just against his nape, resting there. “I mean, Jim _did_ walk in on us having sex once and while the kid may have been oblivious, he certainly was not blind.”

“Considering I was on top so he didn’t get to a single part of you he shouldn’t have, I say without regret that it was the least I could do to pay him back for the times I walked in on him and whatever company he was keeping for the evening.” He paused to think on it for a moment and then his eyes narrowed. “Or afternoon. There were some of those, too.”

Danielle blanched. She had been curious whether Jim’s sexual proclivities lived up to the reputation he’d garnered for himself at the Academy, but never enough to actually want to bear witness to them. It was merely human nature to find her interest piqued by the gossip mill.

“I swear, he did it on purpose to try to both fluster me and to force me to get out of the dorm and ‘socialize’. First of all, I’m a doctor. I know where babies come from. Made one of my own, in case he’s forgotten,” Leonard groused and his girlfriend could instantly tell he was well on his way to getting good and riled up. “Secondly, who the _hell_ was I supposed to socialize with? A bunch of _goddamn children_? I had six years on Jim, who had two to four years on everyone else!”

The blonde pressed her lips together, knowing he might have an embolism if she started to laugh. “Alright.” Her thumb brushed over the ridge where a vein throbbed in his forehead. “No reason to burst a blood vessel over it now, yeah? You’ve become plenty sociable with Geoff and Scotty and Hikaru and Christine, even Pavel, bless him.”

“I’ve still never seen a whisker on ‘im, but what can I say? The kid knows his vodka. Can’t help but like ‘im.”

“Right?” She felt a little of the tension start to ebb to a point where she was less worried about an aneurysm and more amused by his rant than anything else. “I’d also like to point out to your credit, Leo, that you’re getting laid _far_ more regularly than Jim is these days. You don’t have to wait until we get back from a mission to go to a bar or a club, either.”

He concurred with an emphatic nod. “You’re damn right, I don’t. I could teach _him_ a thing or two!

“I’m all for females of any and all species enjoying and exploring their sexuality. It’s the 23rd century. Just be safe and stay the hell out of my office,” he rolled on, oblivious to his girlfriend’s tenuous control over her threatening laughter. “However, no one can convince me that any one of them who ever slept with Jim Kirk could stack up against you, not even those Caitian twins from last night he was telling me about after his third glass. _Combined_.”

This time, a chuckle did escape her. “I’m not entirely sure how we arrived at this point in the conversation, but okay?”

“M’just sayin’ that I know you’re way out of my league, darlin’. But Jim is playin’ in Double A. Maybe even short-season Single A when I think about it.”

“Are you in Triple A in this scenario?” She cocked her head inquisitively. “Because I think you’re the reliable veteran in the majors who’s been around the block a few times. Maybe you were never the poster child of the team, but you know what I like about the most seasoned guy on the team?”

It was abundantly clear to Leonard he’d let the metaphor get away from him. “That he has halfway decent abdominal muscles?”

Danielle’s fingernails grazed the length of McCoy’s biceps and his face and eyes followed. He could feel the goosebumps starting to rise on the back of his neck. “When he gets to first base, he’s too experienced to get picked off. No, he’s the one you know is always going to score when the opportunity presents itself.”

Leo’s head snapped back to her face. That had _certainly_ gotten his attention, enough that the remainder of his tirade dissipated on his tongue. “… is the opportunity presenting itself?”

She answered with a coy smile and purposefully flicked her gaze to his mouth, where it lingered as a clear signal.

“Good God,” he groaned, “what a _woman_.”

The words had barely left his mouth before he dove down to kiss her, keeping his full body weight from resting on her so as not to crush her and kill the mood. However, Leonard McCoy was a handsy kisser and given his own recognition of that attribute, he turned himself just enough to roll them onto their sides. The change in positions gave him the ability to sink his nimble fingers into her long, soft hair and draw her so close to him that they were practically fused together in the pink and orange glow of the sun setting through the oversized windows.

The trail of his fingertips over her spine caused her to shiver, but also drew a smile to his lips. While there were some aspects of their relationship that he could reasonably rely on as constants, it was the tiny surprises that continued to result in surges of irrational joy. That had been one of them.

It was possible that Leonard was still a little numb to the implications of the devil’s bargain she’d struck with her father that morning. If anything, the whirlwind of events was fairly implausible and only served to stoke his resentment towards the man who was simply called The Admiral. He wasn’t certain whether the feeling was because he still held out hope that the man would change his mind and cut his daughter a break or that it merely hadn’t sunk in yet.

When it finally did, McCoy knew he’d feel it acutely and it’d catch him offguard at the worst, most inconvenient of times. He’d been there before, even if the circumstances were vastly different. Still, an empty bed was an empty bed, a place setting for one concrete evidence of loneliness.

At least it didn’t feel like that emptiness was right around the corner. Not yet, anyway. He’d stay firmly in denial until then and take advantage of it while he could.

Then the repeated chiming of her PADD burst that particular bubble.

Leo groaned. “You’re certainly popular this millisecond…”

“Don’t be jealous, Leo,” she chided after another kiss and arched back to reach for the tablet sitting on her nightstand.

“The tabloids probably found out about Jim’s demotion,” he rationalized, though which brain was in charge of his reasoning was anyone’s guess. “If it’s important, they’ll call.”

Laughter bubbled from her throat. “Oh, not so nice when the shoe’s on the other foot now, is it, McCoy?”

With a firm yank, he pulled her across the distance she’d achieved to the center of the bed and rolled so he towered over her in one smooth motion. The sudden change startled her, but it was unbearably attractive in the next moment. She blinked up at him.

“Like I said, if it’s important,” he growled, an arm braced above her head, “they can call.”

A strong part of Danielle desperately wanted to give him cheek in return and again call back to the start of the morning, even if it felt like a lifetime had passed since then. However, an equally tough portion of her brain did not want to look a gift horse in the mouth or waste an opportunity to explore this new facet of Leonard.

Her hand fell away from where it was still poised to grasp the PADD. The curiosity had won out.

Leonard grinned victoriously, if not wickedly.

He kissed her long enough to earn crescent-shaped indents on the back of his neck-- and to also curse his big mouth when her communicator chirped shrilly.

She pursed her swollen lips together, looking guilty. “I have to…”

He sighed and practically hurled himself flat on the bed next to her. “I know.”

Danielle dragged a hand across his chest and shimmied towards the night stand to snatch the offending piece of tech. “It’s my sister.” A frown. “ _Hello_?” she answered, trying to keep the exasperation from her voice.

In the next moment, she struggled to keep herself together at all.

“Leo.” She sat up, ramrod straight. “Turn on the news.”

The doctor didn’t even blink. He’d heard that tone of voice from her before. The last time was when their ship was the only thing standing between a time-travelling Romulan and the destruction of Earth. He shuddered to think what the cause was this time.

When the reporter’s voice could be heard in their bedroom, he glanced back at her to find she was already digging through her inbox, brow creasing deeper with each passing message. That couldn’t mean anything good either.

Thirty-five minutes later, they had the full picture: a terrorist had blown up the Kelvin Memorial Archive in London. His name was John Harrison and he was a member of Starfleet, although they still had no idea what had caused him to go rogue in such an explosive way. The damage had been massive in scale and while the body count had just reached 25, it was only the beginning. There was no telling how high it would climb once they got more boots on the ground and could start picking their way through the rubble.

Jim had messaged them a short while after the initial comm that he and Pike were on route to HQ for a meeting of all active command. Part of her wanted to warn him about the Admiral, but given the ongoing crisis, it didn’t seem like the time nor the place and she couldn’t be sure Jim wouldn’t spring into action, second chance be damned.

The only thing that the Doctors McCoy and Blake could do at that point was to start making calls to see where they could best serve as an added resource. For Leonard, that undoubtedly meant a trip to London to aid in the treatment of survivors with a reasonable chance he’d be called upon as a surgeon. For her, it meant liaising with Starfleet Intelligence and being deployed wherever they might send her. Depending on any leads, it could be to London just as easily as it could be back to headquarters or even off-planet.

She’d just received confirmation that she would have her orders within the hour when the apartment rocked with the force of an explosion. Momentarily frozen with shock, she could see flashes of light through the windows, lighting up the dark sky.

“Get down!” Leonard’s voice ripped her free from her astonishment and she found herself being dragged away from the glass by her bicep with a speed she hadn’t known he was capable of.

He tore open the door to the small walk-in closet next to the bathroom and closed it tightly behind them. The hangers and contents of the shelves trembled with each new blast, but it was the only space without windows in which they could both fit that would serve as a suitable place to hide.

With shoes and odds and ends toppling from the shelves all around them, they knelt in the center of the closet with their arms wrapped around each other. Enabled by the half a foot he had on his girlfriend, Leonard curved over so that his chin rested against her temple. Despite the temptation to tuck her head beneath his, he knew that one good hit from falling debris could result in enough force to bite clean through his tongue, crack some teeth, or even break his jaw upon impact with her skull. Still, the instinct to protect her in whatever way he could was undeniable.

From where her head was pressed up against his bare chest, Danielle could feel his heart thrumming against her cheek. He was as steady as ever in a crisis, but she knew that he was human. It was expected that he’d have a biological reaction to danger, though the tangible proof hadn’t been something she’d ever expected to experience.

Neither Danielle nor Leonard had any idea how much time passed before the shaking stopped and an eerie silence fell over the apartment.

It was only when the quiet persisted that she became more acutely aware of her surroundings. This included the darkness blanketing the closet, as they hadn’t tapped the touch pad on the exterior wall beside the doorframe. The only positive sign she took from it was that a lack of any light meant there were no holes in the door or walls, which indicated whatever weapons used hadn’t found their way inside their safe space. Still, it didn’t completely rule out the possibility of serious injury.

McCoy appeared to share the same train of thought. His hands patted over limbs and skimmed across skin at a rapid, but thorough pace. When he was satisfied his touch hadn’t revealed any damage, he felt his way up Danielle’s neck to cradle her face. “Are you hurt?”

“Just a few bruises.” She shook her head against his hands. He didn’t need to know that her shoulder hurt from when he’d yanked her away from the window, especially considering she’d gladly endure it a thousand times over if it meant their safety. “I’m okay, Leo. I promise.” She covered his hands to squeeze them. “What about you?”

“I took a shoe to the head that felt suspiciously like a high heel,” he groused, “but I’ll live.”

“I’d be more concerned if you didn’t have a complaint.” Her attempt at humor fell a little flat while the uncertainty as to what laid outside the door lingered. She turned her head with closed eyes, trying to focus on any ambient noise.

Leo’s voice dropped to a whisper. “What is it?”

Danielle exhaled slowly and let her hands fall away from his. “Nothing.” She swallowed thickly and he could feel the movement in his palms. “That’s just it. I don’t hear anything, but there’s no telling whether it’s over. It could just be the eye of the storm.”

“And if it is,” he hypothesized, “will we be safer somewhere else?”

“Maybe yes, maybe no. Before, through the window—the flashes were one right after the other. If repeated detonation caused the building to shake, it could be a chain of explosive devices, so if we stay here and something takes out the foundation, we come down with the building. However, if the flashes weren’t from incendiary devices, then they would have had to be from a ground or aerial assault with some sort of automatic weaponry system. With the kind of caliber they’d have needed to use in order to create these kind of shockwaves at the ground level, they could easily continue on through any glass to pierce through walls and doors.” Without even realizing it, Danielle’s hands ran up Leonard’s back and splayed over his lower back and a shoulder blade, as if suddenly realizing the damage that could have been done while the attack was still underway. “But if we leave, we’d have to go somewhere without glass and windows again. Closest place we have the highest chance of reaching safely is the parking garage. We could get there by using the stairs since the elevator is definitely a no-go right now. That being said, any full or partial building collapse traps us underground to suffocate, so…”

The way Leonard’s face completely twisted into a scowl was a sight of epic proportions, such that it was a shame it couldn’t be viewed in the darkness. “ _Great_.” He muttered something largely indiscernible, but she could at least pick out a few choice vulgarities that would likely give his grandmother cause to break out a wooden spoon. “Which gives us our best chance?”

Danielle paused to consider his question. It was the first time she was faced with a potential life or death situation out of uniform. “… I think we stay. I don’t know if we could even make it underground in time now. I have no idea how long it’s even _been_.”

She fumbled to grasp his hand in the darkness, though once she did lock her fingers around his, she tugged them lightly. After a short pause, the tension from her pull slackened, which indicated he’d started to follow her.

She felt along the floor until she connected with a pair of shoes butted up against the wall. It was easy to throw them and a few more errant pairs into a corner (the closet was a mess now anyway) to clear some space.

“Staying away from the door is probably the best idea right now. I don’t think I have anything made of metal in here to cover it with, though.” Her shoulders thudded softly against the wall as she settled. “But at least we’re not completely in the open now.”

“You mean you don’t happen to have a lab table stowed away in here that we can flip?” His voice was as dry as a bone.

“My boyfriend doesn’t like when I bring my work home with me.”

There was a snort not too far from her ear, followed by the warm press of Leonard’s arm against hers and the ghost of his left leg next to her right one. “Sounds like a hypocrite to me.” Fingers slotted through hers. “You sure you’re alright?”

“No, I’m positive that I’m _not_ , but I’ll let it catch up with me later.” Danielle kissed his knuckles. If they were out of options, she’d at least take comfort in the physical contact. It wasn’t the Enterprise; they didn’t have to be professional in the face of danger there. “What about you?”

“Well, I get to worry about being crushed to death under the weight of a building rather than being sucked into the vacuum of space, so that’s new to me.”

“So fine then,” she surmised and rested her head against his shoulder. “Now that our shoes have stopped attacking us, I’m realizing this has a very ‘Seven minutes in heaven’ vibe going for it.”

“… Jim is banned from our apartment indefinitely.”

* * *

 

The silence persisted for an indeterminable period of time and then ultimately, was cut short by the wail of sirens fairly nearby. They drew closer and closer until the proximity made it seem like they were right outside of the building, which was a distinct possibility.

She swallowed. “We shouldn’t make a break for it now without knowing, but I think it’s a safe time to at least take a quick look out the window. If emergency services are coming, chances are the situation is contained or containment is underway.”

When his girlfriend relinquished her hold on him, Leonard sighed. “If nothing else, I can put some goddamn pants on in case we do have to get the hell out of here.”

“Priorities,” she surmised with a roll of her eyes she was glad he couldn’t see in the dark.

“Damn right I have priorities,” he groused tightly, pushing his way onto his feet. “They released a chemical agent out there and you’re going to be damn grateful for every square inch of clothing on your body.”

“Those were rapid-fire explosions, likely incendiary devices judging by the reverberations. Chemical weaponry doesn’t create those kind of vibrations through ground level.” Her hand hovered over the doorknob, trying to see if she could feel heat radiating from the metal. “Hand me the first piece of clothing you can grab?”

Leonard swiped blindly around him and tugged free a shirt he managed to find somewhere off to his right. The hanger fell to the ground with a clink. “Here.” He pressed the fabric into her hand.

“Thanks.” Danielle bunched it up as tightly as it could be squished to create as thick of a barrier between the knob and her skin as possible. “Where are you? Don’t stand anywhere near the doorway.”

He snorted and hangers clacked together a few feet away. “I’m sure as shit not by the doorway anymore.”

The blonde blew out a short breath. She couldn’t feel any warmth beneath her palm or at her feet from the gap between the door and the floorboards, but that wasn’t to say danger didn’t lurk outside of the closet. Eighteen months as an officer in the field had taught her as much.

After a five-count, she yanked back the door. There was no grand fireball or overwhelming wave of heat, merely the louder sounds from the street below.

“I really need to start keeping a phaser in relevant areas of the apartment,” she sighed, poking her head around the solid rectangle in front of her. “Or at least the nightstand.”

“So long as it’s not under your pillow, you’ve got my full support.”

With the closet now draped in the lights from the bedroom, she realized she could see the damage inside for the first time. Frames and little odds and ends had toppled from any flat surfaces, but aside from a broken drawer that slid free from a dresser, the destruction was minimal. Even the closet, for all it looked like someone had thrown it into the spin cycle, was otherwise fine.

Her gaze fell on Leonard, standing taut with stress behind her. For all the conversation between them had easily flowed, even in a time of crisis, she could feel how tightly wound he was just by looking at him. Then again, she felt much the same.

“It’s safe to leave,” she finally told him to break the silence. “There isn’t any broken glass either.”

He silently nodded and she turned back to the bedroom so her eyes could flick to the windows. There were no more flashes, but a clear haze in the air that was to be expected. Her feet drew her to the floor-to-ceiling panes before she knew it.

Danielle wasn’t sure whether the panic caused her heart to clench in her chest or bile to churn in her stomach first on the sight of the smoldering ruins of Starfleet HQ’s Daystrom Building.

“Leonard, get dressed,” she snapped out, already rummaging through her drawers for the first pair of jeans that she could find. They were halfway up her legs before he even knew what hit him.

The stark change in her demeanor startled him, but from concern rather than offense. He had just pulled on his boots when he found his way over to the windows. “ _Fuck_ ,” he growled.

Leonard didn’t even know when he’d dialed Jim’s frequency’s on his communicator, but after getting his voicemail for the third time straight, he was more on edge than he thought he’d ever been. Danielle was similarly unsuccessful in getting ahold of Pike.

They grabbed the first jackets they could find, which turned out to be hooded sweatshirts, and practically sprinted the four blocks. Under any other circumstances, McCoy would have likely cursed up a blue streak and complained the whole way, but all that he could think about was what carnage could lay waiting for them in the tower or worse yet, below.

It was difficult to push their way through security at first due to their civilian clothing, but they’d at least had the foresight to snag their ID badges on the way out the door which greased the rest of the way to the front of the building and out of the throng of reporters and rubberneckers.

Leonard could barely swallow at the sight of Jim emerging from the shattered doors, literally stepping through the frame where the glass had once been. His hands were bloodied, there was already a shiner blossoming around his right eye, and he could see a seeping cut poking out of his hairline, but he was walking and likely talking, so he’d take what he could get.

“Jim!” he called out to him before he could stop himself. The reporters started calling his name from the distance security had cordoned off the scene and light bulbs flashed mere seconds later, but he tried not to let it get under his skin because he knew it was only a short time before _someone_ recognized the fleet’s youngest (former) Captain and that shock of golden hair that had become synonymous with the golden boy.

When Kirk looked up, his normally vibrant blue eyes were devoid of their usual brightness. Instead, they were pale and somewhat unfocused. “Bones?” His voice was so uncharacteristically quiet, words spoken merely to himself, that McCoy was glad his ability to read lips hadn’t abated that much.

“What the _fuck_ did you get yourself into, kid?” Leonard exhaled, already grabbing his chin to check the cut to his temple. “Not that I’m not glad to see you’re in one piece or anything.”

“Jim?” Danielle craned her neck to look around her former captain. Once she knew that Jim had managed to make it out with only minor injuries, her focus shifted. “Where’s Uncle Chris? Did he follow you out?”

McCoy felt Jim’s swallow against his fingertips and his jaw tightened when he turned away from them to look at Danielle. Leonard had the good grace to let him go.

“ _Jim_?” she repeated and took an audible breath. “Where is he?”

Kirk took a few steps towards her until he could loosely curl his fingers around her upper arms. It was only then, when he was directly in front of her, that she realized his eyes were wet.

“No…” Her voice was higher pitched when she spoke again, alarm creeping in, “Jim, _no…”_

“I’m sorry,” he spoke softly, voice wrought with his own burgeoning grief. “I’m so sorry, Danielle.”

The blonde tried to rip herself free from Jim’s grip. She thrashed in an effort to pull away, but he only held on tight. “No! You’re wrong! You’ve made a mistake!”

“It was Harrison,” he explained as calmly as he was capable of given the circumstance, blue eyes fixed on her in an effort to impress upon her his certainty. “The attack in London was a ploy to get us all here so he could corner us where we had nowhere to go and no way to fight back. He’s—he’s gone, Danielle.”

She gave Jim a hard shove this time and he stumbled back from both the force and the surprise of the impact. “You’re _wrong_ ,” she seethed in reply. “How would you even know?!? You’re not a doctor!”

Jim finally snapped. “Because I was there!” His breaths were heavy and plosive through his nose. “I saw him get hit, but I couldn’t get to him. We were under too much fire, so I tried to return it as best I could until Harrison teleported out. Afterwards, I went looking for him, but he wasn’t—“ This time, his inhale was steadying. “I saw him go.”

Breathing didn’t come easy for Danielle Blake after that. Instead, each breath came in short bursts as her eyes burned. Mouth quivering, she looked away from Jim just in time for the tears to fall. “He was alone,” she wept, shaky fingers gripping the heavy gray fabric of Jim’s singed coat. “He was in pain and he was dying, but no one was there for him.”

“Spock was there.” It was an odd thing to say in light of the circumstances, but Kirk knew the alternative was far worse. At least, bad enough that the Vulcan’s presence would be of some comfort in an otherwise unbearable time. “Say what you want about him, which I freely will, but he was there. And I got to see him before—“ His jaw clenched. “It was just for a minute, but he knew I was there, too. He wasn’t alone, I promise.”

She nodded absently, but the tears were streaming uncontrollably by then. Sensing she was going to crumple at any moment, Jim released her arms long enough to enfold her in his, but he knew that the embrace would hold him together as much as it would her.

The minutes stretched on for what felt like hours as they stood there in the dark of night, illuminated by the flashing lights of emergency vehicles and the dim glow of smoldering fires they’d once struggled to put out. Leonard had smartly positioned his back directly in front of them to block the prying eyes of the gathered crowd and any photographers looking to score themselves an iconic photograph that would be circulated on every news channel and in every form of electronic distribution. He would be there to comfort her and mourn in his own way later on, but Jim and Danielle had lost the man who was the closest thing to a father either had ever known. For now, he would stand as a sentinel between them and the rest of the world.

Their silence a stark contrast to the wailing silence, they stood together. And they grieved.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the hardest chapter I’ve ever written. I knew from the very beginning that the story was not going to “fix” this particular plot point and Pike was going to die. I’ve actually had the first 10 pages of the chapter written for months now, but could not seem to write this last scene. It came in fits and starts, but I finished it over the past two days and here we are.
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone for your continued support. Getting all of your reviews and messages telling me how you hoped for a new chapter kept me going during this horrible period of writer’s block.
> 
> I hope you won’t throw any tomatoes at me for following canon, but I think that Chris Pike’s death will really shape Danielle’s story moving forward for a long while yet. I’ve written some snippets of the next chapter and can FIRMLY tell you that we are going to see a bit of a showdown between Admiral Blake and Bones for reasons that are going to put a wrench in everyone’s plans, but they’re ones I can’t reveal right now.
> 
> Okay, really don’t throw tomatoes at me after that. Unless they’re in review form. ;)
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> Xoxo Elle


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